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I really am having trouble since my last blog post.
I started a whiteboard to motivate me it read:
MY GOALS
• MLG Columbus -- Must go
• ProGaming -- Must win
• Zerg -- Must master.
Too bad all those dreams were put to rest in a second. I asked my mom If I could go to MLG. No it wasnt an ask, it was a beg. And she rejected the idea the second I said it was in Columbus. That means everything else was down the drain, I am too depressed to touch the game I once loved. I cried that night, made bad grades, didnt talk to friends. I was beyond depressed.
But I think that my depression was more than just me not going to MLG -- Must have been bullying at school, grades, etc. People look at gaming competitions like they are a waste of time, I wish people werent inconsiderate dicks. This is crap, so is my life. I went through a lot of depression. A LOT. I thought about suicide, I thought about cutting myself. I tried that, it hurts. =/ To add to everything my grades have been dropping, if I make an F its goodbye starcraft, I would have to spend the night at my friends home. Ive been watching the streams for a while -- my favorite is ROOTCatZ most definitely. Really inspirational the kind of stuff he says. My favorite would be "Fungal Tyler! Fuck Tyler Fungal!!" awesome life changing quote, almost as powerful as the Jimmy NoooOoOOOo Destiny VOD. Lawlz. In other good news I am getting my computer put together after 5 years. I just upgraded from 1gb of memory to 4gb and got me the GeForce GTX 560ti (MSI) plus a new power supply. Now I just need a new motherboard and I might win something. =/ I went Zerg, absolutely the best race ever, for the swarm bitches. Any tips on getting out of bronze would help, PM me the tips, would appreciate that so much! I think all my blogs are going to have questions for TLmembers to answer down below, so here we go! :D
Also, I am going to start streaming when the memory actually gets here, join in! If I can get a spot on TL that would be good, but I doubt a 14 is fun to listen to  but hell why not.
Is MLG really worth getting depressed about? or should I just calm down and wait for another one that is closer?
Thanks for reading,
Collins "CabelD / Jagerbomb"
 
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Where do you live, in respect to Colombus
And either you're trolling or crazy in respects to suicide.
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Demand the woman who had clothed you and gave you a roof over your head to send you to MLG Colombus.
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The suicide thing was a different subject. I had really bad grades and my parents and I werent really that close, had many fights with my dad and mom over stupid shit. I am all better now :D
On Columbus, I do live in MS. It would be a long drive.
Lol I tried to get the women who clothed and fed me to take me. Obviously gaming is not a real hobby to her.
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Wait, were you planning on going to MLG to compete? And you're feeling down about not being able to?
Well if you WERE going to compete, I don't think you should feel disappointed that you can't go now, since you said you're still only bronze and you'd get your ass handed to you, even if you practiced your ass off till then. I mean... you're bronze.
If you were going just to watch... Hell, then just watch the stream from home!
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Just focus on training first, even if you went to MLG do you think you'd get far? If you win some online tournaments and perhaps get a bit of $$$ that way it might show your mom that it's something you care about and can make something from. Then again she might not care, worth a try though.
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@ Chrono and Jono -- More like watching, but damn I would mind a game against IdrA even if I lost  But still it would be a fun experience and my parents still wouldnt let me go if I paid for everything.
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if you were just gonna watch save money, stay home and watch the stream.
On April 22 2011 11:52 CabelD wrote:
That means everything else was down the drain, I am too depressed to touch the game I once loved. I cried that night, pissed the bed, I was beyond depressed.
wat
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Try setting realistic goals.
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@ Zapling -- Thank you for the support 
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It helps if you make your goals quantifiable too.
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Bro I think you need to get some other life goals, or see a therapist :\ I'm being serious, getting depressed about starcraft seems really whack
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Not depressed anymore -- this is about three weeks ago, I think it was other things that were happening at the same time that made it worse that it actually was. I am also bullied at schools which is why my grades are falling. Thanks for the comments -- But nah im not crazy. :D well not that crazy.
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Im not saying give up on your dreams if that's what you truely want, but damn man, don't get so upset over a video game. Focus on getting out of bronze first.
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T.O.P.
Hong Kong4685 Posts
What's so important about going to MLG Columbus?
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So you created a blog to tell us that you pissed your bed?
I wish I rated this five stars... oh wait no I don't.
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And to stop the bullies, next time they start shit just smile at them and say "fuck with me again and ill stab each of you and cut your tongues out, you pig fuckers"
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and they said I need therapy ZaplinG! xD jk
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EPT
