EPTrofl that can't be a coincidence. You obviously failed because you didn't skate in the proper fashion: with a skateboard. Don't try to half ass it and try to work iceskating up to the level of real skating
u gotta skate
Utterly mind-fucked by girl - Page 6
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KvkG
United States65 Posts
rofl that can't be a coincidence. You obviously failed because you didn't skate in the proper fashion: with a skateboard. Don't try to half ass it and try to work iceskating up to the level of real skating u gotta skate | ||
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iNcontroL
USA29055 Posts
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Ghardo
Germany1685 Posts
+ Show Spoiler + :[ | ||
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SkylineSC
United States564 Posts
that and your probably not attractive or smart enough. asian girls are superficial | ||
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IdrA
United States11541 Posts
On December 31 2009 04:31 {88}iNcontroL wrote: That isn't funny. Spewing terrible memes all over tl.net will not get you anywhere. jlig | ||
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SonuvBob
Aiur21550 Posts
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DoX.)
Singapore6164 Posts
On December 31 2009 04:25 KvkG wrote: rofl that can't be a coincidence. You obviously failed because you didn't skate in the proper fashion: with a skateboard. Don't try to half ass it and try to work iceskating up to the level of real skating u gotta skate LOL | ||
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iNcontroL
USA29055 Posts
God bless you. | ||
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HowitZer
United States1610 Posts
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Colbert
Canada148 Posts
I've been a professional dating coach in canada for a while now. I teach men mainly 1on1, and my ultimate goal is to get them on a path towards success. This means, they need to understand where they are, understand where (want) to go, and most importantly, how to get there. Now, I'm going to give you some food for thought, and whether or not you implement any of this, that's up to you. But if you do, you'll most definitely have much more success (whether that be one night stands, a girlfriend, just making friends in general, etc). Alright. That's enough about me. Let's do this thing. One of the most important concepts that applies in every aspect of life (dating, starcraft, etc), is to take full responsibility if something doesn't work out how you want it to. Never blame anyone but yourself. An example: You are protoss, and you lose to a zerg. You could cry "ZVP IMBA!!!" or, you could watch the replay and see where you could have improved. Just like here, you posted saying how you didn't do anything wrong and how it was this girl who is just a headcase being totally weird. From what I read, there are a few different areas you could have improved and that would have landed you (at the very least) on a date with the girl, and by saying anything (such as, "i wasnt really that interested anyways") other than "shit, I fucked up", you are only protecting your ego, and re-in forcing these bad habits that caused this in the first place. On December 28 2009 12:57 resonance wrote: Ok so I started work at a clothing store about 3 months ago or so. Everything is all good, I am liking my job, I am liking my co-workers, etc.. Anyway, there is a co-worker who is a year younger than me and pretty decent looking. We talked a lot at work and she seemed very into me, and I was interested in her as well. We talked for a while and I got very good indicators of interest from her. I was thinking about asking her to do something, however I did not want to date anybody from work simply to avoid possible problems (I really want to keep this job). She told me a while ago that she is starting school in January, and might be leaving work. I'm thinking that's a great opportunity to ask her to do something. At the beginning of December she tells me that she is quitting work by the end of December. I'm thinking that's great I'll ask her out when she quits. But hell you know what, why should that be a reason to not ask her out. I need some experience, why the hell not. She is into me, why the hell not. This is all for the most part - good. I have the same philosophy (avoid dating co-workers). On December 28 2009 12:57 resonance wrote: So we had a work party and she came and she was quiet as hell the whole time. I thought it was kinda peculiar but w/e, nobody really talked much at the work party because nobody wanted to say something stupid and be possibly fired/in trouble/etc.. This was around the 22nd. So after that she texts me asking me something about work, and I replied. We sent a couple texts and we start text chatting and I ask her what she has planned for the break. She replies: "haha well i have 3 more days of work! and then next week i just chill = we shud hang out! Wat's up for ur break?" I'm thinking, wow ok she must be pretty damn into me to ask ME out, I don't know many girls who ask guys out unless they are REALLY into the guys. So as a few people have already said, this is more her way of opening the door for you instead of blatantly asking you out. Internally your reaction was sort of good, but sort of bad. Basically, the problem that happened was you took it as basically that she's super into you, and it's a guaranteed thing (ie: it's going to go very well). On December 28 2009 12:57 resonance wrote: So I am like wow dope. I say ok let's do it. I even mention that I was about to ask her to do something but she beat me to it. It's tough not to do, but I don't really like it when you mention that you were going to do the same thing. To me, it comes across as, you've been thinking about it but were too much of a pussy to actually ask. It doesn't benefit you in any way really. A few variations you could have done instead are: "Ya... I've been meaning you ask you out for awhile, butt I've been wayy too busy." or, more appropriate for your case... "Ya, I wanted to ask you out, but I don't date co-workers, so anyways...." This type of thing works really well, but you need to make sure when you say it you go "so anyways.." and onto a new topic right away... that way she's processing the comment on more of a sub-conscious level instead of you being quiet and waiting for her to react to it. Something like this will really set the frame well for your date. On December 28 2009 12:57 resonance wrote: Now at this point I'm thinking, this is pretty dope. I got a girl who is really interested in me, and I hardly did anything to get to that point. I call her a couple days later, and recommend ice skating. Firstly I am really not into movies, I think it totally screams boring guy. Secondly, ice skating would make certain the mood the clear, this wasn't just being friends. She sounded very nervous and was like "sure ok!". Seemed good. Nervousness is great. Gotta love that awkwardness period in between friends and a potential relationship. This is all good. Ice-skating is a great date because there's a good chance the girl sucks at skating, so she will want to hold onto you a lot. On December 28 2009 12:57 resonance wrote: So I go to work again and this was the last day she was working and we chat a bit. However, I notice she really isn't into the convos. She loses interest fast, one time she even interrupted me to talk to somebody else. I was thinking what the hell, that's a bit rude. She is talking to other people more than me, etc.. I'm not too worried though, I blame it on that awkwardness period. Don't blame her, she is kinda shy anyway (funny cuz she asked me out!). Throughout the whole post, there's various instances where you show your lack of confidence. Up until this point you aren't showing it too much, but it's subtle things like this that give it away. Things like over-analyzing her behavior, reading into things wayyy to much. You guys have a date coming up, she wants to go because she likes you, and vice versa, just be chill until that day comes. [/quote] On December 28 2009 12:57 resonance wrote: So I'm starting to be concerned here whether or not she meant to go as friends or a potential relationship. I browse her facebook that night and notice she is going to the movies with a co-worker friend of mine my age! I'm like...what the fuck? Wtf is going on. She is confusing me the hell out of me. So this is a perfect example. You are already being insecure about whether or not she wants to go out as friends or as a date. OF COURSE IT IS A DATE. The only thing keeping it from being a date is you. Browsing her facebook is not only (creepy), but also reaaallly bad. Who gives a shit if she's going to the movies with a co-worker of yours. It's not like you guys are married. Your expectations seem a bit much. There is nothing stopping her from going on any amount of dates, or sleeping with any amount of guys. Until you two are "mutually exclusive", her dating life is irrelevant to you. Much like yours is irrelevant to her. On December 28 2009 12:57 resonance wrote: So I call her and she doesn't pick up. I send a text saying I need to talk to you something is bothering me. Tomorrow, which was today, I called her up after work. "hey do you have a few minutes to talk?" she replies "um sure okkayy" I say, "k I'm going to be really honest here and I want you to do the same" "okayy.." She sounds nervous, as if I am about to propose to her or something. "I am really confused right now and...am getting really mixed........feelings from you. What were your intentions when you asked me to do something? Do you know what I mean? -nice awkward pause- "oh..justt friendss" are you effing kidding me... I explain my side of the story. She contributes almost nothing to the conversation. I ask at the end of another pause: "so uh...is there anything you wanted to say?" "umm...sorryyy" Honestly dude, this isn't attractive behavior. You are treating her like a "girlfriend" when you haven't even been on the first date yet. You are putting wayyy too much pressure on her. I can guarantee she originally wanted to go on a "date" with you, but after seeing how reactive you became once that was set in stone, she lost all attraction. She said "oh justt friends" because you put a ton of pressure on her. Making her decide. Example. Go up to a girl and ask her what kind of music she likes. The majority of the time, what will she say? "Everything". Does she really like everything? Probably not. She's answering "Everything" because that is the easiest and quickest response, to get you to shut up and stop asking questions. You're putting too much social pressure on her. Whereas if you asked her "Hey, what kind of music do you like... because I like blah blah blah"... guaranteed you will get a more in-depth response from her, because you've been in more effort and she will want to re-pay that. Go try it out.  On December 28 2009 12:57 resonance wrote: Honestly, I knew there was no relationship there, but I just did it cuz I figured why not. "mkkk well, im happy we cleared this up" blah blah blah.. What the fuck. Who does that seriously. At least I saved myself time and didn't bother going skating. Basically, you were way too reactive. Being reactive is not a trait of a confident dude. Your behavior was geared towards you guys already being in a relationship, instead of two people about to go on a first date. You put way too much social pressure on her to decide if you guys were going as friends or a potential relationship, instead of just going on the date, seeing how it went, and deciding if you wanted to go on a second one (how dating should work). So, where do you go from here? Well first, obviously, you need to get out into the dating scene more. That way, you can make improvements and you won't fuck up little things so much. Many different approaches to this, do whatever you feel like. Second, you could read "A New Earth" or "The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle. Get the audio books if you aren't much of a reader. These help a lot on the topic of the "ego" and how to just chill out and enjoy life moment by moment, instead of being concerned with events that are in the future (which causes anxiety -> you fucking it up). If you need further explanation or have questions, don't hesitate. I can definitely expand and go deeper on everything. -Aksion | ||
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obesechicken13
United States10467 Posts
Ok. I go play sc. What the puck? I thought u quit. I stopped playing everything for 1.5-2 months at least october somethingeth after reading your blog. I'm ashamed of you -_- I can't even look at you right now (nor could I ever, I guess). Hey guys, I guess it's true... It really is impossible to quit starcraft. | ||
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GGTeMpLaR
United States7226 Posts
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2on2
United States142 Posts
Dont feel bad dude, I had the same thing happen to me with a co-worker. shes really cute and asked me out one day, i dicked around and gave ALL the wrong replies and never got to spend a moment with her. Play the numbers game and ask every girl out, make it a game and try Bo3 everyday These help a lot on the topic of the "ego" and how to just chill out and enjoy life moment by moment, instead of being concerned with events that are in the future (which causes anxiety -> you fucking it up). Thats really good advice, perfectly describes my flaw | ||
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Kennelie
United States2296 Posts
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Warrior Madness
Canada3791 Posts
If you LOOKED at her in a very friendly, platonic way, and talked to her about friendly, platonic topics from the very first time you met and onwards, then what do you expect? Even when I'm talking with my close friends (girls, mostly  ) I always put in just a little whiff of sexual energy in our conversations by adjusting my body language (From time to time I'll look deeply into one of their eyes, talk a little slower than usual, and look at their lips) and by talking openly about sex. With coworkers it's always iffy, and I actually recommend against it if you're not too experienced with flirting with women. I always insinuate sexual things if she relates to something I say but in a work place this can go horribly wrong if your bodylanguage is a little creepy. My old boss is really creepy for instance, and he told me one time that he commented on a girls hair one day and she took it the wrong way and he got this long lecture by his boss on what's appropriate and not. So for chicks at work, once I've established some sort of mutual connection I always just say something more tame, but redirect it none the less. "You know, if we weren't coworkers, I would've asked you on a date a long time ago, but I don't want us to get in any trouble." And that, doesn't even take a day to do. But from the very beginning you establish what you want, and you present yourself as a potential mate. Anyways, that aside, I think 1) You didn't lead from the start 2) You reacted awkwardly. I think the fact that she had to offer to go out, first of all, after all these months showed a lack of a back bone on your part. Second of all, even through merely reading your story I get the feeling that you came off as needy when she offered to go out. It sounds like she was kind of interested in you but the tone of your responses put SOOOO much pressure on her. Not good. Also, even if she's the one to react awkwardly, you should never react to her reaction. Always be calm, and non-needy. Don't overplan things (Like picturing her as your girlfriend). If she's being weird, or bitchy, call her out on it but never have the mentality that it's because something's wrong with YOU. Anyways, not much to salvage from this other than a learning experience. | ||
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M-buster
Honduras8 Posts
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stalife
Canada1222 Posts
Asian + hardcore christian = drama | ||
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MisteR
Netherlands595 Posts
Most is just bs though. There's only one thing in this story, and that is a lesson learned. Going medieval on his mistakes is not the way to advice someone. What happened here? Guy gets some chemistry going with a girl, decides he wants to act on it, finds out the girl already acts, but in the end she acted with a different intention. Sure he could've done this smoother, but so could the girl. The end result would've been the same though, I'm sure of that. | ||
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