EPTOn November 01 2018 09:02 hkim9936 wrote:
wtf is this post
wtf is this post
The end is nigh for the sexual guy. Heed my warning, you shall neutered without even realizing it.
Dating: How's your luck? - Page 1027
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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on. Posts of the following nature are banned: 1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post. 2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no. 3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture. 4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments. Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. | ||
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Uldridge
Belgium5183 Posts
The end is nigh for the sexual guy. Heed my warning, you shall neutered without even realizing it. | ||
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Emnjay808
United States10665 Posts
On November 01 2018 09:04 hkim9936 wrote: I like the girl, i like the sex we like to screw around, that is all Fwb casual sex is swell. The moment you start to see it be more than that is when you should communicate it ASAP. For both parties’ sake I found most of my “serious” relationships to have come from being friends first. | ||
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L_Master
United States8017 Posts
On November 01 2018 09:26 Dark_Chill wrote: Don't do it. If you know you won't like dating her, and she wants to date, just don't do it. This shit could definitely affect your living situation (and the living situation of 3 other people) and cause you a lot of stress. It could be terrible financially as well. If she comes out and says something similar to "I like you, let's start dating", say no. If she instead just gets more and more physical, you can simply stop it there. She'd probably be sad that you won't date her, but it's better than potentially damaging your living situation. This is basically my thoughts. Tbh I have no clue if she wants a relationship or just wants to bang...but I do know how even if it starts one way it can change easily for the other person. The other main downside is that much of the drama management you can use with a typical FWB situation goes away when you're living with them. MTA: The situation I'll have to be most careful with is if we both drink. I'm pretty confident she will be quire receptive or maybe even aggressive in that case, and we all know how alcohol tends to impair our inhibitions and logic around someone me are attracted to. Sober...pretty sure I'll be fine, especially since I'm very happy with my current relationships and not lacking for either good female companionship or sex. | ||
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Emnjay808
United States10665 Posts
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L_Master
United States8017 Posts
On November 01 2018 11:56 Emnjay808 wrote: The more you dwell on this the more likely you’re gonna hook up with her. Unless ur already active with another partner. Sober...pretty sure I'll be fine, especially since I'm very happy with my current relationships and not lacking for either sex or good female companionship. I'll be fine.  I also don't dwell on things. I'm just figuring out how I want to handle the situation. I.e. just continue to be the same, blatantly tell her no, etc. | ||
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TheFish7
United States2824 Posts
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bloodwhore~
1010 Posts
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Acrofales
Spain18320 Posts
On November 04 2018 18:40 bloodwhore~ wrote: Like most I think the "risks" far outweigh the benefits of hooking up with a roomate. I am not really sure why you are even considering it. In this thread I at least get the impression that you fare pretty well with girls on tinder. Has that changed or why are you resorting to girls in your own house? I've dated a flatmate and had it fall apart quickly. It was a bit awkward, but we dealt with it. I've also had 4 different pairs of flatmates hook up. 3 of those are still happily married, the others broke up after a long relationship together (and they had already moved out and in together). Finally, I've had a pair of flatmates who hooked up and fought continuously. That was really bad, but they were both individually also just really not nice people, so /shrug. However, if you are planning on just hooking up and are already sure you don't want something more serious, then save all your flatmates, and yourself, the hassle and don't do it. | ||
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geokilla
Canada8247 Posts
Honestly I think listening to some girl's dating advice isn't very good either. Especially if they've been out of the dating game for years. | ||
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[UoN]Sentinel
United States11320 Posts
On November 04 2018 20:58 geokilla wrote: Honestly I think listening to some girl's dating advice isn't very good either. Especially if they've been out of the dating game for years. It's like asking a fish for advice on how to catch it | ||
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waffelz
Germany711 Posts
On November 04 2018 20:58 geokilla wrote: Honestly I think listening to some ftfy | ||
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bloodwhore~
1010 Posts
On November 04 2018 20:58 geokilla wrote:Honestly I think listening to some girl's dating advice isn't very good either. Especially if they've been out of the dating game for years. Yeah... I dont recommend this either. I'd say if you have already been dating someone for some period of time they can give good advice. For instance, my friend called out that my date was crazy way before she actually went nuts. (There were a ton of red flags though hehe). However, for the "initial period" where you start dating someone, the girls I've talked to have no fucking clue how to act. But to be fair, I think most people give kinda bad advice, unless they have dated a lot themselves and is in a similar spot. Some people have just cruised on a shrimp sandwich and think advice like "just be yourself" and "say hello" is somehow groundbreaking. ------------------------------------------- On another slightly related note. Like a month ago I went on a date with a canadian girl, she had some Indian genes. We got to the subject of me talking to a girl on tinder from India and she said that I probably wouldn't like her because of the accent. Fast forward to yesterday, I went on the date with the girl from India. I wasn't a fan.  Also, I almost got bootycalled yesterday night, but her "phone died". I guess she regretted asking if she could see my new apartment at midnight lol. | ||
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LemOn
United Kingdom8629 Posts
On November 04 2018 20:58 geokilla wrote: Note to self: Don't over think and complicate things and just try to take things naturally. I revisited my text messages with her and we started off great. I got too pushy or persistent or desperate to see her and now I got ignored. I just hope I'll see her again in the future but no more trying to meet up with her and asking her friends if they'll be going out together. Fuck I can't believe I did this to myself. Honestly I think listening to some girl's dating advice isn't very good either. Especially if they've been out of the dating game for years. I'm not sure why you'd get angry/emotional even You were heading to being friendzoned or ignored I told you that ages ago, was just a question of time. But I do think n1 priority for you is to get experience, any experience is a great one and if you do have questions just ask. | ||
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L_Master
United States8017 Posts
On November 04 2018 18:40 bloodwhore~ wrote: Like most I think the "risks" far outweigh the benefits of hooking up with a roomate. I am not really sure why you are even considering it. In this thread I at least get the impression that you fare pretty well with girls on tinder. Has that changed or why are you resorting to girls in your own house? Did you guys read what I wrote? I basically said I'm not considering it, and was looking for opinions on the best way to handle it. Continue to do the same and be pleasant but not escalate, tell her clearly I'm not interested, etc. | ||
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L_Master
United States8017 Posts
On November 05 2018 05:21 LemOn wrote: I'm not sure why you'd get angry/emotional even You were heading to being friendzoned or ignored I told you that ages ago, was just a question of time. But I do think n1 priority for you is to get experience, any experience is a great one and if you do have questions just ask. Yea, we did try to warn you on this. It's what tends to happen when you come off as heavily interested in her without increasing the escalation and sense of dating. | ||
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bloodwhore~
1010 Posts
On November 05 2018 06:05 L_Master wrote: Staying away for now, but I'm getting the feeling it's now going to require some serious effort on my part, especially since I am attracted to her physically. Anybody dealt with a similar situation or have thoughts? If this wasn't considering it I dont know what to say And the whole premise that you would need to ask us for help shutting down someones advances just looks to me that you want us to tell you "just fuck her" honestly. Lets reverse the situation. Lets say you were really interested in her, and she doesn't want to fuck shit up. You keep flirting with her. What advice would you give her if you were her friend? | ||
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LemOn
United Kingdom8629 Posts
On November 05 2018 06:02 L_Master wrote: Did you guys read what I wrote? I basically said I'm not considering it, and was looking for opinions on the best way to handle it. Continue to do the same and be pleasant but not escalate, tell her clearly I'm not interested, etc. It's like you know nothing about women at all! The not interested thing and pure logic you use on men and masculine women, won't kill the tension when you just say she can't have you without going into long detail but keep acting the same way that seems to attract her. It's like you're creating a forbidden fruit scenario straight out of a romance novel. On women you just go ahead and friendzone yourself, spew your emotion and secrets on her asap, be always available, talk about yourself instead of listening, hang out with her but always invite other people too and actively seek group scenarios, ignore her physical hints and make sure you add her on facebook and social media and text her as much as you can and boom! You got yourself not only a roommate, but deflated the tension, have a nice a friend who just earned a new gay male girlfriend, and will help you hookup with her friends too, win win! | ||
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evilfatsh1t
Australia8881 Posts
On November 05 2018 16:06 bloodwhore~ wrote: If this wasn't considering it I dont know what to say And the whole premise that you would need to ask us for help shutting down someones advances just looks to me that you want us to tell you "just fuck her" honestly. Lets reverse the situation. Lets say you were really interested in her, and she doesn't want to fuck shit up. You keep flirting with her. What advice would you give her if you were her friend? pretty much this. if you legitimately werent even considering it then you wouldnt be on this thread asking for advice. youd just completely ignore her and shut her down or do what lemon said, turn her off. you were clearly hoping for a "sleep with her. it worked out well for me and my friends". you may not have acted upon it but itd still make you feel better about yourself if you do | ||
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mantequilla
Turkey781 Posts
Long story short I don't know how to converse with her, preferably one on one, without going out of my line, appearing needy clingy creepy etc. We work at different projects and different groups so natural interaction is rare. Let me summarize: - I started to work here about 20 days ago. She is an intern but here for about 3,months. - We work in a large room with about 15 people. - One evening I overstay to do some work, she and I are the only people in the room. I am reluctant to talk or meet but she says we are from the same school and knows my name. We talk for a bit and her friend comes and they leave together. - A few days pass and only social interaction between us is nodding and smiling whenever eyes meet, and I say good morning etc. - One day she gives some deserts to all people in the room. I get mine, then a bit later go to her desk to get another one. I converse a bit on where did she get the desert etc. Then I ask lets go get a tea with the desert if she doesn't have something to do right now. She says thank you but I have to write an email now. I am trying to catch her to to talk but she is either working at her desk, with her friends (I don't know them) etc. and never alone or seems open to approach. I am not a sociable person naturally so I don't know the line between being warm and sociable and being too aggressive and out of the line. I want to learn this skill. Her internship will end in a few weeks so even if I make a mistake I probably wont see her again so its a good practice chance | ||
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LemOn
United Kingdom8629 Posts
This one ain't so hard, she gave you direct verbal rejection without rebuttal so move on, don't practice in the workplace. | ||
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