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On July 15 2011 04:54 Riku wrote:
I think you completely misunderstood. I said I had no issues in WoW other than a few small incidents. In fact, I tried to focus on how I wasn't given any priority when it came to video games.
:/
I'm starting to wonder if I'm a really bad writer and can't get my point across or if people aren't really reading my posts.
Could you clearly state what your point is?
What reactions do you expect to get from posting this?
edit: Jingle hit the nail on the head. Life isn't all sunshine and rainbows, you have to be prepared for the lovers and the haters.
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I think the first blog of yours that i read was "damn clothes..." I don't know how you can consider that not brining attention to your gender. It was so random and pointless and you talked about walking around naked an how uncomfortable panties were...
I guess that was when I decided you were an attention whore who absolutely loves being know as a girl.
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On July 15 2011 04:00 Riku wrote:I can take the heat, but I can't stand people being absolute asshats and idiots.
Unfortunately, as Jibba wisely put it, you have to get used to it. People are raised with certain preconceptions and prejudices that they don't care or don't have the perspective to challenge. They see three pieces of evidence (or 10 or 20, the number does not matter) and make a definitive conclusion about the state of something. Most women are X. Most Jewish people are Y. Most Republicans are Z. Most Turkish people are Q. Most white people are W. Most people who play World of Warcraft are V.
They don't even understand why making a conclusion is wrong if you press them on it (this thread has many examples). It's VERY easy to make conclusions and to put people into categories. Close-minded people need categories and labels to sort people into folders like a filing system. It's hard to keep an open mind and judge every single person completely on their own merits and try as hard as possible (everyone slips on this sometimes) not to let your own bias invade your assessment.
You can take solace in the fact that these people lack perspective and as long as you challenge your own beliefs (for if you don't, you'll be no better than they are - just from the opposite perspective), you will be better than they are.
On July 15 2011 05:30 Dance. wrote:
I think the first blog of yours was "damn clothes..." I don't know how you can consider that not brining attention to your gender. It was so random and pointless and you talked about walking around naked an how uncomfortable panties were...
I guess that was when I decided you were an attention whore who absolutely loves being know as a girl.
Panties are pretty damn uncomfortable.
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On July 15 2011 05:25 JingleHell wrote:Show nested quote +On July 15 2011 04:51 tofucake wrote:On July 15 2011 04:47 Riku wrote:On July 15 2011 04:19 tofucake wrote:On July 15 2011 04:14 TheGiz wrote:I have a lot of respect for Riku for not taking advantage of her gender and also for sharing her experiences. What? This entire blog is taking advantage of her gender. What? "Taking advantage"? I wanted to rant about it and I figured it would be a subject that TL would like to discuss (which seems to be true). How was I taking advantage of anything? If I posted this blog from a gender neutral tone, I would hope I would have the same debates (the ones not focused on me being a female). However, it is a pain in the ass to write without bias on a subject you are bias about and I hate writing in third person when I have personal experiences that help me show my point, because then I can't use them. On July 15 2011 04:22 JingleHell wrote:
See, I think the issue here is that you're trying to get the best of both worlds. You want the benefits of being a known female gamer without the drawbacks.
You like attention. We all do. That's been done to death here. Nothing wrong with liking attention. But if you take advantage of your minority status (attractive female in a sea of males is definitely taking advantage of being in the minority), there WILL be people who dislike it. It isn't equal footing any more when you do that.
Do I think it's absolutely moronic that benefits or drawbacks exist? Absolutely. There should be no benefit or drawback. The fact is, it does happen. Since it does, and since people are really slow about changing in ways that would make them more reasonable, you are in a position where you have to pick.
If you want the benefits of being a known female in a majority single male group, you have to have thick skin. If you put yourself in the spotlight, at the forefront, to get that attention you like (like everyone else does), you have to be able to take what's going to come your way.
I'm a male. No, I don't have to hide that. But I also don't have to say it. Here's a better example. I'm an ex-soldier. I was in the US Army. That makes a lot of people hate me without any actual reason. You know what though? They can say what they want, I'll say something back, I'll laugh about it, they might piss me off, but I'll get under their skin too. But I didn't have to tell them. It's not hiding it at all. It's leaving the irrelevant baggage at the door.
My time in the Army has NOTHING to do with SC2. Your gender has NOTHING to do with SC2. If you bring it into things to get attention, you should be ready for the consequences. In other words, if you go about being an active part of the community without referencing being a female, you'll be on equal footing for getting attention.
You throw the female thing out there, it isn't equal footing anymore, but some of the attention just got negative. That's life, even if it is stupid. I don't really care for the benefits. Certainly, it's nice knowing a number of people follow my blog, but I like to think they follow my blog because of what and how I write, not because I'm a woman. As for you having been in the military, that isn't a huge trait about you. Being a female is something that effects every single waking moment of my life. I see things differently (literally), I think about things different, and I certainly have a very different perspective! Someone mentioned that I referred to myself as being feminine in my Minecraft blog post. I don't recall doing that, I certainly wasn't trying to, but I guess it just happened. Considering we use gendered terms very commonly, any blog mention my past would be fully of singular "they's" and "significant others," which would probably bring about just as much trolling. Also, if you would note, many people in my gender neutral blogs have referred to me as a "he" and I never, ever, ever correct them. I perfectly understand your point, but I think you're wrong when it comes to applying it to gender. Speaking of which, I was in the US Army, too, and I haven't mentioned that in my blogs, have I? Undoubtedly, it would have the same "attention gaining" affects that mentioning I'm female does, but I have completed avoided it for the same reason you do. On July 15 2011 04:25 Backpack wrote:On July 15 2011 04:19 tofucake wrote:On July 15 2011 04:14 TheGiz wrote:I have a lot of respect for Riku for not taking advantage of her gender and also for sharing her experiences. What? This entire blog is taking advantage of her gender. Agreed. If you stop drawing attention to your gender, you will stop getting shit for it. I post negatively in some of your blogs and rate them low from time to time because I don't like them for various reasons, none of which is you being female. If you want to fit in, stop stereotyping yourself and accept the fact that there may be other reasons why people don't like you. Wat. Just because I posted... this blog? No, seriously, this is the ONLY blog I have that focuses on my gender. Certainly, I have mentioned my gender in other blogs, but by no means has it been the main topic. A man can casually mention his gender without a second thought, so why should I have people jump on my ass when I happen to mention I'm female while discussing a completely different topic? First, yes: taking advantage. If you weren't a girl, this blog wouldn't exist and neither would the discussion. But you are a girl, and you've made this blog, and now discussion happens. It's been surprisingly civil so far, and I've enjoyed it, but the fact is that the mere fact that you are a girl and this blog is about that fact means you are taking advantage of your gender. Second, Jingle was more talking about the phenomenon of being one thing, then stating a fact about yourself, and instantly having people view you differently ("OMG YOU KILL PEOPLE YOU'RE AN EVIL BASTARD AND WE ARE GOING TO PROTEST YOUR FUNERAL WHEN YOU DIE SCUM" etc) for no other reason than X. Thanks, Tofu, that was in fact my point. It's about relevance. My military time isn't relevant in this community, but if I bring it up, I instantly get judged. Multiple judgements, and the majority of them aren't true. The difference, Riku, is that I hate BOTH polarized judgements. I'll bitch someone out for thanking me for what I did in Iraq. I hate that shit, and the ones thanking me think I was finding WMD's, and are convinced that since we found them (we didn't really) that taking down Hussein while we were there was a legitimate sort of move (not when we invade under a false premise). If someone goes the other extreme, I'll rip them a new one, or knock them out if they do it in person. Why? Because they're wrong, and if they want to call me a baby-killer, they better be ready to find out what happens when you antagonize someone you think is that hostile. The point is, you're perfectly content getting white-knight reactions, and people who follow your blog religiously (Hint, they're doing it because you're a female gamer and they're a step away from e-stalker), but you expect not to get the other reaction. You can't have the best of both worlds. It's impossible. If you bring in an irrelevant and polarized detail about yourself, expect people on both sides to react to it. So tell off your defenders, handle the flak you get yourself, and maybe people will think more of you.
Great post. Can't have your cake and eat it too. And thank you for your service to our country, you big stud, you. 
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On July 15 2011 05:30 Dance. wrote:
I think the first blog of yours that i read was "damn clothes..." I don't know how you can consider that not brining attention to your gender. It was so random and pointless and you talked about walking around naked an how uncomfortable panties were...
I guess that was when I decided you were an attention whore who absolutely loves being know as a girl.
Yeah, that was the first Riku blog I read too. Kind of causes a reaction. While I don't particularly have a problem with the notion of wanting attention, I do have a problem with people acting like they're shocked when they get the natural range of reactions to what they say or do.
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On July 15 2011 05:30 dcemuser wrote:Show nested quote +On July 15 2011 05:30 Dance. wrote:
I think the first blog of yours was "damn clothes..." I don't know how you can consider that not brining attention to your gender. It was so random and pointless and you talked about walking around naked an how uncomfortable panties were...
I guess that was when I decided you were an attention whore who absolutely loves being know as a girl. Panties are pretty damn uncomfortable.
Lol. You should make a blog and tell me about it.
Above poster makes a good point
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i dont see how any of this is her taking advantage. She posted a personally story about being a minority in the gaming scene, with a little bit of history of her life as well.
People post life stories and opinions all the time in these blogs, big deal.
is she taking advantage of her being a girl for attention here? no, she posted a blog expressing opinions and thoughts, like so many other people do.
the fact is, Riku, is that people are assholes.
Get used to it
.
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On July 15 2011 05:25 JingleHell wrote:Show nested quote +On July 15 2011 04:51 tofucake wrote:On July 15 2011 04:47 Riku wrote:On July 15 2011 04:19 tofucake wrote:On July 15 2011 04:14 TheGiz wrote:I have a lot of respect for Riku for not taking advantage of her gender and also for sharing her experiences. What? This entire blog is taking advantage of her gender. What? "Taking advantage"? I wanted to rant about it and I figured it would be a subject that TL would like to discuss (which seems to be true). How was I taking advantage of anything? If I posted this blog from a gender neutral tone, I would hope I would have the same debates (the ones not focused on me being a female). However, it is a pain in the ass to write without bias on a subject you are bias about and I hate writing in third person when I have personal experiences that help me show my point, because then I can't use them. On July 15 2011 04:22 JingleHell wrote:
See, I think the issue here is that you're trying to get the best of both worlds. You want the benefits of being a known female gamer without the drawbacks.
You like attention. We all do. That's been done to death here. Nothing wrong with liking attention. But if you take advantage of your minority status (attractive female in a sea of males is definitely taking advantage of being in the minority), there WILL be people who dislike it. It isn't equal footing any more when you do that.
Do I think it's absolutely moronic that benefits or drawbacks exist? Absolutely. There should be no benefit or drawback. The fact is, it does happen. Since it does, and since people are really slow about changing in ways that would make them more reasonable, you are in a position where you have to pick.
If you want the benefits of being a known female in a majority single male group, you have to have thick skin. If you put yourself in the spotlight, at the forefront, to get that attention you like (like everyone else does), you have to be able to take what's going to come your way.
I'm a male. No, I don't have to hide that. But I also don't have to say it. Here's a better example. I'm an ex-soldier. I was in the US Army. That makes a lot of people hate me without any actual reason. You know what though? They can say what they want, I'll say something back, I'll laugh about it, they might piss me off, but I'll get under their skin too. But I didn't have to tell them. It's not hiding it at all. It's leaving the irrelevant baggage at the door.
My time in the Army has NOTHING to do with SC2. Your gender has NOTHING to do with SC2. If you bring it into things to get attention, you should be ready for the consequences. In other words, if you go about being an active part of the community without referencing being a female, you'll be on equal footing for getting attention.
You throw the female thing out there, it isn't equal footing anymore, but some of the attention just got negative. That's life, even if it is stupid. I don't really care for the benefits. Certainly, it's nice knowing a number of people follow my blog, but I like to think they follow my blog because of what and how I write, not because I'm a woman. As for you having been in the military, that isn't a huge trait about you. Being a female is something that effects every single waking moment of my life. I see things differently (literally), I think about things different, and I certainly have a very different perspective! Someone mentioned that I referred to myself as being feminine in my Minecraft blog post. I don't recall doing that, I certainly wasn't trying to, but I guess it just happened. Considering we use gendered terms very commonly, any blog mention my past would be fully of singular "they's" and "significant others," which would probably bring about just as much trolling. Also, if you would note, many people in my gender neutral blogs have referred to me as a "he" and I never, ever, ever correct them. I perfectly understand your point, but I think you're wrong when it comes to applying it to gender. Speaking of which, I was in the US Army, too, and I haven't mentioned that in my blogs, have I? Undoubtedly, it would have the same "attention gaining" affects that mentioning I'm female does, but I have completed avoided it for the same reason you do. On July 15 2011 04:25 Backpack wrote:On July 15 2011 04:19 tofucake wrote:On July 15 2011 04:14 TheGiz wrote:I have a lot of respect for Riku for not taking advantage of her gender and also for sharing her experiences. What? This entire blog is taking advantage of her gender. Agreed. If you stop drawing attention to your gender, you will stop getting shit for it. I post negatively in some of your blogs and rate them low from time to time because I don't like them for various reasons, none of which is you being female. If you want to fit in, stop stereotyping yourself and accept the fact that there may be other reasons why people don't like you. Wat. Just because I posted... this blog? No, seriously, this is the ONLY blog I have that focuses on my gender. Certainly, I have mentioned my gender in other blogs, but by no means has it been the main topic. A man can casually mention his gender without a second thought, so why should I have people jump on my ass when I happen to mention I'm female while discussing a completely different topic? First, yes: taking advantage. If you weren't a girl, this blog wouldn't exist and neither would the discussion. But you are a girl, and you've made this blog, and now discussion happens. It's been surprisingly civil so far, and I've enjoyed it, but the fact is that the mere fact that you are a girl and this blog is about that fact means you are taking advantage of your gender. Second, Jingle was more talking about the phenomenon of being one thing, then stating a fact about yourself, and instantly having people view you differently ("OMG YOU KILL PEOPLE YOU'RE AN EVIL BASTARD AND WE ARE GOING TO PROTEST YOUR FUNERAL WHEN YOU DIE SCUM" etc) for no other reason than X. Thanks, Tofu, that was in fact my point. It's about relevance. My military time isn't relevant in this community, but if I bring it up, I instantly get judged. Multiple judgements, and the majority of them aren't true. The difference, Riku, is that I hate BOTH polarized judgements. I'll bitch someone out for thanking me for what I did in Iraq. I hate that shit, and the ones thanking me think I was finding WMD's, and are convinced that since we found them (we didn't really) that taking down Hussein while we were there was a legitimate sort of move (not when we invade under a false premise). If someone goes the other extreme, I'll rip them a new one, or knock them out if they do it in person. Why? Because they're wrong, and if they want to call me a baby-killer, they better be ready to find out what happens when you antagonize someone you think is that hostile. The point is, you're perfectly content getting white-knight reactions, and people who follow your blog religiously (Hint, they're doing it because you're a female gamer and they're a step away from e-stalker), but you expect not to get the other reaction. You can't have the best of both worlds. It's impossible. If you bring in an irrelevant and polarized detail about yourself, expect people on both sides to react to it. So tell off your defenders, handle the flak you get yourself, and maybe people will think more of you.
I assure you, people follow my blog for reasons other than I'm a female gamer and I find it highly insulting that you would even suggest that is the only reason people follow my blogs.
I don't like special treatment for being female. In fact, I was very happy I didn't get any in WoW. Of course, it's fun to laugh about the few weird incidences that happen, but I am by no means proud nor encouraging of them.
My blog is to write about my opinions and experiences. Just so happens I experience everything in the world as a woman, so I happen to mention that occassionally. I don't want to be treated better or worse for it. If you note, my "Guy Blog" isn't titled [Guy Blog], though that would undoubtedly have gotten me a lot more views and attention.
I'm not going to tell off my "defenders," though. I think it is extremely rude to bash on someone when they go out on a limb for you, especially when they might just be defending me because they believe in what I'm saying, not because I have breasts. That doesn't mean I plan to cheer them on when I believe they are defending me just because of my gender, though.
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Hyrule19221 Posts
On July 15 2011 05:35 TheAura wrote:
i dont see how any of this is her taking advantage. She posted a personally story about being a minority in the gaming scene, with a little bit of history of her life as well.
People post life stories and opinions all the time in these blogs, big deal.
is she taking advantage of her being a girl for attention here? no, she posted a blog expressing opinions and thoughts, like so many other people do.
the fact is, Riku, is that people are assholes.
Get used to it
.
More asians play video games than white people. That makes me a minority. You know what would happen if I made a blog about being white?
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On July 15 2011 05:35 Riku wrote:Show nested quote +On July 15 2011 05:25 JingleHell wrote:On July 15 2011 04:51 tofucake wrote:On July 15 2011 04:47 Riku wrote:On July 15 2011 04:19 tofucake wrote:On July 15 2011 04:14 TheGiz wrote:I have a lot of respect for Riku for not taking advantage of her gender and also for sharing her experiences. What? This entire blog is taking advantage of her gender. What? "Taking advantage"? I wanted to rant about it and I figured it would be a subject that TL would like to discuss (which seems to be true). How was I taking advantage of anything? If I posted this blog from a gender neutral tone, I would hope I would have the same debates (the ones not focused on me being a female). However, it is a pain in the ass to write without bias on a subject you are bias about and I hate writing in third person when I have personal experiences that help me show my point, because then I can't use them. On July 15 2011 04:22 JingleHell wrote:
See, I think the issue here is that you're trying to get the best of both worlds. You want the benefits of being a known female gamer without the drawbacks.
You like attention. We all do. That's been done to death here. Nothing wrong with liking attention. But if you take advantage of your minority status (attractive female in a sea of males is definitely taking advantage of being in the minority), there WILL be people who dislike it. It isn't equal footing any more when you do that.
Do I think it's absolutely moronic that benefits or drawbacks exist? Absolutely. There should be no benefit or drawback. The fact is, it does happen. Since it does, and since people are really slow about changing in ways that would make them more reasonable, you are in a position where you have to pick.
If you want the benefits of being a known female in a majority single male group, you have to have thick skin. If you put yourself in the spotlight, at the forefront, to get that attention you like (like everyone else does), you have to be able to take what's going to come your way.
I'm a male. No, I don't have to hide that. But I also don't have to say it. Here's a better example. I'm an ex-soldier. I was in the US Army. That makes a lot of people hate me without any actual reason. You know what though? They can say what they want, I'll say something back, I'll laugh about it, they might piss me off, but I'll get under their skin too. But I didn't have to tell them. It's not hiding it at all. It's leaving the irrelevant baggage at the door.
My time in the Army has NOTHING to do with SC2. Your gender has NOTHING to do with SC2. If you bring it into things to get attention, you should be ready for the consequences. In other words, if you go about being an active part of the community without referencing being a female, you'll be on equal footing for getting attention.
You throw the female thing out there, it isn't equal footing anymore, but some of the attention just got negative. That's life, even if it is stupid. I don't really care for the benefits. Certainly, it's nice knowing a number of people follow my blog, but I like to think they follow my blog because of what and how I write, not because I'm a woman. As for you having been in the military, that isn't a huge trait about you. Being a female is something that effects every single waking moment of my life. I see things differently (literally), I think about things different, and I certainly have a very different perspective! Someone mentioned that I referred to myself as being feminine in my Minecraft blog post. I don't recall doing that, I certainly wasn't trying to, but I guess it just happened. Considering we use gendered terms very commonly, any blog mention my past would be fully of singular "they's" and "significant others," which would probably bring about just as much trolling. Also, if you would note, many people in my gender neutral blogs have referred to me as a "he" and I never, ever, ever correct them. I perfectly understand your point, but I think you're wrong when it comes to applying it to gender. Speaking of which, I was in the US Army, too, and I haven't mentioned that in my blogs, have I? Undoubtedly, it would have the same "attention gaining" affects that mentioning I'm female does, but I have completed avoided it for the same reason you do. On July 15 2011 04:25 Backpack wrote:On July 15 2011 04:19 tofucake wrote:On July 15 2011 04:14 TheGiz wrote:I have a lot of respect for Riku for not taking advantage of her gender and also for sharing her experiences. What? This entire blog is taking advantage of her gender. Agreed. If you stop drawing attention to your gender, you will stop getting shit for it. I post negatively in some of your blogs and rate them low from time to time because I don't like them for various reasons, none of which is you being female. If you want to fit in, stop stereotyping yourself and accept the fact that there may be other reasons why people don't like you. Wat. Just because I posted... this blog? No, seriously, this is the ONLY blog I have that focuses on my gender. Certainly, I have mentioned my gender in other blogs, but by no means has it been the main topic. A man can casually mention his gender without a second thought, so why should I have people jump on my ass when I happen to mention I'm female while discussing a completely different topic? First, yes: taking advantage. If you weren't a girl, this blog wouldn't exist and neither would the discussion. But you are a girl, and you've made this blog, and now discussion happens. It's been surprisingly civil so far, and I've enjoyed it, but the fact is that the mere fact that you are a girl and this blog is about that fact means you are taking advantage of your gender. Second, Jingle was more talking about the phenomenon of being one thing, then stating a fact about yourself, and instantly having people view you differently ("OMG YOU KILL PEOPLE YOU'RE AN EVIL BASTARD AND WE ARE GOING TO PROTEST YOUR FUNERAL WHEN YOU DIE SCUM" etc) for no other reason than X. Thanks, Tofu, that was in fact my point. It's about relevance. My military time isn't relevant in this community, but if I bring it up, I instantly get judged. Multiple judgements, and the majority of them aren't true. The difference, Riku, is that I hate BOTH polarized judgements. I'll bitch someone out for thanking me for what I did in Iraq. I hate that shit, and the ones thanking me think I was finding WMD's, and are convinced that since we found them (we didn't really) that taking down Hussein while we were there was a legitimate sort of move (not when we invade under a false premise). If someone goes the other extreme, I'll rip them a new one, or knock them out if they do it in person. Why? Because they're wrong, and if they want to call me a baby-killer, they better be ready to find out what happens when you antagonize someone you think is that hostile. The point is, you're perfectly content getting white-knight reactions, and people who follow your blog religiously (Hint, they're doing it because you're a female gamer and they're a step away from e-stalker), but you expect not to get the other reaction. You can't have the best of both worlds. It's impossible. If you bring in an irrelevant and polarized detail about yourself, expect people on both sides to react to it. So tell off your defenders, handle the flak you get yourself, and maybe people will think more of you. I assure you, people follow my blog for reasons other than I'm a female gamer and I find it highly insulting that you would even suggest that is the only reason people follow my blogs. I don't like special treatment for being female. In fact, I was very happy I didn't get any in WoW. Of course, it's fun to laugh about the few weird incidences that happen, but I am by no means proud nor encouraging of them. My blog is to write about my opinions and experiences. Just so happens I experience everything in the world as a woman, so I happen to mention that occassionally. I don't want to be treated better or worse for it. If you note, my "Guy Blog" isn't titled [Guy Blog], though that would undoubtedly have gotten me a lot more views and attention. I'm not going to tell off my "defenders," though. I think it is extremely rude to bash on someone when they go out on a limb for you, especially when they might just be defending me because they believe in what I'm saying, not because I have breasts. That doesn't mean I plan to cheer them on when I believe they are defending me just because of my gender, though.
Clever of you to ignore the part of his post that makes sense and focus on the part where he says you are a girl...
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On July 15 2011 05:35 Riku wrote:Show nested quote +On July 15 2011 05:25 JingleHell wrote:On July 15 2011 04:51 tofucake wrote:On July 15 2011 04:47 Riku wrote:On July 15 2011 04:19 tofucake wrote:On July 15 2011 04:14 TheGiz wrote:I have a lot of respect for Riku for not taking advantage of her gender and also for sharing her experiences. What? This entire blog is taking advantage of her gender. What? "Taking advantage"? I wanted to rant about it and I figured it would be a subject that TL would like to discuss (which seems to be true). How was I taking advantage of anything? If I posted this blog from a gender neutral tone, I would hope I would have the same debates (the ones not focused on me being a female). However, it is a pain in the ass to write without bias on a subject you are bias about and I hate writing in third person when I have personal experiences that help me show my point, because then I can't use them. On July 15 2011 04:22 JingleHell wrote:
See, I think the issue here is that you're trying to get the best of both worlds. You want the benefits of being a known female gamer without the drawbacks.
You like attention. We all do. That's been done to death here. Nothing wrong with liking attention. But if you take advantage of your minority status (attractive female in a sea of males is definitely taking advantage of being in the minority), there WILL be people who dislike it. It isn't equal footing any more when you do that.
Do I think it's absolutely moronic that benefits or drawbacks exist? Absolutely. There should be no benefit or drawback. The fact is, it does happen. Since it does, and since people are really slow about changing in ways that would make them more reasonable, you are in a position where you have to pick.
If you want the benefits of being a known female in a majority single male group, you have to have thick skin. If you put yourself in the spotlight, at the forefront, to get that attention you like (like everyone else does), you have to be able to take what's going to come your way.
I'm a male. No, I don't have to hide that. But I also don't have to say it. Here's a better example. I'm an ex-soldier. I was in the US Army. That makes a lot of people hate me without any actual reason. You know what though? They can say what they want, I'll say something back, I'll laugh about it, they might piss me off, but I'll get under their skin too. But I didn't have to tell them. It's not hiding it at all. It's leaving the irrelevant baggage at the door.
My time in the Army has NOTHING to do with SC2. Your gender has NOTHING to do with SC2. If you bring it into things to get attention, you should be ready for the consequences. In other words, if you go about being an active part of the community without referencing being a female, you'll be on equal footing for getting attention.
You throw the female thing out there, it isn't equal footing anymore, but some of the attention just got negative. That's life, even if it is stupid. I don't really care for the benefits. Certainly, it's nice knowing a number of people follow my blog, but I like to think they follow my blog because of what and how I write, not because I'm a woman. As for you having been in the military, that isn't a huge trait about you. Being a female is something that effects every single waking moment of my life. I see things differently (literally), I think about things different, and I certainly have a very different perspective! Someone mentioned that I referred to myself as being feminine in my Minecraft blog post. I don't recall doing that, I certainly wasn't trying to, but I guess it just happened. Considering we use gendered terms very commonly, any blog mention my past would be fully of singular "they's" and "significant others," which would probably bring about just as much trolling. Also, if you would note, many people in my gender neutral blogs have referred to me as a "he" and I never, ever, ever correct them. I perfectly understand your point, but I think you're wrong when it comes to applying it to gender. Speaking of which, I was in the US Army, too, and I haven't mentioned that in my blogs, have I? Undoubtedly, it would have the same "attention gaining" affects that mentioning I'm female does, but I have completed avoided it for the same reason you do. On July 15 2011 04:25 Backpack wrote:On July 15 2011 04:19 tofucake wrote:On July 15 2011 04:14 TheGiz wrote:I have a lot of respect for Riku for not taking advantage of her gender and also for sharing her experiences. What? This entire blog is taking advantage of her gender. Agreed. If you stop drawing attention to your gender, you will stop getting shit for it. I post negatively in some of your blogs and rate them low from time to time because I don't like them for various reasons, none of which is you being female. If you want to fit in, stop stereotyping yourself and accept the fact that there may be other reasons why people don't like you. Wat. Just because I posted... this blog? No, seriously, this is the ONLY blog I have that focuses on my gender. Certainly, I have mentioned my gender in other blogs, but by no means has it been the main topic. A man can casually mention his gender without a second thought, so why should I have people jump on my ass when I happen to mention I'm female while discussing a completely different topic? First, yes: taking advantage. If you weren't a girl, this blog wouldn't exist and neither would the discussion. But you are a girl, and you've made this blog, and now discussion happens. It's been surprisingly civil so far, and I've enjoyed it, but the fact is that the mere fact that you are a girl and this blog is about that fact means you are taking advantage of your gender. Second, Jingle was more talking about the phenomenon of being one thing, then stating a fact about yourself, and instantly having people view you differently ("OMG YOU KILL PEOPLE YOU'RE AN EVIL BASTARD AND WE ARE GOING TO PROTEST YOUR FUNERAL WHEN YOU DIE SCUM" etc) for no other reason than X. Thanks, Tofu, that was in fact my point. It's about relevance. My military time isn't relevant in this community, but if I bring it up, I instantly get judged. Multiple judgements, and the majority of them aren't true. The difference, Riku, is that I hate BOTH polarized judgements. I'll bitch someone out for thanking me for what I did in Iraq. I hate that shit, and the ones thanking me think I was finding WMD's, and are convinced that since we found them (we didn't really) that taking down Hussein while we were there was a legitimate sort of move (not when we invade under a false premise). If someone goes the other extreme, I'll rip them a new one, or knock them out if they do it in person. Why? Because they're wrong, and if they want to call me a baby-killer, they better be ready to find out what happens when you antagonize someone you think is that hostile. The point is, you're perfectly content getting white-knight reactions, and people who follow your blog religiously (Hint, they're doing it because you're a female gamer and they're a step away from e-stalker), but you expect not to get the other reaction. You can't have the best of both worlds. It's impossible. If you bring in an irrelevant and polarized detail about yourself, expect people on both sides to react to it. So tell off your defenders, handle the flak you get yourself, and maybe people will think more of you. I assure you, people follow my blog for reasons other than I'm a female gamer and I find it highly insulting that you would even suggest that is the only reason people follow my blogs. I don't like special treatment for being female. In fact, I was very happy I didn't get any in WoW. Of course, it's fun to laugh about the few weird incidences that happen, but I am by no means proud nor encouraging of them. My blog is to write about my opinions and experiences. Just so happens I experience everything in the world as a woman, so I happen to mention that occassionally. I don't want to be treated better or worse for it. If you note, my "Guy Blog" isn't titled [Guy Blog], though that would undoubtedly have gotten me a lot more views and attention. I'm not going to tell off my "defenders," though. I think it is extremely rude to bash on someone when they go out on a limb for you, especially when they might just be defending me because they believe in what I'm saying, not because I have breasts. That doesn't mean I plan to cheer them on when I believe they are defending me just because of my gender, though.
You find it highly insulting. In the same way you're shocked that people react to you being a female gamer, despite all evidence you've personally experienced to the contrary? You're shocked and insulted too easily. Maybe I'm just too cynical, but considering your blog whining about having to wear clothes... well sorry, I do in fact expect that people are titillated and responding to that.
You say you don't like the special treatment, but you turn around and say you aren't going to stop people from continuing the cycle. If you allow yourself to be the woman who needs defending, you're perpetuating the image you claim to not want to exist.
My wife fights her own battles. If I jump in and she isn't actually in physical danger, she'll yell at me for acting like she can't handle things for herself. That's gender equality, and she's able to succeed at acting like one of the guys. She never gets shit as a female gamer for long, because she doesn't get thin-skinned, and she dishes it back until they run crying to mommy.
You want equality, that's how you get it. Equality on both sides of the line, not just the one where you don't like it.
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On July 15 2011 05:36 tofucake wrote:Show nested quote +On July 15 2011 05:35 TheAura wrote:
i dont see how any of this is her taking advantage. She posted a personally story about being a minority in the gaming scene, with a little bit of history of her life as well.
People post life stories and opinions all the time in these blogs, big deal.
is she taking advantage of her being a girl for attention here? no, she posted a blog expressing opinions and thoughts, like so many other people do.
the fact is, Riku, is that people are assholes.
Get used to it
. More asians play video games than white people. That makes me a minority. You know what would happen if I made a blog about being white?
You tofucolored pos. Don't you DARE write that blog and oppress me with your conformist culturally dominant beliefs.
In other news, I liked Riku's clock heart story. I think that was her? And I never read the one about panties and walking around naked. Anyone want to link?
Also, why do girls always reference boobs when they talk about gender differences? Plenty of guys have boobs too. I think the more significant difference is further down.
User was warned for this post
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You post a blog almost every day and they're always a story about yourself. If I met somebody in real life who was constantly talking about himself I would assume he wants attention really badly. Fine, you are who you are. But don't try to play yourself off as the victim. There are plenty of other female gamers and none of them receive anywhere near the same amount of hate.
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On July 15 2011 05:30 Dance. wrote:
I think the first blog of yours that i read was "damn clothes..." I don't know how you can consider that not brining attention to your gender. It was so random and pointless and you talked about walking around naked an how uncomfortable panties were...
I guess that was when I decided you were an attention whore who absolutely loves being know as a girl.
Why would you even say that? You can EASILY check what my first blog was. Here let me describe my first few blogs briefly with you:
1) Intro, plan to blog, plan to write magazine/website, video games
2) Easter, video games, Shakespeare costumes
3) How to make a costume (no gender, no pictures)
4) My laptop dying, Shakespeare
5) Hw, video games
6) Vindictus
7) Shakespeare play
...
Oh, but the Shakespeare blog did have a picture of me in my Shakespeare costume (though I was playing a male). I must being trying to get serious attention about my gender by posting those pictures!
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On July 15 2011 05:42 Riku wrote:Show nested quote +On July 15 2011 05:30 Dance. wrote:
I think the first blog of yours that i read was "damn clothes..." I don't know how you can consider that not brining attention to your gender. It was so random and pointless and you talked about walking around naked an how uncomfortable panties were...
I guess that was when I decided you were an attention whore who absolutely loves being know as a girl. Why would you even say that? You can EASILY check what my first blog was. Here let me describe my first few blogs briefly with you: 1) Intro, plan to blog, plan to write magazine/website, video games 2) Easter, video games, Shakespeare costumes 3) How to make a costume (no gender, no pictures) 4) My laptop dying, Shakespeare 5) Hw, video games 6) Vindictus 7) Shakespeare play ... Oh, but the Shakespeare blog did have a picture of me in my Shakespeare costume (though I was playing a male). I must being trying to get serious attention about my gender by posting those pictures!
He said the first one he read, not the first one you wrote. Maybe you should go drink a glass of water and calm down, you seem to be reacting instead of thinking and responding.
A lot of people just click on blogs with catchy names when they're in the little box on the left hand side.
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Hyrule19221 Posts
On July 15 2011 05:30 Dance. wrote:
I think the first blog of yours that i read was "damn clothes..." I don't know how you can consider that not brining attention to your gender. It was so random and pointless and you talked about walking around naked an how uncomfortable panties were...
I guess that was when I decided you were an attention whore who absolutely loves being know as a girl.
On July 15 2011 05:42 Riku wrote:
Why would you even say that? You can EASILY check what my first blog was. Here let me describe my first few blogs briefly with you:
And you complain about people responding before reading your entire post?
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People in MMO's just want to play the game, progress in content and while talking with people who are doing the same. If somebodies being an attention whore, almost every single time someone will call them out on it, I've played enough online games in my life where I've seen this happen all the time, if you crave attention people will hate on you/love you/not give a shit. It doesn't matter if your a girl or not, but every time it happens to a girl they play the gender card and act as if they are special for having to withstand the stress of being a girl that plays online games.
If a guy were to have done any of the things you did they probably would of gotten the same reaction.
TLDR: Can't figure out if all females are trolls, or just self centered
Just joking, I've played with plenty of girls who have had no problems at all because all they wanted to do was play the game, progress in content, while talking to people who were doing the same.
Real TLDR: Guys receive the same hate, your not special because of your gender.
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On July 15 2011 05:43 JingleHell wrote:Show nested quote +On July 15 2011 05:42 Riku wrote:On July 15 2011 05:30 Dance. wrote:
I think the first blog of yours that i read was "damn clothes..." I don't know how you can consider that not brining attention to your gender. It was so random and pointless and you talked about walking around naked an how uncomfortable panties were...
I guess that was when I decided you were an attention whore who absolutely loves being know as a girl. Why would you even say that? You can EASILY check what my first blog was. Here let me describe my first few blogs briefly with you: 1) Intro, plan to blog, plan to write magazine/website, video games 2) Easter, video games, Shakespeare costumes 3) How to make a costume (no gender, no pictures) 4) My laptop dying, Shakespeare 5) Hw, video games 6) Vindictus 7) Shakespeare play ... Oh, but the Shakespeare blog did have a picture of me in my Shakespeare costume (though I was playing a male). I must being trying to get serious attention about my gender by posting those pictures! He said the first one he read, not the first one you wrote. Maybe you should go drink a glass of water and calm down, you seem to be reacting instead of thinking and responding. A lot of people just click on blogs with catchy names when they're in the little box on the left hand side.
So you are saying making a snap judgement of a person's complete personality off a single post is good thing to practice?
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On July 15 2011 05:42 Riku wrote:Show nested quote +On July 15 2011 05:30 Dance. wrote:
I think the first blog of yours that i read was "damn clothes..." I don't know how you can consider that not brining attention to your gender. It was so random and pointless and you talked about walking around naked an how uncomfortable panties were...
I guess that was when I decided you were an attention whore who absolutely loves being know as a girl. Why would you even say that? You can EASILY check what my first blog was. Here let me describe my first few blogs briefly with you: 1) Intro, plan to blog, plan to write magazine/website, video games 2) Easter, video games, Shakespeare costumes 3) How to make a costume (no gender, no pictures) 4) My laptop dying, Shakespeare 5) Hw, video games 6) Vindictus 7) Shakespeare play ... Oh, but the Shakespeare blog did have a picture of me in my Shakespeare costume (though I was playing a male). I must being trying to get serious attention about my gender by posting those pictures!
Uhh... I said "first blog of yours that i read."
Don't get your panties in a bunch.
Wait...you are probably lying in bed naked.
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On July 15 2011 05:46 BloodNinja wrote:Show nested quote +On July 15 2011 05:43 JingleHell wrote:On July 15 2011 05:42 Riku wrote:On July 15 2011 05:30 Dance. wrote:
I think the first blog of yours that i read was "damn clothes..." I don't know how you can consider that not brining attention to your gender. It was so random and pointless and you talked about walking around naked an how uncomfortable panties were...
I guess that was when I decided you were an attention whore who absolutely loves being know as a girl. Why would you even say that? You can EASILY check what my first blog was. Here let me describe my first few blogs briefly with you: 1) Intro, plan to blog, plan to write magazine/website, video games 2) Easter, video games, Shakespeare costumes 3) How to make a costume (no gender, no pictures) 4) My laptop dying, Shakespeare 5) Hw, video games 6) Vindictus 7) Shakespeare play ... Oh, but the Shakespeare blog did have a picture of me in my Shakespeare costume (though I was playing a male). I must being trying to get serious attention about my gender by posting those pictures! He said the first one he read, not the first one you wrote. Maybe you should go drink a glass of water and calm down, you seem to be reacting instead of thinking and responding. A lot of people just click on blogs with catchy names when they're in the little box on the left hand side. So you are saying making a snap judgement of a person's complete personality off a single post is good thing to practice?
Whole personality? No, you think personalities are single-faceted? I can certainly deduce certain portions of personality from several, though, which is what I've done here.
And frankly, the worst people to listen to as far as personality traits are yourself and people who like you, in that order.
Very few people have the stones to be honest with their friends or people they like about their annoying quirks, and less can be honest with themselves.
Either way, I'm done with this, I don't feel the need to continue trying to give good advice where it isn't wanted, and I'm certainly not going to argue with the Riku Fanclub.
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EPT
