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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.
Posts of the following nature are banned:
1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post.
2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no.
3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture.
4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.
Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. |
On August 13 2013 15:36 Metalreflux wrote:Show nested quote +On August 13 2013 15:32 Zooper31 wrote:On August 13 2013 15:30 Metalreflux wrote:
Being the OP, I have a quick update on my relationship status, I had a girlfriend for a while, and it was great, then she started doing drugs and we broke up, and she was my best friend of the past 15 years, and i'm now watching meth eat her life away. That is my luck. THE OP HAS RETURNED TO US AFTER 2 YEARS! I read this often, I just have had no need to post, I was acutally thinking of asking a mod to close this thread, but I'd hate to do that to you guys because this seems like a good place for TL'ers to vent
Some really solid advice has been dished out here too. Alot of BS aswell though I'm sure.
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On August 13 2013 15:39 Orcasgt24 wrote:Show nested quote +On August 13 2013 15:36 Metalreflux wrote:On August 13 2013 15:32 Zooper31 wrote:On August 13 2013 15:30 Metalreflux wrote:
Being the OP, I have a quick update on my relationship status, I had a girlfriend for a while, and it was great, then she started doing drugs and we broke up, and she was my best friend of the past 15 years, and i'm now watching meth eat her life away. That is my luck. THE OP HAS RETURNED TO US AFTER 2 YEARS! I read this often, I just have had no need to post, I was acutally thinking of asking a mod to close this thread, but I'd hate to do that to you guys because this seems like a good place for TL'ers to vent Some really solid advice has been dished out here too. Alot of BS aswell though I'm sure.
I can top most peoples BS but I'll talk about that another day, when I am ready to talk about it, one of which being stood up on my own birthday
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On August 13 2013 15:40 Metalreflux wrote:Show nested quote +On August 13 2013 15:39 Orcasgt24 wrote:On August 13 2013 15:36 Metalreflux wrote:On August 13 2013 15:32 Zooper31 wrote:On August 13 2013 15:30 Metalreflux wrote:
Being the OP, I have a quick update on my relationship status, I had a girlfriend for a while, and it was great, then she started doing drugs and we broke up, and she was my best friend of the past 15 years, and i'm now watching meth eat her life away. That is my luck. THE OP HAS RETURNED TO US AFTER 2 YEARS! I read this often, I just have had no need to post, I was acutally thinking of asking a mod to close this thread, but I'd hate to do that to you guys because this seems like a good place for TL'ers to vent Some really solid advice has been dished out here too. Alot of BS aswell though I'm sure. I can top most peoples BS but I'll talk about that another day, when I am ready to talk about it, one of which being stood up on my own birthday
1st of all, TL gods be praised, the OP has returned. Thankfully you didn't ask a mod to close, we'd have to start up an entirely new one  . 2nd of all, when you are ready to tell the stories, we're all ears. I'm sorry about the birthday thing, that's fuckin awful.
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On August 13 2013 14:30 Orcasgt24 wrote:
So I'm curious what TL's views are on open relationships. I really like this girl and she really likes me. We share similar views in our approach to sex. She's cheated on every BF and her ex husband, hence the past tenses. Now I am no player or anything, very little skill in womanizing but feel that sex does not equal love and that its possible to have sex for fun. And sex is such a broad thing. One person cannot possibly offer all their is sexually. She's very clearly going to benefit from this more then I will but the option for me exists to sleep with another woman(she offered to help me get better at picking chicks up too).
We had a chat about that a few days back and laid some ground rules like always wear protection, regular STD tests at the clinic. (before she used an alias since they allow that. I told her she should be using her real name and info. Medical personal deserve to know if you have something when they work on you so they may take the steps necessary to protect themselves. Got no resistance surprisingly) ALWAYS tell the other person before hand if possible (spur of the moment at a bar can happen/phones die and via text is ok because the questions from the other party may be weird) or after if you couldn't and basically just use common sense.
What are your guys views? Can open relationships work?
No.
User was warned for this post
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On August 13 2013 15:44 BisuEver wrote:Show nested quote +On August 13 2013 14:30 Orcasgt24 wrote:
So I'm curious what TL's views are on open relationships. I really like this girl and she really likes me. We share similar views in our approach to sex. She's cheated on every BF and her ex husband, hence the past tenses. Now I am no player or anything, very little skill in womanizing but feel that sex does not equal love and that its possible to have sex for fun. And sex is such a broad thing. One person cannot possibly offer all their is sexually. She's very clearly going to benefit from this more then I will but the option for me exists to sleep with another woman(she offered to help me get better at picking chicks up too).
We had a chat about that a few days back and laid some ground rules like always wear protection, regular STD tests at the clinic. (before she used an alias since they allow that. I told her she should be using her real name and info. Medical personal deserve to know if you have something when they work on you so they may take the steps necessary to protect themselves. Got no resistance surprisingly) ALWAYS tell the other person before hand if possible (spur of the moment at a bar can happen/phones die and via text is ok because the questions from the other party may be weird) or after if you couldn't and basically just use common sense.
What are your guys views? Can open relationships work? No.
That's pretty definitive . I'd say that they certainly can if you want to take an entire dimmension out of sex. A big part of sex is the intimacy of loving someone and being able to whisper in their ear things other than something sexy. Open relationships have no concept of love, they try to put that aside, but of course, someone always falls, and whoever falls, loses. I'd stay away from it if you want it to be a relationship. If you want it to be a booty call with the benefits of having her around rather than not, ok sure, but an open relationship is bound to fail.
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On August 13 2013 14:30 Orcasgt24 wrote:
So I'm curious what TL's views are on open relationships. I really like this girl and she really likes me. We share similar views in our approach to sex. She's cheated on every BF and her ex husband, hence the past tenses. Now I am no player or anything, very little skill in womanizing but feel that sex does not equal love and that its possible to have sex for fun. And sex is such a broad thing. One person cannot possibly offer all their is sexually. She's very clearly going to benefit from this more then I will but the option for me exists to sleep with another woman(she offered to help me get better at picking chicks up too).
We had a chat about that a few days back and laid some ground rules like always wear protection, regular STD tests at the clinic. (before she used an alias since they allow that. I told her she should be using her real name and info. Medical personal deserve to know if you have something when they work on you so they may take the steps necessary to protect themselves. Got no resistance surprisingly) ALWAYS tell the other person before hand if possible (spur of the moment at a bar can happen/phones die and via text is ok because the questions from the other party may be weird) or after if you couldn't and basically just use common sense.
What are your guys views? Can open relationships work?
Yes, they can and do work. I don't think that "I'm going to cheat otherwise" is the best reason to enter one.
Stuff to think about:
What happens if one person gets little or no extra sex and the other person gets a lot of it? Would you be fine with this? Would she? What if she finds someone who is much hotter, better in bed, etc than you?
Regular "just sex" has been known to evolve into feelings on many occasions. How will you deal with this if it happens?
What level of details do you want/are ok to know about the other person's sexcapades?
On August 13 2013 15:48 docvoc wrote:Show nested quote +On August 13 2013 15:44 BisuEver wrote:On August 13 2013 14:30 Orcasgt24 wrote:
So I'm curious what TL's views are on open relationships. I really like this girl and she really likes me. We share similar views in our approach to sex. She's cheated on every BF and her ex husband, hence the past tenses. Now I am no player or anything, very little skill in womanizing but feel that sex does not equal love and that its possible to have sex for fun. And sex is such a broad thing. One person cannot possibly offer all their is sexually. She's very clearly going to benefit from this more then I will but the option for me exists to sleep with another woman(she offered to help me get better at picking chicks up too).
We had a chat about that a few days back and laid some ground rules like always wear protection, regular STD tests at the clinic. (before she used an alias since they allow that. I told her she should be using her real name and info. Medical personal deserve to know if you have something when they work on you so they may take the steps necessary to protect themselves. Got no resistance surprisingly) ALWAYS tell the other person before hand if possible (spur of the moment at a bar can happen/phones die and via text is ok because the questions from the other party may be weird) or after if you couldn't and basically just use common sense.
What are your guys views? Can open relationships work? No. That's pretty definitive . I'd say that they certainly can if you want to take an entire dimmension out of sex. A big part of sex is the intimacy of loving someone and being able to whisper in their ear things other than something sexy. Open relationships have no concept of love, they try to put that aside, but of course, someone always falls, and whoever falls, loses. I'd stay away from it if you want it to be a relationship. If you want it to be a booty call with the benefits of having her around rather than not, ok sure, but an open relationship is bound to fail.
Bullshit. Open relationships have the same component of love as closed ones do. And I might as well point out that almost all closed relationships fail too, so that's something open and closed ones have in common.
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On August 13 2013 16:22 gedatsu wrote:Show nested quote +On August 13 2013 14:30 Orcasgt24 wrote:
So I'm curious what TL's views are on open relationships. I really like this girl and she really likes me. We share similar views in our approach to sex. She's cheated on every BF and her ex husband, hence the past tenses. Now I am no player or anything, very little skill in womanizing but feel that sex does not equal love and that its possible to have sex for fun. And sex is such a broad thing. One person cannot possibly offer all their is sexually. She's very clearly going to benefit from this more then I will but the option for me exists to sleep with another woman(she offered to help me get better at picking chicks up too).
We had a chat about that a few days back and laid some ground rules like always wear protection, regular STD tests at the clinic. (before she used an alias since they allow that. I told her she should be using her real name and info. Medical personal deserve to know if you have something when they work on you so they may take the steps necessary to protect themselves. Got no resistance surprisingly) ALWAYS tell the other person before hand if possible (spur of the moment at a bar can happen/phones die and via text is ok because the questions from the other party may be weird) or after if you couldn't and basically just use common sense.
What are your guys views? Can open relationships work? Yes, they can and do work. I don't think that "I'm going to cheat otherwise" is the best reason to enter one. Stuff to think about: What happens if one person gets little or no extra sex and the other person gets a lot of it? Would you be fine with this? Would she? What if she finds someone who is much hotter, better in bed, etc than you? Regular "just sex" has been known to evolve into feelings on many occasions. How will you deal with this if it happens? What level of details do you want/are ok to know about the other person's sexcapades?
I see where you are coming from and I cannot say I know the answers. Ideally I won't have to answer them but I guess it's something I should think about and if necessary talk to her preemptively about. Thankfully she's been pretty good about listening to my concerns and offering solutions or compromising.
I do know I am not entering this relationship because she will cheat otherwise. Even before I met her I had this kind of thought process. I also know I want to know what she's doing with other guys because I'm super friggin curious and depending on how descriptive she is, it could be hot and possibly improve our sex together.
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On August 13 2013 11:36 sunprince wrote:Show nested quote +On August 13 2013 08:08 Killscreen wrote:On August 13 2013 08:04 sunprince wrote:On August 13 2013 08:01 Killscreen wrote:On August 13 2013 07:55 sunprince wrote:On August 13 2013 06:29 Killscreen wrote:On August 13 2013 04:22 sunprince wrote:On August 12 2013 19:29 Killscreen wrote:On August 12 2013 08:40 sunprince wrote:On August 10 2013 23:45 BisuEver wrote:
[quote]
No, I'm saying it will be a shitty relationship. There's 2 people in 1. It's like a prisoner's dilemma thing.
Either you can be a worse person or they can be a better one. Otherwise you're both in for some shit. Your assumption here is that in any relationship, one partner rises to the level of the other and/or one partner sinks to the level of the other. You have absolutely no basis for that assumption, aside from possibly too many romance movies. There is also the assumption that having a new partner lined up before ending it with the previous one makes you a shitty person. It doesn't. It stings. Trust me I know it does, but it doesn't make her a bad person you should harbor resentment for. It makes you a shitty person if the other person is unaware that this is acceptable behavior in your relationship. And while this varies across cultures, I would argue that this is typically not considered acceptable in modern first-world societies unless specified beforehand. I don't care what any particular society expects. If following society's rules is the primary concern then fine, but realize this: Every society has these constructs that protect men from jealousy. The problem is that they are all misogynistic in nature, designed to control women with guilt under the guise of moral and religion, so that they may not wield the power of sexual jealousy over men. I refuse to obey such archaic, unnatural and evil constructs. They became obsolete with the condom. Jealousy is an illusion.It is simply your brain giving you a chemical signal, so that you focus your time and resources on your own offspring. Not having this response increases the risk of raising another male's offspring and thus not efficiently reproducing yourself. It is a chemical response to an ancient problem we no longer face, and yet it so severely limits our life, if we let it. Learning to handle jealousy makes you a better man and gives you a more fulfilling love life with less drama. No jealousy means no shame, guilt or inhibition. Conquering jealousy is no easy task, but then most worthwhile tasks in life aren't. Without jealousy, you are sad to see the girl go, but glad she has found someone who makes her happy, and glad you got to fuck her while she looked around. Without jealousy she can even be honest about it, and you too can see other people. It's just better that way. No anger, resentment or drama. Just love. While I generally take a similar viewpoint on jealousy, there is a difference between an agreed-upon open relationship and an open relationship that only one partner is aware of. So its the fact that our hypothetical girl waited too long to break up. The break up was happening anyway, so I don't really see much difference. How does it hurt the person being left more? Simply because a violation of an existing contract does not end up hurting anyone doesn't change the fact that the contract was violated. You're just rationalizing away shitty behavior by examining the consequences, but that's not how ethical systems work. If something is dishonest behavior, then it is dishonest regardless of whether anyone was hurt by it. We have philosophical differences regarding right and wrong then. I'm more concerned with consequences than technicalities. Your philosophical views have no relevance to the original discussion, which is whether or not cheating on your partner makes you a shitty person. It is readily apparent that according to most people's definition of "shitty person", the answer is yes. This is why I brought up society a few posts back; to indicate to you that you are playing semantics and changing definitions from their common usage in order to suit your argument. If your argument is that you don't consider cheating on your partner to be shitty, then that would be reasonable. However, this doesn't change the fact that most people would consider this to be shitty behavior, so my original "assumption" that cheating on your partner makes you a shitty person (by most people's standards, a clarification wouldn't need to be said if not for nitpickers like you) stands.
It doesn't get decided by a vote. The fact that most people would agree with something doesn't make it true. Most people in your society believe evolution is bullshit, so that must be true too then.
And lets be clear; we are discussing whether or not flirting with someone other than your partner is cheating, not whether or not it's OK to sleep with other people behind their back. Our hypothetical situation is a women leaves a man for someone else. My view is that this in itself doesn't make her a bad person, and I am not convinced she is a bad person because she violated some unwritten contract dictated by a misogynistic and outdated model of human interaction.
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On August 13 2013 11:45 aksfjh wrote:Show nested quote +On August 13 2013 09:16 Killscreen wrote:
Obviously. You tell your girl the truth if she asks you if she looks fat after gaining a few pounds? Sometimes people and particularly girls just want validation, and I think it's OK to give them that, even if its not 100% true. So, you think she's fat but you'll lie to her to spare her feelings. Through all of this, I think I have a pretty good read on you...
You just advocated telling a girl she looks fat. This is probably the single worst piece of advice in this entire thread. Never ever ever do that!
Good luck in your relationships. You're going to need it!
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If you think your girl is getting fat, NEVER tell her unless you're an inconsiderate asshole who doesn't mind hurting her feelings. Instead, try going for runs together, doing sports, having fun while at the same time causing her to lose some weight. Even if she understands it might be because you think she's getting fat, it'll be a positive way of dealing with it.
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On August 13 2013 12:25 QuanticHawk wrote:
Of course you do it. You are single. Think of your dick as a pen, the tool which will help you author a story about terrible and regrettable drunk decisions.
You're just projecting your own insecurities on me. Why would you think I get drunk?
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Okay so I got this chicks number at this diner place the other night, I texted her about idk 20 hours later or something and got no response(at this point I assumed a fake number, but she said she had no boyfriend wasn't seeing anyone etc)
Went back in tonight and she was my waitress again, she said sorry if id sent her anything cuz her phone was gonna be off for a couple days till she got paid again, I was like okay, would you like mine so you could text or call me or whatever, and shes like okay sure, so then allt hat happened and I came home
what to do in this situation? pretty sure the first night she gave me my food for free, and made a witty joke + a nice facial expression as I was paying, usually when I get a girls number ive atleast met her before or something like that, but this is kinda new to me.
how are you supposed to like.. talk and stuff in situations like this??
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Wasn't aware that luck was a factor.
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On August 13 2013 18:32 arb wrote:
Okay so I got this chicks number at this diner place the other night, I texted her about idk 20 hours later or something and got no response(at this point I assumed a fake number, but she said she had no boyfriend wasn't seeing anyone etc)
Went back in tonight and she was my waitress again, she said sorry if id sent her anything cuz her phone was gonna be off for a couple days till she got paid again, I was like okay, would you like mine so you could text or call me or whatever, and shes like okay sure, so then allt hat happened and I came home
what to do in this situation? pretty sure the first night she gave me my food for free, and made a witty joke + a nice facial expression as I was paying, usually when I get a girls number ive atleast met her before or something like that, but this is kinda new to me.
how are you supposed to like.. talk and stuff in situations like this??
Just wait it out, see if she texts/calls you. Don't text her again before she texts you, or you'll come across as desperate.
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On August 13 2013 18:44 Henk wrote:Show nested quote +On August 13 2013 18:32 arb wrote:
Okay so I got this chicks number at this diner place the other night, I texted her about idk 20 hours later or something and got no response(at this point I assumed a fake number, but she said she had no boyfriend wasn't seeing anyone etc)
Went back in tonight and she was my waitress again, she said sorry if id sent her anything cuz her phone was gonna be off for a couple days till she got paid again, I was like okay, would you like mine so you could text or call me or whatever, and shes like okay sure, so then allt hat happened and I came home
what to do in this situation? pretty sure the first night she gave me my food for free, and made a witty joke + a nice facial expression as I was paying, usually when I get a girls number ive atleast met her before or something like that, but this is kinda new to me.
how are you supposed to like.. talk and stuff in situations like this?? Just wait it out, see if she texts/calls you. Don't text her again before she texts you, or you'll come across as desperate.
How long would you say wait it out for? Not often I get a girl genuinely interested(andnot often I grow a pair of balls either for that matter)
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United Kingdom36161 Posts
On August 13 2013 15:48 docvoc wrote:Show nested quote +On August 13 2013 15:44 BisuEver wrote:On August 13 2013 14:30 Orcasgt24 wrote:
So I'm curious what TL's views are on open relationships. I really like this girl and she really likes me. We share similar views in our approach to sex. She's cheated on every BF and her ex husband, hence the past tenses. Now I am no player or anything, very little skill in womanizing but feel that sex does not equal love and that its possible to have sex for fun. And sex is such a broad thing. One person cannot possibly offer all their is sexually. She's very clearly going to benefit from this more then I will but the option for me exists to sleep with another woman(she offered to help me get better at picking chicks up too).
We had a chat about that a few days back and laid some ground rules like always wear protection, regular STD tests at the clinic. (before she used an alias since they allow that. I told her she should be using her real name and info. Medical personal deserve to know if you have something when they work on you so they may take the steps necessary to protect themselves. Got no resistance surprisingly) ALWAYS tell the other person before hand if possible (spur of the moment at a bar can happen/phones die and via text is ok because the questions from the other party may be weird) or after if you couldn't and basically just use common sense.
What are your guys views? Can open relationships work? No. That's pretty definitive . I'd say that they certainly can if you want to take an entire dimmension out of sex. A big part of sex is the intimacy of loving someone and being able to whisper in their ear things other than something sexy. Open relationships have no concept of love, they try to put that aside, but of course, someone always falls, and whoever falls, loses. I'd stay away from it if you want it to be a relationship. If you want it to be a booty call with the benefits of having her around rather than not, ok sure, but an open relationship is bound to fail.
This whole post is the biggest pile of nonsense I've ever read in this thread, and that's going some.
I'm in an open relationship and I love my partner very much. We've been going over 5 years.
edit: lol and yes to this:
On August 13 2013 16:22 gedatsu wrote:
Bullshit. Open relationships have the same component of love as closed ones do. And I might as well point out that almost all closed relationships fail too, so that's something open and closed ones have in common.
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On the open relationship question. I don't want them, but if i would accept one, i would make one thing absolutely clear. She can have fun without me, but i will not tolerate if she is already in another committed relationship that is not open. If you are just the little secret, that is bad. If everyone involved is happy with it, and you are happy with it, i don't see why it should be inherently bad.
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On August 13 2013 19:10 arb wrote:Show nested quote +On August 13 2013 18:44 Henk wrote:On August 13 2013 18:32 arb wrote:
Okay so I got this chicks number at this diner place the other night, I texted her about idk 20 hours later or something and got no response(at this point I assumed a fake number, but she said she had no boyfriend wasn't seeing anyone etc)
Went back in tonight and she was my waitress again, she said sorry if id sent her anything cuz her phone was gonna be off for a couple days till she got paid again, I was like okay, would you like mine so you could text or call me or whatever, and shes like okay sure, so then allt hat happened and I came home
what to do in this situation? pretty sure the first night she gave me my food for free, and made a witty joke + a nice facial expression as I was paying, usually when I get a girls number ive atleast met her before or something like that, but this is kinda new to me.
how are you supposed to like.. talk and stuff in situations like this?? Just wait it out, see if she texts/calls you. Don't text her again before she texts you, or you'll come across as desperate. How long would you say wait it out for? Not often I get a girl genuinely interested(andnot often I grow a pair of balls either for that matter)
Hm well I'd say a week or so, you don't want to text her before her cellphone is fixed at least. She has to read your first text before you send her more. She's interested though, so she'll probably return your text/call you.
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On August 13 2013 20:37 Henk wrote:Show nested quote +On August 13 2013 19:10 arb wrote:On August 13 2013 18:44 Henk wrote:On August 13 2013 18:32 arb wrote:
Okay so I got this chicks number at this diner place the other night, I texted her about idk 20 hours later or something and got no response(at this point I assumed a fake number, but she said she had no boyfriend wasn't seeing anyone etc)
Went back in tonight and she was my waitress again, she said sorry if id sent her anything cuz her phone was gonna be off for a couple days till she got paid again, I was like okay, would you like mine so you could text or call me or whatever, and shes like okay sure, so then allt hat happened and I came home
what to do in this situation? pretty sure the first night she gave me my food for free, and made a witty joke + a nice facial expression as I was paying, usually when I get a girls number ive atleast met her before or something like that, but this is kinda new to me.
how are you supposed to like.. talk and stuff in situations like this?? Just wait it out, see if she texts/calls you. Don't text her again before she texts you, or you'll come across as desperate. How long would you say wait it out for? Not often I get a girl genuinely interested(andnot often I grow a pair of balls either for that matter) Hm well I'd say a week or so, you don't want to text her before her cellphone is fixed at least. She has to read your first text before you send her more. She's interested though, so she'll probably return your text/call you.
It's tricky because the longer he waits, the more the attraction he sparked will fade, at least that is my experience. The fact that she doesn't have a phone atm makes it complicated too. Why would she turn off her phone until she gets paid?
When it comes to first time texts what has worked for me is to keep the message short and picking up a thread from an earlier conversation. Be careful not to invest too much too soon, if you're prone to that sort of thing.
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On August 13 2013 14:30 Orcasgt24 wrote:
So I'm curious what TL's views are on open relationships. I really like this girl and she really likes me. We share similar views in our approach to sex. She's cheated on every BF and her ex husband, hence the past tenses. Now I am no player or anything, very little skill in womanizing but feel that sex does not equal love and that its possible to have sex for fun. And sex is such a broad thing. One person cannot possibly offer all their is sexually. She's very clearly going to benefit from this more then I will but the option for me exists to sleep with another woman(she offered to help me get better at picking chicks up too).
We had a chat about that a few days back and laid some ground rules like always wear protection, regular STD tests at the clinic. (before she used an alias since they allow that. I told her she should be using her real name and info. Medical personal deserve to know if you have something when they work on you so they may take the steps necessary to protect themselves. Got no resistance surprisingly) ALWAYS tell the other person before hand if possible (spur of the moment at a bar can happen/phones die and via text is ok because the questions from the other party may be weird) or after if you couldn't and basically just use common sense.
What are your guys views? Can open relationships work?
They can, but as weird as it sounds, you almost need more trust than a normal relationship since there's a much larger chance of stds, and you have to worry about stuff like her calling before hand if possible (this seems like a really odd line in the sand to draw, and I'm sure if she cheated on her ex husband, this will be broken before long)
However, I think an open relationship works if you're both the type of people who do not believe in monogamy. tbh, you sound like you like her, wanna keep on boning her and would like to do a traditional monogamous relationship, but you know she's not trustworthy in a relationship, so you did this. I don't know why you didn't just stick to casual dating with her instead.
On August 13 2013 19:10 arb wrote:Show nested quote +On August 13 2013 18:44 Henk wrote:On August 13 2013 18:32 arb wrote:
Okay so I got this chicks number at this diner place the other night, I texted her about idk 20 hours later or something and got no response(at this point I assumed a fake number, but she said she had no boyfriend wasn't seeing anyone etc)
Went back in tonight and she was my waitress again, she said sorry if id sent her anything cuz her phone was gonna be off for a couple days till she got paid again, I was like okay, would you like mine so you could text or call me or whatever, and shes like okay sure, so then allt hat happened and I came home
what to do in this situation? pretty sure the first night she gave me my food for free, and made a witty joke + a nice facial expression as I was paying, usually when I get a girls number ive atleast met her before or something like that, but this is kinda new to me.
how are you supposed to like.. talk and stuff in situations like this?? Just wait it out, see if she texts/calls you. Don't text her again before she texts you, or you'll come across as desperate. How long would you say wait it out for? Not often I get a girl genuinely interested(andnot often I grow a pair of balls either for that matter)
she replies or she doesnt really. kinda outta your hands now. worry about what you do if she replies
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EPT
