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Active: 24189 users

Fit to Lick?

Forum Index > Closed
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MyNameISYUMMY
Profile Joined June 2012
2 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 17:53:25
July 04 2012 04:08 GMT
#1
--- Nuked ---
mikell
Profile Joined August 2010
Australia352 Posts
July 04 2012 04:09 GMT
#2
WHAT!?
drone hard
Spray
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
United States402 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 04:10:54
July 04 2012 04:10 GMT
#3
I lost it at ingrown hairs. Get one of those toilets that spray water to clean your anus off.
HuK Fighting~~!
Praetorial
Profile Blog Joined May 2011
United States4241 Posts
July 04 2012 04:10 GMT
#4
What the
FOR GREAT JUSTICE! Bans for the ban gods!
Cuh
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
United States403 Posts
July 04 2012 04:10 GMT
#5
blog
MarineKing | Nestea | MC
GDbushido
Profile Joined March 2011
United States926 Posts
July 04 2012 04:10 GMT
#6
I remember a thread just like this back during my Vesti days...oh to be a 14 year old troll again
remember not to think too much and your trip will be numbingly pleasant
Xenocide_Knight
Profile Blog Joined January 2008
Korea (South)2625 Posts
July 04 2012 04:11 GMT
#7
Does anyone else remember some blog post similar to this? It was like a recommendation not to shave your butt area and his personal experiences as to why.
Shine[Kal] #1 fan
MyNameISYUMMY
Profile Joined June 2012
2 Posts
July 04 2012 04:12 GMT
#8
--- Nuked ---
_Darwin_
Profile Joined August 2010
United States2374 Posts
July 04 2012 04:13 GMT
#9
oh no
I cant stop lactating
Tatari
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
United States1179 Posts
July 04 2012 04:13 GMT
#10
I decide to visit Teamliquid while eating a sandwich, and the first thread I see is this.

What is this I don't even...
A fed jungler is no longer a jungler, but a terrorist.
alderamin
Profile Joined June 2012
80 Posts
July 04 2012 04:14 GMT
#11
Shave and use wet towerpaper.
Whole
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States6046 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 04:15:30
July 04 2012 04:14 GMT
#12
as stupid as this sounds...I can actually relate to the OP's problem...

OP, recently I've been using baby wipes if it is particularly annoying, but most times, I just have to accept being less thorough.
Waxangel
Profile Blog Joined September 2002
United States33280 Posts
July 04 2012 04:14 GMT
#13
On July 04 2012 13:10 Spray wrote:
I lost it at ingrown hairs. Get one of those toilets that spray water to clean your anus off.


I agree, a bidet seems like a good investment if cleanliness is that big a concern
AdministratorHey HP can you redo everything youve ever done because i have a small complaint?
MadProbe
Profile Joined February 2012
United States269 Posts
July 04 2012 04:14 GMT
#14
use a damp washcloth instead of toilet paper. your asshole will be grateful AND very clean. or so i've heard from other weird people like you.
ecstatica
Profile Blog Joined February 2012
United States542 Posts
July 04 2012 04:15 GMT
#15
If youre truly eastern european you shouldnt worry about wiping
NeMeSiS3, Portlandian, Reason,
Mesha
Profile Blog Joined January 2010
Bosnia-Herzegovina439 Posts
July 04 2012 04:16 GMT
#16
I read what you wrote but not sure i quite understand what you want to ask us all. I think the issue is a matter of personal hygene. There are people who don't give a fuck about it and people who take care of it like civilised human beings.

The weird stuff you are doing to your bumhole with wiping and stuff has easy solution - its called bathroom bidet or if you don't have one use the shower or something - you ll be nice and clean and stop hurting yourself.

I can't belive i am responding to this post... but whatever. You say you Eastern descent and you are wiping - that's like a huge troll alarm because most the muslims (if that's what eastern is implying) prefer to wash and avoid wiping.

ccc
Reality hits you hard bro.
jax1492
Profile Joined November 2009
United States1632 Posts
July 04 2012 04:17 GMT
#17
wtf is this ...
anrimayu
Profile Joined June 2011
United States875 Posts
July 04 2012 04:18 GMT
#18
bidet is the way to go.
If you're into organic all natural stuff, try using leaves or rabbit fur.
☆*:.。. o(≧▽≦)o .。.:*☆
Steelavocado
Profile Joined May 2010
United States2123 Posts
July 04 2012 04:19 GMT
#19
Get a bidet. They are pretty common in Europe no?
MIRACLE IS YOUR TI7 CHAMP
Tiegrr
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
United States607 Posts
July 04 2012 04:19 GMT
#20
I read the poll and voted for the worst answer.
Feijichang
Profile Joined April 2010
China167 Posts
July 04 2012 04:19 GMT
#21
Wipe till you bleed. That's my motto.
FinestHour
Profile Joined August 2010
United States18466 Posts
July 04 2012 04:20 GMT
#22
how still open
thug life.                                                       MVP/ex-
Lavalamp799
Profile Joined March 2011
United States554 Posts
July 04 2012 04:21 GMT
#23
Just poop right before you get in the shower each day, and clean up in there. If you have to go sometime after your shower, just hold it in until tomorrow.
Khrey
Profile Joined April 2011
United States38 Posts
July 04 2012 04:22 GMT
#24
My entire ass is hairy (that means my ass cheeks too) and I wont stop wiping until there is no color on the toilet paper besides white. The left, right and middle of my asshole. Baby wipes help a lot.

-USA!!!

autoexec
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
United States530 Posts
July 04 2012 04:22 GMT
#25
Darn my Slovak descent...
1Eris1
Profile Joined September 2010
United States5797 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 05:45:36
July 04 2012 04:22 GMT
#26
Just shower afterwards.
Known Aliases: Tyragon, Valeric ~MSL Forever, SKT is truly the Superior KT!
Khrey
Profile Joined April 2011
United States38 Posts
July 04 2012 04:24 GMT
#27
On July 04 2012 13:13 Tatari wrote:
I decide to visit Teamliquid while eating a sandwich, and the first thread I see is this.

What is this I don't even...

I've watched people taking a shit, saw the poop come out directly out of there asshole, while eating, and it doesn't bother me at all.
LittleAtari
Profile Joined August 2010
Jordan1090 Posts
July 04 2012 04:24 GMT
#28
lol at thread.

keep a gardening bucket in your bathroom. Fill it with water when you use the toilet and use that in conjunction with wiping. I've been in houses where people have attached bidet sprays to their toilet. You can mix in mild soap if needed.
GrayGhost
Profile Joined February 2011
United States72 Posts
July 04 2012 04:24 GMT
#29
On July 04 2012 13:18 anrimayu wrote:
bidet is the way to go.
If you're into organic all natural stuff, try using leaves or rabbit fur.

lol rabbit fur. ... i recommend using wet TP after you get it mostly clean. just to finish up and leave a nice clean feeling
Theta Chi
Genesis Brood
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States193 Posts
July 04 2012 04:24 GMT
#30
I chafe too when I wipe too hard. The solution is to just pack the crack with toilet paper so that the skin doesn't rub on itself. Don't use too much to the point where its heavy and will fall down through the leg of your pants. Use just enough so that the tension between your butt cheeks keep the paper in place. If you're wearing briefs or non-boxers, u can use more since the underwear will keep it from falling. If you use too much though, it might make a noise while you walk.
I'll love you like I love the palm of my hand.
achristes
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
Norway653 Posts
July 04 2012 04:25 GMT
#31
Please don't close, I see potential!
youtube.com/spooderm4n | twitch.tv/spooderm4n | Random videos and games I feel like uploading
Antisocialmunky
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States5912 Posts
July 04 2012 04:25 GMT
#32
Did the Romanians just try to sarcasm and we aren't getting it?
[゚n゚] SSSSssssssSSsss ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Marine/Raven Guide:http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=163605
autoexec
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
United States530 Posts
July 04 2012 04:27 GMT
#33
On a serious note, if you do chafe, just put loads of "Gold Bond Body Powder" (or a similar product) on the chafed area. Works wonders for me.
Aerisky
Profile Blog Joined May 2012
United States12129 Posts
July 04 2012 04:27 GMT
#34
I don't think I would want to lick it regardless of how clean it is. @_@

What a cringe-inducing thread >_< that really sounds like it sucks, I think a bidet would help with your problem though?
Jim while Johnny had had had had had had had; had had had had the better effect on the teacher.
Al Bundy
Profile Joined April 2010
7257 Posts
July 04 2012 04:28 GMT
#35
TL General Forum never fails to deliver.
o choro é livre
TyrantPotato
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
Australia1541 Posts
July 04 2012 04:29 GMT
#36
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Douche

im sure the device could be used to assist in your situation.
Forever ZeNEX.
thrawn2112
Profile Blog Joined June 2010
United States6918 Posts
July 04 2012 04:30 GMT
#37
find a way to circumvent pooping
"People think they know all these things about other people, and if you ask them why they think they know that, it'd be hard for them to be convincing." ES
XoXiDe
Profile Joined September 2006
United States620 Posts
July 04 2012 04:31 GMT
#38
https://www.cottonelle.com/cottonelle-fresh-care-wipes.aspx
TEXAN
{ToT}ColmA
Profile Joined November 2007
Japan3260 Posts
July 04 2012 04:33 GMT
#39
how do people shave on that spot, i find it difficult to do so...on a sidenote, your name is yummy, what a delicate post of u :3
The only virgins in kpop left are the fans
DrThorMD
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
Canada359 Posts
July 04 2012 04:33 GMT
#40
Brilliant. Absolutely Brilliant.
Damn your Chronoboosts!
jdseemoreglass
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
United States3773 Posts
July 04 2012 04:38 GMT
#41
It's only fit to lick if you've just gotten out of the shower and you really scrubbed down there with soap. Paper will never cut it if lickin is your goal. If you lick and get a little taste, just pretend there was nothing there and stay away from that region without making it too obvious to her that she's not sparkly clean.
"If you want this forum to be full of half-baked philosophy discussions between pompous faggots like yourself forever, stay the course captain vanilla" - FakeSteve[TPR], 2006
SunTurtle
Profile Blog Joined January 2012
156 Posts
July 04 2012 04:38 GMT
#42
This is like the NaDa's body thread. right now it seems super weird, but in the future it will be legendary.
iAmiAnC
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
United Kingdom317 Posts
July 04 2012 04:38 GMT
#43
Wouldn't recommend trying to flush any kind of wipes down the toilet btw, I managed to flood the place doing that.
http://www.twitch.tv/iamianc <- High master EU terran stream /w commentary!
Leth0
Profile Joined February 2012
856 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 04:42:31
July 04 2012 04:39 GMT
#44
Not sure about others but my bowel movements are pretty regular. I usually take a nice dump sometime after waking up and before showering before heading to work. This affords me the opportunity to do a 2nd cleaning after the obvious 'wipe away'. I keep a seperate wash cloth for my genitals / taint/ and butt. I'm also a hairy person but I've never had issues with 'mud butt' as some would call it, then again I have a healthy balanced diet that consists of a fair amount of greens. I would suggest adding more celery into you diet. Celery is like natures toothbrush for your asshole. Hope this helps, cheers, and happy wiping. =)

Also, I don't think any asshole in the world is ever 'fit to lick'. Even those women who bleech their asshole....it doesn't matter what a person does to themselves, your asshole is always going to taste like shit (not speaking from experience just seems obvious)
SEA KarMa
Profile Joined October 2010
Australia452 Posts
July 04 2012 04:40 GMT
#45
this is slightly disturbing, even for the general thread.
"terrible, terrible damage". terrible, terrible design.
FSKi
Profile Blog Joined November 2011
United States901 Posts
July 04 2012 04:42 GMT
#46
--- Nuked ---
polyphonyEX
Profile Joined May 2012
United States2539 Posts
July 04 2012 04:44 GMT
#47
I like my anus to be yummy
AcrosstheSky
Profile Joined January 2011
United States237 Posts
July 04 2012 04:44 GMT
#48
I'm sorry...WHAT?
HolyArrow
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States7116 Posts
July 04 2012 04:44 GMT
#49
what
bjornkavist
Profile Blog Joined June 2009
Canada1235 Posts
July 04 2012 04:45 GMT
#50
I've missed random shit like this on TL, loving this thread
https://soundcloud.com/bbols
Diks
Profile Joined January 2010
Belgium1880 Posts
July 04 2012 04:47 GMT
#51
Right now people don't realise how funny this is, but in 5 years, when somebody will bump out the thread, it'll be histerical laugh all over the interwebz
Velocirapture
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
United States983 Posts
July 04 2012 04:47 GMT
#52
I am really surprised this thread is still open. That said, as a gay man, I can verify that extra steps are necessary to be as clean as you desire. Apart from more extreme measures Id say that baby wipes (after normal wiping) give the best standard result.
AnachronisticAnarchy
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
United States2957 Posts
July 04 2012 04:50 GMT
#53
BWHAHAHAHA.
Butt seriously, you really should learn to, you know, not damage your anus with toilet paper. Look, I know hair makes things difficult, but I have a lot of hair there too, and I have not had to bleed from there once to have a clean bum.
"How are you?" "I am fine, because it is not normal to scream in pain."
McFeser
Profile Joined July 2011
United States2458 Posts
July 04 2012 04:54 GMT
#54
If this guy really had a hairy ass he'd know it's impossible to tell if it's clean enough.
Promethelax still hasn't changed his quote
Anacletus
Profile Blog Joined April 2012
United States733 Posts
July 04 2012 04:55 GMT
#55
wtf did I just read
http://talk-to-stimey-please.1324083.n2.nabble.com/
PrinceXizor
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States17713 Posts
July 04 2012 04:56 GMT
#56
On July 04 2012 13:47 Diks wrote:
Right now people don't realise how funny this is, but in 5 years, when somebody will bump out the thread, it'll be histerical laugh all over the interwebz

exactly, this thread will be the Day9 Airplane story or any of the random poorly drawn comics in the bw section of the new school TLers.

Also, Use an electric trimmer on your butt/legs to cut it super close and then use a foiled electric razor to clean up the rest, as long as you don't push too hard, you won't get any ingrown hairs if you do the two step process. don't put the hair down a drain, stand in a trash bag or be extremely careful so you don't have to clean everything covered in hair. This method also works for chest/back hair as well.

Source: Worked for school swim team.
iamahydralisk
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States813 Posts
July 04 2012 04:56 GMT
#57
why
"well if youre looking for long term, go safe, if you expect it to end either way, go risky. wow. just like sc2" - friend of mine when I asked him which girl to pick
Shikyo
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
Finland33997 Posts
July 04 2012 04:56 GMT
#58
This post along with the username, I'm dying =D 5/5 would read again.
League of Legends EU West, Platinum III | Yousei Teikoku is the best thing that has ever happened to music.
-Switch-
Profile Joined August 2010
Canada506 Posts
July 04 2012 04:57 GMT
#59
hahahahaha.... wtf
hacklebeast
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States5090 Posts
July 04 2012 04:57 GMT
#60
On July 04 2012 13:38 SunTurtle wrote:
This is like the NaDa's body thread. right now it seems super weird, but in the future it will be legendary.


That implies that in the future this thread will be filled with 200+ pages of progamer wiping techniques.
Protoss: Best, Paralyze, Jangbi, Nal_Ra || Terran: Oov, Boxer, Fantasy, Hiya|| Zerg: Yellow, Zero
FuGGu
Profile Joined March 2012
United States176 Posts
July 04 2012 05:00 GMT
#61
LOL.


....but seriously, should I wipe it until it's fit to lick?
Zapdos_Smithh
Profile Blog Joined October 2008
Canada2620 Posts
July 04 2012 05:00 GMT
#62
On July 04 2012 13:19 Feijichang wrote:
Wipe till you bleed. That's my motto.


BAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

On another note, this thread is kinda disgusting...made me a bit sick to my stomach. This isn't really SFW either.
CrazyAsian
Profile Joined October 2010
United States188 Posts
July 04 2012 05:02 GMT
#63
On July 04 2012 13:19 Feijichang wrote:
Wipe till you bleed. That's my motto.


Got a good laugh out of that one, thanks for that.
weeA
Profile Joined October 2010
India442 Posts
July 04 2012 05:05 GMT
#64
What did i just read
Lim Yo Hwan I love U
Probulous
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
Australia3894 Posts
July 04 2012 05:06 GMT
#65
This thread is surprisingly different...
"Dude has some really interesting midgame switches that I wouldn't have expected. "I violated your house" into "HIHO THE DAIRY OH!" really threw me. You don't usually expect children's poetry harass as a follow up " - AmericanUmlaut
dragoon
Profile Joined December 2010
United States695 Posts
July 04 2012 05:09 GMT
#66
NOPE
i love you
Millitron
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States2611 Posts
July 04 2012 05:11 GMT
#67
This was the OP's SECOND POST. He has only had one other post.

I don't exactly know what to say. Something complimentary though, that's for sure.
Who called in the fleet?
onewingedmoogle
Profile Joined June 2009
Canada434 Posts
July 04 2012 05:13 GMT
#68
On July 04 2012 13:47 Diks wrote:
Right now people don't realise how funny this is, but in 5 years, when somebody will bump out the thread, it'll be histerical laugh all over the interwebz


I'd disagree with you there, I'm laughing my ass off right now in the present. And let me tell you, I'm having the time of my life.
Oiseaux
Profile Joined May 2011
United States676 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 05:21:49
July 04 2012 05:14 GMT
#69
While I kind of was saying "wtf" as I read this, the sad thing is I can totally relate. I'm not Eastern European, but I'm 3rd generation Polish in America (current day Belarus, my grandfather had to gtfo of the area during WWII for obvious reasons). If you're to cheap to afford a bidet (as I am), you can always just make use of a detachable showerhead. I'll leave it at that.

edit: relate in the sense that I also have the same sort of chronic habit.
"[S]o be ready to kiss a few donkeys with glued-on paper horns during your unicorn hunt." -Some stupid 4x4 magazine
AllHailTheDead
Profile Joined July 2011
United States418 Posts
July 04 2012 05:16 GMT
#70
dear lord I dont even know what to....
Weebem-Na
Profile Joined May 2010
United States221 Posts
July 04 2012 05:18 GMT
#71
Maybe the issue could also be solved more cheaply by buying the nice toilet paper that is really soft and has lotion in it.
The reaction of boron-11 and plain hydrogen produces all its energy in the form of charged particles which can be directed by a magnetic field, but the reaction is very difficult to sustain and many fusion physicists doubt it will ever prove practical
Perception
Profile Joined August 2011
United States26 Posts
July 04 2012 05:21 GMT
#72
On July 04 2012 13:24 Khrey wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 04 2012 13:13 Tatari wrote:
I decide to visit Teamliquid while eating a sandwich, and the first thread I see is this.

What is this I don't even...

I've watched people taking a shit, saw the poop come out directly out of there asshole, while eating, and it doesn't bother me at all.



That's just fuckin' weird brah. =D
┻━┻ ︵╰(°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻
MichaelDonovan
Profile Joined June 2011
United States1453 Posts
July 04 2012 05:21 GMT
#73
I wipe it until it's fit to lick, and then I have your mother lick it to make sure. BOOOOOOOOOOOOOM
MugenXBanksy
Profile Joined April 2011
United States479 Posts
July 04 2012 05:24 GMT
#74
dafuq...........................
we all hope to be like whitera one day
Deleted User 3420
Profile Blog Joined May 2003
24492 Posts
July 04 2012 05:24 GMT
#75
what i learned from this is that OP seems to have an interest in licking buttholes
Clazziquai10
Profile Blog Joined August 2011
Singapore1949 Posts
July 04 2012 05:25 GMT
#76
.....................................................wtf did i just read............................... :S
SavageReborn
Profile Joined September 2010
Australia106 Posts
July 04 2012 05:25 GMT
#77
I am never going to wipe my ass the same again.
Savage1 on irc.rizon.net || UWA Anime Club: www.uwanime.org
Nightops
Profile Joined November 2011
United States66 Posts
July 04 2012 05:26 GMT
#78
Just take a shower
SlayerS | oGs | NaDa | Mvp | fOrGG | MKP
iXphobos
Profile Joined July 2010
Germany1464 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 05:28:57
July 04 2012 05:27 GMT
#79
On July 04 2012 13:57 hacklebeast wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 04 2012 13:38 SunTurtle wrote:
This is like the NaDa's body thread. right now it seems super weird, but in the future it will be legendary.


That implies that in the future this thread will be filled with 200+ pages of progamer wiping techniques.

Dude, Flash wipes so fast, you can not even see...

Btw, OP should be: "How do you remove creep?"
Oiseaux
Profile Joined May 2011
United States676 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 05:30:46
July 04 2012 05:29 GMT
#80
On July 04 2012 13:39 Leth0 wrote:
Also, I don't think any asshole in the world is ever 'fit to lick'. Even those women who bleech their asshole....it doesn't matter what a person does to themselves, your asshole is always going to taste like shit (not speaking from experience just seems obvious)


1a). If they're clean, they don't.
1b). Bleaching isn't required
2). You don't know what you're missing.


On July 04 2012 13:38 SunTurtle wrote:
Btw, OP should be: "How do you remove creep?"


win
"[S]o be ready to kiss a few donkeys with glued-on paper horns during your unicorn hunt." -Some stupid 4x4 magazine
Uncultured
Profile Joined September 2010
United States1340 Posts
July 04 2012 05:30 GMT
#81
Nair your asshole. Hair slips right off. Only have to do it once in a while
Don't you rage when you lose too? -FruitDealer
MichaelDonovan
Profile Joined June 2011
United States1453 Posts
July 04 2012 05:31 GMT
#82
On July 04 2012 14:30 Uncultured wrote:
Nair your asshole. Hair slips right off. Only have to do it once in a while

Uhhh...I don't think that's a good idea. I've heard of people nairing their balls and it burns so painfully that they want to cut them off. And if you consider the fact that the OP's ass hole is raw/cut up from his thorough wiping, nair would be a terrible idea. Unless he video tapes it. Then that would be funny enough to watch so that it would be worth his sacrifice.
drshdwpuppet
Profile Joined July 2011
United States332 Posts
July 04 2012 05:32 GMT
#83
On July 04 2012 14:30 Uncultured wrote:
Nair your asshole. Hair slips right off. Only have to do it once in a while


dont.

do this... just trust me okay?
Enterprise was just temp banned for 1 week by Myles. Reason: You aren't a philosopher and warning aren't cutting it.
Oiseaux
Profile Joined May 2011
United States676 Posts
July 04 2012 05:32 GMT
#84
On July 04 2012 14:30 Uncultured wrote:
Nair your asshole. Hair slips right off. Only have to do it once in a while



As the last few posters have said, not a good idea.
"[S]o be ready to kiss a few donkeys with glued-on paper horns during your unicorn hunt." -Some stupid 4x4 magazine
Uncultured
Profile Joined September 2010
United States1340 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 05:35:00
July 04 2012 05:33 GMT
#85
On July 04 2012 14:32 Oiseaux wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 04 2012 14:30 Uncultured wrote:
Nair your asshole. Hair slips right off. Only have to do it once in a while



As the last few posters have said, not a good idea.



Get the stuff for sensitive areas. I do it all the time. Works great.


Alternative is getting Preparation H wipes. Or any sort of wet wipes that are flushable.
Don't you rage when you lose too? -FruitDealer
arb
Profile Blog Joined April 2008
Noobville17920 Posts
July 04 2012 05:33 GMT
#86
what the fuck
Artillery spawned from the forges of Hell
MichaelDonovan
Profile Joined June 2011
United States1453 Posts
July 04 2012 05:34 GMT
#87
On July 04 2012 14:33 Uncultured wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 04 2012 14:32 Oiseaux wrote:
On July 04 2012 14:30 Uncultured wrote:
Nair your asshole. Hair slips right off. Only have to do it once in a while



As the last few posters have said, not a good idea.



Get the stuff for sensitive areas. I do it all the time. Works great.


OP!! Don't listen to this guy. He wants to set your asshole on fire.
Oiseaux
Profile Joined May 2011
United States676 Posts
July 04 2012 05:35 GMT
#88
On July 04 2012 14:33 Uncultured wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 04 2012 14:32 Oiseaux wrote:
On July 04 2012 14:30 Uncultured wrote:
Nair your asshole. Hair slips right off. Only have to do it once in a while



As the last few posters have said, not a good idea.



Get the stuff for sensitive areas. I do it all the time. Works great.


Never checked out Nair that thoroughly, didn't realize they had a sensitive area version. I'll keep it in mind if I break my phobia of it.
"[S]o be ready to kiss a few donkeys with glued-on paper horns during your unicorn hunt." -Some stupid 4x4 magazine
SnipedSoul
Profile Joined November 2010
Canada2158 Posts
July 04 2012 05:36 GMT
#89
Get a dog.
InFkHand
Profile Joined March 2011
Canada46 Posts
July 04 2012 05:37 GMT
#90
oh my fuck
hard work beats talent until talent starts working hard
MichaelDonovan
Profile Joined June 2011
United States1453 Posts
July 04 2012 05:37 GMT
#91
On July 04 2012 14:36 SnipedSoul wrote:
Get a dog.

...The fuck
Uncultured
Profile Joined September 2010
United States1340 Posts
July 04 2012 05:37 GMT
#92
On July 04 2012 14:34 MichaelDonovan wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 04 2012 14:33 Uncultured wrote:
On July 04 2012 14:32 Oiseaux wrote:
On July 04 2012 14:30 Uncultured wrote:
Nair your asshole. Hair slips right off. Only have to do it once in a while



As the last few posters have said, not a good idea.



Get the stuff for sensitive areas. I do it all the time. Works great.


OP!! Don't listen to this guy. He wants to set your asshole on fire.



You've obviously never eaten extremely hot peppers. Now THAT burns the butthole. Worst Nair ever did for me was mild warmness and a pleasant tingling sensation. Shit it's practically like KY Warming Sensation. You might as well get off while removing your hair.

That's the epitome of two birds, one stone, my friend.
Don't you rage when you lose too? -FruitDealer
Oiseaux
Profile Joined May 2011
United States676 Posts
July 04 2012 05:38 GMT
#93
On July 04 2012 14:37 Uncultured wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 04 2012 14:34 MichaelDonovan wrote:
On July 04 2012 14:33 Uncultured wrote:
On July 04 2012 14:32 Oiseaux wrote:
On July 04 2012 14:30 Uncultured wrote:
Nair your asshole. Hair slips right off. Only have to do it once in a while



As the last few posters have said, not a good idea.



Get the stuff for sensitive areas. I do it all the time. Works great.


OP!! Don't listen to this guy. He wants to set your asshole on fire.



You've obviously never eaten extremely hot peppers. Now THAT burns the butthole. Worst Nair ever did for me was mild warmness and a pleasant tingling sensation. Shit it's practically like KY Warming Sensation. You might as well get off while removing your hair.

That's the epitome of two birds, one stone, my friend.


I like you, lol.
"[S]o be ready to kiss a few donkeys with glued-on paper horns during your unicorn hunt." -Some stupid 4x4 magazine
MichaelDonovan
Profile Joined June 2011
United States1453 Posts
July 04 2012 05:38 GMT
#94
On July 04 2012 14:37 Uncultured wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 04 2012 14:34 MichaelDonovan wrote:
On July 04 2012 14:33 Uncultured wrote:
On July 04 2012 14:32 Oiseaux wrote:
On July 04 2012 14:30 Uncultured wrote:
Nair your asshole. Hair slips right off. Only have to do it once in a while



As the last few posters have said, not a good idea.



Get the stuff for sensitive areas. I do it all the time. Works great.


OP!! Don't listen to this guy. He wants to set your asshole on fire.



You've obviously never eaten extremely hot peppers. Now THAT burns the butthole. Worst Nair ever did for me was mild warmness and a pleasant tingling sensation. Shit it's practically like KY Warming Sensation. You might as well get off while removing your hair.

That's the epitome of two birds, one stone, my friend.


But the second bird is going to be hit later anyway when his asshole gets licked right?
iamahydralisk
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States813 Posts
July 04 2012 05:39 GMT
#95
On July 04 2012 14:36 SnipedSoul wrote:
Get a dog.

aaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh


bailing the fuck out of here
"well if youre looking for long term, go safe, if you expect it to end either way, go risky. wow. just like sc2" - friend of mine when I asked him which girl to pick
[GiTM]-Ace
Profile Joined September 2002
United States4935 Posts
July 04 2012 05:39 GMT
#96
Use baby wipes yo
I may not be the best player right now but I think I can beat any 'best' players. I'll beat all the best players and become the best player. Watch me. - Jju
Vindicare605
Profile Blog Joined August 2011
United States16056 Posts
July 04 2012 05:40 GMT
#97
On July 04 2012 14:37 Uncultured wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 04 2012 14:34 MichaelDonovan wrote:
On July 04 2012 14:33 Uncultured wrote:
On July 04 2012 14:32 Oiseaux wrote:
On July 04 2012 14:30 Uncultured wrote:
Nair your asshole. Hair slips right off. Only have to do it once in a while



As the last few posters have said, not a good idea.



Get the stuff for sensitive areas. I do it all the time. Works great.


OP!! Don't listen to this guy. He wants to set your asshole on fire.



You've obviously never eaten extremely hot peppers. Now THAT burns the butthole. Worst Nair ever did for me was mild warmness and a pleasant tingling sensation. Shit it's practically like KY Warming Sensation. You might as well get off while removing your hair.

That's the epitome of two birds, one stone, my friend.


LOL.

This thread just turned into gold.
aka: KTVindicare the Geeky Bartender
Uncultured
Profile Joined September 2010
United States1340 Posts
July 04 2012 05:40 GMT
#98
On July 04 2012 14:38 MichaelDonovan wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 04 2012 14:37 Uncultured wrote:
On July 04 2012 14:34 MichaelDonovan wrote:
On July 04 2012 14:33 Uncultured wrote:
On July 04 2012 14:32 Oiseaux wrote:
On July 04 2012 14:30 Uncultured wrote:
Nair your asshole. Hair slips right off. Only have to do it once in a while



As the last few posters have said, not a good idea.



Get the stuff for sensitive areas. I do it all the time. Works great.


OP!! Don't listen to this guy. He wants to set your asshole on fire.



You've obviously never eaten extremely hot peppers. Now THAT burns the butthole. Worst Nair ever did for me was mild warmness and a pleasant tingling sensation. Shit it's practically like KY Warming Sensation. You might as well get off while removing your hair.

That's the epitome of two birds, one stone, my friend.


But the second bird is going to be hit later anyway when his asshole gets licked right?



Three birds, one stone. Shit just keeps getting better and better. And they say humanity isn't progressing, HAH.
Don't you rage when you lose too? -FruitDealer
Dreamer.T
Profile Joined December 2009
United States3584 Posts
July 04 2012 05:42 GMT
#99
OP is either the greatest troll in the world, or dead honest. Either way, bravo. Just clean with wet toilet paper, then with dry ones. Seems like it'll solve your huge crisis.
Forever the best, IMMvp <3
Oiseaux
Profile Joined May 2011
United States676 Posts
July 04 2012 05:43 GMT
#100
On July 04 2012 14:40 Uncultured wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 04 2012 14:38 MichaelDonovan wrote:
On July 04 2012 14:37 Uncultured wrote:
On July 04 2012 14:34 MichaelDonovan wrote:
On July 04 2012 14:33 Uncultured wrote:
On July 04 2012 14:32 Oiseaux wrote:
On July 04 2012 14:30 Uncultured wrote:
Nair your asshole. Hair slips right off. Only have to do it once in a while



As the last few posters have said, not a good idea.



Get the stuff for sensitive areas. I do it all the time. Works great.


OP!! Don't listen to this guy. He wants to set your asshole on fire.



You've obviously never eaten extremely hot peppers. Now THAT burns the butthole. Worst Nair ever did for me was mild warmness and a pleasant tingling sensation. Shit it's practically like KY Warming Sensation. You might as well get off while removing your hair.

That's the epitome of two birds, one stone, my friend.


But the second bird is going to be hit later anyway when his asshole gets licked right?



Three birds, one stone. Shit just keeps getting better and better. And they say humanity isn't progressing, HAH.


Your double entendre is too much to handle.
"[S]o be ready to kiss a few donkeys with glued-on paper horns during your unicorn hunt." -Some stupid 4x4 magazine
MichaelDonovan
Profile Joined June 2011
United States1453 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 11:57:18
July 04 2012 05:45 GMT
#101
mod edit

User was warned for this post (NSFW pic)
Tatari
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
United States1179 Posts
July 04 2012 05:45 GMT
#102
Can someone explain why Nair is considered a nogo? All I could find was that it's for hair removal...

On July 04 2012 14:37 Uncultured wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 04 2012 14:34 MichaelDonovan wrote:
On July 04 2012 14:33 Uncultured wrote:
On July 04 2012 14:32 Oiseaux wrote:
On July 04 2012 14:30 Uncultured wrote:
Nair your asshole. Hair slips right off. Only have to do it once in a while



As the last few posters have said, not a good idea.



Get the stuff for sensitive areas. I do it all the time. Works great.


OP!! Don't listen to this guy. He wants to set your asshole on fire.



You've obviously never eaten extremely hot peppers. Now THAT burns the butthole. Worst Nair ever did for me was mild warmness and a pleasant tingling sensation. Shit it's practically like KY Warming Sensation. You might as well get off while removing your hair.

That's the epitome of two birds, one stone, my friend.


^If this is the case I'm totally for it.
A fed jungler is no longer a jungler, but a terrorist.
SwizzY
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
United States1549 Posts
July 04 2012 05:46 GMT
#103
best worst thread. And trim/shave the hairs down. The dingleberries that form from a messy one is what really fucks you up in the toilet paper department. Might as well take a fuckin shower
All that glitters is not gold, all that wander are not lost, the old that is strong does not wither, deep roots are not reached by frost.
speedphlux
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
Bulgaria962 Posts
July 04 2012 05:48 GMT
#104
Intersting topic :D
What I do is just wipe the main part decent enough and then jump straight under the shower after each visit to the toilet. Usually it doesn't happen so I take a dump outside my home, so it's not a problem. If it does happen however, then it's "Wipe ! Wipe ! Wipe !" until your crack starts hurting pretty much.
Oh and I'm definately of the eastern european kind :/ Damn jungle ! It's tricky not to get "monkeys" there.
... Humanity Is Not What I Suffer From ...
Aerisky
Profile Blog Joined May 2012
United States12129 Posts
July 04 2012 05:54 GMT
#105
What in the actual fuck LOL

Who says TL moderators don't have a sense of humor ^^
Jim while Johnny had had had had had had had; had had had had the better effect on the teacher.
GrapeD
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
Canada679 Posts
July 04 2012 05:54 GMT
#106
I lost it at the title of the thread. Anyways you could trim it down there so it doesnt like pull on hairs and stuff as you wipe, might fix a couple problems.
Some people hurt people. I defenestrate those people.
SuddenlyRain
Profile Joined September 2011
Australia12 Posts
July 04 2012 05:55 GMT
#107
Thought I clicked on the 4th of July thread and this pops up. Dafuq? Hair removal cream your butthole dude. Problem solved.
Nothing is ever destroyed.
CajunMan
Profile Joined July 2010
United States823 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 05:57:57
July 04 2012 05:56 GMT
#108
On July 04 2012 13:10 Spray wrote:
I lost it at ingrown hairs. Get one of those toilets that spray water to clean your anus off.


Those are actually terrible I don't know how anyone gets there ass clean with that I just now have wet shit on my ass. I say shave your ass that's what I do man you gotta do what you gotta do sometimes. I don't think those Brazilian wax places give happy endings but never hurts to check otherwise do it yourself.

Also Nair can burn might not be the best idea.
Anacletus
Profile Blog Joined April 2012
United States733 Posts
July 04 2012 05:58 GMT
#109
if tongue fits I licks :3

[image loading]
http://talk-to-stimey-please.1324083.n2.nabble.com/
Bandino
Profile Joined August 2010
United States342 Posts
July 04 2012 06:04 GMT
#110
This tread has been one of the best reads on TL in a while. Though I must admit wiping it thoroughly clean can be a bit of a problem at times.
flamewheel
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
FREEAGLELAND26781 Posts
July 04 2012 06:08 GMT
#111
I normally don't like polluting general forum threads with my senseless spam, but this one deserves a heaping helping.

wat
Writerdamn, i was two days from retirement
Pholon
Profile Blog Joined March 2008
Netherlands6142 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 06:09:51
July 04 2012 06:09 GMT
#112
Don't wax. Once you get a sweaty crack your cheeks seal up vacuum shut and that's a whole different world of problems.

edit: I read this somewhere^
Moderator@TLPholon // "I need a third hand to facepalm right now"
MichaelDonovan
Profile Joined June 2011
United States1453 Posts
July 04 2012 06:11 GMT
#113
On July 04 2012 15:09 Pholon wrote:
Don't wax. Once you get a sweaty crack your cheeks seal up vacuum shut and that's a whole different world of problems.

edit: I read this somewhere^


Just gave me an idea. He could invest in a butt plug. Keep it plugged tight for like a week and then let it all out. He can then thoroughly wipe and then his ass will have a whole week to heal up before the next round.
StarStruck
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
25339 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 06:23:36
July 04 2012 06:14 GMT
#114
Been a while since I've seen a random thread like this. ._.

It's beyond me why you care so much about your assholes, lol.

Now let's all imagine the world without toilet paper.
FuDDx *
Profile Blog Joined October 2002
United States5008 Posts
July 04 2012 06:15 GMT
#115
Flush-able wipes like for the children?
https://www.facebook.com/pages/Balloon-Man-FuDD/237447769616965?ref=hl
Audemed
Profile Joined November 2010
United States893 Posts
July 04 2012 06:15 GMT
#116
What
The
Fuck

Also, lol.
"People sleep peaceably in their beds at night only because rough men stand ready to do violence on their behalf." -George Orwell
Talin
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Montenegro10532 Posts
July 04 2012 06:31 GMT
#117
I... I... am having breakfast.

For fucks sake.
Psychobabas
Profile Blog Joined March 2006
2531 Posts
July 04 2012 06:34 GMT
#118
hahaha

just use water in the shower
ControlMonkey
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
Australia3109 Posts
July 04 2012 06:40 GMT
#119
Obviously you need a colostomy bag for this. Gets rid of excrement without it ever passing through your anus!

Either that or stop eating altogether and get an artificial stomach.

Really those are the only two realistic options. But remember- consult your doctor before undertaking any drastic amateur procedures!
ChApFoU
Profile Blog Joined July 2004
France2982 Posts
July 04 2012 06:41 GMT
#120
Thread of the year ! I pissed myself xD
"I honestly think that whoever invented toilet paper in a genius" Kang Min
Mario1209
Profile Joined September 2010
United States1077 Posts
July 04 2012 06:49 GMT
#121
you could try using baby wipes instead of toilet paper?
Co-Manager of Soviet Gaming * http://twitter.com/#!/sGMarioo * http://www.facebook.com/SovietGamingfanpage * https://twitter.com/#!/SovietGaming
Scribble
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
2077 Posts
July 04 2012 06:50 GMT
#122
OP: The solution to your problem is to go back and read through this thread again in a year or 2.

After all, laughter is the best medicine.
wurm
Profile Joined October 2007
Philippines2296 Posts
July 04 2012 06:51 GMT
#123
I can't believe this topic and the Higgs particle topic are at the top of the General Forum. lol
I know where my towel is.
Bippzy
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
United States1466 Posts
July 04 2012 06:53 GMT
#124
On July 04 2012 15:41 ChApFoU wrote:
Thread of the year ! I pissed myself xD

Yeah im pretty much laughing maniacally, espiecially at the cat thats licks to fit...lol.

I vote nair.
LEENOCK LEENOCK LEENOCK LEENOCK LEENOCK LEENOCK LEENOCK LEENOCK LEENOCK LEENOCK LEENOCK LEENOCK
Scribble
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
2077 Posts
July 04 2012 06:54 GMT
#125
On July 04 2012 15:51 wurm wrote:
I can't believe this topic and the Higgs particle topic are at the top of the General Forum. lol


Right now, I see this, the Spiderman thread, Higgs, Korean Music, and ActivisionBlizzard being sold. Combining those 5 topics could make for some really fun creative writing prompts.
brinker
Profile Joined December 2011
45 Posts
July 04 2012 06:56 GMT
#126
I think this wins the thread of the year award by a landslide.
JerKy
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
Korea (South)3013 Posts
July 04 2012 07:05 GMT
#127
Hm. Im actually very self conscious of potentially being smelly in public, and I'd go with "When around the hole's clear, but wouldn't want to stick my tongue in it".

Ideally though, I take my main bathroom-event in the morning (usually sometime after I wake up) and shower afterwards so I'm the cleanest I can be.

As for what you said... ingrown hairs and stuff..? bleeding? How does that even happen? x_x
You can type "StarCraft" with just your left hand.
Kaonis
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
United States243 Posts
July 04 2012 07:12 GMT
#128
And lo, his great braided beard swung proudly from betwixt his cheeks, daring any other man to challenge his claim to the toilet paper!

Just take a shower after you go, if it's that bad.

I have the lower body of a chimpanzee, and I've never heard of it being that bad. What are you even eating?

As for preserving the wonderful aesthetic of the butt, just wax up to the bottom of your cheeks (stand so you can tell it apart)

Leave your legs, and there you go. Bare butt, forested legs, you'll look even manlier!

I have no idea what is going on.
Nevermind.
Prugelhugel
Profile Joined February 2012
Austria637 Posts
July 04 2012 07:13 GMT
#129
What the hell did I just read?

Next thread incoming: [G] How to whipe
"This map definitly needs more rocks" - No SC2 player ever
Zerothegreat
Profile Joined September 2010
United States787 Posts
July 04 2012 07:14 GMT
#130
Wipe with normal toilet paper and finish off with a baby wipe... How hard is that? It's pretty common actually.
Wafflelisk
Profile Joined October 2011
Canada1061 Posts
July 04 2012 07:16 GMT
#131
On July 04 2012 16:13 Prugelhugel wrote:
What the hell did I just read?

Next thread incoming: [G] How to whipe



.. that may or may not be a useful guide for other people who are definitely, 100% NOT me

>.> <.<
Waffles > Pancakes
fAnTaCy
Profile Blog Joined February 2008
United States893 Posts
July 04 2012 07:19 GMT
#132
This...is a quality thread..I approve = D
President of Doctor Helvetica Fan Club...PM to join. Members--4, Most recent: Archas
GhostLink
Profile Joined January 2011
United States450 Posts
July 04 2012 07:20 GMT
#133
lol
Let a man play chess, and tell him that every pawn is his friend. Let him think both bishops holy. Let him remember happy days in the shadows of his castles. Let him love his queen. Watch him lose them all.
CrazyF1r3f0x
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States2120 Posts
July 04 2012 07:24 GMT
#134
I love the poll options: "but I wouldn't stick my tongue in it"
"Actual happiness always looks pretty squalid in comparison with the overcompensations for misery."
DyEnasTy
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
United States3714 Posts
July 04 2012 07:27 GMT
#135
wth...... the title looked sexually oriented...... then i clicked open.....
Much better to die an awesome Terran than to live as a magic wielding fairy or a mindless sac of biological goop. -Manifesto7
NEEDZMOAR
Profile Blog Joined December 2011
Sweden1277 Posts
July 04 2012 07:35 GMT
#136
On July 04 2012 13:24 Khrey wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 04 2012 13:13 Tatari wrote:
I decide to visit Teamliquid while eating a sandwich, and the first thread I see is this.

What is this I don't even...

I've watched people taking a shit, saw the poop come out directly out of there asshole, while eating, and it doesn't bother me at all.



Good for.... no wait that's not it.... seek help! yeah that's better...


OT: As much as OP reeks of troll I can actually relate to this problem, due to anxiety and nervousness I tend to sometimes sweat around that area, which is why one needs to be 100% clean or it will smell, thing is if you wipe to much it will start to bleed, but use wet paper and then very gently use dry again, it will help a lot.
endy
Profile Blog Joined May 2009
Switzerland8970 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 07:41:19
July 04 2012 07:35 GMT
#137
I never take a shit if I can't take shower right after. So basically, no shit outside of home/hotel.

On July 04 2012 15:49 Mario1209 wrote:
you could try using baby wipes instead of toilet paper?


You can't flush baby wipes.
ॐ
Mortal
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
2943 Posts
July 04 2012 07:41 GMT
#138
Wait, no, seriously? This thread is WAY too good.
The universe created an audience for itself.
ChriS-X
Profile Joined June 2011
Malaysia1374 Posts
July 04 2012 07:44 GMT
#139
i opened this thread without knowing what i was going to expect. it went beyond the furthest reach of my expectations.
NeMeSiS3
Profile Blog Joined February 2012
Canada2972 Posts
July 04 2012 07:55 GMT
#140
On July 04 2012 16:19 fAnTaCy wrote:
This...is a quality thread..I approve = D

FoTG fighting!
emc
Profile Joined September 2010
United States3088 Posts
July 04 2012 08:09 GMT
#141
On July 04 2012 13:10 Spray wrote:
I lost it at ingrown hairs. Get one of those toilets that spray water to clean your anus off.


it's called a bidet

didn't even know that was how it was spelled until I googled it, but I remembered the name of it because of an SNL skit and it was all they said
Juisson
Profile Joined August 2011
Finland52 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 08:15:16
July 04 2012 08:12 GMT
#142
hahahah

On July 04 2012 15:51 wurm wrote:
I can't believe this topic and the Higgs particle topic are at the top of the General Forum. lol


And I'm more interested in reading this thread.
Mvp | GuMiho | Leenock | HerO | TaeJa | Seed --- FXO | IM | Liquid fighting!
omnic
Profile Joined July 2010
United States188 Posts
July 04 2012 08:15 GMT
#143
this has to be the best thread on TL right now. as to the OPs question. you could consider trimming your body hair and gradually get shorter and shorter the closer you get to the problem area
Pandemona *
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
Charlie Sheens House51463 Posts
July 04 2012 08:16 GMT
#144
need like NSF ReadingWhilstEating spoiler on this ffs, im eating my breakfast ;; why did i continue to read ;;
ModeratorTeam Liquid Football Thread Guru! - Chelsea FC ♥
MidKnight
Profile Joined December 2008
Lithuania884 Posts
July 04 2012 08:17 GMT
#145
I.. I'm just gonna.. Uh..
Well, ok
architecture
Profile Blog Joined May 2008
United States643 Posts
July 04 2012 08:23 GMT
#146
PROTIP:

Stop using paper: use baby wipes.
This is a life-changing switch. Thank me later.
tpfkan
jdseemoreglass
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
United States3773 Posts
July 04 2012 08:32 GMT
#147
On July 04 2012 17:23 architecture wrote:
PROTIP:

Stop using paper: use baby wipes.
This is a life-changing switch. Thank me later.

Sounds expensive...

PROTIP:

You don't need paper! It's true!
Just wipe with your hand and wash it in the sink when you are done.
Thank me later.
"If you want this forum to be full of half-baked philosophy discussions between pompous faggots like yourself forever, stay the course captain vanilla" - FakeSteve[TPR], 2006
Mario1209
Profile Joined September 2010
United States1077 Posts
July 04 2012 08:35 GMT
#148
On July 04 2012 16:35 endy wrote:
I never take a shit if I can't take shower right after. So basically, no shit outside of home/hotel.

Show nested quote +
On July 04 2012 15:49 Mario1209 wrote:
you could try using baby wipes instead of toilet paper?


You can't flush baby wipes.

keep a garbage can next to your toilet then
Co-Manager of Soviet Gaming * http://twitter.com/#!/sGMarioo * http://www.facebook.com/SovietGamingfanpage * https://twitter.com/#!/SovietGaming
Infernal_dream
Profile Joined September 2011
United States2359 Posts
July 04 2012 08:36 GMT
#149
Seems troll. Very good troll though. 5/5. In 10 years when someone necroes this shit the future TL'ers will have a good laugh. "Wouldn't want to stick my tongue in it...." rofl. You plan on wiping inside your butthole too?
HazMat
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
United States17077 Posts
July 04 2012 08:36 GMT
#150
On July 04 2012 17:35 Mario1209 wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 04 2012 16:35 endy wrote:
I never take a shit if I can't take shower right after. So basically, no shit outside of home/hotel.

On July 04 2012 15:49 Mario1209 wrote:
you could try using baby wipes instead of toilet paper?


You can't flush baby wipes.

keep a garbage can next to your toilet then

Sounds disgusting.
www.youtube.com/user/ShakeDrizzle | League and SSBM content creator | Armada's Youtube Editor
julianto
Profile Joined December 2010
2292 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 08:38:51
July 04 2012 08:38 GMT
#151
I like to wash my ass in the shower right after shitting, so it smells like soap. This is why I avoid public toilets cuz there're no showers nearby to wash your ass with. The end.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
MichaelDonovan
Profile Joined June 2011
United States1453 Posts
July 04 2012 08:38 GMT
#152
On July 04 2012 17:32 jdseemoreglass wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 04 2012 17:23 architecture wrote:
PROTIP:

Stop using paper: use baby wipes.
This is a life-changing switch. Thank me later.

Sounds expensive...

PROTIP:

You don't need paper! It's true!
Just wipe with your hand and wash it in the sink when you are done.
Thank me later.


Or better yet just sit in the sink and let the water run for a while
Mario1209
Profile Joined September 2010
United States1077 Posts
July 04 2012 08:41 GMT
#153
On July 04 2012 17:36 HazMat wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 04 2012 17:35 Mario1209 wrote:
On July 04 2012 16:35 endy wrote:
I never take a shit if I can't take shower right after. So basically, no shit outside of home/hotel.

On July 04 2012 15:49 Mario1209 wrote:
you could try using baby wipes instead of toilet paper?


You can't flush baby wipes.

keep a garbage can next to your toilet then

Sounds disgusting.

how so?
Co-Manager of Soviet Gaming * http://twitter.com/#!/sGMarioo * http://www.facebook.com/SovietGamingfanpage * https://twitter.com/#!/SovietGaming
architecture
Profile Blog Joined May 2008
United States643 Posts
July 04 2012 08:42 GMT
#154
Baby wipes: http://www.walgreens.com/store/c/walgreens-premium-baby-wipes/ID=prod6013803-product

$2.50.
Flushable.
tpfkan
Vallros
Profile Joined February 2011
Denmark64 Posts
July 04 2012 08:42 GMT
#155
HAHAHAHA!! made my morning:D voted one wipe ofc.
Calm like a bomb
Svetz
Profile Joined April 2010
Australia311 Posts
July 04 2012 08:48 GMT
#156
On July 04 2012 17:42 architecture wrote:
Baby wipes: http://www.walgreens.com/store/c/walgreens-premium-baby-wipes/ID=prod6013803-product

$2.50.
Flushable.



100% satisfaction guaranteed with all Walgreens products or your money back.

Do not flush
When I grow up I want to be Harry Dresden ;(
foehammer
Profile Joined August 2009
United States80 Posts
July 04 2012 08:51 GMT
#157
This is either the greatest or the worst first post ever.

Bidet is awesome btw although it takes a little getting used to.
Azera
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
3800 Posts
July 04 2012 08:53 GMT
#158
Oh god. What.
Check out some great music made by TLers - http://bit.ly/QXYhdb , by intrigue. http://bit.ly/RTjpOR , by ohsea.toc.
Steelavocado
Profile Joined May 2010
United States2123 Posts
July 04 2012 08:54 GMT
#159
I am going to Europe on Monday, going to try the Bidet. I will keep you guys posted.
MIRACLE IS YOUR TI7 CHAMP
MichaelDonovan
Profile Joined June 2011
United States1453 Posts
July 04 2012 08:54 GMT
#160
On July 04 2012 17:51 foehammer wrote:
This is either the greatest or the worst first post ever.

Bidet is awesome btw although it takes a little getting used to.


I don't think I would trust it to clean my ass properly. I would still have to wipe at least once after its done to check its work. One of my worst fears is smelling like shit in public.
NeonFlare
Profile Blog Joined September 2008
Finland1307 Posts
July 04 2012 08:57 GMT
#161
What does being fit have to do with licking anyway?
Cokefreak
Profile Joined June 2011
Finland8095 Posts
July 04 2012 08:59 GMT
#162
This thread delivers.
XiGua
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
Sweden3085 Posts
July 04 2012 09:01 GMT
#163
I am getting a deja vu feeling from way back TL.

I would never lick my bumhole. ._.
ლ(ಠ益ಠლ) APM, Why u make me spam?
Vindicare605
Profile Blog Joined August 2011
United States16056 Posts
July 04 2012 09:05 GMT
#164
On July 04 2012 17:38 MichaelDonovan wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 04 2012 17:32 jdseemoreglass wrote:
On July 04 2012 17:23 architecture wrote:
PROTIP:

Stop using paper: use baby wipes.
This is a life-changing switch. Thank me later.

Sounds expensive...

PROTIP:

You don't need paper! It's true!
Just wipe with your hand and wash it in the sink when you are done.
Thank me later.


Or better yet just sit in the sink and let the water run for a while


lol!
aka: KTVindicare the Geeky Bartender
plasmidghost
Profile Blog Joined April 2011
Belgium16168 Posts
July 04 2012 09:07 GMT
#165
What the hell did I just read
Yugoslavia will always live on in my heart
Latham
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
9560 Posts
July 04 2012 09:10 GMT
#166
What is this... I don't even...
I live by 1 rule - the bunghole is a 1-way only street. Only things go out - you understand?
I wipe until it's clean I guess...?
For the curse of life is the curse of want. PC = https://be.pcpartpicker.com/list/4JknvV
Tobberoth
Profile Joined August 2010
Sweden6375 Posts
July 04 2012 09:14 GMT
#167
While the whole thing about licking just seems like a big joke, I have similar problems to the OP. It sucks to have a hairy butt, no doubt.
OrchidThief
Profile Joined April 2011
Denmark2298 Posts
July 04 2012 09:14 GMT
#168
I hate to be backseatmoderating, but this is junk. Stop making junk threads here, this isn't reddit or 4chan.
Doomwish
Profile Joined July 2011
438 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 09:16:46
July 04 2012 09:15 GMT
#169
I have a special ritual for making sure i get my ass nice and clean.

step 1. wipe with TP until nothing comes off ( a visual check is important here)
step 2. dampen TP and wipe until nothing comes off
step 3. alternate steps 1 and 2 until completely clean
step 4. bask in the complete glory of a fresh-feces free rectum

(also don't forget to flush after every 3 wipes or so because too much TP clogs the toilet)

wasteful , inefficient and effective. The way all things should be done.
Passion
Profile Joined December 2003
Netherlands1486 Posts
July 04 2012 09:17 GMT
#170
On July 04 2012 18:15 Doomwish wrote:
I have a special ritual for making sure i get my ass nice and clean.

step 1. wipe with TP until nothing comes off
step 2. dampen TP and wipe until nothing comes off
step 3. alternate steps 1 and 2 until completely clean
step 4. bask in the complete glory of a fresh-feces free rectum

(also don't forget to flush after every 3 wipes or so because too much TP clogs the toilet)

wasteful , inefficient and effective. The way all things should be done.


Don't forget to mention it's also quite harmful for your body!
Lowko
Profile Joined August 2010
Netherlands286 Posts
July 04 2012 09:19 GMT
#171
What did I just read. O.O
www.LowkoTV.com
Doomwish
Profile Joined July 2011
438 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 09:19:58
July 04 2012 09:19 GMT
#172
On July 04 2012 18:17 Passion wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 04 2012 18:15 Doomwish wrote:
I have a special ritual for making sure i get my ass nice and clean.

step 1. wipe with TP until nothing comes off
step 2. dampen TP and wipe until nothing comes off
step 3. alternate steps 1 and 2 until completely clean
step 4. bask in the complete glory of a fresh-feces free rectum

(also don't forget to flush after every 3 wipes or so because too much TP clogs the toilet)

wasteful , inefficient and effective. The way all things should be done.


Don't forget to mention it's also quite harmful for your body!


what toilet paper? what do you suggest.....Sand?
Probe1
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States17920 Posts
July 04 2012 09:21 GMT
#173
Wow..
I just..

lol shave your hairy ass.
우정호 KT_VIOLET 1988 - 2012 While we are postponing, life speeds by
Mentalizor
Profile Joined January 2011
Denmark1596 Posts
July 04 2012 09:40 GMT
#174
On July 04 2012 13:19 Steelavocado wrote:
Get a bidet. They are pretty common in Europe no?


No... at least in Scandinavia they're not. I've ever only seen one.

However, if this is an issue, I think it would be a good investment.
I think this is a really weird topic though. I reckon with all the hair and such most people wouldn't lick a mans ass anyway
(yಠ,ಠ)y - Y U NO ALL IN? - rtsAlaran: " I somehow sit inside the bus.Hot_Bit giving me a massage"
Naphal
Profile Joined December 2010
Germany2099 Posts
July 04 2012 09:43 GMT
#175
well even if thoroughly wiped, you should use soap now and then...
also ew licking.
Holgerius
Profile Blog Joined January 2009
Sweden16951 Posts
July 04 2012 09:57 GMT
#176
I am extremely thorough.
I believe in the almighty Grötslev! -- I am never serious and you should never believe a thing I say. Including the previous sentence.
r.Evo
Profile Joined August 2006
Germany14080 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 10:00:07
July 04 2012 09:59 GMT
#177
Coming straight from the Higgs thread, love the variance around.

Shave the parts which are close to the parts that matter. Done. Always clean npnp.


PS: This reminds me of a "take a dump while standing or sitting"-thread we had some years ago. Anyone remember what I mean?
"We don't make mistakes here, we call it happy little accidents." ~Bob Ross
marttorn
Profile Blog Joined May 2011
Norway5211 Posts
July 04 2012 10:01 GMT
#178
I...I...I... I don't know what to say here. I knew it was going to be good as soon as I saw the title, though.
memes are a dish best served dank
Warzilla
Profile Joined December 2010
Czech Republic311 Posts
July 04 2012 10:01 GMT
#179
Haha man when ive seen this thread and mainly the poll. I thought you were asking if you should wipe girls "shrine" then i started reading and found this extremely hilarious.. However im starting to have similiar problem (damnit :D) so i will keep reading and maybe somebody will post something usefull :D Btw OP you are a baller
"AFTER LOST GAME - I usually run around in circles yelling "WHY OH GOD WHY" in my room, pointing towards the sky. After 5 to 10min ,i get tired and go back to playing"
InfusedTT.DaZe
Profile Joined August 2010
Romania693 Posts
July 04 2012 10:02 GMT
#180
wow so thats why i had hair there
"Echoes of past events nudge the tiller on my present course, I await its reflection in the future"
StarBrift
Profile Joined January 2008
Sweden1761 Posts
July 04 2012 10:03 GMT
#181
This has to be a top contender for most vulgar thread ever concieved on TL.
r.Evo
Profile Joined August 2006
Germany14080 Posts
July 04 2012 10:04 GMT
#182
HA I FOUND THE THREAD THIS REMINDED ME OF:

Wiping: Sitting or Standing?
"We don't make mistakes here, we call it happy little accidents." ~Bob Ross
namste
Profile Joined October 2010
Finland2292 Posts
July 04 2012 10:04 GMT
#183
The whole western wiping butts thing is really weird if you think about it.

As an example: Imagine the following scenario..

You're walking down the street, and suddenly you fell face first into a pile of dog poop.

Do you then proceed into: a) wiping your face and consider it clean; OR b) washing your face for 40 minutes and still feeling like your face is dirty?
IM hwaitiing ~ IMMvp #1 | Bang Min Ah <3<3
Kwidowmaker
Profile Blog Joined October 2007
Canada978 Posts
July 04 2012 10:10 GMT
#184
Never stop posting OP
Kk.
Jonoman92
Profile Blog Joined September 2006
United States9103 Posts
July 04 2012 10:10 GMT
#185
Why did I have to open this thread...
SilSol
Profile Joined April 2012
Sweden2744 Posts
July 04 2012 10:13 GMT
#186
haha what the hell hahaha ;D well baby wipes works well OP if you want some tips.
http://fragbite.se/user/117868/silsol since 2006 http://www.reddit.com/u/silsol77
DarkPlasmaBall
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States44076 Posts
July 04 2012 10:16 GMT
#187
So basically, I'm of eastern European descent. For anybody who isn't, basically what that means is your leg hair is really nothing more than an extension of your pubes


I spit out my drink. Hilarious.

I hope this stays open. Looking back to the old days of legendary nonsense threads that get the occasional epic necro, we need the occasional new one from time to time.

To contribute to the topic (as should be done, obviously), I thoroughly wipe until the toilet paper doesn't change colors anymore.
"There is nothing more satisfying than looking at a crowd of people and helping them get what I love." ~Day[9] Daily #100
G4rrett
Profile Joined June 2011
England124 Posts
July 04 2012 10:18 GMT
#188
Only on Teamliquid. Fantastic LOL.
Artosis: 'How's the balance?' Nestea: 'Terran: if you play alot you can become great player, Protoss: if you play hard and become good it's unbeatable, Zerg: Sad'
iNfeRnaL *
Profile Blog Joined August 2005
Germany1908 Posts
July 04 2012 10:19 GMT
#189
On July 04 2012 19:04 r.Evo wrote:
HA I FOUND THE THREAD THIS REMINDED ME OF:

Wiping: Sitting or Standing?

hoi o/

this thread here is glorious hahaha
thoradycus
Profile Joined August 2010
Malaysia3262 Posts
July 04 2012 10:20 GMT
#190
Dont get why using paper seems to be normal among some people. If i had to, Ill probably use half the roll O.O

also lol cant say much about the OP
r.Evo
Profile Joined August 2006
Germany14080 Posts
July 04 2012 10:24 GMT
#191
On July 04 2012 19:19 iNfeRnaL wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 04 2012 19:04 r.Evo wrote:
HA I FOUND THE THREAD THIS REMINDED ME OF:

Wiping: Sitting or Standing?

hoi o/

this thread here is glorious hahaha


oh hai.

"Yeah we didn't speak for a while and met again in a thread discussing how to get your ass clean" =(

I'm kind of waiting for someone to blog about all the fecal/urine threads on TL. >_<
"We don't make mistakes here, we call it happy little accidents." ~Bob Ross
Looms
Profile Joined May 2010
United States4624 Posts
July 04 2012 10:26 GMT
#192
On July 04 2012 19:20 thoradycus wrote:
Dont get why using paper seems to be normal among some people. If i had to, Ill probably use half the roll O.O


because its specifically designed to remove the remaining excrement from your ass then break down in water. we arent talking about busting out a few sheets of 8.5x11 to get the job done :D
Ryndika
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
1489 Posts
July 04 2012 10:29 GMT
#193
Reminds me of madventures. If you fall to shit with you face on. Do you wipe or wash it? Buy bide, be careful of nature haha. :D I just wipe the shit out of the butthole. ^^
as useful as teasalt
Stratos
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Czech Republic6104 Posts
July 04 2012 10:29 GMT
#194
On July 04 2012 19:04 r.Evo wrote:
HA I FOUND THE THREAD THIS REMINDED ME OF:

Wiping: Sitting or Standing?

same here. these threads are the few that are of any worth in the general forums
En Taro Violet
Corvi
Profile Blog Joined July 2008
Germany1406 Posts
July 04 2012 10:37 GMT
#195
when reading the title i was expecting something involving vaginas.

oh well, i got some advice anyway:
you have to eat good, like wholemeal products. then your shit will come out like a bobsled and you barely have to wipe at all and still be ready to get licked.
Nausea
Profile Joined October 2010
Sweden807 Posts
July 04 2012 10:39 GMT
#196
On July 04 2012 18:59 r.Evo wrote:
Coming straight from the Higgs thread, love the variance around.

Shave the parts which are close to the parts that matter. Done. Always clean npnp.


PS: This reminds me of a "take a dump while standing or sitting"-thread we had some years ago. Anyone remember what I mean?


Particles and matter. This is now officially a thread on Dark Matter.
Set it ablaze!
Tuthur
Profile Joined July 2010
France985 Posts
July 04 2012 10:39 GMT
#197
What a great thread this is!
Kickboxer
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
Slovenia1308 Posts
July 04 2012 10:42 GMT
#198
Use your toothbrush andstop when you are comfortable washing your teeth.
Mowr
Profile Joined November 2010
Sweden791 Posts
July 04 2012 10:43 GMT
#199
Pff paper. Few things feel better than a soft jet of water caressing your anus after a good shit in the morning.
Kill one man and they'll call you a murderer. Kill an army of men and they'll call you a general. But kill all men and they'll call you a god.
Sephy90
Profile Blog Joined January 2010
United States1785 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 10:56:25
July 04 2012 10:52 GMT
#200
When I lived with my mom for about a year she had baby wipes in the restroom because she took care of kid so to my curiosity I used one and stopped using toilet paper hahahaha.

A friend brought up a nice talk about how there are tons of hand sanitizers and different soaps but we still use toilet paper to wipe our shit. If you had shit on your arm would you just wipe it off with toilet paper or actually clean it well?

I still use toilet paper and clean well but I miss baby wipes.

On July 04 2012 19:19 iNfeRnaL wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 04 2012 19:04 r.Evo wrote:
HA I FOUND THE THREAD THIS REMINDED ME OF:

Wiping: Sitting or Standing?

hoi o/

this thread here is glorious hahaha

OH HOW FUN!

All my life I've wiped standing but recently started sitting down which felt very weird because I was uncomfortable doing it~
"So I turned the lights off at night and practiced by myself"
Kuni
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Austria765 Posts
July 04 2012 11:06 GMT
#201
Where I come from, there is actually something called the "Glückswurzn" ... roughtly translated it would mean like "lucky root". Doesn't happen often, but I am sure you can train it to occur more often by using your butt-muscles better. What it is, it's basically when you take a dump and don't have to wipe your ass, because it's perfectly clean in the first place.
bonus vir semper tiro
Kull of Atlantis
Profile Joined June 2012
Turkey98 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 11:13:12
July 04 2012 11:09 GMT
#202
hahahahah :D
this thread reminds me of teamliquid.net pre-2009. "Certainly close-able but it's not necessary to do so"

In our country every toilet has water spray mechanism. It works great.

Also it happens to be that I am suffering a medical condition called "Alopecia Universalis" meaning I lost all hair in my body (1 year ago)

Meaning I am kinda lucky about this matter Anyway, good luck to you in your journey :D
King Kull must die!
Knap4life
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
Slovenia333 Posts
July 04 2012 11:09 GMT
#203
This is just disturbing...
nymfaw
Profile Joined November 2010
Norway430 Posts
July 04 2012 11:09 GMT
#204
I was eating
Everything will be ok in the end. if it's not ok, its not the end.
SpaceFighting
Profile Joined January 2010
New Zealand690 Posts
July 04 2012 11:10 GMT
#205
i like the way u think OP
kuz pro
SomniGiggles
Profile Joined May 2011
United Kingdom214 Posts
July 04 2012 11:17 GMT
#206
I think my eyes just melted..
Equity213
Profile Joined July 2011
Canada873 Posts
July 04 2012 11:19 GMT
#207
I feel your pain bro. One thing that helps is to just trim the hairs down there, use scissors and one of those buzzers with a guard on it. Not too short or you will itch like a mofo. And never shave or wax, shit will come back with a vengence.
Equity213
Profile Joined July 2011
Canada873 Posts
July 04 2012 11:20 GMT
#208
On July 04 2012 20:06 Kuni wrote:
Where I come from, there is actually something called the "Glückswurzn" ... roughtly translated it would mean like "lucky root". Doesn't happen often, but I am sure you can train it to occur more often by using your butt-muscles better. What it is, it's basically when you take a dump and don't have to wipe your ass, because it's perfectly clean in the first place.


hahaha I love how you actually have a word for that! Gluckswurzn! I love those!
MassacrisM
Profile Joined November 2010
United Kingdom149 Posts
July 04 2012 11:22 GMT
#209
Dafuq did i just read...
" One of the painful things about our time is that those who feel certainty are stupid, and those with any imagination and understanding are filled with doubt and indecision " - Bertrand Russell
Daimai
Profile Blog Joined July 2010
Sweden762 Posts
July 04 2012 11:29 GMT
#210
Well, before I opened this thread I thought this was about cunnilingus
*yay*

Then I open it and read the poll
*A bit wierd but whatever..*

Then I read the text about some guys asshole
*EEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWW*

wp wp
To pray is to accept defeat.
KainiT
Profile Joined July 2011
Austria392 Posts
July 04 2012 11:32 GMT
#211
On July 04 2012 20:06 Kuni wrote:
Where I come from, there is actually something called the "Glückswurzn" ... roughtly translated it would mean like "lucky root". Doesn't happen often, but I am sure you can train it to occur more often by using your butt-muscles better. What it is, it's basically when you take a dump and don't have to wipe your ass, because it's perfectly clean in the first place.


You sure you didn't just make that one up? I have never heard about that expression -.-
With great power comes great responsibility.
shucklesors
Profile Joined May 2010
Singapore1176 Posts
July 04 2012 11:34 GMT
#212
This topic reminds me of TL in 2006
snow2.0
Profile Joined September 2010
Germany2073 Posts
July 04 2012 11:35 GMT
#213
Nope KainiT, he didn't.
http://www.stupidedia.org/stupi/Scheiße

Errrr.

Not really sure i want to be in this thread.
I'd not lick any asshole, no matter how shiny.
NeonFox
Profile Joined January 2011
2373 Posts
July 04 2012 11:40 GMT
#214
On July 04 2012 20:35 snow2.0 wrote:
Nope KainiT, he didn't.
http://www.stupidedia.org/stupi/Scheiße

Errrr.

Not really sure i want to be in this thread.
I'd not lick any asshole, no matter how shiny.


I overheard two friends talking about that and they called it a "perfect". I wipe until the paper comes back clean but I've never have that cause ingrown hair and bleeding oO
Alay
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United States660 Posts
July 04 2012 11:47 GMT
#215
This thread made me lol hard.

Just take a shower afterwards, even just a quick rinse will do.
Copymizer
Profile Joined November 2010
Denmark2082 Posts
July 04 2012 11:48 GMT
#216
Put water on your wipe and wipe from up til down. feels alot more comfortable.
~~Yo man ! MBCGame HERO Fighting !! Holy check !
kafkaesque
Profile Blog Joined November 2011
Germany2006 Posts
July 04 2012 11:51 GMT
#217
Grossest thread ever...
| (• ◡•)|╯ ╰(❍ᴥ❍ʋ)
KapsyL
Profile Joined November 2011
Sweden704 Posts
July 04 2012 11:51 GMT
#218
Epic Thread.

On July 04 2012 13:19 Tiegrr wrote:
I read the poll and voted for the worst answer.


I did this too.
Jurg Jurg Jurg
Incze
Profile Blog Joined December 2011
Romania2058 Posts
July 04 2012 11:53 GMT
#219
I just want to have been in this thread, forever in the Liquid hall of fame.
Religion: Buckethead
HardCorey
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States709 Posts
July 04 2012 12:16 GMT
#220
This is the kind of quality discussion I come to see at TL.net. I just want to say thankyou
Don't Worry, Be Happy.
Psychobabas
Profile Blog Joined March 2006
2531 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 12:18:59
July 04 2012 12:18 GMT
#221
What OP needs is those Japanese toilets that spray water. Whoever has used those can never go back to toilet paper, myself included.

[image loading]
radscorpion9
Profile Blog Joined March 2011
Canada2252 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 12:21:00
July 04 2012 12:20 GMT
#222
Have to agree...this is a pretty disturbing topic. Look...if you can't buy one of those toilets that dispense water to clean yourself, maybe you should just take a quick shower rather than causing bleeding problems with your rubbing.

Edit: Damn that's a nice looking toilet!
Zorkmid
Profile Joined November 2008
4410 Posts
July 04 2012 12:20 GMT
#223
I saw this topic in the sidebar two or three times, deciding against clicking on it.

Now that I have, I must say this is the first ass-wiping poll I've ever seen.

One question comes to mind.

If you get your asshole licked so often, couldn't you just eliminate wiping altogether and save big big cash?
iNbluE
Profile Joined January 2011
Switzerland674 Posts
July 04 2012 12:20 GMT
#224
I love this thread, and I love OP
ლ(╹◡╹ლ)
s0ma
Profile Joined July 2011
6 Posts
July 04 2012 12:23 GMT
#225
I feel like this video is pertinent and gives a decent visual analogy:

ggrrg
Profile Blog Joined September 2009
Bulgaria2716 Posts
July 04 2012 12:23 GMT
#226
I can absolutely relate to your story. I'm also from Eastern European descent, also extremely hairy and I also feel the need to wipe until the toilet paper remains completely white. This result is me going through toilet paper incredibly fast and one a rare occasion making my ass bleed... At least I've been spared the ingrown hair.
I've found wet wipes to be really helpful.
Pooping jst before showering is another useful habit.
And due to this thread I believe that bidets might be the way to go.
StarStruck
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
25339 Posts
July 04 2012 12:25 GMT
#227
On July 04 2012 19:03 StarBrift wrote:
This has to be a top contender for most vulgar thread ever concieved on TL.


Not even close. There have been a lot of obscene or random gems.
Papulatus
Profile Joined July 2010
United States669 Posts
July 04 2012 12:25 GMT
#228
This is a troll thread.
4 Corners in a day.
Ahelvin
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
France1866 Posts
July 04 2012 12:26 GMT
#229
On July 04 2012 20:53 Incze wrote:
I just want to have been in this thread, forever in the Liquid hall of SHAME.

Fixed that for you...

On a related note, shower is your friend .
Join the Liquipedia Zerg Project ! PM me for more information :).
StarStruck
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
25339 Posts
July 04 2012 12:26 GMT
#230
The Pony Express does a decent job of highlighting some of them over the last few years. You would have to dig deep anything prior to '08 though.
NoSmurfHere
Profile Joined June 2012
New Zealand613 Posts
July 04 2012 12:35 GMT
#231
in my home country we use water and our left hand
The following statement is true. The previous statement is false.
RogerX
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
New Zealand3180 Posts
July 04 2012 12:37 GMT
#232
On July 04 2012 21:25 Papulatus wrote:
This is a troll thread.


Whatchu talking about...?

Anyway use leaves and twigs, they're incredibly effective for their price.
Stick it up. take it up. step aside and see the world
StarStruck
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
25339 Posts
July 04 2012 12:42 GMT
#233
On July 04 2012 21:37 RogerX wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 04 2012 21:25 Papulatus wrote:
This is a troll thread.


Whatchu talking about...?

Anyway use leaves and twigs, they're incredibly effective for their price.


Just make sure it isn't poison ivy.
Piste
Profile Blog Joined July 2006
6172 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 12:53:56
July 04 2012 12:51 GMT
#234
if you want to get rid of those lumps from your hairy ass and be super clean without wiping yourself till bleeding use this:

[image loading]
Kuni
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Austria765 Posts
July 04 2012 12:51 GMT
#235
On July 04 2012 20:35 snow2.0 wrote:
Nope KainiT, he didn't.
http://www.stupidedia.org/stupi/Scheiße

Errrr.

Not really sure i want to be in this thread.
I'd not lick any asshole, no matter how shiny.


lol wtf that link !!!
bonus vir semper tiro
sorrowptoss
Profile Blog Joined June 2011
Canada1431 Posts
July 04 2012 12:53 GMT
#236
It's been awhile since TL hasn't had this kind of thread
Grimmyman123
Profile Joined January 2011
Canada939 Posts
July 04 2012 12:57 GMT
#237
Troll thread.

But, the OP's never heard of baby whipes?
Win. That's all that matters. Win. Nobody likes to lose.
Groog
Profile Joined July 2010
127 Posts
July 04 2012 13:06 GMT
#238
Dude, do like the rest of us. Get some wet wipes.
Aterons_toss
Profile Joined February 2011
Romania1275 Posts
July 04 2012 13:11 GMT
#239
We need more of these, after 20 non stop hours of civ5 i am genuinely enjoying this thread.
A good strategy means leaving your opponent room to make mistakes
peacenl
Profile Blog Joined November 2009
550 Posts
July 04 2012 13:12 GMT
#240
I use desinfectant cloth after wiping, it also helps stop infections, although I never had that. Adjust your food pattern if you're feel like it takes a hard time to take a dump. Because there are quite a few foods out there (e.g., Linum flax), that makes you feel like you're shitting bricks, literally.
- One does not simply walk into a bar and start calling the shots.
- Failure doesn't mean you are a failure it just means you haven't succeeded yet.
Phlatline
Profile Blog Joined December 2007
Croatia176 Posts
July 04 2012 13:14 GMT
#241
Someone needs a Cosmo
BillClinton
Profile Joined November 2009
232 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 13:17:22
July 04 2012 13:15 GMT
#242
we should support hygiene threads like this.

to the op: use baby oil (sunflower oil) when u shave your butt hole, then u wont have any problems after

this is really recommended for people who have itching problems after going to the toilet

ask your proctologist
Before you judge sth, keep in mind that the less you know about sth, the more that what you think or pretend to know about it, it says about yourself and your environment.
Kittan
Profile Joined April 2012
Poland3999 Posts
July 04 2012 13:16 GMT
#243
I give this thread a 4.5 sigma out of 5.
http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=81288 <--- How I fell in love with a man, a team, a game and a website in a single day... | "There are no false gods, there is only the Emperor, and Choi Yun Sung is his prophet." -> Zona 40k
Dbars
Profile Joined July 2011
United States273 Posts
July 04 2012 13:17 GMT
#244
Comedy gold.
Ropid
Profile Joined March 2009
Germany3557 Posts
July 04 2012 13:19 GMT
#245
With the wet wipes, just make sure to not clog the toilet or the plumbing with them. Do not use a lot of wet wipes in one session, and make sure to buy the wet wipes that are for flushing in the toilet. If you think you have bad plumbing in your house, prepare a waste basket with a lid for the wet wipes, just like for tampons and sanitary napkins.
"My goal is to replace my soul with coffee and become immortal."
Stress
Profile Joined February 2011
United States980 Posts
July 04 2012 13:21 GMT
#246
Best thread ever!
"Touch my gosu hands." - Tastosis | | fOrGG // MC // Jaedong
BillClinton
Profile Joined November 2009
232 Posts
July 04 2012 13:25 GMT
#247
On July 04 2012 14:24 travis wrote:
what i learned from this is that OP seems to have an interest in licking buttholes


you cant imagine how many people like to do it
Before you judge sth, keep in mind that the less you know about sth, the more that what you think or pretend to know about it, it says about yourself and your environment.
RockIronrod
Profile Joined May 2011
Australia1369 Posts
July 04 2012 13:31 GMT
#248
Like, if I got shit on my arm, I'd wash it completely, water, soap, the works. Wiping it off with a tissue just doesn't seem enough. But why do we assume it's enough after we poop? Surely that's not enough.
I'm thinking about switching to wet wipes.
Geo.Rion
Profile Blog Joined October 2008
7377 Posts
July 04 2012 13:32 GMT
#249
What the actual.... I dont even.... How's a thread like this on TL, im shell-shocked
"Protoss is a joke" Liquid`Jinro Okt.1. 2011
Hassybaby
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
United Kingdom10823 Posts
July 04 2012 13:35 GMT
#250
On July 04 2012 22:32 Geo.Rion wrote:
What the actual.... I dont even.... How's a thread like this on TL, im shell-shocked


He'll be in this thread soon don't worry.

You gotta shave tht shit dude!
"These guys are mindfucking me into a sex coma" | "Mayonnaise is a must-have lubricant when performing necrophilia"
Existential
Profile Joined December 2010
Australia2107 Posts
July 04 2012 13:35 GMT
#251
This is just so disturbing...
Jaedong <3 | BW - The first game I ever loved
xTrim
Profile Joined April 2011
472 Posts
July 04 2012 13:37 GMT
#252
what, the, fuck, did, i, just, read?
Euronyme
Profile Joined August 2010
Sweden3804 Posts
July 04 2012 13:40 GMT
#253
On July 04 2012 20:06 Kuni wrote:
Where I come from, there is actually something called the "Glückswurzn" ... roughtly translated it would mean like "lucky root". Doesn't happen often, but I am sure you can train it to occur more often by using your butt-muscles better. What it is, it's basically when you take a dump and don't have to wipe your ass, because it's perfectly clean in the first place.


Yeah those are great. It's kind of weird you have a name for it though..

For anyone of you who feel sick after reading this thread, i highly recommend [url blocked].
As a fairly hairy person, I can only wish you good luck. I must ask you though: how are you even sure you're not clean enough to be licked? Usually it's kind of hard to tell. Do you have some kind of mirror contraption set up so that you can view your bum in great detail after wiping?
I bet i can maı̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̨̨̨̨̨̨ke you wipe your screen.
Fragile51
Profile Joined October 2011
Netherlands15767 Posts
July 04 2012 13:41 GMT
#254
10/10, great read
BillClinton
Profile Joined November 2009
232 Posts
July 04 2012 13:42 GMT
#255
some people seem to be very sensitive ;D
Before you judge sth, keep in mind that the less you know about sth, the more that what you think or pretend to know about it, it says about yourself and your environment.
Stitch
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
Hong Kong134 Posts
July 04 2012 14:02 GMT
#256
awkward.
Head Production Director of NDTV - No Dice Gaming - Twitter: @StitchHK
Guamshin
Profile Joined January 2011
Netherlands295 Posts
July 04 2012 14:04 GMT
#257
You guys have all been trolled, I mean, just look at his name and Posts count.

It sure worked though, have to admit it's pretty funny :D.
Weeeee
Firebolt145
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
Lalalaland34486 Posts
July 04 2012 14:05 GMT
#258
what the flying fuck ahahahaha
Moderator
Euronyme
Profile Joined August 2010
Sweden3804 Posts
July 04 2012 14:08 GMT
#259
On July 04 2012 23:04 Guamshin wrote:
You guys have all been trolled, I mean, just look at his name and Posts count.

It sure worked though, have to admit it's pretty funny :D.


How is that a troll? It's a legitimate concern.
I bet i can maı̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̨̨̨̨̨̨ke you wipe your screen.
RogerX
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
New Zealand3180 Posts
July 04 2012 14:14 GMT
#260
On July 04 2012 17:32 jdseemoreglass wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 04 2012 17:23 architecture wrote:
PROTIP:

Stop using paper: use baby wipes.
This is a life-changing switch. Thank me later.

Sounds expensive...

PROTIP:

You don't need paper! It's true!
Just wipe with your hand and wash it in the sink when you are done.
Thank me later.

Oh jesus christ..
Stick it up. take it up. step aside and see the world
Euronyme
Profile Joined August 2010
Sweden3804 Posts
July 04 2012 14:22 GMT
#261
On July 04 2012 23:14 RogerX wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 04 2012 17:32 jdseemoreglass wrote:
On July 04 2012 17:23 architecture wrote:
PROTIP:

Stop using paper: use baby wipes.
This is a life-changing switch. Thank me later.

Sounds expensive...

PROTIP:

You don't need paper! It's true!
Just wipe with your hand and wash it in the sink when you are done.
Thank me later.

Oh jesus christ..


Yeah man. That's why you shake hands with your right hand. Back in the good old times everyone wiped with the left hand and dipped it in a jar of water afterwards
I bet i can maı̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̨̨̨̨̨̨ke you wipe your screen.
SpaceFighting
Profile Joined January 2010
New Zealand690 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 14:29:10
July 04 2012 14:28 GMT
#262
can we have a butt licking barcraft please?? preferably somewhere that isn't going to be a long trip from New Zealand, as I don't want to take a shit on the way there, and savour it

edit: afterwards im keen on playing some sc2 if anyone else is keen. thanks.
kuz pro
RogerX
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
New Zealand3180 Posts
July 04 2012 14:32 GMT
#263
On July 04 2012 23:28 SpaceFighting wrote:
can we have a butt licking barcraft please?? preferably somewhere that isn't going to be a long trip from New Zealand, as I don't want to take a shit on the way there, and savour it

edit: afterwards im keen on playing some sc2 if anyone else is keen. thanks.

Theres the barcraft hosted by playtech. Meet you there after I use the toilet!
Stick it up. take it up. step aside and see the world
Euronyme
Profile Joined August 2010
Sweden3804 Posts
July 04 2012 14:38 GMT
#264
On July 04 2012 23:28 SpaceFighting wrote:
can we have a butt licking barcraft please?? preferably somewhere that isn't going to be a long trip from New Zealand, as I don't want to take a shit on the way there, and savour it

edit: afterwards im keen on playing some sc2 if anyone else is keen. thanks.


A... butt licking barcraft?
I imagine some kind of human centipede that goes on in a big circle of people while starcraft is on a big screen TV.
I think your particular sexual orientation is too rare for a proper barcraft to consist of only of TeamLiquiders, but nevertheless I wish you the best of luck. You might have better luck posting in sex forums and find people there who are ok with playing starcraft afterwards though.
I bet i can maı̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̨̨̨̨̨̨ke you wipe your screen.
Kull of Atlantis
Profile Joined June 2012
Turkey98 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 14:50:55
July 04 2012 14:47 GMT
#265
This is what we use here
No, normally it's not that long, so you don't shit on it.

[image loading]
King Kull must die!
Zinnwaldite
Profile Joined August 2010
Norway1567 Posts
July 04 2012 14:48 GMT
#266
Get an extra long shower-cord,, use it to wash your ass after pooping,, works wonders for me.. Though i never poop away from home,, unless i REALLY have to..
We promise with a view to hope, but the reason to "accomplish" what we promised would be fear.
oemoR
Profile Joined June 2012
Canada29 Posts
July 04 2012 14:50 GMT
#267

Dude... L.o.l.

Such a funny community.
Follow the breadcrumbs.
amd098
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
Korea (North)1366 Posts
July 04 2012 14:56 GMT
#268
dear god, imagine if this thread crossed over with the sriracha thread...
North Korea is best Korea!
jarrydesque
Profile Joined November 2010
584 Posts
July 04 2012 15:08 GMT
#269
Thank you for this.

For everything.
#1 Kennigit fanboy/stalker
OpticalShot
Profile Blog Joined October 2009
Canada6330 Posts
July 04 2012 15:13 GMT
#270
Always shit at home, and just take a quick butt-shower after!
[TLMS] REBOOT
gape.ninja
Profile Joined April 2011
Japan249 Posts
July 04 2012 15:14 GMT
#271
speaking of body hairs do other people get random hairs like mid way up their shaft that's really annoying? idk what to do with that crap man
Turquoise
Profile Joined August 2011
Turkey145 Posts
July 04 2012 15:18 GMT
#272
How has this thread not been spotlighted?
Here's looking at you, kid.
EchoZ
Profile Blog Joined October 2010
Japan5041 Posts
July 04 2012 15:18 GMT
#273
Whats going on?
Dear Sixsmith...
davidohx
Profile Joined July 2010
United States114 Posts
July 04 2012 15:21 GMT
#274
HAPPY 4th of July to you too
"A dream is like a virus" -Leonardo Dicaprio (Inception)
Kull of Atlantis
Profile Joined June 2012
Turkey98 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 15:23:33
July 04 2012 15:22 GMT
#275
On July 05 2012 00:18 EchoZ wrote:
Whats going on?

We are debating on the Licks Boson. Welcome, join in...
King Kull must die!
CrtBalorda
Profile Joined December 2011
Slovenia704 Posts
July 04 2012 15:26 GMT
#276
idk the title
4th August 2012...Never forget.....
Lesrah
Profile Joined November 2010
Portugal110 Posts
July 04 2012 15:27 GMT
#277
I hate when i miss the wipe and im left with shit in my hand.. Ever hapened to anyone?
discomatt
Profile Joined March 2012
113 Posts
July 04 2012 15:32 GMT
#278
Wet-wipes.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wet_wipe

/thread
mierin
Profile Joined August 2010
United States4943 Posts
July 04 2012 15:34 GMT
#279
Oh my god I read this thread for the first time at work...nearly caused a disturbance. Epic!
JD, Stork, Calm, Hyuk Fighting!
InvXXVII
Profile Joined March 2011
Canada242 Posts
July 04 2012 15:38 GMT
#280
On July 04 2012 23:47 Kull of Atlantis wrote:
This is what we use here
No, normally it's not that long, so you don't shit on it.

[image loading]


I was going to say something similar lol. They have the same thing in Japan, except that the pipe is way way way more subtle lol. But seriously, if you ever get the chance, try them. Amazing. Can adjust jet power and temperature of the water. And the temperature of the toilet seat too.
A good loser is still a loser.
Deleted User 255289
Profile Joined March 2012
281 Posts
July 04 2012 15:39 GMT
#281
Wax your entire lower body or something.

Also, this should go in blogs right?
Zerg OP | CreansRNub | k-Poop | Zerg OP | Sea lions | \\m//
nennx
Profile Joined April 2010
United States310 Posts
July 04 2012 15:39 GMT
#282
why isn't this thread deleted or moved yet
Sup
Kevan
Profile Joined April 2011
Sweden2303 Posts
July 04 2012 15:39 GMT
#283
Yeah, I don't mind rimjobs either.
SC2, rip in pepperinos
Ayush_SCtoss
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
India3050 Posts
July 04 2012 15:40 GMT
#284
Just wash your ass with water.
Also I lol'd
End my suffering
SaYyId
Profile Joined August 2010
Portugal277 Posts
July 04 2012 15:45 GMT
#285
On July 04 2012 13:15 ecstatica wrote:
If youre truly eastern european you shouldnt worry about wiping

That was not funny.
No Strings. No attachments.
Ero-Sennin
Profile Blog Joined July 2009
United States756 Posts
July 04 2012 15:47 GMT
#286
You could use baby wipes

Or you could shave the area at least...
Luck makes talent look like genius.
IshinShishi
Profile Joined April 2012
Japan6156 Posts
July 04 2012 15:47 GMT
#287
I am not of eastern european decent, I am a little bit asian but mostly caucasian, I still have hairy as fuck bums, ffs.Been years since I used any form of paper, I just shower after pooping, works wonders.When I used to wipe, it just got my bum hairs disgustingly sticky with feces, why would I want that?
So... what that make you? Good? You're not good. You just know how to hide, how to lie
bonifaceviii
Profile Joined May 2010
Canada2890 Posts
July 04 2012 16:21 GMT
#288
Best thread on TL at the moment is a butthair thread.
Stay a while and listen || http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=354018
MentalGNT
Profile Joined January 2011
Denmark1264 Posts
July 04 2012 16:27 GMT
#289
This thread is amazing. Butthair is a great topic.

OT: I'm pretty damn thorough. Not to the point where I start bleeding though.
What a player
AnachronisticAnarchy
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
United States2957 Posts
July 04 2012 16:32 GMT
#290
One would think this thread would be closed by now. Not that I'm complaining, lol
"How are you?" "I am fine, because it is not normal to scream in pain."
ShaLLoW[baY]
Profile Blog Joined January 2007
Canada12499 Posts
July 04 2012 16:33 GMT
#291
anyone have an over/under on the final "how is this thread not closed yet" useless post count?
ALEXISONFIRE ARE FUCKING BACK (sAviOr for life)
Incze
Profile Blog Joined December 2011
Romania2058 Posts
July 04 2012 16:37 GMT
#292
I don't think it'll last much longer. Maybe they're just waiting to see what happens/for it to die down.
Religion: Buckethead
Romano
Profile Joined June 2010
Germany60 Posts
July 04 2012 16:39 GMT
#293
I have a lot of hair around there too. Like, rly a lot of hair. I always jump into the bathtub after I'm done, unscrew the shower head and splash my anus clean. I dont even use toiletpaper anymore. It's the best method imo. My anus is always clean and all the perverted girls out there want to rimjob it.
PS: I rly hope some of the poll answers arent for real... this is rly disturbing
FFGenerations
Profile Blog Joined April 2011
7088 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 16:50:00
July 04 2012 16:43 GMT
#294
i am a care assistant so i have some superior experience with this issue , since i wipe around 30 asses per day for the last 5 years (sadly).

unless you shower every time you shit, it is very likely that you usually have shit smeared over your behind to some degree.

this is true for females as much as for males.

if you think you are "wiping till you're clean" it is very likely that you're not and there is some degree of shit smeared over you.

i say this because unless you use wet wipes or some amount of water (or a flannel) it is practically impossible to not smear in some fashion.

there are rare people and/or occaisions, i'd say maybe 1 in 20, who seem to have perfectly clean asses due to the way the shit is somehow released. this might be because these people only shit a certain texture of shit due to poor but consistent diet, or a certain design of their ass size, though i haven't paid enough attention to figure it out. sometimes it just "comes right out" and thats the end of the matter. i am always surprised and somewhat delighted when this occurs, and make sure they know about it as i feel it is something of celebration.

btw "having hair" doesn't make the situation any worse, unless you are exceptionally hairy. infact i think that a smooth/feminine ass is actually worse for the situation, i know this because i removed all of the hair from my ass one time. average hair is fine.
Cool BW Music Vid - youtube.com/watch?v=W54nlqJ-Nx8 ~~~~~ ᕤ OYSTERS ᕤ CLAMS ᕤ AND ᕤ CUCKOLDS ᕤ ~~~~~~ ༼ ᕤ◕◡◕ ༽ᕤ PUNCH HIM ༼ ᕤ◕◡◕ ༽ᕤ
Mackin
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
Ireland181 Posts
July 04 2012 16:45 GMT
#295
This isn't the poll you're looking for....

Absolutely hilarious post.
Serenity
Zrana
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
United Kingdom698 Posts
July 04 2012 16:45 GMT
#296
On July 05 2012 01:43 FFGenerations wrote:
i am a care assistant so i have some superior experience with this issue , since i wipe around 30 asses per day for the last 5 years (sadly).

unless you shower every time you shit, it is very likely that you usually have shit smeared over your behind to some degree.

this is true for females as much as for males.

if you think you are "wiping till you're clean" it is very likely that you're not and there is some degree of shit smeared over you.

there are rare people and/or occaisions, i'd say maybe 1 in 20, who seem to have perfectly clean asses due to the way the shit is somehow released. this might be because these people only shit a certain texture of shit due to poor but consistent diet, or a certain design of their ass size, though i haven't paid enough attention to figure it out. i am always surprised and somewhat delighted when this occurs, and make sure they know about it as i feel it is something of celebration.

btw "having hair" doesn't make the situation any worse, unless you are exceptionally hairy. infact i think that a smooth/feminine ass is actually worse for the situation, i know this because i removed all of the hair from my ass one time. average hair is fine.


I challenge anyone to read this post and not immediately wonder if they've accidently taken some drugs.
Kull of Atlantis
Profile Joined June 2012
Turkey98 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-07-04 16:48:31
July 04 2012 16:47 GMT
#297
On July 05 2012 01:43 FFGenerations wrote:
there are rare people and/or occaisions, i'd say maybe 1 in 20, who seem to have perfectly clean asses due to the way the shit is somehow released. this might be because these people only shit a certain texture of shit due to poor but consistent diet, or a certain design of their ass size, though i haven't paid enough attention to figure it out. i am always surprised and somewhat delighted when this occurs, and make sure they know about it as i feel it is something of celebration.

this part made my day

it's a hard job you are doing btw, you must be another level on being human and patience. huge props
King Kull must die!
lannisport
Profile Joined February 2012
878 Posts
July 04 2012 16:49 GMT
#298
I'll tell you a secret, lots of asians and certain middleeasterns like to wash their asses after wiping thoroughly. They squirt soap in one hand and use a cup like holder to pour with the other. It;s the third world's answer to bidets.
amazingxkcd
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
GRAND OLD AMERICA16375 Posts
July 04 2012 16:51 GMT
#299
I dont even... what? 0,o?
The world is burning and you rather be on this terrible website discussing video games and your shallow feelings
The KY
Profile Blog Joined October 2010
United Kingdom6252 Posts
July 04 2012 16:52 GMT
#300
I've seen this thread on the sidebar a couple of times now and never clicked on it, fearing it's contents.

It has exceeded expectations.

For the record, who could even stand to go around without a perfectly clean anus? That is not a sentence I ever thought I would type.
Synwave
Profile Joined July 2009
United States2803 Posts
July 04 2012 16:55 GMT
#301
beard trimmer with that attachment that allows a certain length of hair to be left. Set it high, go over area, set it over, go over area again. Now you have very short easily cleanable ass without the hassle of shaving smooth/ingrown hairs/waxing.

Problem solved and moving on. This thread equals O_O
♞Nerdrage is the cause of global warming♞
Romano
Profile Joined June 2010
Germany60 Posts
July 04 2012 16:56 GMT
#302
On July 05 2012 01:52 The KY wrote:
I've seen this thread on the sidebar a couple of times now and never clicked on it, fearing it's contents.

It has exceeded expectations.

For the record, who could even stand to go around without a perfectly clean anus? That is not a sentence I ever thought I would type.


yes; 100% agree.
Zinnwaldite
Profile Joined August 2010
Norway1567 Posts
July 04 2012 16:56 GMT
#303
On July 05 2012 01:43 FFGenerations wrote:
there are rare people and/or occaisions, i'd say maybe 1 in 20, who seem to have perfectly clean asses due to the way the shit is somehow released. this might be because these people only shit a certain texture of shit due to poor but consistent diet, or a certain design of their ass size, though i haven't paid enough attention to figure it out. sometimes it just "comes right out" and thats the end of the matter. i am always surprised and somewhat delighted when this occurs, and make sure they know about it as i feel it is something of celebration.

btw "having hair" doesn't make the situation any worse, unless you are exceptionally hairy. infact i think that a smooth/feminine ass is actually worse for the situation, i know this because i removed all of the hair from my ass one time. average hair is fine.


I have a fair bit of hair,, but 2 out of 5 times when i poop i don't need to wipe at all,, i'm half blessed indeed..
We promise with a view to hope, but the reason to "accomplish" what we promised would be fear.
Fulla
Profile Joined January 2011
United Kingdom519 Posts
July 04 2012 17:04 GMT
#304
Use the shower, easy
New Hearthstone Cards ----> www.youtube.com/FullasGames
Mzimzim
Profile Joined June 2011
United States221 Posts
July 04 2012 17:05 GMT
#305
charmin ultra dude. less is more
IshinShishi
Profile Joined April 2012
Japan6156 Posts
July 04 2012 17:06 GMT
#306
There's a course you can take in Brazil to learn how to deal with that, it's called "Apreciando o buraco" which roughly translates to 'Enjoying the crack', you basically learn series of techniques to become one with it, don't rush the act, it's all about the feel, you will never need to wipe again, it takes time, but eventually it will always be as clean as a whistle.
So... what that make you? Good? You're not good. You just know how to hide, how to lie
julianto
Profile Joined December 2010
2292 Posts
July 04 2012 17:06 GMT
#307
On July 04 2012 23:22 Euronyme wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 04 2012 23:14 RogerX wrote:
On July 04 2012 17:32 jdseemoreglass wrote:
On July 04 2012 17:23 architecture wrote:
PROTIP:

Stop using paper: use baby wipes.
This is a life-changing switch. Thank me later.

Sounds expensive...

PROTIP:

You don't need paper! It's true!
Just wipe with your hand and wash it in the sink when you are done.
Thank me later.

Oh jesus christ..


Yeah man. That's why you shake hands with your right hand. Back in the good old times everyone wiped with the left hand and dipped it in a jar of water afterwards

LOL These are the posts that get me excited with disgust.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
bonifaceviii
Profile Joined May 2010
Canada2890 Posts
July 04 2012 17:09 GMT
#308
On July 05 2012 02:06 IshinShishi wrote:
There's a course you can take in Brazil to learn how to deal with that, it's called "Apreciando o buraco" which roughly translates to 'Enjoying the crack', you basically learn series of techniques to become one with it, don't rush the act, it's all about the feel, you will never need to wipe again, it takes time, but eventually it will always be as clean as a whistle.

Can you take it by correspondence?
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andynewin
Profile Joined March 2010
United States105 Posts
July 04 2012 17:32 GMT
#309
I shave its totally worth it BTW unless you Miss and cut yourself. I f you sit in the proper way you can minimize how much you need to wipe. BTW I was wondering do overweight people need to wipe more?
[url=http://sc2sig.com/profile/us/1731636/1/chairmallet/][img]http://sc2sig.com/s/us/1731636-1.png[/img][/url]
Sofestafont
Profile Joined May 2011
United States83 Posts
July 04 2012 17:41 GMT
#310
I've started wiping sitting down and feel that is a big improvement in the amount of wipes it takes. Charmin also has wet toilet paper and it is scented. When I feel like splurging I'll get those and get a new book for my Kindle and prepare for a relaxing evening. Back on the hair situation. I am very hairy and many the time my hairs on my butt cheeks tangle together making it annoying to pull my cheeks apart. So I figured I'd shave my butt. Worst idea ever. It looked fine (according to my girlfriend at the time) that just my butt was shaven and not my legs, but than came the razor burn and ingrown hairs. It was hell to sit down on anything for maybe a month. So if you are going for hair removal--avoid the razor.
bonifaceviii
Profile Joined May 2010
Canada2890 Posts
July 04 2012 17:42 GMT
#311
On July 05 2012 02:32 andynewin wrote:
BTW I was wondering do overweight people need to wipe more?

I'm guessing no, since they would have to spread their cheeks apart before they sit on the toilet...
Stay a while and listen || http://www.teamliquid.net/forum/viewmessage.php?topic_id=354018
InoyouS2
Profile Joined December 2011
1005 Posts
July 04 2012 17:44 GMT
#312
This is the weirdest thread I've seen on TL so far I think...
IMMvp|fOrGG|IMNesTea|oGsMC|Liquid`Hero|DongRaeGu|Slayers_MMA|Liquid`TLO|MarineKingPrime|IMSeed
Capped
Profile Blog Joined June 2011
United Kingdom7236 Posts
July 04 2012 17:48 GMT
#313
On July 05 2012 02:42 bonifaceviii wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 05 2012 02:32 andynewin wrote:
BTW I was wondering do overweight people need to wipe more?

I'm guessing no, since they would have to spread their cheeks apart before they sit on the toilet...


*sigh* after gaining alot of weight in the last year, i can assure you, we (overweight people Q.Q) need to wipe more. Even with spreaded cheeks. And im not even huge :-<
Useless wet fish.
FeUerFlieGe
Profile Joined April 2011
United States1193 Posts
July 04 2012 18:35 GMT
#314
you know it's July 4th when...
To unpathed waters, undreamed shores. - Shakespeare
NeMeSiS3
Profile Blog Joined February 2012
Canada2972 Posts
July 04 2012 18:39 GMT
#315
Can't beleive this was allowed to stay open : D I mean its hilarious, but it's obvious the poster was flaming : D he has 2 posts, this being one of them. Nonetheless, I got a quality laugh.
FoTG fighting!
sCCrooked
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
Korea (South)1306 Posts
July 04 2012 18:44 GMT
#316
*We interrupt this internet connection for one moment*

Omfg there's over 16 pages on discussion of anus cleanliness. Carry on.

*Reality check complete. Please resume your regularly-scheduled internetz.*
Enlightened in an age of anti-intellectualism and quotidian repetitiveness of asinine assumptive thinking. Best lycan guide evar --> "Fixing solo queue all pick one game at a time." ~KwarK-
MajorityofOne
Profile Joined December 2010
Canada2506 Posts
July 04 2012 18:46 GMT
#317
I'm learning so much I never wanted to know
WilDMousE
Profile Joined July 2011
Chile1335 Posts
July 04 2012 18:47 GMT
#318
I was eating spagetti, now im hating this thread and my curiosity.
Barackopala
Wrath 2.1
Profile Joined March 2011
Germany880 Posts
July 04 2012 18:47 GMT
#319
on a serious note.

1) get nacked
2) dump
3) shower*
4) ???
5) profit (feel good.)

*as you probably already showered that day just wash your body and not the hair again.

The tigers of wrath are wiser than the horses of instruction.
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