Ludicrously Unbalanced Maps - Page 4

On May 22 2008 00:49 d.arkive wrote:
Primeval Isles. Epic map. Epic battles.

On May 22 2008 01:08 katona wrote:

oh god please don't remind me.

The first time I played SC with another human being was a 2v2 on Primeval Isles. We all had like 40APM. I was terran, my team mate was terran, my opponents were terran and zerg. The game went something like this:

me: "lol i remember dis stuff i used to use protoss and build a lot of dark archons and maelstrom when the comp tries to nuke me. nukes are so OP"
me: "lol i love mass siege tanks best strategy ever" (by mass at the time i meant like 10)
me: "lol wat i don't remember this game at all.. umm how do i tech to siege tanks?"
zerg: "get vespene and factory and stuff"
me: "k"
terran ally: "lol yeah me too"
terran opponent: "nukes are really good LOLOLOL"
*10 minutes later i realize that it's an island map as i'm starting to run low on minerals
me: "WTF ITS AN ISLAND MAP"
zerg: "ya duh"
me: "fuk"
*i'm frantically building a starport and a command center
*15 minutes in or so i get comsat. I scan randomly and see a zerg expo base
me: lol i found ur extra base dude
zerg: lol which one
me: wat
*20 minutes in i send a dropship with two siege tanks over to said base and it gets annihilated by a mass of mutas and spore colonies
me: wtf dude how did u get dat much zergs
zerg: lol idk
me: k
terran opponent: so wait how do you build nukes again? i forgot
terran ally: uhhhhh i think you have to get armory
me: no it's science facility
terran opponent: oh okay
*30 minutes in i'm looking at my expansion base and then suddenly "Your forces are under attack"
me: wat
*i look back at my base and something like 24 guardians and 24 devourers and 12 ovies are floating over my base. my antiair consists of 1 valk, 3 missile turrets, 5 marines, 1 goli, something like that.
me: HOLY SHIT LOOK AT MY BASE WTF HOW THE HELL DID YOU DO THAT
zerg: lol i have like all the bases on the map
me: o
zerg: lol
me: omfg guardians imba
zerg: lol zerg is rly good yah
me: omfg gay
zerg: lol

In my quest to beat this Zerg player I found boxer replays.

On May 22 2008 01:08 katona wrote:

oh god please don't remind me.

The first time I played SC with another human being was a 2v2 on Primeval Isles. We all had like 40APM. I was terran, my team mate was terran, my opponents were terran and zerg. The game went something like this:

me: "lol i remember dis stuff i used to use protoss and build a lot of dark archons and maelstrom when the comp tries to nuke me. nukes are so OP"
me: "lol i love mass siege tanks best strategy ever" (by mass at the time i meant like 10)
me: "lol wat i don't remember this game at all.. umm how do i tech to siege tanks?"
zerg: "get vespene and factory and stuff"
me: "k"
terran ally: "lol yeah me too"
terran opponent: "nukes are really good LOLOLOL"
*10 minutes later i realize that it's an island map as i'm starting to run low on minerals
me: "WTF ITS AN ISLAND MAP"
zerg: "ya duh"
me: "fuk"
*i'm frantically building a starport and a command center
*15 minutes in or so i get comsat. I scan randomly and see a zerg expo base
me: lol i found ur extra base dude
zerg: lol which one
me: wat
*20 minutes in i send a dropship with two siege tanks over to said base and it gets annihilated by a mass of mutas and spore colonies
me: wtf dude how did u get dat much zergs
zerg: lol idk
me: k
terran opponent: so wait how do you build nukes again? i forgot
terran ally: uhhhhh i think you have to get armory
me: no it's science facility
terran opponent: oh okay
*30 minutes in i'm looking at my expansion base and then suddenly "Your forces are under attack"
me: wat
*i look back at my base and something like 24 guardians and 24 devourers and 12 ovies are floating over my base. my antiair consists of 1 valk, 3 missile turrets, 5 marines, 1 goli, something like that.
me: HOLY SHIT LOOK AT MY BASE WTF HOW THE HELL DID YOU DO THAT
zerg: lol i have like all the bases on the map
me: o
zerg: lol
me: omfg guardians imba
zerg: lol zerg is rly good yah
me: omfg gay
zerg: lol

In my quest to beat this Zerg player I found boxer replays.

On May 21 2008 10:28 Kau wrote:
Someone take a screenshot of (6)Crazy Critters and (2)Crystallis.

On May 21 2008 21:42 PobTheCad wrote:

I've played this guy on west a couple of times recently who did this on a rigged version of Luna.
He goes T and you either have to go P or Z or he leaves the game.
All his buildings and units were free and his marines did 9 damage instead of 6.
Also he was fucking awful lol , went mass valks as a counter to my carriers when he had 3/3 metal but i guess when you have free units it doesn't matter? lol

On May 22 2008 08:48 Kacas wrote:
oh tgod
friends
nostalgic

On May 22 2008 09:29 ScarFace wrote:
crystalis would be reaver or seige tank pwnage lol

On May 22 2008 10:00 Djabanete wrote:
I just played a game on Killing Fields. I won't bother with an image but just imagine a 256x256 8-player land map with expos all over the place. This was a "1v1 Noobs" game. (I'm a noob, having switched fairly recently from UMS.)

me: wow, never played this map
DeluxeNoobie: yeah i don't like getting rushed

I went CC first since I figured I was in no immediate danger, and proceeded to send out about 3 scouting SCV's and a floating barracks in an attempt to understand the geography and find my opponent. It turned out that he'd started in the position adjacent to mine. With my double gas I managed to produce a good-sized army of gols and tanks (he was massing wraiths) and a couple dropships and plunked my whole army on the high ground separating our mains.

DeluxeNoobie: you're not a noobie
me: am so
DeluxeNoobie: no you're a noobie hunter
DeluxeNoobie: you have maphack on
DeluxeNoobie: you can see the whole map
[at this point I had 5 goliaths, 3 wraiths, a barracks and an engineering bay scouting around the map; but it didn't matter because he hadn't even expanded.]

me: no i am a noob also
me: just less of a noob than you
DeluxeNoobie: fuck you noobie rapist
DeluxeNoobie: i am going to put you on my whore list

Then he nuked one of my 5 expansions and disconnected.

On May 22 2008 11:28 Jyvblamo wrote:


Noob rapist.