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Sounds like you had really bad luck.
Also, your boyfriend seems to be an addict and not a passionate gamer, just as people pointed out. If he was passionate he'd clearly do everything in a more structured way etc.
This "He is just TOO lucky" theory isn't even far away from reality:
Why should he bother doing something when he gets what he wants anyway?
Maybe he thinks the same way about you? "She's here anyway so who cares"...
I don't know.
I don't know what you should do but I can however wish you the best of luck.
Seems like you deserve it!
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On August 22 2011 17:05 Kiwifruit wrote:
Firstly, post a picture of yourself. Secondly, I can tell from reading this blog that you were initially attracted to him because he had balls. He sounds like an alpha who holds his ground and doesn't give a shit about what people think of him.
I'm not trying to be harsh - but merely stating a fact of reality.
For guys, what they look for in a chick is 90% about looks, 10% personality.
So if you're looking for a new partner - it doesn't matter if you work in a female dominated industry. If you are hot, guys will naturally hit on you in the street. If you are not hot, then unfortunately this is going to be an issue. If you want a new partner you'll need to work on your looks.
Wow. I'm not exactly sure how I should respond to this.
If I posted a picture of myself, I'd be classified as some attention whore on TL. This has happened before on here to other female posters.
I look damn good in those revealing/scantily clad type pictures. And just as good in regular, fully clothed ones. I just don't want that image. I honestly feel bad when you guys give a certain female poster a hard time over what she chooses to post.
Your comment has me pissed off and tempted though. Grats....
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We should go out. I'm not a leech and I like playing games, and girls who play games. There, game set match we're a couple. See you on saturday.
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On August 22 2011 17:15 Porcelain wrote:Show nested quote +On August 22 2011 17:05 Kiwifruit wrote:
Firstly, post a picture of yourself. Secondly, I can tell from reading this blog that you were initially attracted to him because he had balls. He sounds like an alpha who holds his ground and doesn't give a shit about what people think of him.
I'm not trying to be harsh - but merely stating a fact of reality.
For guys, what they look for in a chick is 90% about looks, 10% personality.
So if you're looking for a new partner - it doesn't matter if you work in a female dominated industry. If you are hot, guys will naturally hit on you in the street. If you are not hot, then unfortunately this is going to be an issue. If you want a new partner you'll need to work on your looks. Wow. I'm not exactly sure how I should respond to this. If I posted a picture of myself, I'd be classified as some attention whore on TL. This has happened before on here to other female posters. I look damn good in those revealing/scantily clad type pictures. And just as good in regular, fully clothed ones. I just don't want that image. I honestly feel bad when you guys give a certain female poster a hard time over what she chooses to post. Your comment has me pissed off and tempted though. Grats....
Kiwi sounds a bit brash, but it's 100% true. Look, it has even piqued your interest, lol.
Too bad Kiwi's technique is not my style or maybe I can see more hot pics.
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On August 22 2011 17:15 Porcelain wrote:Show nested quote +On August 22 2011 17:05 Kiwifruit wrote:
Firstly, post a picture of yourself. Secondly, I can tell from reading this blog that you were initially attracted to him because he had balls. He sounds like an alpha who holds his ground and doesn't give a shit about what people think of him.
I'm not trying to be harsh - but merely stating a fact of reality.
For guys, what they look for in a chick is 90% about looks, 10% personality.
So if you're looking for a new partner - it doesn't matter if you work in a female dominated industry. If you are hot, guys will naturally hit on you in the street. If you are not hot, then unfortunately this is going to be an issue. If you want a new partner you'll need to work on your looks. Wow. I'm not exactly sure how I should respond to this. If I posted a picture of myself, I'd be classified as some attention whore on TL. This has happened before on here to other female posters. I look damn good in those revealing/scantily clad type pictures. And just as good in regular, fully clothed ones. I just don't want that image. I honestly feel bad when you guys give a certain female poster a hard time over what she chooses to post. Your comment has me pissed off and tempted though. Grats....
You wanted a male opinion, you get one and are now pissed off. Jesus Christ. And you sound like a guy bragging about his e-penis.
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Katowice25012 Posts
I'm a dude who stays up all night, typically playing games, and then wakes up in "the morning" (I can say this because my alarm is set for 11, beating noon by a whole hour) to go to my job working with video games. Am I a gamer? Does that make me responsible? Where do I fit in here?
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Canada5155 Posts
On August 22 2011 17:23 Azzur wrote:Show nested quote +On August 22 2011 17:15 Porcelain wrote:On August 22 2011 17:05 Kiwifruit wrote:
Firstly, post a picture of yourself. Secondly, I can tell from reading this blog that you were initially attracted to him because he had balls. He sounds like an alpha who holds his ground and doesn't give a shit about what people think of him.
I'm not trying to be harsh - but merely stating a fact of reality.
For guys, what they look for in a chick is 90% about looks, 10% personality.
So if you're looking for a new partner - it doesn't matter if you work in a female dominated industry. If you are hot, guys will naturally hit on you in the street. If you are not hot, then unfortunately this is going to be an issue. If you want a new partner you'll need to work on your looks. Wow. I'm not exactly sure how I should respond to this. If I posted a picture of myself, I'd be classified as some attention whore on TL. This has happened before on here to other female posters. I look damn good in those revealing/scantily clad type pictures. And just as good in regular, fully clothed ones. I just don't want that image. I honestly feel bad when you guys give a certain female poster a hard time over what she chooses to post. Your comment has me pissed off and tempted though. Grats.... Kiwi sounds a bit brash, but it's 100% true. Look, it has even piqued your interest, lol. Too bad Kiwi's technique is not my style or maybe I can see more hot pics.
Yeah, totally true. The guy who plays LoL all night and has his parents pay for all his shit is definitely "Alpha."
She totally just fell for his sheer confidence and turned into a quivering female mess, unable to resist.
*slams down a copy of The Game*
EDIT: SUP HEYOKA
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On August 22 2011 17:27 Kiwifruit wrote:Show nested quote +On August 22 2011 17:15 Porcelain wrote:On August 22 2011 17:05 Kiwifruit wrote:
Firstly, post a picture of yourself. Secondly, I can tell from reading this blog that you were initially attracted to him because he had balls. He sounds like an alpha who holds his ground and doesn't give a shit about what people think of him.
I'm not trying to be harsh - but merely stating a fact of reality.
For guys, what they look for in a chick is 90% about looks, 10% personality.
So if you're looking for a new partner - it doesn't matter if you work in a female dominated industry. If you are hot, guys will naturally hit on you in the street. If you are not hot, then unfortunately this is going to be an issue. If you want a new partner you'll need to work on your looks. Wow. I'm not exactly sure how I should respond to this. If I posted a picture of myself, I'd be classified as some attention whore on TL. This has happened before on here to other female posters. I look damn good in those revealing/scantily clad type pictures. And just as good in regular, fully clothed ones. I just don't want that image. I honestly feel bad when you guys give a certain female poster a hard time over what she chooses to post. Your comment has me pissed off and tempted though. Grats.... You wanted a male opinion, you get one and are now pissed off. Jesus Christ. And you sound like a guy bragging about his e-penis.
Okay, okay. I'm not that mad lol.
+ Show Spoiler +only because you related me to a guy bragging about his e-penis. which made me giggle.
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On August 22 2011 17:29 HawaiianPig wrote:Show nested quote +On August 22 2011 17:23 Azzur wrote:On August 22 2011 17:15 Porcelain wrote:On August 22 2011 17:05 Kiwifruit wrote:
Firstly, post a picture of yourself. Secondly, I can tell from reading this blog that you were initially attracted to him because he had balls. He sounds like an alpha who holds his ground and doesn't give a shit about what people think of him.
I'm not trying to be harsh - but merely stating a fact of reality.
For guys, what they look for in a chick is 90% about looks, 10% personality.
So if you're looking for a new partner - it doesn't matter if you work in a female dominated industry. If you are hot, guys will naturally hit on you in the street. If you are not hot, then unfortunately this is going to be an issue. If you want a new partner you'll need to work on your looks. Wow. I'm not exactly sure how I should respond to this. If I posted a picture of myself, I'd be classified as some attention whore on TL. This has happened before on here to other female posters. I look damn good in those revealing/scantily clad type pictures. And just as good in regular, fully clothed ones. I just don't want that image. I honestly feel bad when you guys give a certain female poster a hard time over what she chooses to post. Your comment has me pissed off and tempted though. Grats.... Kiwi sounds a bit brash, but it's 100% true. Look, it has even piqued your interest, lol. Too bad Kiwi's technique is not my style or maybe I can see more hot pics. Yeah, totally true. The guy who plays LoL all night and has his parents pay for all his shit is definitely "Alpha." She totally just fell for his sheer confidence and turned into a quivering female mess, unable to resist. *slams down a copy of The Game*EDIT: SUP HEYOKA
Haha, wasn't referring to they guy being alpha as true - more like what kiwi said in the subsequent paragraphs about guys hitting on hit chicks.
Btw, u didn't answer my earlier question - how did u get that icon?????
I just worked it out: you must be the creator of all those elephant pics?
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On August 22 2011 17:29 heyoka wrote:
I'm a dude who stays up all night, typically playing games, and then wakes up in "the morning" (I can say this because my alarm is set for 11, beating noon by a whole hour) to go to my job working with video games. Am I a gamer? Does that make me responsible? Where do I fit in here?
It's 3am, what do you think I'm doing? And I have to wake up tomorrow for work. Granted, I'm going in later in the afternoon. But still.
In response to your many question marks - YES. That makes you responsible.
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I have to say I'm kind of surprised you still live with him. You need to move out ASAP. Staying there will only prolong your feelings of frustration/anger/whatever. I would seriously go crazy if I were in your situation...like, bang my head against the wall and ask why am I still living together with someone who pushes my buttons and doesn't seem to give a crap about me lol
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Yo. Some advice on how to find and engage in a relationship with someone possessing greater maturity than your room mate;
Work on some kind of deep interest like HawaiianPig discussed. You should be looking for people with some passion, but try to use the interim to determine some of your own. There's nothing more boring than chatting up a girl and hearing 'oh well I like a lot of different music/books/movies' and 'I like hanging out and stuff' or the dreaded 'I like games,' which often translates to Angry Birds, Peggle or Farmville, often windowed to the side of her consistently-refreshing facebook page.
My half of a conversation with a stranger is all about curiosity and genuine interest - it's never about what you like (barring hate crimes or murder) but about how much you dig it. If your attitude towards what you think is valuable enough to reveal to me is vague and milquetoast, that's probably gonna be my attitude in response. Your hobbies could lie on the furthest fringes, but if you are into them, I will be enchanted.
Adopt some strong opinions. If we disagree on something, drop logic bombs. It's hot, tbh.
Be discerning in taste. Instead of a 'gamer', tell me you dig Final Fantasy or Starcraft or Tetris, it's all good.
Be proud of yourself, because I'm sure you're awesome.
This is just what I've grown to seek out after ~4 years of consistent dating followed by a long period of solitude to get my head straight, but I think these qualities lead to being a magnetic person universally. I'm a self-sufficient undergrad student in his senior year, totally unspoiled, and a lover of gaming for competition's sake. We ain't all bums! :b
+ Show Spoiler +Bonus anecdotal - My best friend recently broke up with her live-in boyfriend of three years. He had similar apathetic qualities about 'real life' - any trips out had to be extensively planned, or didn't catch his interest, or were interesting but inferior to his desire to read fantasy novels or play dat Halo. She's rather athletic, has hedonistic urges, enjoys the flirtation of dancing and is sociable in spades. The single life is rocking for her and has been all summer. By proxy, it comes highly recommended.
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Indeed, quite frankly I agree with a lot of what has been said thus far. Number one, you should try to move out. It's useful to be able at the very least to "unclog" your lifestyle. Get rid of the clutter of having to look at a lazy privileged slob all day.
Apart from that, I also agree that your ex has crossed the thin line between passion and addiction. However that is uncharacteristic of the gaming community, and definitely shouldn't have you giving up on gamers all together! Come to a certain point, we all realise that it is exceptionally rare to be able to live off of our passion, and find a way for gaming to stay a hobby rather than become a way of life. He just isn't there yet, and his parents are seemingly just helping him delay the inevitable. In the end it'll make the shock harder on him, and on his partner as well.
May I ask however, how do you meet such people? In this case it was your roommate, perhaps in the future make a rule to only date people you've seen/met in a socially open environment? In any case I think that at this point you have managed to learn from your mistake and probably won't commit to such a boyfriend again.
Which leads me to me next point... What are you expecting out of the comments in this blog? Now that you've gotten reasonnable advice (move out!), info on gamers (we're awesome, date us, especially the Swiss ones, just not the sociopathic minority) and attracted some trolls (thanks Kiwifruit), as Clooney would say, what else?
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On August 22 2011 15:50 Porcelain wrote:BTW, the punctuation goes inside the "quotation marks."  Only in American convention. 
And yes, I suppose my judge of character is flawed. : / I have difficulty finding a keeper.
I don't think you can blame yourself too much for that. It's hard to work out before a relationship whether you have conflicting goals in life.
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Beyonder
Netherlands15103 Posts
On August 22 2011 17:29 heyoka wrote:
I'm a dude who stays up all night, typically playing games, and then wakes up in "the morning" (I can say this because my alarm is set for 11, beating noon by a whole hour) to go to my job working with video games. Am I a gamer? Does that make me responsible? Where do I fit in here?
You dont have a girlfriend. Soon, she wont have a boyfriend. You prove that you're different than the guy and that youre passionate. I can see a good fit right here.
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There is a simple rule:
If he doesn't have a job or didn't have a job for longer than 3 month (short periods of unemployment are excuseable) he's not worth it, no matter how pretty, nice or good in bed he is. No job, no match.
I'm a gamer, too, i spend 4-6 hours a day playing games (or well, currently mostly watching streams because i'm too afraid of the ladder :p) and still have a job, so there is no correlation between being a gamer and having a job and a reallife.
Follow that one simple rule and you will be a lot happier.
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On August 22 2011 18:21 Malyce wrote:
Indeed, quite frankly I agree with a lot of what has been said thus far. Number one, you should try to move out. It's useful to be able at the very least to "unclog" your lifestyle. Get rid of the clutter of having to look at a lazy privileged slob all day.
Apart from that, I also agree that your ex has crossed the thin line between passion and addiction. However that is uncharacteristic of the gaming community, and definitely shouldn't have you giving up on gamers all together! Come to a certain point, we all realise that it is exceptionally rare to be able to live off of our passion, and find a way for gaming to stay a hobby rather than become a way of life. He just isn't there yet, and his parents are seemingly just helping him delay the inevitable. In the end it'll make the shock harder on him, and on his partner as well.
May I ask however, how do you meet such people? In this case it was your roommate, perhaps in the future make a rule to only date people you've seen/met in a socially open environment? In any case I think that at this point you have managed to learn from your mistake and probably won't commit to such a boyfriend again.
Which leads me to me next point... What are you expecting out of the comments in this blog? Now that you've gotten reasonnable advice (move out!), info on gamers (we're awesome, date us, especially the Swiss ones, just not the sociopathic minority) and attracted some trolls (thanks Kiwifruit), as Clooney would say, what else?
Haha, Kiwifruit got permabanned (good). I felt silly for responding to his comment the way I did, but he pissed me off!
I wasn't sure what to expect in the comments, but I'm rather pleased with the responses I did get. A lot of good insight.
However, I'm not sure why everyone thinks I have the ability to up and leave. It's not that easy, and I can't afford to live alone. I'm actually comfortable being here. My ex/roommate doesn't really bother me. Seriously! When we are together, we're more like friends and we certainly don't hate each other. I work a lot, and he does his own thing.
Also, I would totally date a "Swiss one." Or any foreign boy for that matter.
What girl can resist the sexy accents?! lolol.
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Canada5155 Posts
On August 22 2011 18:42 Beyonder wrote:Show nested quote +On August 22 2011 17:29 heyoka wrote:
I'm a dude who stays up all night, typically playing games, and then wakes up in "the morning" (I can say this because my alarm is set for 11, beating noon by a whole hour) to go to my job working with video games. Am I a gamer? Does that make me responsible? Where do I fit in here? You dont have a girlfriend. Soon, she wont have a boyfriend. You prove that you're different than the guy and that youre passionate. I can see a good fit right here.
Hey man, I've found your new icon:
![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/oVIzb.gif)
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On August 22 2011 15:42 Porcelain wrote:Show nested quote +On August 22 2011 15:39 SkyLegenD wrote:
Being a gamer does not equate to being a bum. Not all gamers leech of their parents for everything. Um, I know. It's my luck. Not all gamers I've dated have been leechers. A few of them worked, but they seemed less motivated to grow up. Just in general. I blame it on them being in their early twenties.
Haha, I'm almost 30 and still haven't grown up, why would I? Sure I've been working for quite some time now, bought a home and have to pay the bank monthly, have savings but I'm still a little kid and I love it. If only I'd win the lottery but am too lazy to go play and it's just a big waste of money really.
The worst thing that could ever happen in my life would be getting a promotion to a managerial position. It's bad enough I've had to take over as project manager now. I like being the slave on the cotton plantation as long as I don't have to work in a cubicle and don't have to work overtime the entire year.
As long as I make enough money to not need anything and have some leftover I don't need extra goals, I love my job and wouldn't sell out too cheap.
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On August 22 2011 18:54 HawaiianPig wrote:Show nested quote +On August 22 2011 18:42 Beyonder wrote:On August 22 2011 17:29 heyoka wrote:
I'm a dude who stays up all night, typically playing games, and then wakes up in "the morning" (I can say this because my alarm is set for 11, beating noon by a whole hour) to go to my job working with video games. Am I a gamer? Does that make me responsible? Where do I fit in here? You dont have a girlfriend. Soon, she wont have a boyfriend. You prove that you're different than the guy and that youre passionate. I can see a good fit right here. Hey man, I've found your new icon:
Haha, cute.
Oh, Beyonder. Heyoka has a good point lol! <3
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EPT
