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I work at a restaurant and when it's not busy, everyone just chills at the back near the bar/empty dining lounge and just talks. A popular topic lately has been getting smashed and going to bars. I'm 19 and all my co-workers are older then me, so they feel obligated to tell me their own opinions of things and give me advice; I guess they think they are wise because of their age compared to mine.
So eventually they asked me about going to a bar to get smashed since I had just turned 19 a little while ago, (June 1) and I told them that I didn't drink. Then they asked if I smoked and I said no, and they acted as if this was the oddest thing they had ever heard and for the first time in my life, they actually criticised me for not drinking or smoking.
I'd like to point out that I put, 'actually criticised me' for not smoking or drinking; not because I think it's a better choice, but you can't really make a valid argument that's it's a bad choice. It's obviously healthier and I accept the fact that there are some things I miss out on. Just pointing this out so I don't receive comments about preaching how drinking and smoking are bad; because I could care less if anyone does really, it's their choice.
So basically, I was criticised by these people for the rest of the night about not drinking and one of the owners made the argument that I should be drinking; if for no other reason because everyone else where I work does and I wouldn't want to feel left out.
From then on, every night I work they bust my balls about not drinking with them. I've been thinking of some things to say to them about it, but the best I have come up with is:
"Your thirty-five with no education making as much as I do at nineteen, why would I take your life advice?"
Harsh, but rather factual. If your in your thirties making as much money as your nineteen your old co-worker, perhaps you should refrain by giving life advice and telling people how to better yourself. I don't want to turn into 'that guy' from work who everyone thinks is a dick, so I am curious if anyone has some good ideas about what to do. Two options I won't do:
1 ) Go drinking with them.
2 ) Let them bust my balls about this for the duration of my working tenure their.
So if anyone has any ideas, post away; or if you have a story or something that correlates to this, i'd like to hear it also.
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I'm in the same boat really. I was never the type to go out with the sports dudes/stoners and get absolutely smashed on the weekends. Just not my thing.
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I personally believe that after a certain age, your just not liable to start drinking and smoking if you haven't already. I tried to make the argument that I don't drink beer, so why would I go to a bar and purposely drink if I don't like the taste, but it totally went over their heads.
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United States11637 Posts
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The way I see it there isnt much purpose to smoke and drinking is for me only for celebratory occasions. Not to "hey lets go get hammered", thats just stupid e.e. Its pretty sad(funny) that they would bust your balls for having some standards and wanting to better your life. I dont know. Maybe they just dont want to grow up? Either way Id tell you to just keep doing what you're doing and work hard.
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why would u want to be friends with co workers
u know unless u wanted to use them for personal gain but seriously, its a competition in most fields and they seem like idiots either way; i wouldn't associate myself with them
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Say you have extremely low alcohol tolerance. Spin a tale about how you once had this one beer and then threw up everything you had for breakfast three days ago.
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haha or its like my friends they're like "Hey Justin, lets go smoke or go to a party and get fucked up(drinking)."
I typically say no im good and they bust my balls for "not wanting to hang out". i dont hang out like that sorry I have better things to do. Probably why I have a year of college left and they're failing(third year) and have completed at most 4 classes. GG? yes I believe so  and im only 20 mind you.
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i dont drink and i dont plan to either
i say let them talk shit and dont worry about whatever they say, like you said abstaining from alcohol is healthy
but im not one for parties and getting wasted and all that bullshit, but say what you feel and dw if people think you are 'that dick from work'
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getting drunk is fun? why not do it?
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Fuck them. The company you keep reflects on your character. Those people are thirty five and working in a restaurant for reasons that have to do with their character. Spending time with them will influence you. Now I'm not saying you shouldn't go out and experience things, or that the lives these people lead aren't just as worthwhile. But it's apparent their values and goals aren't like yours. If you want to live up to your values and achieve what you want in life, and believe me when you have later on it will be very rewarding, you have to be selective about the decisions you make.
There are going to people who say you ought to "try it" just to see what it's like, and I suppose I can't stop you if that's what you want to do, but there are lots of other things you can try to see if you like it -- like refusing to bend to pressure. And try to keep in mind that the people about to give you advice on this forum are likely in the same position as these 35 year olds. I'm telling you this from my experience as someone who's on his way to achieving what he wants. The decisions I've made have led me down a path I'm happy with, and I'm hoping the same can apply to you.
I know I'm sounding a bit prudish... but by all means, have fun. If you can handle it, drink socially a little. I wouldn't recommend smoking because the health risks there are a hell of a lot more real. I don't know anybody who does it that doesn't wish they didn't smoke, or could just quit. But have fun man... get wild. Just keep in mind what you really value. Never let anyone else's expectations of you change your expectations of yourself.
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I don't drink, nor smoke, and I intend to never do either.
Going to university in Scotland, you can imagine how much I hear about it.
Luckily, most of the people I know are understanding, and sometimes even respect me for staying true to my personal values.
But you're going to have to get used to people trying to pressure you into things. After all, that's what "peer pressure" is about, it's just that these people are being more vocal and active about it. So just shrug them aside, because all that matters is you, especially when it comes to something that I feel is a "life-threatening cause" (I just don't drink/smoke because I feel no need to, and the fact that it doesn't improve my health if I did simply helps solidify my own resolve).
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Oh hell, I've been pressured about drinking all the time. My friends always joke about how I don't drink or smoke, but that's just joking and I don't mind it then.
This bothers me because I have been hearing the most ridiculous arguments for drinking and smoking, but theres no one else around who I can turn to and say, 'Do you believe this shit?'. Literally everyone there shares the same position that if you don't drink or go to the bar, your some kind of leper. It's hard to explain, but it's if you were arguing with someone who insisted that apples were orange and everyone else backed this guy up; you'd pull your hair out.
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On July 26 2008 16:29 decafchicken wrote:
getting drunk is fun? why not do it?
some people want to be the best they can be, and alcohol even in small portions doesnt really benefit the body in anyway that something else already can, and getting drunk really isnt a small portion. really there are many other non drug related ways to have fun
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On July 26 2008 16:40 Salv wrote:
Oh hell, I've been pressured about drinking all the time. My friends always joke about how I don't drink or smoke, but that's just joking and I don't mind it then.
This bothers me because I have been hearing the most ridiculous arguments for drinking and smoking, but theres no one else around who I can turn to and say, 'Do you believe this shit?'. Literally everyone there shares the same position that if you don't drink or go to the bar, your some kind of leper. It's hard to explain, but it's if you were arguing with someone who insisted that apples were orange and everyone else backed this guy up; you'd pull your hair out.
i know your position, all my buddies at school get shitfaced every other weekend, and they arent even legally allowed to drink. just dont worry about it, when people start their arguments or fling shit at you just ignore it
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The OP is kind of a pussy.. He is thinking of things to say in the future. On the internet.
but either way man if i were you i would just not say anything, it will get old really soon and they will realize that they are kind of immature when you dont respond.. Saying some planned out shit will do nothing but make you look even more stupid..
Im high right now so im probably being a dick,. smoking weed=not addicting + very fun + fun +very fun + lol=yeqaaa oranges
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On July 26 2008 16:46 Hypnosis wrote:
The OP is kind of a pussy.. He is thinking of things to say in the future. On the internet.
but either way man if i were you i would just not say anything, it will get old really soon and they will realize that they are kind of immature when you dont respond.. Saying some planned out shit will do nothing but make you look even more stupid..
Im high right now so im probably being a dick,. smoking weed=not addicting + very fun + fun +very fun + lol=yeqaaa oranges
fine example >.>
Waterboy quote "Which brings me to my next point, don't do crack"
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United States24776 Posts
One thing you can do is try to be more assertive than the guys pressuring you. If you make it clear that you are cool with their decisions, but there's no way in hell they are convincing you to drink/smoke, then they might back off a little... that is unless they are complete idiots like some of the people you might be associating with. If they really won't leave you alone about it no matter how much you try, then there's no point in associating with them socially. If the boss won't reasonably allow you to request that everyone stop bugging you about it during work, then it is no longer a good working environment... and decide whether or not you'll actually stick with it.
On July 26 2008 16:42 JohnColtrane wrote:Show nested quote +On July 26 2008 16:29 decafchicken wrote:
getting drunk is fun? why not do it? some people want to be the best they can be, and alcohol even in small portions doesnt really benefit the body in anyway that something else already can, and getting drunk really isnt a small portion. really there are many other non drug related ways to have fun
Additionally not everyone actually enjoys being drunk. If I become affected by alcohol, I just get angry... and that's no fun!
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On July 26 2008 16:46 Hypnosis wrote:
The OP is kind of a pussy.. He is thinking of things to say in the future. On the internet.
but either way man if i were you i would just not say anything, it will get old really soon and they will realize that they are kind of immature when you dont respond.. Saying some planned out shit will do nothing but make you look even more stupid..
Im high right now so im probably being a dick,. smoking weed=not addicting + very fun + fun +very fun + lol=yeqaaa oranges
Your post lacks a lot of things; but mostly logic. If I made a post asking for comebacks to say to my coworkers, then you could call me a pussy. You would still be a dick for doing it, but at least people could understand where you were coming from.
The OP was asking/ encouraging two things:
1 ) Others to post a situation that is relevant to this.
2 ) Hear other peoples opinion on the ridiculous nature of my coworkers argument.
I have a hard time trying to understand what your even saying.
On July 26 2008 16:46 Hypnosis wrote:
but either way man if i were you i would just not say anything, .
OK
On July 26 2008 16:46 Hypnosis wrote:
it will get old really soon
Wait, what will? Responding to their arguments? Responding to someone when they are talking to you will get old? Sounds stupid to have to ask that, but you just told me I should say nothing. So apparently saying something to someone talking at me will get old. Ok.
On July 26 2008 16:46 Hypnosis wrote:
they will realize that they are kind of immature when you dont respond.
Now I should respond? You just said I shouldn't respond, because that gets old, but now I should, because then I will look immature.
On July 26 2008 16:46 Hypnosis wrote:
Im high right now
At least this is an excuse for your post and the nature of it.
On July 26 2008 16:46 Hypnosis wrote:
so im probably being a dick,
Good call.
On July 26 2008 16:46 Hypnosis wrote:
smoking weed=not addicting + very fun + fun +very fun + lol=yeqaaa oranges
Great point.
Your post has no merit.
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United States24776 Posts
On July 26 2008 17:00 Salv wrote:Wait, what will? Responding to their arguments? Responding to someone when they are talking to you will get old? Sounds stupid to have to ask that, but you just told me I should say nothing. So apparently saying something to someone talking at me will get old. Ok. Show nested quote +On July 26 2008 16:46 Hypnosis wrote:
they will realize that they are kind of immature when you dont respond. Now I should respond? You just said I shouldn't respond, because that gets old, but now I should, because then I will look immature.
I believe he meant if you ignore them their attempts to bug you will get old.
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EPT
