• Log InLog In
  • Register
Liquid`
Team Liquid Liquipedia
EDT 17:57
CEST 23:57
KST 06:57
  • Home
  • Forum
  • Calendar
  • Streams
  • Liquipedia
  • Features
  • Store
  • EPT
  • TL+
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Smash
  • Heroes
  • Counter-Strike
  • Overwatch
  • Liquibet
  • Fantasy StarCraft
  • TLPD
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Blogs
Forum Sidebar
Events/Features
News
Featured News
Team Liquid Map Contest #22: Results and Winners7Code S Season 2 (2026): RO4 and Finals Preview12TL.net Map Contest #22 - Voting & Ladder Map Selection7Code S Season 2 (2026) - RO8 Preview7[ASL21] Finals Preview: Two Legacies21
Community News
Weekly Cups (June 8-14): Clem and Solar double, PTR tested0RSL: S6 Finals played at BlizzCon 202611Douyu Cup 2026: $20,000 Legends Event (June 26-28)10[BSL22] Non-Korean Championship from 13 to 28 June4Weekly Cups (May 25-31): Clem doubles, 2v2 circuit heads toward finale0
StarCraft 2
General
TL Poll: How do you feel about the 5.0.16 PTR balance changes? Code S Season 2 (2026) - RO8 Preview Updates to The Core/Core Lite for v5.0.16? RSL: S6 Finals played at BlizzCon 2026 Weekly Cups (June 8-14): Clem and Solar double, PTR tested
Tourneys
GSL CK #4 20-21th June Douyu Cup 2026: $20,000 Legends Event (June 26-28) Maestros of The Game 2 announcement and schedule ! Sparkling Tuna Cup - Weekly Open Tournament Sea Duckling Open (Global, Bronze-Diamond)
Strategy
[G] Having the right mentality to improve
Custom Maps
Work In Progress Melee Maps [D]RTS in all its shapes and glory <3
External Content
Mutation # 530 One For All The PondCast: SC2 News & Results Mutation # 529 Opportunities Unleashed Mutation # 528 Infection Detected
Brood War
General
vespene.gg — BW replays in browser Where is EffOrt? BW General Discussion BGH Auto Balance -> http://bghmmr.eu/ Quality of life changes in BW that you will like ?
Tourneys
[Megathread] Daily Proleagues [ASL21] Grand Finals [BSL22] Grand Finals - Sunday 21:00 CEST Escore Tournament StarCraft Season 2
Strategy
Relatively freeroll strategies Creating a full chart of Zerg builds Why doesn't anyone use restoration? Any training maps people recommend?
Other Games
General Games
Stormgate/Frost Giant Megathread Beyond All Reason ZeroSpace Megathread Total War: Warhammer 40K Path of Exile
Dota 2
Looking for a Dota Mentor Official 'what is Dota anymore' discussion
League of Legends
Heroes of the Storm
Simple Questions, Simple Answers Heroes of the Storm 2.0
Hearthstone
Deck construction bug
TL Mafia
Vanilla Mini Mafia
Community
General
US Politics Mega-thread Russo-Ukrainian War Thread UK Politics Mega-thread [H]Internet/Gaming Cafe Tips and Tricks Trading/Investing Thread
Fan Clubs
The HerO Fan Club! The herO Fan Club!
Media & Entertainment
Movie Discussion! [Req][Books] Good Fantasy/SciFi books [TV/BOOK] *SPOILERS* Game of Thrones Discussion [Manga] One Piece
Sports
2024 - 2026 Football Thread TeamLiquid Health and Fitness Initiative For 2023 Formula 1 Discussion Cricket [SPORT] NBA General Discussion
World Cup 2022
Tech Support
Computer Build, Upgrade & Buying Resource Thread Facing Challenges in Mobile App Development
TL Community
The Automated Ban List
Blogs
Does Workplace Frustration D…
TrAiDoS
An Exploration of th…
waywardstrategy
I'm an arrogant trash talke…
FlaShFTW
Gauntlet SC2: A Retrospectiv…
Ctone23
Why RTS gamers make better f…
gosubay
Customize Sidebar...

Website Feedback

Closed Threads



Active: 11110 users

One-Line Confessions - Page 68

Forum Index > Closed
Post a Reply
Prev 1 66 67 68 69 70 209 Next
Megalisk
Profile Blog Joined October 2008
United States6095 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-01-05 01:22:23
January 05 2010 01:22 GMT
#1341
I am now seriously considering trying to play starcraft with my dick, and conceiving methods in which I will accomplish such a task, hoping I can beat a D- player.

Well, I'll still have to have a hand on the mouse...
Tear stained american saints and dirty guitar dreams across a universe of desert and blue sky , gas station coffee love letters and two dollar pistol kisses from thirty five dollar hotel room stationary .
iNfeRnaL *
Profile Blog Joined August 2005
Germany1908 Posts
January 05 2010 01:26 GMT
#1342
rofl this thread really made some nerds try to play bw with their dicks.
epic
fucking
win
Ilikestarcraft
Profile Blog Joined November 2004
Korea (South)17743 Posts
January 05 2010 01:46 GMT
#1343
opponent: hahaha wtf are you playing with? Your dick?
me: tyuedas
opponent: wait what?
ils
"Nana is a goddess. Or at very least, Nana is my goddess." - KazeHydra
Archaic
Profile Blog Joined March 2008
United States4024 Posts
January 05 2010 01:49 GMT
#1344
On January 05 2010 10:46 Ilikestarcraft wrote:
opponent: hahaha wtf are you playing with? Your dick?
me: tyuedas
opponent: wait what?

This made me laugh because I tried to imagine the entire situation in real life.
[UoN]Sentinel
Profile Blog Joined November 2009
United States11320 Posts
January 05 2010 04:12 GMT
#1345
I have played BW with my dick, I whipped around my hand and pressed it so hard I got wood and had to hit like 3 keys at a time.

APM = 134, I won the game too.
Нас зовет дух отцов, память старых бойцов, дух Москвы и твердыня Полтавы
[UoN]Sentinel
Profile Blog Joined November 2009
United States11320 Posts
January 05 2010 04:16 GMT
#1346
Also a confession: I jack off with my left hand because my right is moving Zealots around.
Нас зовет дух отцов, память старых бойцов, дух Москвы и твердыня Полтавы
thunk
Profile Blog Joined March 2008
United States6233 Posts
January 05 2010 04:30 GMT
#1347
On January 05 2010 06:50 GHOSTCLAW wrote:
I'm terrible at starcraft compared to how much I follow, watch, and play the game.

But I still love it.


Confessions imply people don't know it already.
Every time Jung Myung Hoon builds a vulture, two probes die. || My post count was a palindrome and I was never posting again.
LuMiX
Profile Blog Joined October 2006
China5757 Posts
January 05 2010 05:38 GMT
#1348
^ rofl thunk~! so mean!! haha
Roffles *
Profile Blog Joined April 2007
Pitcairn19291 Posts
January 05 2010 05:44 GMT
#1349
I sadly love looking at Flash, because everytime I see him, I'm reminded of Nicole from Kara and how they look so similar in that one picture of hers.
God Bless
[UoN]Sentinel
Profile Blog Joined November 2009
United States11320 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-01-05 17:57:36
January 05 2010 17:16 GMT
#1350
I'm 13 and look 20 if nobody can see my eyes.

Also, I shot the sheriff.
Нас зовет дух отцов, память старых бойцов, дух Москвы и твердыня Полтавы
meathook
Profile Joined December 2007
1289 Posts
January 05 2010 22:23 GMT
#1351
I've caught myself laughing at physics jokes more than one time.
An ugly planet. A bug planet.
[UoN]Sentinel
Profile Blog Joined November 2009
United States11320 Posts
January 06 2010 02:52 GMT
#1352
This is like my eighth or ninth:

I have fantasized about Lady GaGa in full knowledge she has a dick.
Нас зовет дух отцов, память старых бойцов, дух Москвы и твердыня Полтавы
Archaic
Profile Blog Joined March 2008
United States4024 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-01-06 02:59:50
January 06 2010 02:54 GMT
#1353
On January 06 2010 07:23 meathook wrote:
I've caught myself laughing at physics jokes more than one time.

How is this a confession?! Physics jokes are so good...
+ Show Spoiler [>1 Line] +
There was a horse race, and there were three people, a doctor, a mathematician, and a physicist. They decided to do some work in their respected field to figure out which horse would win the race. The doctor went into the stable, and measured all of the horses sizes, heart rate, blood pressure, etc., made his prediction, and bought his ticket. The mathematician took out a calculator and started make some calculations based off the horses' past patterns and performance, derived a prediction, and bought his ticket. The physicist took out a piece of paper and started to scribble out formulas, made a prediction, and bought his ticket. After the race, the physicist had made the correct prediction. As he was leaving with his prize money, the doctor and mathematician followed him and asked him if they could see his calculations on how he managed to make the correct predictions. He agreed and gave them the paper.
It read:
+ Show Spoiler +
"First, assume all horses are spherical."
Vestige
Profile Joined November 2009
United States303 Posts
January 06 2010 05:13 GMT
#1354
i get all my jokes from lame t-shirts on snorgtees :D and im proud of it :D
"You'd wish it were hell"
[UoN]Sentinel
Profile Blog Joined November 2009
United States11320 Posts
January 08 2010 17:16 GMT
#1355
On January 06 2010 11:54 Archaic wrote:
Show nested quote +
On January 06 2010 07:23 meathook wrote:
I've caught myself laughing at physics jokes more than one time.

How is this a confession?! Physics jokes are so good...
+ Show Spoiler [>1 Line] +
There was a horse race, and there were three people, a doctor, a mathematician, and a physicist. They decided to do some work in their respected field to figure out which horse would win the race. The doctor went into the stable, and measured all of the horses sizes, heart rate, blood pressure, etc., made his prediction, and bought his ticket. The mathematician took out a calculator and started make some calculations based off the horses' past patterns and performance, derived a prediction, and bought his ticket. The physicist took out a piece of paper and started to scribble out formulas, made a prediction, and bought his ticket. After the race, the physicist had made the correct prediction. As he was leaving with his prize money, the doctor and mathematician followed him and asked him if they could see his calculations on how he managed to make the correct predictions. He agreed and gave them the paper.
It read:
+ Show Spoiler +
"First, assume all horses are spherical."


That's interesting... Usually the mathematician is the subject of the punchline.
Нас зовет дух отцов, память старых бойцов, дух Москвы и твердыня Полтавы
meteorskunk
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
Canada546 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-01-08 19:03:35
January 08 2010 19:01 GMT
#1356
Girl Blog Credentials: Comfortable talking to some women. Tried the sex once
HaXXspetten
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
Sweden15718 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-01-08 21:40:21
January 08 2010 21:40 GMT
#1357
I have sort of a paranoia to keep my threads alive for as long as possible... if they fall out of the top 5 most recently posted in, thus they aren't visible on the sidebar, I go to it and post something in my own thread to bring it back up and hopefully get more viewers...

...Do I have a problem about getting attention or what? I thought only powerhungry maniacs and chicks had that problem... oh wait, they're the same thing. xD
IceCube
Profile Blog Joined June 2009
Croatia1403 Posts
January 08 2010 22:08 GMT
#1358
On January 05 2010 10:46 Ilikestarcraft wrote:
opponent: hahaha wtf are you playing with? Your dick?
me: tyuedas
opponent: wait what?

I roflrolled! EPIC
Forever Vulture.. :(
fusionsdf
Profile Blog Joined June 2006
Canada15390 Posts
January 08 2010 22:39 GMT
#1359
wish I was a girl
SKT_Best: "I actually chose Protoss because it was so hard for me to defeat Protoss as a Terran. When I first started Brood War, my main race was Terran."
Lovin
Profile Joined May 2009
Denmark812 Posts
Last Edited: 2010-01-08 23:01:22
January 08 2010 23:00 GMT
#1360
On January 09 2010 07:39 fusionsdf wrote:
wish I was a girl


Just for Teh Mad StweedQwed on TL?
AKA SuddenSalad
Prev 1 66 67 68 69 70 209 Next
Please log in or register to reply.
Live Events Refresh
Next event in 2h 3m
[ Submit Event ]
Live Streams
Refresh
StarCraft 2
mouzHeroMarine 462
ProTech152
BRAT_OK 58
CosmosSc2 39
StarCraft: Brood War
Sea 320
Artosis 1
Dota 2
monkeys_forever305
canceldota87
Super Smash Bros
hungrybox206
Other Games
Grubby4696
shahzam630
FrodaN510
C9.Mang0257
mouzStarbuck222
ROOTCatZ161
Trikslyr44
ViBE29
OptimusSC211
minikerr3
Organizations
Dota 2
PGL Dota 2 - Main Stream2639
Other Games
BasetradeTV239
StarCraft 2
Blizzard YouTube
StarCraft: Brood War
BSLTrovo
[ Show 17 non-featured ]
StarCraft 2
• Hupsaiya 62
• musti20045 32
• Kozan
• LaughNgamezSOOP
• sooper7s
• AfreecaTV YouTube
• intothetv
• Migwel
• IndyKCrew
StarCraft: Brood War
• FirePhoenix7
• STPLYoutube
• ZZZeroYoutube
• BSLYoutube
Dota 2
• masondota2716
League of Legends
• TFBlade1232
Other Games
• imaqtpie1055
• Shiphtur275
Upcoming Events
PiGosaur Cup
2h 3m
Replay Cast
11h 3m
The PondCast
1d 12h
OSC
2 days
CranKy Ducklings
2 days
GSL
3 days
Maru vs ShoWTimE
Classic vs Reynor
herO vs Lambo
Solar vs Clem
BSL22 NKC (BSL vs China)
3 days
XuanXuan vs Jaystar
Mihu vs Messiah
eOnzErG vs Dewalt
Bonyth vs Jaystar
TerrOr vs Messiah
XuanXuan vs Mihu
eOnzErG vs Jaystar
Replay Cast
4 days
GSL
4 days
Patches Events
4 days
[ Show More ]
BSL22 NKC (BSL vs China)
4 days
Dewalt vs Messiah
Bonyth vs Mihu
TerrOr vs XuanXuan
eOnzErG vs Messiah
Jaystar vs Mihu
Dewalt vs XuanXuan
Bonyth vs TerrOr
Replay Cast
5 days
WardiTV Weekly
5 days
Sparkling Tuna Cup
6 days
Liquipedia Results

Completed

Proleague 2026-06-15
uThermal 2v2 2026 Main Event
Heroes Pulsing #1

Ongoing

IPSL Spring 2026
KCM Race Survival 2026 Season 2
Acropolis #4
CSCL: Masked Kings S4
YSL S3
BSL 22 Non-Korean Championship
SCTL 2026 Spring
Maestros of the Game 2
WardiTV Spring 2026
Murky Cup 2026
Heroes Pulsing #2
IEM Cologne Major 2026
Stake Ranked Episode 2
CS Asia Championships 2026
Asian Champions League 2026
IEM Atlanta 2026
PGL Astana 2026
BLAST Rivals Spring 2026
IEM Rio 2026
PGL Bucharest 2026
Stake Ranked Episode 1

Upcoming

CSL 2026 Summer (S21)
CSLAN 4
Blizzard Classic Cup 2026
Kung Fu Cup 2026 Grand Finals
RSL Revival: Season 6
CranK Gathers Season 4: BW vs SC2 Team League
HSC XXIX
Douyu Cup 2026
BCC 2026
Heroes Pulsing #3
BLAST Open Fall 2026
Esports World Cup 2026
BLAST Bounty Summer 2026
BLAST Bounty Summer Qual
Stake Ranked Episode 3
XSE Pro League 2026
TLPD

1. ByuN
2. TY
3. Dark
4. Solar
5. Stats
6. Nerchio
7. sOs
8. soO
9. INnoVation
10. Elazer
1. Rain
2. Flash
3. EffOrt
4. Last
5. Bisu
6. Soulkey
7. Mini
8. Sharp
Sidebar Settings...

Advertising | Privacy Policy | Terms Of Use | Contact Us

Original banner artwork: Jim Warren
The contents of this webpage are copyright © 2026 TLnet. All Rights Reserved.