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This is personal blog, not about E-sport as a whole. Just saying.
I've been meaning to get some practice in SC II again and SC R lately, but I feel so demotivated doing so. I discovered today that for the first time in a year I'm actually struggling to get back into Diamond. It feels unreal, I had a peak mmr at 4.7k and now I'm struggling against 3.6-3.7k rated players. It's depressing af. I don't know what happened to me. I can't get the practice down anymore like I used to, nor can I get myself to my old level of play.
It makes me sad looking back at the 1000+ hours I've spent practicing and now I'm back into mediocre play. I can barely find enjoyment from the game anymore.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not an elitist who has to be good at everything I do but playing well is part of the fun in any game I play.
The sad thing is in a way it's just history repeating itself. I've always been a very unstable 1v1 player. I would go on playing crazy good and get insane win streaks and tilt and fall 500 mmr the next two days. I don't know why I'm like that but hey, that's life.
My mouse semi broke too during practice so I can't play SC2 for a few days anyway...
I just wanted to share this so people know that not every player gets better overtime with practice, I feel like i've just gotten worse since my peak in late 2016.
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I had that in Dota...
peaked at just over 5k - but somehow managed to drop all the way to 3.9 within a couple of months.
Up to 4.5 again for now - but that was a pretty bad losing streak.
I took a week off to clear my mind and then got back into it.
Also (this is almost 10 years ago now) when I was trying my hardest at Broodwar - this helped me quite a bit:
- get some sort of meal plan, try and be halthy
- work out, at least to some extent
- take regular breaks, ideally with some fresh air included.
For a few months before doing that, I used to live on takeaways, red bull and weed. That was baaaaad.
I felt so much better after cutting out the crap and getting a decent routine going - not only gaming wise obviously.
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Don't worry I'm in the exact same spot like you, I was 5400 MMR a month ago and now I'm struggling at 5k MMR despite playing constantly.
This up and down is happening all the time to me since I reached master league. I just can't improve anymore.
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The sad thing is in a way it's just history repeating itself. I've always been a very unstable 1v1 player. I would go on playing crazy good and get insane win streaks and tilt and fall 500 mmr the next two days. I don't know why I'm like that but hey, that's life.
i've always been like this as a player as well.. not so much the tilt really, but i will play really well for a few days and really feel like i'm "getting" it (whatever i'm trying to understand/improve at), and then i'll get thrown off kilter by something in game or irl and decline for the next few days. in sc2, bw, poker, all 3.
i've kinda just come to accept that that's how i am as a person, and that the time that i spend practicing bw or poker isn't time spent boosting my mmr or fattening my bankroll, rather it's more time spent trying to understand who i am as a competitive player so that i can be stronger in subsequent games to increase consistency and marginalize variance as much as possible. personally, i think that's the healthiest way to approach competition.
also, if you're feeling burnt out then take a break. don't push yourself just because you want to improve when you don't have the right mindset for it. quoting from the book "easy game," be smarter than you are proud. you might have the pride of an A level iccup player but only the consistency of a B level player. if you try to constantly play at an A level and then freak out every time you game (especially in my experience to D or C level players, which WILL happen), then you'll end up tearing your hair out. everyone drops games, but it's important to remember to play with a realistic image of who you are as a player. likewise, if you can't consistently beat A players then it's stupid to get frustrated with yourself out of pride. focus that energy on discovering why you're not winning and you'll improve much faster. any time that you feel tilt or anger in game, realize that that energy and attention can be way more productively redirected to a more advantageous outlet.
finally, remember that just grinding games will improve your mechanics (sometimes), but it rarely improves your builds or gamesense which are both very important and easily ignoreable contributors to your winrate. sometimes you just have to think about the game instead of grinding for 1k hours
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Never give up & Never surrender! Keep fighting bro, things will get better.  I think every competitive player has gone through these sorts of struggles before, it happens in any game. No worries, keep ya head up~
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If you're not aiming to qualify for big tournaments it's fine.
Just get your mechanics back in order and the game will open back up again.
A lot of players are discovering this playing SCR after not touching the game in years you're not alone!
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Everyone thinks of skill as like this straight line that either goes up or down. Honestly, it's more like looking at a stock-exchange graph. As you go up or down, you zig-zag your way up and down. It's because sometimes you have good days, and sometimes you have bad days. If you work hard and do your homework, you will get better.
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if you're really having a tough time, my advice is to walk away for a bit if its a bit overwhelming, as that can do wonders. Or if you are still wanting to play try to focus on something that you're definitely fucking up on and work on that. Win or lose, if you can find improvements along the way that really helps.
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France12904 Posts
You should focus on relaxing and enjoying the game / progress without looking at MMR and stuff.
Basically don't be too hard on yourself for losing against seemingly worse players, just quickly accept the defeat (try to see what went bad) and move on to the next game with a clear mind.
I sometimes played way worse when my mechanics were very sharp, but my mindset was very bad, than when I felt I couldn't even move properly the mouse (cold hands and stuff), but had more time to think about decisions.
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EPT
