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Beating Kids? - Page 20

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Proposal
Profile Joined December 2007
United States1310 Posts
December 29 2008 02:51 GMT
#381
I think we mostly talk about our parents and how they raised us.
CharlieMurphy
Profile Blog Joined March 2006
United States22895 Posts
December 29 2008 03:42 GMT
#382
On December 29 2008 11:51 Proposal wrote:
I think we mostly talk about our parents and how they raised us.

Which is completely biased. I have actually baby sat 2-6 year olds before and sometimes they just need a smack when timeout and other shit doesn't work.
..and then I would, ya know, check em'. (Aka SpoR)
ParasitJonte
Profile Joined September 2004
Sweden1768 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-12-29 16:12:53
December 29 2008 16:12 GMT
#383
On December 28 2008 19:56 ParasitJonte wrote:
"Well, at first you should try to study, but if that doesn't work just cheat."

The inherent badness of spanking is presupposed in making this analogy.


That's a valid point. However, you use the word "spanking" whereas I would prefer that we simply stick to physical violence. And yes, I think physical violence has an inherent badness.
Hello=)
TheFoReveRwaR
Profile Blog Joined May 2006
United States10657 Posts
December 29 2008 17:25 GMT
#384
On December 29 2008 12:42 CharlieMurphy wrote:
Show nested quote +
On December 29 2008 11:51 Proposal wrote:
I think we mostly talk about our parents and how they raised us.

Which is completely biased. I have actually baby sat 2-6 year olds before and sometimes they just need a smack when timeout and other shit doesn't work.

The fact that you babysit is disturbing.
Being healthy, it has been said, really consists of having the same disease as everybody else.
EmeraldSparks
Profile Blog Joined January 2008
United States1451 Posts
December 29 2008 17:29 GMT
#385
On December 29 2008 07:47 BlackStar wrote:
Anecdotal evidence is an oxymoron.

Wrong.
But why?
unknown.sam
Profile Joined May 2007
Philippines2701 Posts
December 29 2008 17:31 GMT
#386
i don't have a problem w/ giving kids a little smack (assuming the parents or direct family members are the ones who do it) if it means disciplining the kid. but babysitting/parenting the child w/o having to use such methods is very possible.
"Thanks for the kind words, but if SS is the most interesting book you've ever read, you must have just started reading a couple of weeks ago." - Mark Rippetoe
vAltyR
Profile Blog Joined July 2008
United States581 Posts
December 30 2008 16:44 GMT
#387
IMO, physical discipline is a "last resort" sort of thing. Sure, it *is* possible to raise a successful child without resorting to physical discipline, but not all of us were angels as kids. I certainly wasn't. I was spanked all of once time. After that, just knowing it could happen again was enough to keep me in line. I don't really think of myself as spineless, or a coward, though. I just didn't like the experience and had no wish to go through it again.

Obviously, as with everything, moderation is key. If the first thing you do when a kid does something wrong is spanking, then you're doing something wrong.
내 호버크라프트는 장어로 가득 차 있어요
XaI)CyRiC
Profile Joined October 2002
United States4471 Posts
Last Edited: 2008-12-30 19:22:47
December 30 2008 19:16 GMT
#388
I can only speak to my personal experiences and the only conclusion I can come to from that is that physical discipline is not the way to go. Physical discipline is the quick and easy solution, and a very temporary one at that. Non-physical discipline is more difficult to pull off (at least with troublesome children, who are the only ones that I hope this discussion applies to), but it works much better as a long-term solution. I've seen physical discipline go very wrong in many situations, where it only distances the child from the parent(s) and doesn't even lead to good behavior.

I'm not saying that the occasional spank (note, not spanking, i.e. extended session) or slap on the hand is out of line (although I would never recommend either), but anything beyond that is completely unnecessary in my eyes. Once a child is old enough to converse with, there is even less justification for physical discipline as explanation and teaching becomes entirely possible and appropriate. At that point you explain why something is bad, beyond the reason that it will lead to getting hit.

Again, this is just my opinion based upon my personal experiences and what I've seen or heard of others' experiences. I'm certainly not going to pretend I understand the difficulties involved in parenting, I appreciate that it's the most difficult and important job most adults will ever have. However, because of that, I think it's important for people to look beyond what works argument, and think about what works best. Both physical and non-physical discipline can be effective, but I think we can all agree that non-physical is preferable so long as it works. As such, I don't think any parent should ever go in with physical discipline as their chosen method before seriously attempting non-physical discipline to the best of their abilities. Any good parent would loathe the idea of inflicting pain upon a child, so why do so unnecessarily?

P.S. My parents never resorted to physical discipline (closest was my dad slamming his hand on the table to scare us and let us know we were stepping out of line), and both my brother and I grew up very aware of what was right and wrong, and never got into any serious trouble. My parents taught us what was right and wrong while we were growing up, through words and by example, and my brother and I appreciated and loved my parents enough to respect them and not do things that would upset or disappoint them. Not saying that this confirms that there is no justification for physical discipline, but I thought I'd provide at least one more example of non-physical discipline being very effective. I firmly believe that loving and attentive parents who take the time to teach their kids will never need to resort to physical discipline, and will always get better results than those who do use it. Physical discipline is often (not always) used to compensate for a lack of care or attention.
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