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Hilarious IRC quotes

Forum Index > General Forum
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Normal
Veg
Profile Joined October 2002
Canada2945 Posts
February 09 2004 06:50 GMT
#1
--- Nuked ---
asdasdas
Roman
Profile Joined November 2002
United States2595 Posts
February 09 2004 06:56 GMT
#2
rofl
Schnake
Profile Joined September 2003
Germany2819 Posts
February 09 2004 06:58 GMT
#3
LoL, good stuff!
"Alán Shore" and "August Terran" @ LoL EUW - liquidparty
useLess
Profile Blog Joined January 2004
United States4781 Posts
February 09 2004 07:00 GMT
#4

Ah, i remember bash.org. been months since i looked at it.
Moonlight Shadow
Bill307
Profile Blog Joined October 2002
Canada9103 Posts
February 09 2004 07:02 GMT
#5
This is like the third topic to be made about bash.org quotes . But I'll post some more of my saved ones anyway .

#409
<DaZE> at my school.. the cop from DARE passed around 3 joints to show everyone... and he said "if i dont get all three of these back this schools getting locked down and everyones getting searched till i find it.." and like 30 minutes later when everyone got to see 'em and they got passed back the cop had 4

#4680
<Raize> can you guys see what I type?
<vecna> no, raize
<Raize> How do I set it up so you can see it?

#5089
<langdon> FUCK OFF AND HELP ME
<langdon> i mean
<langdon> fuck on
<langdon> fuck over here and help me

#13213
<Spazz> Seems like when I say "FUCK" you get an EOF error :o
*** Quits: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au) (Read error: EOF from client)
*** Joins: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au)
<Bartolimis> fuck
*** Quits: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au) (Read error: EOF from client)
*** Joins: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au)
<Bartolimis> fuck
<Spazz> fuck
*** Quits: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au) (Read error: EOF from client)
*** Joins: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au)
<Spazz> fuck
<Bartolimis> stop
*** Quits: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au) (Read error: EOF from client)
*** Joins: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au)
<Bartolimis> we're done >
<Ranto> hmh?
<Spazz> Your client got an error...
<Bartolimis> yeah, we're done saying fuck
<Spazz> everytime we said f***
*** Quits: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au) (Read error: EOF from client)
*** Joins: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au)
<Spazz> Quit saying fukc
<Bartolimis> my bad
<Spazz> fuck*
*** Quits: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au) (Read error: EOF from client)
*** Joins: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au)
<Icc> Someone says fuck and he drops ?
*** Quits: Ranto (~recon@newax2-042.dialup.optusnet.com.au) (Read error: EOF from client)

#21838
<supers> race
<supers> goto
<supers> http:// So, HOT CHICKS with HUGE DICKS turn you on
<supers> You want to see BOYS FUCKED by REAL SHEMALES ?
<supers> er
<supers> http://216.65.26.84
<supers> damnit
<supers> ..

#22213
<Stingray_> JeyK: we should open a site similar to thinkgeek where people can order IRC-related stuff
<JeyK> Stingray_: I'm scared of dot bombs!
<Stingray_> like shirts that say "My dad can /kick your dad"
<JeyK> haha
<SamBecket> lol
<JeyK> "Your son may have straight As, but my son can /kick your son"
<Stingray_> lol
<Stingray_> that would be a good bumper sticker
<Stingray_> alas, I'm a bit young to pull that off
<JeyK> I've seen "Your son may have straight As, but my son can ____ your son" a lot
<Stingray_> how about "Your son may have straight As, but your daughter has double Ds and don't my son know it!"
<JeyK> ROFL

#22942
<NyseriA> at uni we asked this lad why the carpet was a different colour under this computer desk, he said that he had spilled an eggcup of bleach :D What made it worse though was that there was a lass sat on his beanbag on teh floor and she said, did you spill it upwards onto the keyboard shelf bottom as well


#24911
<D4NG3R0U5> people with names describing themselves are lame
<hotgirl4u> uhh
<D4NG3R0U5> ...nm


#25385
<sutna> You wouldn't think that not knowing the difference between a cupboard and a drawer could break apart a family.
<Seeker> It can?
<sutna> When I was like 6 my mom bought my grandmom a present on my behalf for her birthday. She told me it was in the cupboard and I should go fetch it for granny.
<Seeker> I can see where this is going..
<sutna> So granny is sitting on the couch waiting for her present and I looked in the drawer instead of the cupboard , I came running out the room holding a huge black ribbed dildo.
<Seeker> Well I feel sorry for you but you won't be offended if I piss myself laughing?
<sutna> spose not
<Seeker> WA HA AH AAHA AHA AHA AHA AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

#138338
<Ysabelle> my god
<Ysabelle> a sixteen year old friend of mine has a full beard and goatee.
<bark> hahaha
<Gizmo^_^> impressive
<Gizmo^_^> (says darth)
<Ysabelle> And she refuses to wax!

#178890
*** Now talking in #christian
-Word_of_God- Welcome Abstruse to #christian I am a Bible Bot. For more info type: /msg Word_of_God !info
<Abstruse> !kjv numbers 22:21
<Word_of_God> Numbers 22:21 -- And Balaam rose up in the morning, and saddled his ass, and went with the princes of Moab. - (KJV)
*** SageRider sets mode: +b *!*@c211-30-208-111.rivrw3.nsw.optusnet.com.au
*** Word_of_God was kicked from #christian by SageRider (Please dont Swear)
<Abstruse> I know I'm never going to be able to come back in this channel again after this, but damn was it worth it to see that...
GoDHovZ
Profile Joined January 2004
United States1869 Posts
February 09 2004 07:21 GMT
#6
--- Nuked ---
My skill trancends BW, it is recognized by the billions..... AND BILLIONS of people around the world as nirvana
baal
Profile Joined March 2003
10541 Posts
February 09 2004 07:35 GMT
#7
hovz
Im back, in pog form!
SoL.Origin
Profile Joined September 2003
Argentina2400 Posts
February 09 2004 07:42 GMT
#8
well you seem more and you can play sc
Son Of Law
toptalent
Profile Joined July 2003
United States1825 Posts
February 09 2004 08:03 GMT
#9

<frank> can you help me install GTA3?
<knightmare> first, shut down all programs you aren't using
frank has quit IRC. (Quit)
<knightmare> ...


this actually did happen once when i was helping my friend with his comp over icq.
ForgoTTeN-SupeR
Profile Joined March 2003
United States786 Posts
February 09 2004 08:06 GMT
#10
ok rofl a lot of these are fucking hilarious
GoDHovZ
Profile Joined January 2004
United States1869 Posts
February 09 2004 08:06 GMT
#11
--- Nuked ---
My skill trancends BW, it is recognized by the billions..... AND BILLIONS of people around the world as nirvana
chobopeon
Profile Blog Joined May 2003
United States7342 Posts
February 09 2004 08:22 GMT
#12
On February 09 2004 16:35 baal wrote:
hovz
:O
HorsementalitY
Profile Joined August 2003
United States1159 Posts
February 09 2004 08:28 GMT
#13
Th3No0b> Im going to be the next hitler
<Th3No0b> Im going to kill all the jews and 1 clown
<RageAgainsttheAmish> why the clown
<Th3No0b> See? no one cares about the jews
<RageAgainsttheAmish> lmao


hahaha that one was hilarious
Women, Pot, Futbol and Music
chobopeon
Profile Blog Joined May 2003
United States7342 Posts
February 09 2004 08:37 GMT
#14
at my school.. the cop from DARE passed around 3 joints to show everyone... and he said "if i dont get all three of these back this schools getting locked down and everyones getting searched till i find it.." and like 30 minutes later when everyone got to see 'em and they got passed back the cop had 4..

and with my last gf..
I made the most terrible fruedian slip..
we were sitting at breakfast the one day, and I wanted to ask her "pass the sugar please"
instead I said "you're ruining my life, you fucking bitch"
:O
MrEd
Profile Joined March 2003
Australia357 Posts
February 09 2004 09:10 GMT
#15
i found these the funniest:

<NES> lol
<NES> I download something from Napster
<NES> And the same guy I downloaded it from starts downloading it from me when I'm done
<NES> I message him and say "What are you doing? I just got that from you"
<NES> "getting my song back fucker"

--------------

<superwoman> I had a boyfriend once that made me suck him off while I had a mouthful of beer.
<GrandCow> HAHAHAHA that was me bitch!
<superwoman> DANNY?!?!?!
<GrandCow> MOM?!?!?!?!
My cats breath smells like cat food
GoDHovZ
Profile Joined January 2004
United States1869 Posts
February 09 2004 09:22 GMT
#16
--- Nuked ---
My skill trancends BW, it is recognized by the billions..... AND BILLIONS of people around the world as nirvana
dork
Profile Joined September 2003
Canada2207 Posts
February 09 2004 09:27 GMT
#17
lol that one is gold

haven;t these been posted here before?
staring at the world through the rear view
8882
Profile Blog Joined December 2003
2718 Posts
February 09 2004 17:35 GMT
#18
>I was in biology class once, and the teacher said there was sugar in sperm
>And a girl asked why doesn't it taste sweet then
>When she realised what she said her face became red like a spanked monkey ass
>Then the teacher said, because you taste sweetness with the front of your
tongue, not the part of your tongue back in your throat
>The girl started crying and left class ^^
I have returned
Chibi[OWNS]
Profile Joined May 2003
United Kingdom10597 Posts
February 09 2004 18:26 GMT
#19
--- Nuked ---
linyu)wufan18
Profile Joined October 2002
1198 Posts
February 09 2004 18:27 GMT
#20
-.-
http://sc.replays.net
Mydnyte
Profile Joined October 2003
3306 Posts
February 09 2004 18:48 GMT
#21
On February 10 2004 02:35 8882 wrote:
>I was in biology class once, and the teacher said there was sugar in sperm
>And a girl asked why doesn't it taste sweet then
>When she realised what she said her face became red like a spanked monkey ass
>Then the teacher said, because you taste sweetness with the front of your
tongue, not the part of your tongue back in your throat
>The girl started crying and left class ^^


lol omg
Stormich
Profile Joined August 2003
Croatia336 Posts
February 09 2004 19:00 GMT
#22
omg ownage :D
hi
toptalent
Profile Joined July 2003
United States1825 Posts
February 09 2004 19:04 GMT
#23
that was an old joke.
Liquid`RaSZi
Profile Blog Joined September 2002
Netherlands2766 Posts
February 09 2004 19:14 GMT
#24
Fake or not.. i think this shit is always funny as hell.. as well as the bloodninja stuff.
Fire and blood
Piccolo
Profile Blog Joined November 2003
Chile621 Posts
February 09 2004 21:40 GMT
#25
bash.org is golden ^^
You said wc3 was simpler than SC, wc3 is 3d, SC is 2d, therefore you can counter yourself.... OVazioFrio
SoleSteeler
Profile Joined April 2003
Canada5456 Posts
February 09 2004 22:54 GMT
#26
On February 10 2004 02:35 8882 wrote:
>I was in biology class once, and the teacher said there was sugar in sperm
>And a girl asked why doesn't it taste sweet then
>When she realised what she said her face became red like a spanked monkey ass
>Then the teacher said, because you taste sweetness with the front of your
tongue, not the part of your tongue back in your throat
>The girl started crying and left class ^^


baaahahahahahahaha...

if that's true...
karate
Profile Joined October 2003
Norway120 Posts
February 09 2004 22:58 GMT
#27
This old post is unavailable due to an encoding issue. Please contact an admin if you would like this post restored for historical reasons.
vGl-CoW
Profile Blog Joined December 2002
Belgium8305 Posts
February 09 2004 23:00 GMT
#28
wtf, how is that comedy?
Moderatorfollow me on twitter if u think ur so tough @BooyaCow
Ryan307 :)
Profile Blog Joined January 2004
United States1289 Posts
February 09 2004 23:13 GMT
#29
<JonJonB> Purely in the interests of science, I have replaced the word "wand" with "wang" in the first Harry Potter Book
<JonJonB> Let's see the results...

<JonJonB> "Why aren't you supposed to do magic?" asked Harry.
<JonJonB> "Oh, well -- I was at Hogwarts meself but I -- er -- got expelled, ter tell yeh the truth. In me third year. They snapped me wang in half an' everything

<JonJonB> A magic wang... this was what Harry had been really looking forward to.

<JonJonB> "Yes, yes. I thought I'd be seeing you soon. Harry Potter." It wasn't a question. "You have your mother's eyes. It seems only yesterday she was in here herself, buying her first wang. Ten and a quarter inches long, swishy, made of willow. Nice wang for charm work."
<JonJonB> "Your father, on the other hand, favored a mahogany wang. Eleven inches. "

<JonJonB> Harry took the wang. He felt a sudden warmth in his fingers. He raised the wang above his head, brought it swishing down through the dusty air and a stream of red and gold sparks shot from the end like a firework, throwing dancing spots of light on to the walls

<JonJonB> "Oh, move over," Hermione snarled. She grabbed Harry's wang, tapped the lock, and whispered, 'Alohomora!"

<JonJonB> The troll couldn't feel Harry hanging there, but even a troll will notice if you stick a long bit of wood up its nose, and Harry's wang had still been in his hand when he'd jumped - it had gone straight up one of the troll's nostrils.

<JonJonB> He bent down and pulled his wang out of the troll's nose. It was covered in what looked like lumpy gray glue.

<JonJonB> He ran onto the field as you fell, waved his wang, and you sort of slowed down before you hit the ground. Then he whirled his wang at the dementors. Shot silver stuff at them.

<JonJonB> Ok
<JonJonB> I have found, definitive proof
<JonJonB> that J.K Rowling is a dirty DIRTY woman, making a fool of us all
<JonJonB> "Yes," Harry said, gripping his wang very tightly, and moving into the middle of the deserted classroom. He tried to keep his mind on flying, but something else kept intruding.... Any second now, he might hear his mother again... but he shouldn't think that, or he would hear her again, and he didn't want to... or did he?
<melusine > O_______O
<JonJonB> Something silver-white, something enormous, erupted from the end of his wang

<JonJonJonB> Then, with a sigh, he raised his wang and prodded the silvery substance with its tip.

<JonJonJonB> 'Get - off - me!' Harry gasped. For a few seconds they struggled, Harry pulling at his uncles sausage-like fingers with his left hand, his right maintaining a firm grip on his raised wang.


HAHAHAHAHA i havn't laughed that hard in so long hahaha
Dont let the action of factual things fracture your casual swing
Ryan307 :)
Profile Blog Joined January 2004
United States1289 Posts
February 09 2004 23:21 GMT
#30
<calin> we had a guy at school that wore black lipstick.. and was all gothy.. and then one day we caught him buying an assvibrator
<ecoli> ew.
<ecoli> wait, you "caught" him?
<ecoli> like, you were behind him in line at the assvibrator store?
<Aero> he doesnt answer
*** Quits: calin (No route to host)


hahahahahahah
Dont let the action of factual things fracture your casual swing
ZyPhReX
Profile Joined January 2003
1192 Posts
February 09 2004 23:29 GMT
#31
On February 09 2004 15:50 Veg wrote:

<tatclass> YOU ALL SUCK DICK
<tatclass> er.
<tatclass> hi.
<andy\code> A common typo.
<tatclass> the keys are like right next to each other.



lol <3
Ghost Me
Dirk
Profile Joined May 2003
United States1339 Posts
February 10 2004 02:35 GMT
#32
<NES> lol
<NES> I download something from Napster
<NES> And the same guy I downloaded it from starts downloading it from me when I'm done
<NES> I message him and say "What are you doing? I just got that from you"
<NES> "getting my song back fucker"

LOL

Just busted out laughing while im here in class, now people think im crazy =/
Dont confuse me wit these suckas... cuz when I spit, you here more OOOs than a skip to my lou move.. at the ruckers - Lloyd Banks
T_T
Profile Joined December 2003
Vatican City State593 Posts
February 10 2004 02:46 GMT
#33
On February 10 2004 11:35 Dirk wrote:
Show nested quote +
<NES> lol
<NES> I download something from Napster
<NES> And the same guy I downloaded it from starts downloading it from me when I'm done
<NES> I message him and say "What are you doing? I just got that from you"
<NES> "getting my song back fucker"

LOL

Just busted out laughing while im here in class, now people think im crazy =/

you are, don't worry
Turn_Over
Profile Joined December 2003
51 Posts
Last Edited: 2004-02-10 03:27:51
February 10 2004 03:22 GMT
#34
This old post is unavailable due to an encoding issue. Please contact an admin if you would like this post restored for historical reasons.
I do RWA replays, link me replays you want me to do.
StuFFofLegenDS
Profile Joined October 2002
United States245 Posts
February 10 2004 06:50 GMT
#35
<Sumezworking> I hate people who let their kids run around naked on the beach..
<Squinky> I know, it's hard to hide an erection in swimming trunks
And NO sprinkles. For every sprinkle I find...I shall KILL you.
Zoom
Profile Joined January 2004
1111 Posts
February 10 2004 06:58 GMT
#36
<ohm> damn
<ohm> FUCK
<ohm> DAMN
<ohm> i was just in an AIM convo with a chick, and my grandmother's window pops up
<ohm> FUCK
<ohm> i go like this to her
<ohm> "i want to suck on your clit"
<ohm> FUCK

that would suck so bad
There's no producing this perfect pose, hit the streets in the freshest clothes. Rip the stage, and bless the shows. Spit the flows and hit the do'
AttackZerg
Profile Blog Joined January 2003
United States7465 Posts
February 10 2004 07:09 GMT
#37
I was chilling with my friends about to buy some weed, and I had just got off the phone with a dude who said he would call me right back to see if he could smoke with us. So I am busy goof'n off with my friends when my phone in my pocket starts vibrating, I pick it up and it a character that me and my friends made up I say

"Sup nigga, you read to smoke some dank and then drink some drink"
then my mom said
"Hi Gary, you had me for a second"

I almost shit my pants.... I've checked who was calling every time that I picked up my phone.
Eniram
Profile Blog Joined January 2004
Sudan3166 Posts
February 10 2004 08:33 GMT
#38
#10110 +(504)- [X]

<kinijima> why do they keep programming labs so fucking cold?
<aalti> so the computers don't get over heated?
<kinijima> so what the fuck did the people do back when there was no air conditioning?
<aalti> you're a fucking idiot.
You can like take a newb to like water, but you cant like make a newb drink. Ya know? - Jeremy
baal
Profile Joined March 2003
10541 Posts
February 10 2004 09:00 GMT
#39
On February 10 2004 15:50 StuFFofLegenDS wrote:
<Sumezworking> I hate people who let their kids run around naked on the beach..
<Squinky> I know, it's hard to hide an erection in swimming trunks


LMAO
Im back, in pog form!
Meta
Profile Blog Joined June 2003
United States6225 Posts
February 10 2004 09:59 GMT
#40
On February 10 2004 17:33 Eniram wrote:
#10110 +(504)- [X]

<kinijima> why do they keep programming labs so fucking cold?
<aalti> so the computers don't get over heated?
<kinijima> so what the fuck did the people do back when there was no air conditioning?
<aalti> you're a fucking idiot.


omfg hahaha

<terrance?>: have you read the LOTR books
<stratusxh>: no, however, i have them, and i'm considering reading them before school
<stratusxh>: dunno though
<stratusxh>: that boost of geekness may well keep me from getting laid for a couple weeks after reading them
<stratusxh>: i sure as hell know the Harry Potter books did that
<terrance?>: fuck harry potter
<stratusxh>: fuck harry potter? fuck your taste in literature
good vibes only
Meta
Profile Blog Joined June 2003
United States6225 Posts
February 10 2004 10:05 GMT
#41
<Blixt> I wonder if the Korean army uses starcraft tactics
<Taerkar> extending the creep and sending hordes of zergs at their enemies?
<Taerkar> "You! Mine those crystals. You two, into the gas factory."
<Blixt> KEKE LA~ OFFICER!

<Al> arabs can't spell so we have to spell for them
<Al> that's why it's "Koran"
<Kurt> short for Korean
<Lloyddy> i thought ^_^ was short for korean
<jre> No, kek is
<Alien> huk of the ke
<Lloyddy> so is keke short for a jolly korean?
<jre> A kek is one unit of kekeke
<jre> THis throws people because of the extra letter
<Alien> keks bind together via k-ration-synthesis, where each unit sheds one k to form a long chain of kekekeks
<Kurt> FREAKIN NERD
<Alien> They're what we in the business call kekides
*Kurt spanks Alien with moon rocks
<jre> The extra Ks then bind to form the atmosphere of the Zerg homeworld
<jre> Koreans are to the Zerg homeworld what trees are to Earth
<jre> Coincidentally enough, when Zergs respirate, they take in Ks and breathe out chop suey
<Alien> When the polykekide chain is broken the free ks are broken to be used for klysis, rendering the Zerg atmosphere a vacuum.
<jre> LIAR

<+MegamanX2K> buh
<@Dragon_Ninja> HIya X
<+MegamanX2K> Diablo 2 pisses me off
<@Dragon_Ninja> what is pissing you off about it now?
<+MegamanX2K> stupid fucking Venom Lord rush
<+MegamanX2K> who do they think they are, Zerg?
<@Dragon_Ninja> LOL
<+MegamanX2K> god, I was waiting for Diablo to go "KEKEKEKEKEKEKEKEKEKEKEKE ^______________________^"

good vibes only
Bleww
Profile Joined October 2002
United States1080 Posts
February 10 2004 10:34 GMT
#42
what's IRC?
I am back
SoMuchBetter
Profile Blog Joined April 2003
Australia10606 Posts
February 10 2004 10:38 GMT
#43
instant relay chat i think
AUSSIESCUM
TeamLiquid eSTROgeneral #1 • RIP
Klogon
Profile Blog Joined November 2002
MURICA15980 Posts
February 10 2004 11:18 GMT
#44
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