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20 Worst games of All time

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BigBalls
Profile Blog Joined May 2003
United States5354 Posts
July 29 2005 12:28 GMT
#1
Seeing IGN's list made me think about the worst games of all time. I did a little google search and found this.


http://www.seanbaby.com/nes/egm.htm

This guy is a hilarious writer. Read through these games, they are ridiculously bad, and this guy's insulting comments made me laugh for a long time.
if you guys could use google and post direct links to the maphacks here it would be greatly appreciated. - Nazgul
rpf289
Profile Joined October 2004
United States3524 Posts
Last Edited: 2005-07-29 12:36:54
July 29 2005 12:30 GMT
#2
ROFL I've read one paragraph, and I love this.

Edit: "E.T. can make you press the power button on his game, but the power button to his heart... that was inside you the whole time. "

It's from: http://www.seanbaby.com/nes/egm01.htm
ManOfManly
Profile Joined July 2005
United States49 Posts
July 29 2005 12:48 GMT
#3
Total Annihilation is maybe the worst game ever made.
Catyoul *
Profile Joined April 2004
France2377 Posts
Last Edited: 2005-07-29 13:04:31
July 29 2005 13:01 GMT
#4
Total Annihilation is close behind Starcraft one of the very best RTS ever made.

edit : great list btw
Bill307
Profile Blog Joined October 2002
Canada9103 Posts
July 29 2005 13:15 GMT
#5
I disagree with his list: it does not include Bokosuka Wars .

http://www.somethingawful.com/articles.php?a=13
tfeign
Profile Joined June 2004
United States2980 Posts
July 29 2005 13:33 GMT
#6
I thought Bad Street Brawler was a pretty fun game. One of my favorites back when I still had my NES.
RiSE
Profile Joined April 2004
United States3182 Posts
July 29 2005 13:38 GMT
#7
Hahaha. nice
heavy hand upon the land, feel it's weight inside you
neSix
Profile Blog Joined November 2004
United States1772 Posts
July 29 2005 14:02 GMT
#8
ive never played any of these games, but fuck, rofl:

#20:
This bullshit must have been designed for the blind, because they're the only ones who won't notice that someone just painted the snow blue and renamed it "kayaking."


reminds me of maddox
Smurg
Profile Blog Joined November 2004
Australia3818 Posts
July 29 2005 14:11 GMT
#9
I thought you were talking about Starcraft games.

I would have been in all 20 of them.
SA-kcabsiozteh
Profile Joined July 2004
United States396 Posts
July 29 2005 14:45 GMT
#10
LMAO THIS LIST PWNZ

hilarious!
PanoRaMa
Profile Blog Joined June 2003
United States5069 Posts
July 29 2005 15:21 GMT
#11
ahahhaha VERY nice find. Anyone know when he wrote this? Hilarious stuff
OhThatDang
Profile Joined August 2004
United States4685 Posts
July 29 2005 15:24 GMT
#12
the bible story game was hard and ruled i dont agree! but rest =[
troi oi thang map nai!!!
Bill307
Profile Blog Joined October 2002
Canada9103 Posts
July 29 2005 15:25 GMT
#13
#1: ET, The Extra Terrestrial (2600)

This game was so bad it actually destroyed the life of the Atari 2600. The Atari 2600 had a game where General Custer raped Indians tied to cactuses, and THAT couldn't kill the system.


Haha. When I first read this, I thought he was just joking with the General Custer raping Indians remark . But then I saw this:

http://www.seanbaby.com/nes/egm09.htm
Az)Natic_cn
Profile Joined August 2004
Canada439 Posts
July 29 2005 16:03 GMT
#14
shaq fu madafaka .... i have that game =[
What
Yizuo
Profile Joined December 2004
Germany1537 Posts
July 29 2005 16:48 GMT
#15
Haha, i was in Bulgaria this year, and in my hotel there were actually some game-consoles, including 'Metal Slug' and the named 'Revolution X'. I played this, and it just rocked! There were no controls, just a gun and you basically had to shoot all the time.
It was so intense that I forgot to blink and one of my contact lenses dropped out of my eye -_-
Chris307
Profile Joined June 2004
3095 Posts
July 29 2005 18:09 GMT
#16
On July 30 2005 00:25 Bill307 wrote:
Show nested quote +
#1: ET, The Extra Terrestrial (2600)

This game was so bad it actually destroyed the life of the Atari 2600. The Atari 2600 had a game where General Custer raped Indians tied to cactuses, and THAT couldn't kill the system.


Haha. When I first read this, I thought he was just joking with the General Custer raping Indians remark . But then I saw this:

http://www.seanbaby.com/nes/egm09.htm


OHHH GOD

HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
PUSH DICE CUP BACK AND I SHOOT CRAP
SoLaR[i.C]
Profile Blog Joined August 2003
United States2969 Posts
July 29 2005 18:32 GMT
#17
This list is way fucking better than IGN's top 100.
Klogon
Profile Blog Joined November 2002
MURICA15980 Posts
July 29 2005 18:48 GMT
#18
Wow that game about Custer... hahaha
Liquid`Jinro
Profile Blog Joined September 2002
Sweden33719 Posts
July 29 2005 18:57 GMT
#19
On July 29 2005 21:48 ManOfManly wrote:
Total Annihilation is maybe the worst game ever made.

Lol.

If you are talking about Total Annihilation kingdoms I can forgive you, if it's regular TA you don't know what you are talking about xD

TA is still being modded/played by people actually o_O Pretty long lived game.
Moderatortell the guy that interplanatar interaction is pivotal to terrans variety of optionitudals in the pre-midgame preperatories as well as the protosstinal deterriggation of elite zergling strikes - Stimey n | Formerly FrozenArbiter
enkera~
Profile Joined May 2005
Venezuela725 Posts
July 29 2005 19:52 GMT
#20
Calling this game "extreme" is like calling this game "crappy


Lol, fucking hilarous. Gold!
If I go back to Seoul practice hard so no one can beat me, and for sure I will dedicate all those winnings and honors to my father, Im going back, dont worry, Im going back to the real nada, so remember I will take care of my family dad.. -NaDa
GoGoGo[cF]
Profile Joined September 2004
China545 Posts
July 29 2005 20:22 GMT
#21
ROFL!!!!!!!! I don't think I've laughed like that in a while!!!!
aka: sbOy[1FaM] ---Retired Gaming---
bloodcanadiaN
Profile Joined April 2005
Canada114 Posts
July 29 2005 21:36 GMT
#22
7: Superman 64
rofl I remember when I played it and it sucks! :o) btw i'm a fan of Zelda and I never heard of Legend of Zelda: Wand of Gamelon.
Ack1027
Profile Blog Joined January 2004
United States7873 Posts
July 29 2005 21:39 GMT
#23
On July 29 2005 21:48 ManOfManly wrote:
Total Annihilation is maybe the worst game ever made.


Guilliame Patry plays TA so you don't know what the hell you're talking about.
Ghin
Profile Blog Joined January 2005
United States2391 Posts
July 29 2005 21:58 GMT
#24
Where's Legend of Kage? And Shaq Fu?
Legalize drugs and murder.
St0rmRush
Profile Joined February 2003
Brazil448 Posts
July 29 2005 23:07 GMT
#25
So Fucking hilarious!!! Gold!!!
IntoTheWow
Profile Blog Joined May 2004
is awesome32277 Posts
July 29 2005 23:13 GMT
#26
On July 30 2005 06:39 Ack1027 wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 29 2005 21:48 ManOfManly wrote:
Total Annihilation is maybe the worst game ever made.


Guilliame Patry plays TA so you don't know what the hell you're talking about.


Its geiyom poetry 8according to a recent suscriber to tl.net)
Moderator<:3-/-<
Stat.Quo
Profile Joined October 2004
Canada540 Posts
July 29 2005 23:22 GMT
#27
"This game is so boring it wouldn't be fun if you were somehow playing it while bungee jumping into a Chuck E. Cheese's full of nude ninja girls fighting the Predator."
Canadians dont have time to be prejudice, they are too busy playing hockey, and getting drunk, or putting maple syrup on their ham - Kelso
NettleS
Profile Joined April 2005
522 Posts
July 29 2005 23:27 GMT
#28
On July 30 2005 06:36 bloodcanadiaN wrote:
btw i'm a fan of Zelda and I never heard of Legend of Zelda: Wand of Gamelon.


Nintendo sold the rights to phillips (for a zelda game) for their CD games system
No-one bought said CD system
We are too scared to go with you Bluto....WELL JUST KISS MY ASS FROM NOW ON
NewbSaibot
Profile Joined May 2004
3849 Posts
July 29 2005 23:52 GMT
#29
Man i feel so sad now, my parents actually bought me ET, and it was supposed to be the highlight of my christmas, and i still have it. I was so dissapointed with it i felt bad for them and played it for hours on end pretending i was the happiest kid in the world.
I went to the chippy last night and only orderd chips because I knew I could get fish from her bushy plate.
BlueJays
Profile Joined August 2004
Canada52 Posts
July 29 2005 23:55 GMT
#30
"If you thought I was just kidding about how fruity this game is, fucking look at this screenshot:" lmao that picture is so gay lmao
Team liquidater
Profile Joined July 2005
United States92 Posts
July 30 2005 00:06 GMT
#31
i have revolution x for the sega genesis, it was fun for the first 10 minutes, then i realized the game would never end, its just the same three levels repeated each time, with faster enemies and slower cds to shoot, it wasnt worth the dollar i paid to get it from my friend.
Telling the truth is like an enema, because it may be a bad idea at first, but in the end, it all comes out.
BlueJays
Profile Joined August 2004
Canada52 Posts
July 30 2005 00:09 GMT
#32
On July 30 2005 09:06 Team liquidater wrote:
i have revolution x for the sega genesis, it was fun for the first 10 minutes, then i realized the game would never end, its just the same three levels repeated each time, with faster enemies and slower cds to shoot, it wasnt worth the dollar i paid to get it from my friend.


could be worse u could have bought a game about diabetes
KOFgokuon
Profile Blog Joined August 2004
United States14899 Posts
July 30 2005 03:48 GMT
#33
I almost commented before reading the list that if superman 64 wasn't on the list, it sucked

and it was

i'm content
Xeofreestyler
Profile Blog Joined June 2005
Belgium6774 Posts
July 30 2005 04:44 GMT
#34
On July 30 2005 08:52 NewbSaibot wrote:
Man i feel so sad now, my parents actually bought me ET, and it was supposed to be the highlight of my christmas, and i still have it. I was so dissapointed with it i felt bad for them and played it for hours on end pretending i was the happiest kid in the world.


Lol I cant stop laughing after reading that review and your last sentence ^^;
Graphics
fanta[Rn]
Profile Blog Joined October 2004
Japan2465 Posts
Last Edited: 2005-07-30 05:10:27
July 30 2005 05:08 GMT
#35
Erotic Imagery: I've masturbated to sexier Legos.


lol, Custer's Revenge must have made many guys masturbatin back then^^

Above: Superman is forced to carry a car through rings. If only I had the genius criminal mind of Lex Luthor necessary to enjoy it.; It would have been more fun if they made a game about Superman window shopping with Aquaman.


LOL man i wonder what the game makers were thinking about when they made that game
1sd2sd3sd
Profile Blog Joined November 2004
660 Posts
July 30 2005 06:45 GMT
#36
Zelda Wand of Gamelon

"Ten years ago, a group of cruel scientists kidnapped a retarded kid, blindfolded him, filled his helmet with bees, and demanded that he draw cartoons. Those cartoons were later used as The Legend of Zelda: Wand of Gamelon cutscenes."

LOL
Cambium
Profile Blog Joined June 2004
United States16368 Posts
July 30 2005 06:52 GMT
#37
On July 29 2005 21:30 rpf289 wrote:
ROFL I've read one paragraph, and I love this.

Edit: "E.T. can make you press the power button on his game, but the power button to his heart... that was inside you the whole time. "

It's from: http://www.seanbaby.com/nes/egm01.htm


Man, that was a fun read. I kept on chuckling, especially at the shovel part.
When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.
KOFgokuon
Profile Blog Joined August 2004
United States14899 Posts
July 30 2005 07:07 GMT
#38
On July 30 2005 14:08 fanta[Rn] wrote:
Show nested quote +
Erotic Imagery: I've masturbated to sexier Legos.


lol, Custer's Revenge must have made many guys masturbatin back then^^

Show nested quote +
Above: Superman is forced to carry a car through rings. If only I had the genius criminal mind of Lex Luthor necessary to enjoy it.; It would have been more fun if they made a game about Superman window shopping with Aquaman.


LOL man i wonder what the game makers were thinking about when they made that game


come on now, porn was easy go get. You'd never have to stoop THAT low

even though that girl is pretty hot
SolaR-
Profile Blog Joined February 2004
United States2685 Posts
July 30 2005 08:40 GMT
#39
i have some painful memories of huge headaches after playing superman 64
BlueJays
Profile Joined August 2004
Canada52 Posts
July 30 2005 08:56 GMT
#40
On July 30 2005 17:40 CultureMisfits wrote:
i have some painful memories of huge headaches after playing superman 64


ya same here game just pissed me off so much and the green fog made me sick once
8882
Profile Blog Joined December 2003
2718 Posts
Last Edited: 2005-07-30 08:58:31
July 30 2005 08:56 GMT
#41
On July 30 2005 06:39 Ack1027 wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 29 2005 21:48 ManOfManly wrote:
Total Annihilation is maybe the worst game ever made.


Guilliame Patry plays TA so you don't know what the hell you're talking about.


If Guilliame Patry would eat shit you would eat it too? cool

Im not saying that TA is one of the worst games
Maybe we could play it in multiplayer mode one day or something, just like wc2
I have returned
karelen
Profile Joined October 2003
Sweden2407 Posts
July 30 2005 09:00 GMT
#42
funny stuff
zzzzzz
TheDeadman
Profile Joined July 2005
Croatia5 Posts
July 30 2005 09:01 GMT
#43
all I got to say is ... HILLARIUS
I am what you are not
Frits
Profile Joined March 2003
11782 Posts
Last Edited: 2005-07-30 09:13:08
July 30 2005 09:11 GMT
#44
On July 30 2005 08:27 NettleS wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 30 2005 06:36 bloodcanadiaN wrote:
btw i'm a fan of Zelda and I never heard of Legend of Zelda: Wand of Gamelon.


Nintendo sold the rights to phillips (for a zelda game) for their CD games system
No-one bought said CD system


hahahahaha

that game had the worst artwork i've seen in my entire life, link looked like a fucking retard.

never even heard of any of those games, except for superman64 .. from which i already heard it was total crappyness.
-_-
Profile Blog Joined November 2003
United States7081 Posts
July 30 2005 09:14 GMT
#45
Out of curiousity I bought shaq fu for two dollars from funcoland. It definitely deserves a spot.
88)GuMMi
Profile Joined August 2004
Sweden720 Posts
July 30 2005 09:36 GMT
#46
On July 30 2005 06:39 Ack1027 wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 29 2005 21:48 ManOfManly wrote:
Total Annihilation is maybe the worst game ever made.


Guilliame Patry plays TA so you don't know what the hell you're talking about.


well i guess TA has to be a great game then....

unless you were kidding, hard to tell....
Puppy powaa
BigBalls
Profile Blog Joined May 2003
United States5354 Posts
July 30 2005 10:21 GMT
#47
i kind of want to buy atari 2600 now lol
if you guys could use google and post direct links to the maphacks here it would be greatly appreciated. - Nazgul
InToTheWannaB
Profile Joined September 2002
United States4770 Posts
July 30 2005 11:47 GMT
#48
omg this guys funny as fuck

"Thanks to the sloppy graphics and insane camera work, the hoop usually looks like a distant clump of Grape Nuts, so you can never tell whether you made a basket or not. The programmers seemed to know this, so to help you determine whether the ball went in, hardcore street basketball phrases appear at the top of the screen whenever you shoot. Unfortunately, the game developers must have hired 40 year old golfers at a French country club to write their hardcore street slang. When you throw up a shot, it screams nonsense like "BANGIN' UP HIGH THE HANDLE HOMEY BEEF!" Maybe that means that I made the shot or maybe it means "There is a tornado approaching the court, my friends. We should escape and your mother is a whore." I'll never know; the manual doesn't have a translation guide. So if like me, you don't come from whatever hip-hoppin' tough street that speaks this alien language, you have to try to decode "DOWN STREET ON THE FLIPFLOP TIMEPANTS!" on your own.
"
When the spirit is not altogether slain, great loss teaches men and women to desire greatly, both for themselves and for others.
ManOfManly
Profile Joined July 2005
United States49 Posts
July 31 2005 01:11 GMT
#49
On July 30 2005 17:56 8882 wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 30 2005 06:39 Ack1027 wrote:
On July 29 2005 21:48 ManOfManly wrote:
Total Annihilation is maybe the worst game ever made.


Guilliame Patry plays TA so you don't know what the hell you're talking about.


If Guilliame Patry would eat shit you would eat it too? cool

Im not saying that TA is one of the worst games
Maybe we could play it in multiplayer mode one day or something, just like wc2


Have you ever played it? First off, it is extremely slow. Second, you can make your base basically invincible, and games last forever. The whole idea of that game is to automate everything for you, so besides the slower speed it's less intense.

I haven't played TA Kingdoms, but I heard that sucked.

Also, I don't care what Guilliame did. He quit Broodwar, too, should everyone have done that?
iamke55
Profile Blog Joined April 2004
United States2806 Posts
July 31 2005 01:20 GMT
#50
Those guys obviously haven't played Big Rigs, or it would take up every spot on the list.
During practice session, I discovered very good build against zerg. -Bisu[Shield]
Bill307
Profile Blog Joined October 2002
Canada9103 Posts
July 31 2005 01:51 GMT
#51
On July 31 2005 10:20 iamke55 wrote:
Those guys obviously haven't played Big Rigs, or it would take up every spot on the list.


Nah, I think Big Rigs is differnet because to me it was essentially an incomplete game. After all, the entire game consisted of a crappy truck model with basic movement and a few bland tracks. And also an algorithm to determine when you reach the finish, a "you win" graphic, and probably a menu to let you choose between the different tracks. That's it. No collision detection, no physics, and no opponent (besides a stationary "AI" truck that could just be part of the scenery for all we know). I can't remember if it had any sound or music, either.

In contrast, these other games look like they really were intended to be complete (though possibly underfunded and/or stressed for time).
SoMuchBetter
Profile Blog Joined April 2003
Australia10606 Posts
July 31 2005 02:01 GMT
#52
TA is/was awesome, granted I haven't played it in a long time. A friend who used to play it with me still plays it somewhat regularly.
AUSSIESCUM
TeamLiquid eSTROgeneral #1 • RIP
ManOfManly
Profile Joined July 2005
United States49 Posts
July 31 2005 02:22 GMT
#53
On July 31 2005 11:01 SoMuchBetter wrote:
TA is/was awesome, granted I haven't played it in a long time. A friend who used to play it with me still plays it somewhat regularly.


When I first played that game, it was cool, but after a while (and after playing Starcraft) it's became really lame.

Another game like this is Tiberian Sun. I loved that game, and used to play it all the time. When I recently tried to play it again, I threw up. Come to think of it, that game might be worse than TA. First of all, you can only build one type of unit at a time (one vehicle, one infantry, one air unit). Second, left-click is used for everything, and it is incredibly hard when trying to play with any amount of speed (this is probably why I didn't notice it before) to tell your units to move somewhere without sliding the cursor some and cause you to draw the unit selection box, which deselects all of your units.

Ugh.
Malmis
Profile Blog Joined May 2003
Sweden1569 Posts
July 31 2005 02:40 GMT
#54
I'm missing Action 52 on that list ;d

On July 31 2005 10:51 Bill307 wrote:
In contrast, these other games look like they really were intended to be complete (though possibly underfunded and/or stressed for time).


Yeah, if we for example take E.T, Atari wanted the game to be released when the movie was premiered (or someting like that)... making the development time roughly 3 weeks ^_^
To Suport@Bethsoft.com: okay so i completed morrowind.. um, can i have my life back now?
JoeUser
Profile Joined April 2004
United States684 Posts
July 31 2005 04:33 GMT
#55
Holy shit. That was seriously one of the funniest things I have ever read. I've heard people getting lightheaded from laughing, but it's never actually happened to me until today. It's seriously a wierd feeling, you sort of loose your grip on reality, and feel like your head is floating away. Crazy.
Quote
KOFgokuon
Profile Blog Joined August 2004
United States14899 Posts
July 31 2005 04:36 GMT
#56
they should've had a section for worst use of a license ever, and definitely given that award to star trek games. 80% of them fucking SUCK
Manit0u
Profile Blog Joined August 2004
Poland17542 Posts
July 31 2005 05:40 GMT
#57
Erotic Imagery: I've masturbated to sexier Legos.

This quote gives us some basic knowledge about the writers mind...
Time is precious. Waste it wisely.
Eti307
Profile Blog Joined March 2004
Canada3442 Posts
Last Edited: 2005-07-31 06:02:47
July 31 2005 06:02 GMT
#58
hahaha nice list

edit: Where is my birthday hat!! It's my birthday today :O
Kobayashi
Profile Joined February 2003
Portugal1970 Posts
July 31 2005 06:07 GMT
#59
"Clearly, the beasts have the devil in them, and after an hour of trying to find where Satan hid my boat's second pony, I gave up. Either God gives me a god damn pony detector or He's just going to have to make some more ponies after he's done killing everybody. Lazy fuck."
I love mankind, its people I hate
PanoRaMa
Profile Blog Joined June 2003
United States5069 Posts
July 31 2005 06:20 GMT
#60
On July 31 2005 15:02 FadeToChaos wrote:
hahaha nice list

edit: Where is my birthday hat!! It's my birthday today :O


you forgot to put your birthday into your profile you miserable failure ^^
Eti307
Profile Blog Joined March 2004
Canada3442 Posts
July 31 2005 06:30 GMT
#61
oh haha thanks I tought it was with the birthday thread or something like that
baelrog
Profile Joined July 2004
Austria705 Posts
July 31 2005 06:46 GMT
#62
This game is biblically horrific. You're overthrowing an oppressive world order. With Aerosmith. And music is your weapon. That scream of terror you just heard was probably you.

rofl
i love u
iNsaNe-
Profile Joined January 2005
Finland5201 Posts
July 31 2005 06:50 GMT
#63
[image loading]


'lovely'
It takes a fool to remain sane.
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