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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.

Posts of the following nature are banned:
1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post.
2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no.
3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture.
4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.

Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating.
BigAsia
Profile Joined November 2012
Canada451 Posts
July 08 2013 01:52 GMT
#4141
On July 08 2013 10:46 Zooper31 wrote:
Met girl through mutual friend. I'm 21, she's 18. We hang out couple times as a group and we spend a whole day together as a music festival. She's hanging on me all day (I'm loving it), 3 different people comment on us being cute together or want us to have our picture taken as a couple (paid photographers). Might've finally found myself a gf after being single for 3yrs.

Find out she's actually 16yr and was lying to me about her age because she didn't think I'd accept her being so young... Complete DAFUQ moment. No signs that this was coming and I asked how old she was, what am I supposed to ask for ID? She looks and acts like any 18yr I've ever met.

Don't know what to do, know what I should do, stop seeing her on the case of jailbait. Really don't want to and I'll definitely treat her a little different now but fuck, gdi. Really liked her :/


First brah whats legal in your state cuz i know in the usa its different depending on where you live. also how hot is she
YOLO
farvacola
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
United States18838 Posts
July 08 2013 01:55 GMT
#4142
On July 08 2013 10:46 Zooper31 wrote:
Met girl through mutual friend. I'm 21, she's 18. We hang out couple times as a group and we spend a whole day together as a music festival. She's hanging on me all day (I'm loving it), 3 different people comment on us being cute together or want us to have our picture taken as a couple (paid photographers). Might've finally found myself a gf after being single for 3yrs.

Find out she's actually 16yr and was lying to me about her age because she didn't think I'd accept her being so young... Complete DAFUQ moment. No signs that this was coming and I asked how old she was, what am I supposed to ask for ID? She looks and acts like any 18yr I've ever met.

Don't know what to do, know what I should do, stop seeing her on the case of jailbait. Really don't want to and I'll definitely treat her a little different now but fuck, gdi. Really liked her :/

Take it easy until her birthday. That's my only advice. lol
"when the Dead Kennedys found out they had skinhead fans, they literally wrote a song titled 'Nazi Punks Fuck Off'"
Ubiquitousdichotomy
Profile Joined January 2013
247 Posts
July 08 2013 01:58 GMT
#4143
On July 08 2013 10:46 Zooper31 wrote:
Met girl through mutual friend. I'm 21, she's 18. We hang out couple times as a group and we spend a whole day together as a music festival. She's hanging on me all day (I'm loving it), 3 different people comment on us being cute together or want us to have our picture taken as a couple (paid photographers). Might've finally found myself a gf after being single for 3yrs.

Find out she's actually 16yr and was lying to me about her age because she didn't think I'd accept her being so young... Complete DAFUQ moment. No signs that this was coming and I asked how old she was, what am I supposed to ask for ID? She looks and acts like any 18yr I've ever met.

Don't know what to do, know what I should do, stop seeing her on the case of jailbait. Really don't want to and I'll definitely treat her a little different now but fuck, gdi. Really liked her :/


RUN
Zooper31
Profile Joined May 2009
United States5711 Posts
July 08 2013 02:14 GMT
#4144
18yr legal in my state of course. And ya, that's the only thing I can really do farvacola. I'm always the guy who would shame others who got involved with under-age girls lol. But I essentially got tricked into it and I feel like I'm a total hyprocite now :/
Asato ma sad gamaya, tamaso ma jyotir gamaya, mrtyor mamrtam gamaya
BigAsia
Profile Joined November 2012
Canada451 Posts
July 08 2013 02:21 GMT
#4145
On July 08 2013 11:14 Zooper31 wrote:
18yr legal in my state of course. And ya, that's the only thing I can really do farvacola. I'm always the guy who would shame others who got involved with under-age girls lol. But I essentially got tricked into it and I feel like I'm a total hyprocite now :/


Take back what I said brah, gtfo of there b4 chris hansen comes to your house
YOLO
rezoacken
Profile Joined April 2010
Canada2719 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-07-08 02:51:48
July 08 2013 02:49 GMT
#4146
On July 04 2013 01:09 Dark_Chill wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 03 2013 22:33 BigAsia wrote:
Only bad part about dating a hot girl is how much male attention she gets. Not that I really mind but its annoying when they hit on her and I'm there. Should I give them all titty twisters?


If you're there, you're gonna have to stand up. Does not look good when it seems like you're just letting it happen. If stuff gets aggressive because the other guy isn't listening, it can be a bit of a problem. You could always hint that you have a weapon if you want to avoid violence. Obviously some people will be stronger than you, but intimidation can still work.


Meh. I would avoid confrontation, unless you really have the physic to back it up and don't go in places where you can get into a nasty fight.

Unless you go out with a massive cheater, you're safe most of the time to be honest and being not bitchy about it will probably avoid conflicts with her. However if it really annoys you or you smell a "threat", you can first mark your territory by showing physicly that you're not her orbit but her bf (arms around, a kiss etc). If someone still begin a conversation with her (while you were away for example), just hijack the conversation by being friendly and showing this your girlfriend and misdirecting the conversation on another topic.

Another thing you can have fun with is pushing her towards the other guy, saying they would make a cute couple with a smirk on your face or that you think he is hitting on her and she totally should get his number. You might even make the whole thing a roleplay where your girl acts as if she's single and accepts the guy advances but will laugh with you after its over.

Either way, if these do not work and if your girl wants you to get agressive to keep her and it ends you being in fights... consider dumping her no good will come out of it. Unless you like it I guess.
Either we are alone in the Universe or we are not. Both are equally terrifying.
Dosey
Profile Joined September 2010
United States4505 Posts
July 08 2013 03:02 GMT
#4147
On July 08 2013 10:46 Zooper31 wrote:
Met girl through mutual friend. I'm 21, she's 18. We hang out couple times as a group and we spend a whole day together as a music festival. She's hanging on me all day (I'm loving it), 3 different people comment on us being cute together or want us to have our picture taken as a couple (paid photographers). Might've finally found myself a gf after being single for 3yrs.

Find out she's actually 16yr and was lying to me about her age because she didn't think I'd accept her being so young... Complete DAFUQ moment. No signs that this was coming and I asked how old she was, what am I supposed to ask for ID? She looks and acts like any 18yr I've ever met.

Don't know what to do, know what I should do, stop seeing her on the case of jailbait. Really don't want to and I'll definitely treat her a little different now but fuck, gdi. Really liked her :/

What should you do?

Have a seat Zooper... have a seat.
Najda
Profile Joined June 2010
United States3765 Posts
July 08 2013 16:21 GMT
#4148
On July 08 2013 11:14 Zooper31 wrote:
18yr legal in my state of course. And ya, that's the only thing I can really do farvacola. I'm always the guy who would shame others who got involved with under-age girls lol. But I essentially got tricked into it and I feel like I'm a total hyprocite now :/


Some states have a closeness in age clause that basically means 16 is the effective legal age until the other partner is 6+ years older. That being said, I don't know if I'd pursue her after she lied to you like that.
BigAsia
Profile Joined November 2012
Canada451 Posts
July 08 2013 16:47 GMT
#4149
On July 09 2013 01:21 Najda wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 08 2013 11:14 Zooper31 wrote:
18yr legal in my state of course. And ya, that's the only thing I can really do farvacola. I'm always the guy who would shame others who got involved with under-age girls lol. But I essentially got tricked into it and I feel like I'm a total hyprocite now :/


Some states have a closeness in age clause that basically means 16 is the effective legal age until the other partner is 6+ years older. That being said, I don't know if I'd pursue her after she lied to you like that.


Goodnight sweet prince
YOLO
Najda
Profile Joined June 2010
United States3765 Posts
July 09 2013 00:13 GMT
#4150
What do you guys usually do for the first couple dates? Dinner/movie to me is cliche/boring, and having her over isn't really an option because of my current living situation.
kaluro
Profile Joined November 2011
Netherlands760 Posts
July 09 2013 00:42 GMT
#4151
On July 09 2013 09:13 Najda wrote:
What do you guys usually do for the first couple dates? Dinner/movie to me is cliche/boring, and having her over isn't really an option because of my current living situation.


Movie is bad.
You want a location and an activity which allows both of you to get to know each other, to conversate.
During a movie you sit still, can't even talk due to the loudness of the sound and having to pay attention.

Board games work really well, even though it might sound nerdy. The best talks and moments happen during board games. You take the focus OFF the other person, which allows both of you to breathe and feel more comfortable/relaxed more quickly, it works really well.

or going to a zoo, theme park.. whatever else, as long as you're on the move and have other things0 to focus on, to not get a creepy constant 1on1 focus. Your number one priority is to make your date feel at ease, relaxed. If you for example sit at a park and give her your full attention, she'll start feeling uncomfortable really easily.
www.twitch.tv/kaluroo - 720p60fps - Remember the name! - Don't do your best, do whatever it takes.
r.Evo
Profile Joined August 2006
Germany14080 Posts
July 09 2013 00:51 GMT
#4152
On July 09 2013 09:13 Najda wrote:
What do you guys usually do for the first couple dates? Dinner/movie to me is cliche/boring, and having her over isn't really an option because of my current living situation.

In addition to the above, aim for doing something you want to do (ideally something that's better with company) and just ask her along.

Whether that's climbing, billiard, visiting a museum or certain shows, maybe even exploring a city you haven't been to. Anything where you can be like "Oh, I wanted to do xyz for some time now, wanna come along?" goes.
"We don't make mistakes here, we call it happy little accidents." ~Bob Ross
BigAsia
Profile Joined November 2012
Canada451 Posts
July 09 2013 01:18 GMT
#4153
On July 09 2013 09:51 r.Evo wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 09 2013 09:13 Najda wrote:
What do you guys usually do for the first couple dates? Dinner/movie to me is cliche/boring, and having her over isn't really an option because of my current living situation.

In addition to the above, aim for doing something you want to do (ideally something that's better with company) and just ask her along.

Whether that's climbing, billiard, visiting a museum or certain shows, maybe even exploring a city you haven't been to. Anything where you can be like "Oh, I wanted to do xyz for some time now, wanna come along?" goes.


If you're in a city by water take her to the boardwalk, pop open a bottle of wine brah. If not then no idea what to say - that's my go to move
YOLO
WarSame
Profile Blog Joined February 2010
Canada1950 Posts
July 09 2013 02:52 GMT
#4154
I have to back up Kaluro and R.Evo on that. Spot on!
Can it be I stayed away too long? Did you miss these rhymes while I was gone?
Zooper31
Profile Joined May 2009
United States5711 Posts
July 09 2013 03:20 GMT
#4155
On July 09 2013 01:21 Najda wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 08 2013 11:14 Zooper31 wrote:
18yr legal in my state of course. And ya, that's the only thing I can really do farvacola. I'm always the guy who would shame others who got involved with under-age girls lol. But I essentially got tricked into it and I feel like I'm a total hyprocite now :/


Some states have a closeness in age clause that basically means 16 is the effective legal age until the other partner is 6+ years older. That being said, I don't know if I'd pursue her after she lied to you like that.


6yrs isn't anything for a couple to have in age differences, but her being so young, it matters. Ya I brought it up to her that she can't lie to me ever again like that, if she does then its gg.
Asato ma sad gamaya, tamaso ma jyotir gamaya, mrtyor mamrtam gamaya
Dark_Chill
Profile Joined May 2011
Canada3353 Posts
July 09 2013 03:29 GMT
#4156
I've always found that movies aren't really that bad. I can usually make enough conversation even during the movies (not talking over it all the time but making snappy comments every now and then) which can easily highlight your good traits (funny, possibly witty, etc).
And here are two plus sides.
1) Movie theaters are usually located in pretty busy areas i.e places with a lot of stores/restaurants or just general things to do. It's super easy to suggest this as well. Some people have trouble asking people on a "date" but movies are easier because it's way easier to say "hey wanna come to this movie with me?" rather than "hey wanna come to this restaurant with me?". After the movie, it's really easy to just transition to "wanna get a bite to eat while we're here" or "there's a cool museum/zoo/etc around here that we can go to".
2) It gives something to talk about if you're feeling it's hard to start the conversation. Transitions can be easier than starting off on a topic, and both are harder than just rolling with a topic you've been given.
CUTE MAKES RIGHT
Dark_Chill
Profile Joined May 2011
Canada3353 Posts
July 09 2013 03:30 GMT
#4157
On July 09 2013 12:20 Zooper31 wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 09 2013 01:21 Najda wrote:
On July 08 2013 11:14 Zooper31 wrote:
18yr legal in my state of course. And ya, that's the only thing I can really do farvacola. I'm always the guy who would shame others who got involved with under-age girls lol. But I essentially got tricked into it and I feel like I'm a total hyprocite now :/


Some states have a closeness in age clause that basically means 16 is the effective legal age until the other partner is 6+ years older. That being said, I don't know if I'd pursue her after she lied to you like that.


6yrs isn't anything for a couple to have in age differences, but her being so young, it matters. Ya I brought it up to her that she can't lie to me ever again like that, if she does then its gg.


Glad to hear it seems to be working out. Plus, you don't really have to worry about being a hypocrite. If your friends do bring it up, you can just say that you were wrong to say that, and you want to make things work with her, or something along those lines (if you do actually care about it).
CUTE MAKES RIGHT
QuanticHawk
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States32084 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-07-09 03:40:30
July 09 2013 03:39 GMT
#4158
double
PROFESSIONAL GAMER - SEND ME OFFERS TO JOIN YOUR TEAM - USA USA USA
QuanticHawk
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States32084 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-07-09 03:46:31
July 09 2013 03:40 GMT
#4159
On July 04 2013 01:09 Dark_Chill wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 03 2013 22:33 BigAsia wrote:
Only bad part about dating a hot girl is how much male attention she gets. Not that I really mind but its annoying when they hit on her and I'm there. Should I give them all titty twisters?


If you're there, you're gonna have to stand up. Does not look good when it seems like you're just letting it happen. If stuff gets aggressive because the other guy isn't listening, it can be a bit of a problem. You could always hint that you have a weapon if you want to avoid violence. Obviously some people will be stronger than you, but intimidation can still work.


yeah implying that you have a weapon when you dont when trying to ward off a dude who has already decided youre enough of a bitch that he's going to go right up to your girl when youre clearly with her is not going to go well at all


this dude hit it out of the park.

On July 04 2013 03:33 gedatsu wrote:
When someone is hitting on your girlfriend, just say "dude are you hitting on my girlfriend?" in a completely non-threatening way. Either he backs off, or he says "yes" and keeps going. In that case, I would smile and say "well good luck!"

Because, you know, if the come-on works on her, you won't be able to stop her from cheating anyway. Unless you plan on keeping tabs on her 24/7. Not worrying that she might run off with whoever gives her attention means you're showing her you're confident you're better than that guy. If you genuinely aren't better and she knows it, you won't be able to stop them from getting together. Even with a weapon.


chances are, most dudes who are approaching your girlfriend dont actually notice youre there probably because theyre drunk. if youre just like yeah, with me man, no big deal, you defuse 95% of problems effortlessly because it is non confrontational, but at the same time it conveys are very lol you wouldnt have a chance anyway vibe
PROFESSIONAL GAMER - SEND ME OFFERS TO JOIN YOUR TEAM - USA USA USA
.SCATesteR
Profile Joined April 2013
United States148 Posts
July 09 2013 03:41 GMT
#4160
yea so i havent had much luck. kinda sucks. Where do you guys tend to meet the classy bitchs at? no but seriously is anyone having trouble actully finding a spot to meet women?
Welcome back MKP!!!!
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