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Active: 658 users

Why is my Dad an ASSHOLE?! - Page 3

Blogs > zoLo
Post a Reply
Prev 1 2 3 4 Next All
UFO
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
582 Posts
October 13 2009 22:00 GMT
#41
Eventtemples.com , ebook "Living from the heart" - this might be insanely helpful.
KlaCkoN
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
Sweden1661 Posts
October 13 2009 22:01 GMT
#42
On October 14 2009 05:04 Track wrote:
Talking about superman punching your dad? Stabbing him? Are you thirteen years old? You should probably try to mature a bit and evaluate your situation more objectively, whining about it isn't going to do you any good.

Usually I'm sympathetic to things like this, but you're just whining and moaning. Your parents bug you about school? Your dad disciplines you physically? "He even talked in that faggot tone how if I wanted to go to a far away college, I had to do it by myself because he won’t support me. So that means I have to take a bunch of loans." You are going to... take out LOANS!? The horror!!

Grow up. Maybe you should read some of the blogs of the people here who have actual fucking problems. Daddy not wanting to fund your school so you have to take out loans doesn't qualify as a problem.

Ones father beeing crazy enough to pull a knife on ones mother just might though?
"Voice or no voice the people can always be brought to the bidding of their leaders ... All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger."
Tsagacity
Profile Blog Joined August 2005
United States2124 Posts
October 13 2009 22:06 GMT
#43
On October 14 2009 06:49 AzureEye wrote:
Actually going to Community College, and then transferring to a good school is perfectly viable and good method of saving money.

But if you really hate your dad and stuff, just get a loan and go to a good school that you deserve. Therefore, you can get away from your parents and stuff too.
Yep. I wish I had done that. Spent so much money on 2 years of pretty pointless classes before I got to the good stuff
"Everyone worse than me at video games is a noob. Everyone better than me doesn't have a life."
Ingenol
Profile Blog Joined November 2008
United States1328 Posts
October 13 2009 22:29 GMT
#44
This sounds almost exactly like what my Vietnamese ex-girlfriend thinks of her father.
selboN
Profile Blog Joined January 2008
United States2523 Posts
October 13 2009 22:36 GMT
#45
I'm not entirely sure how the scholarship system works where you are. But in Texas, I use www.applytexas.org and fill out all the scholarships I can. That, along with financial aid I was able to go to school for free and get 7,000 dollars back a semester as a refund. I used that for my apartment/food and also got some hefty goodies. Sounds like you've busted your ass through school and you're getting the short end of the stick. Get in touch with the councilors at your school and ask them how to apply for scholarships. They should have many that you can fill out. Fill out all that you can, apply to the schools you want to go and when the money comes in you'll be in a good shape.
"That's what happens when you're using a mouse made out of glass!" -Tasteless (Referring to ZergBong)
DragonSharp
Profile Joined October 2009
United States85 Posts
October 13 2009 23:41 GMT
#46
Hey long time lurker here so I might as well help you out here.


Now, I'm a Vietnamese American as you are (less not get to that argument since thats what we aren't talking about), and I'm in the about the exact same situation as you are. I'm also in my 2nd year of community college and my dad is an asshole as well due to being working way too much and other stuff. However, I found that your dad is even more of an asshole than mines' which I feel sorry for you (details about my father won't matter much here). But the thing is, you are close to finishing your time in that community college and be off to another university where your pressures from your dad will be off a lot. You're better off with this option because not only you seem bright (which I'm assuming you spent a lot of time in your APs and SATs) but also you will experience the amount of freedom you will have there. I went to a tour to one of UCs schools with my friend showing around the places and what he does for this type of living, and I have to say, it's one of the best possible feelings to live in environment where no restrictions can be from your parents ( although I might exaggerate this a bit but you get the point).

IMO, military isn't the best choice, even though I have thoughts of joining too during my high school years, because why put yourself more into in a messy situation where joining a 4 year-university can alleviate some of your troubles off. As you stated before, you will be far away from your house where you won't face your dad a lot. But thats just me because I have enough living my dad for God knows long I suffered from him, and I don't feel like going to the military a bit. But if you must for financial aid, join the ROTC of that university. Some universities might not have the Air Force ROTC that you might look for but at least you can be in both places at the same time and place.


Hopefully this can help you, and sorry if there is something wrong with this cause I'm not the best when it comes to English.

But one thing I want to point out that you are almost finish with college. All you need to do is complete your second year, transfer, complete the rest of the years in a 4-year university, and get that degree.

Just survive a few more years and you will be in control.
SayaSP
Profile Blog Joined February 2007
Laos5494 Posts
October 13 2009 23:49 GMT
#47
Hey dude, I'm went through the same thing when I got out of HS. They told me to go to CC too lol. I still think I shoulda went right out of HS. But whatever. I'm almost done :V
[iHs]SSP | I-NO-KI BOM-BA-YE | のヮの http://tinyurl.com/MLIStheCV , MLIS.
Kurosaki
Profile Joined August 2008
United States158 Posts
October 14 2009 00:14 GMT
#48
On October 14 2009 06:28 redtooth wrote:
Show nested quote +
On October 14 2009 06:15 Kurosaki wrote:
My dad was a POW and was sent to live in what seems to be an outhouse with 4 other guys for 7 years. Seriously, you have a great life if thats your only family problem.
this made absolutely no sense. okay the OP may not have the worst life in the world but how does he have a "great life"? its nothing to be absolutely emo over but he definitely does not have a "great life", especially when it comes to his relationship with his father. and it definitely doesn't have anything to do with your father.

His dad and my dad are one the same. Only difference is that my dad is a heavy drinker. I'm Viet so yes I understand. Only difference is that I know how great my life really is. Just look at him. His parent makes double what mine makes. OP only mentioned problems with his dad. I have problems with my dad, sister, and brother.

Why am I so optimistic?

Because I haven't witness real life-changing event that can really fuck me over. I'm healthy, no financial burden, and nothing charged against me. Nothing catastrophic which I find is great.

His situation isn't rare. Hell, I have friends whose siblings have schizophrenia and bi-polar. Compare to what I've seen, his family is normal. Great even. He just doesn't know it.
DivinO
Profile Blog Joined July 2009
United States4796 Posts
October 14 2009 03:04 GMT
#49
My dad is also somewhat unreasonable. Physical violence was a constant in my house until I was 13.
LiquipediaBrain in my filth.
iNcontroL *
Profile Blog Joined July 2004
USA29055 Posts
October 14 2009 03:06 GMT
#50
uh >_<

What happened at 13? Btw sorry to hear this
Cambium
Profile Blog Joined June 2004
United States16368 Posts
October 14 2009 03:17 GMT
#51
i think most of Asian dads are the same... My dad was/is pretty bad at parenting (minus physical violence, and cheating on my mother), and would still occasionally yell at me whenever I come home and visit even though I moved out four years ago.
When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.
weaksauce
Profile Blog Joined March 2007
369 Posts
Last Edited: 2009-10-14 12:48:00
October 14 2009 12:43 GMT
#52
So many people here are so used to jumping on the people that post these kinda blogs about how easy they have it

I would definitely try to find a job and move in with a friend. The UC/CSU would give the most aide to you if you lived alone (basing it off household income), but i know its not too viable here in the bay.

Hang in there, he'll get his in the end when he's alone, old, and senile.
even if he DID detect penis - cubEdin
QuoC
Profile Blog Joined August 2008
United States724 Posts
October 15 2009 01:58 GMT
#53
where u from?
Dario "TLO" Wünsch -- Favorite SC2 Player
ph33r
Profile Joined June 2007
Canada58 Posts
October 15 2009 02:21 GMT
#54
On October 14 2009 09:14 Kurosaki wrote:
Show nested quote +
On October 14 2009 06:28 redtooth wrote:
On October 14 2009 06:15 Kurosaki wrote:
My dad was a POW and was sent to live in what seems to be an outhouse with 4 other guys for 7 years. Seriously, you have a great life if thats your only family problem.
this made absolutely no sense. okay the OP may not have the worst life in the world but how does he have a "great life"? its nothing to be absolutely emo over but he definitely does not have a "great life", especially when it comes to his relationship with his father. and it definitely doesn't have anything to do with your father.

His dad and my dad are one the same. Only difference is that my dad is a heavy drinker. I'm Viet so yes I understand. Only difference is that I know how great my life really is. Just look at him. His parent makes double what mine makes. OP only mentioned problems with his dad. I have problems with my dad, sister, and brother.

Why am I so optimistic?

Because I haven't witness real life-changing event that can really fuck me over. I'm healthy, no financial burden, and nothing charged against me. Nothing catastrophic which I find is great.

His situation isn't rare. Hell, I have friends whose siblings have schizophrenia and bi-polar. Compare to what I've seen, his family is normal. Great even. He just doesn't know it.


You can't say other people have "great lives" just cause nothing catastrophic happens. It's not that easy to understand people's troubles no matter how similar your situations may seem to be.
zoLo
Profile Blog Joined June 2007
United States5896 Posts
October 15 2009 04:24 GMT
#55
Hey guys, thanks for all the helpful posts (some of them). But yeah, I already have my goals set and I plan on following it. I decided to not go the military route since I already finished 1 year at CC and I'll probably end up missing most of my friends.

I just need to find a part time job, but it's hard since I apply to a lot of places and I get interviews, but I never get a call back even if I call them about my status. I still have time because I plan on moving out once I transfer to SJSU (if I have a job by then), so that gives me a lot of time to job hunt.

As for my dad, I plan on writing a letter to him (since I can't talk to him in person because he's stubborn) when I move out the house and I'll use what I wrote in my 1st post (revised of course since I can't write in my native language that well) in the letter, but with extra things that always bugged me.
GTR
Profile Blog Joined September 2004
51446 Posts
October 15 2009 04:39 GMT
#56
On October 14 2009 05:17 keV. wrote:
Anyone else have completely reasonable parents?

My dad is a little daddish, but he has only lost his mind very few times, and I think everyone is entitled to that once in a great while. Anyone ever try telling their crazy ass parents that they are being batshit insane?


even though i'm asian my parents always accept what i want to do. they don't have any second thoughts on my objectives and ideals.

weird eh.
Commentator
zoLo
Profile Blog Joined June 2007
United States5896 Posts
October 15 2009 04:49 GMT
#57
On October 15 2009 13:39 GTR wrote:
Show nested quote +
On October 14 2009 05:17 keV. wrote:
Anyone else have completely reasonable parents?

My dad is a little daddish, but he has only lost his mind very few times, and I think everyone is entitled to that once in a great while. Anyone ever try telling their crazy ass parents that they are being batshit insane?


even though i'm asian my parents always accept what i want to do. they don't have any second thoughts on my objectives and ideals.

weird eh.


You should be happy lol. It's pretty rare to see understandable Asian parents (usually the ones not born in the Asian country are )
Vivi57
Profile Blog Joined September 2007
United States6599 Posts
October 15 2009 07:28 GMT
#58
On October 14 2009 06:53 intrigue wrote:
Show nested quote +
On October 14 2009 05:21 T.O.P. wrote:All the rest about negativity and you being "worthless" is pretty standard asian stuff. You don't understand it cause you think like a American.

how can anyone understand it? it is unjustifiable across the board. have you seen what it's done to kids? i'm not talking about the extreme cases on the news, but the masses of otherwise nondescript asian kids who have to go through the system with no confidence, huge inferiority complexes, and unconscious self-loathing. it's sick.

intrigue nailed the heart of the problem here. This is exactly what you're stuck in and you don't have the courage to stand up to your dad directly. Why else would you send him a letter after you move out? (this is perfectly understandable, very few people would be able to do that to his face)

Your dad definitely sounds worse than most, especially the partying. I wonder what your dad feels here. Does he feel trapped and obligated to your family? I could ramble a while here, but I don't really feel like writing a bunch of barely connected thoughts (I'm tired now).


Back to the first idea, what are the ways for someone to feel liberated from the self esteem crushing asian upbringing? Unless the letter creates some amazing discussion, zolo will probably still feel the effects of it alot. *can* anyone actually escape from that feeling or is the natural course of that to go on as an adult feeling that way and doing stupid crap like his dad to assert superiority?

sorry if everything after the first paragraph is incoherent, I'm just sitting here typing as things come to my mind
Flash hwaiting! Nal_rA forever!
OhThatDang
Profile Joined August 2004
United States4685 Posts
October 15 2009 10:59 GMT
#59
if it matters
im vietnamese and this shit doesnt happen to me at all
i understand where you could get the race hating though
sometimes i dont like vietnamese people either cause they always got something to say
but thats HAS to be with every language too right? so lay off on that
everyone talks mad shit
you just understand that one language thats all

on behalf of your dad, hes a dick
my uncle is the same he cheated on my aunt and went back to vietnam
he found a wife there and wouldnt divorce my aunt and then eventually went back to my aunt after his new girlfriend ditched him.
troi oi thang map nai!!!
toastybunz
Profile Joined May 2009
United States47 Posts
October 15 2009 14:54 GMT
#60
leach him for his money, then gtfo. gl hf
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