EPTShoutouts to many people, Pooper-scooper, chokoboho, maleorderbride, brood, school_victim, SickOfLife [appearances by klogon/rekrul/waxy] and any other contributers!)
Since I had so many replies and views (and for eG)Heavens’ /weedlovers suggestion), I thought that it would only be fair that I kept you guys updated. Everyone loves drama =] I told myself I would post this even if I asked her and she told me “Fuck off you’re ugly I would never date you in a million years.” I just hope this will interest you guys and not bore you out of your skulls.
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Monday Day 1.
VALENTINE’S DAY! =]
8 am
I dress especially well, psych myself up, review some of my notes on what to say and do on the subway.
Totally ready/pumped for 4th period date proposal
9 am
Fuck. She doesn’t show up in the hallway before class so I’m worried, where is she? She doesn’t show up for first class either, hope she’s just late, subway delay or whatever, I keep looking at the door hoping that she’ll come, but no luck. Finished the class unable to concentrate on anything else, but right now I’m pissed. I wasn't planning on this to happen, worst thing to happen ever. I know she has Physics now, going to go peek to see if she’s there or not. I really hope that she shows up today, or my opportunity gets moved to Wednesday. That would so not be cool.
Side note – Valentine’s day, everyone in our grade paid like 2 bucks to get a chocolate for every boy and a rose for every girl; she was paired up with one of my other friends (not the same friend) but I guess it doesn’t really mean much, but, whatever. Wrinkled my shirt a bit (in a manner of speech).
Okay took a peek in Physics, didn't see her there but I couldn't be sure. Didn't see the entire class and didn't want to seem peeping. (AKA i'm a pussy and don't want anyone being suspicions) I'll know at lunch.
12:40 pm
YES! She's here! SHE HAS ARRIVED. (now that I think of it, it's even better because I can say "hey why did you skip..." etc for humour value! score!)In hallway. I rushed up to type this up. Alright, so hopefully she won't go anywhere for lunch (she usually does) and she'll be somewhere at the beginning of spare. I'll tell my friends to go fuck themselves so there's isolation. I hate peer pressure. Hopefully there won't be many people. Anyways. I will probably proceed on plan. Lunch is 40 minutes then a 75 minute spare period. Wish me good luck guys, I'm gonna go for it I hope I don't fuck it all up.
The following entry is typed up after I got home, so no, it's not real time; I've had some time to think about it.
AROUND 1:40
This is my spare. THANK GOD. She's in her hallway. I'm so relieved. Trouble is, so are like 6 other people. Two of my friends, other random guys in my grade that I had a sneaky suspicion would love for nothing than to spread some fresh gossip. So fuck, we waste about 20 minutes just chatting about useless shit. I'm looking at my watch and going fuck I have to do this now. (I realized I was an idiot; I always pictured her standing in a corner with no one around, but of course this would not happen, I'm dumb) I pull one of my closest buddies over (of whom I share a spare with) and tell him to keep this quiet: that I want to ask this girl out. Of course he is suprised, and asks if he can do anything. I ask him to try and distract my other (not so close) friend and the other people so I can get a stab at her by myself, hopefully as quiet as possible. As he agrees and we start to make plans to do this, SHE WALKS PAST US UP THE STAIRWAY. We stand there dumbfounded in silence. She looks at us weird because it's just the two of us standing there and we're totally silent.
"What are you guys doing here?"
"Uh, nothing much?".
She passes, and I turn to my friend.
"Okay. Stay here. I don't need any more pressure."
He agrees and we part ways. I go up and find her in the computer lab. She's working on her English play, and there are not that many people around, so I'm like, k this is going to be the place. I walk around outside for a while in nervousness trying to prepare myself and maintain a confident and calm composure when my friend rushes up.
"wtf are you doing"
"aw i just wanted to see it =["
"GET THE FUCK BACK DOWNSTAIRS"
He gives me a dirty look and goes down. I walk in, get a computer beside her, and fake doing work and making small talk for a while.
Guess what guys?
Her: "God, I'm so bored this spare"
Me: (SCORE! WINNER! MY CHANCE PERFECT GOGOGOGOGOGOG)
Me: "Hey, want to go to Starbucks with me?"
All this time, my mind is racing, I am going over all the shit I studied over the weekend, all the advice and possibilities. Which response is she going to use? Will she blow me off? Will she give a fake response? What was that I rehearsed for that? What's the proper response? Real response? What about body language? Her eyes, how long has she paused for? What is the response for #5 again?... Suddenly, I hear...
Her: "Sure! Now?"
Me: (No words can describe it, but I THINK managed to mumble: "Yeah, let's go...")
Long story short. We go downstairs to get our coats while my friend is grinning behind her back giving me thumbs up. We leave without too much people looking at us fortunately. But I'm sure someone noticed.
Long story short again. We walk, talk about a lot of things, I wasn't nervous but I wasn't exactly confident or calm either. I tried to be myself because I know she likes that about me. One horrible thing I have to mention.
THE FUCKING WEATHER
I don't think I could have picked a worse day to do this. I mean, coming to school in the morning I knew that it was a shitty day, but I mean, it was raining moderately hard, it was wet and cold and fuck the weather. She didn't seem to bothered by it, and at least tried to hide it from me. I'm pretty sure I whined about the weather. She looks good with messy wet hair.
We get there, she starts looking at books (She does like books, It's like Chapters + Starbucks) but I expected her to follow me and go get a drink. I go over to her and ask her if she wanted a drink and pulled my rehearsed line: "I dragged you down here in this crappy weather... the least I could do is buy you is a drink..." Don't worry. It was really good IRL. At first she's like, No, it's alright. But then I thought about how crappy it would be if I made her walk for like 10 minutes just to look at books and not get anything. I also thought about all the advice about not being too nice to girls. I couldn't fucking help it. I pressed her again if she wanted anything to drink and she said, fine, a hot chocolate. I would have preferred her to follow me, but she seemed interested in the books. I was only interested in her.
So I pay for the stuff (yes I know there will be ones that will say: WTF u paid for her she will think you are too nice now), get a hot chocolate for myself as well, and bring it back to her. She thanked me with a smile that dazzled me. In that moment of weakness my hand trembled a bit and some really fucking hot chocolate poured onto my hand. It was really fucking hot. It hurt like hell, but I managed to smile back and say it was no problem. I continued to grimace through the pain and she enthusiastically showed me all these books while I'm screaming at the pain inside. I kinda zombied out there.
We go back, talk quite a bit, just about normal stuff, you know. I tried to probe into her personal life, and tried to turn the conversation about us individually. Succeeded, I guess, but didn't really tell her straight up that I had an interest in her, I didn't say anything like "hey, I like you" We get back, I told her it was fun and she agreed, joking that the hot chocolate would make her throw up in gym class. I will use that next time as humour. I tried to ask her if she'd like to go on Wednesday again (same spare), but then two of her girlfriends popped out of FUCKING NOWHERE and totally "cock-blocked" me (for lack of a better word to describe the situation). I got locked down. Fuck. I will probably ask her tomorrow or Wednesday to go with me. Should I?
On afterthought: I couldn't really tell if she was showing any signals towards me. Not any clear ones at least. Know that I have no experience reading signals from females. She seemed to have fun and laughed a lot. I know her answer meant that at least she was willing to go with me. It's good, not great (nothing like OMG I LOVE YOU), but definitely not bad either.
I also definitely caught her eye a lot. She was looking at me a lot of the time while talking to me; that's a good sign, yes? Now, I think I'm regretting not looking at her more. I think I was looking way too much at everything else. (Hits self for being idiotic). She also mentioned that she liked several books and have been wanting to read them for a while; I asked her if she had any of them but she said "No, they're much too expensive". I kind of want to buy it for her, but definitely not yet, we're not close enough; PLUS I am not sure if it is a real hint that she REALLY wants the book.
____________The Update above ended 4:30 PM EST______________
Misc. Comments, no time period
I haven't talked to my friend (the dancer).
I only told my two best friends and told them expressively to keep it VERY QUIET.
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Queries:
What should I do now? What's the next step? I don't know where to try and take her. I can't go to the coffee shop again; and I can't go to a movie or something because we only have 75 minutes and I don't feel comfortable yet asking her out afterschool.
How do I make it clear that I want to pursue a relationship and not just be good friends? How fast should I do this? 2nd "date" alone? 3rd?
I haven't told my friend btw.
