EPTFrom your description of him you should allow her to sleep with him only if you yourself get a turn with him. If you bring it up with him he will probably think you two are freaks and will stay away from her and if not you get to experience the cgi ab hero yourself!
Girl problem - need help. - Page 5
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Awesomedrifter
Canada62 Posts
From your description of him you should allow her to sleep with him only if you yourself get a turn with him. If you bring it up with him he will probably think you two are freaks and will stay away from her and if not you get to experience the cgi ab hero yourself! | ||
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Ej_
47656 Posts
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ahswtini
Northern Ireland22208 Posts
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oBlade
United States5749 Posts
On January 16 2015 12:44 KING CHARLIE :D wrote:I am NEVER going to be the hot, battle-hardened warrior next door with six-packs and seven-inches. Simply based on my genetics… that is a desire of hers that I, myself, could NEVER fulfill. On January 17 2015 10:45 KING CHARLIE :D wrote: My point is: mine is a unique situation in that this is a desire of hers that I can NEVER fulfill, simply by virtue of my genetics. I feel like this point got passed over somehow but how do either of you already know your neighbor's cock size? And if that's the crux of what's going on here they make extendable dildo condoms or something you can wear. This communication should really happen with your partner anyway. What do we here know about what both of you want? There's nothing wrong with having a relationship that's open for one or both people, especially people who settled into a long term relationship without much sexual experience. Which by the way it's also naive to think one night with this random neighbor (who you for some reason have hyped up as an automatically dynamite lover) will be life changing, either in the sense that she would leave you or in the sense that it would scratch every itch of curiosity she has and fulfill her so that she is in total sexual nirvana with her own body and has nothing left to learn. | ||
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slytown
Korea (South)1411 Posts
You really need to ask her if she wants to, and more importantly if he wants to, and whether she'd be OK with you having sex with someone else. The thing about marriage is everyone has their own interpretation of its function. It can be a commitment or modus operandi, legal bond, tradition, attempt at assimilation (vis a vis the increase in gay marriages), etc. If you don't mind it then let her have it (so to speak.) BUT, don't tell her its OK non-chalantly. Though reasons for marriage may be different, I think it should however be an honest relationship with good communication. Sit her down and hash-it out like adults. Let each other know where your emotions are. Sex is a weird thing; an impulse. Some couples try to hide them and some indulge, which usually ends in heartache. Make sure this is just an impulse that ALL THREE PARTIES ARE OK WITH. Don't forget the marine's emotions as well. I'd be weirded out if my neighbor, who I knew was married, tried to have sex with me. | ||
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hp.Shell
United States2527 Posts
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fluffy_pylon
United States79 Posts
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B.I.G.
3251 Posts
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fluffy_pylon
United States79 Posts
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myminerals
560 Posts
After reading this thread I think Stratos_speAr summed it up nicely. I think the guy has serious issues and my impression grew only stronger with his every post here. | ||
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lisward
Singapore959 Posts
Also, were you the guy that used to do those crazy ass stories about his family with those stick figures? If so you are my favorite blogger here :D | ||
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maggle
Australia70 Posts
Honestly, I think you're getting into your own head. You're trying way too hard to convince yourself that you should be okay with her sleeping with another man but the truth is you can't translate your rationale into feelings and that's why you're confused and seeking advice. If you truly felt the same way you thought, you wouldn't be asking for advice. You need to consider your feelings first and foremost and understand why you feel that way as opposed to why you shouldn't feel that way. You also need to consider the consequences of your choices. Are you truly going to be able to continue your relationship like nothing happened? | ||
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ROOTFayth
Canada3351 Posts
I agree with pretty much everything Stratos said btw | ||
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419
Russian Federation3631 Posts
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LoneYoShi
France1348 Posts
We are saying that by doing this, you might risk losing her. Your answer is that if she is happier with another man, then good for her (and thus by extension good for you since you only want her to be happy). But that line of thought completely bypasses your own needs. Yes, you want her to be happy. And wanting her to be happy with someone else is all nice and dandy in theory, but in practice a breakup will make you suffer and leave you devastated (especially if you love her as much as you say you do). Even if you know it that she will be happier with another man, losing her will still destroy you. This is why most of us, in your situation, would not go through with it. You say it's insecurities, I don't agree. At one point, it's about self preservation. So either we don't assess the risk of losing her the same way and you're blindly confident that your wife, who wants to have sex with another man, will never leave you. Or you don't mind losing her too much. And that means either you don't mind getting your heart ripped out (being a martyr for a loved one's happiness might seem noble to some), or you don't love her as you say you do. In both cases, it doesn't really make sense to me (and to the rest of the TL people). | ||
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iloveav
Poland1478 Posts
THis is a bit of a strange situation for anyone (including the ones giving you advice). First thing Id like to point out: The only reason I am giving you advice (sort of) is because you asked for it. I don't think anyone can accurately understand your situation, so I doubt anyone can give you a good advice (not to mention that this is highly subjective). That being said, lets look at some of the facts: First, You say you are 25 and got married 8 years ago. Quick math: you got married when you were 17. Was she also 17 at the time? I ask because at 17, most people don't know what they want at all. And it does show. Second, have you ever considered that you might be happier without her? I am not saying to leave her, I am wondering if you are able to choose a different path, or if you are unable to see a life without her. Third, Do you put much weight into feelings, trust, love, etc? The way I see it, If she wants to do something that will be "maybe" great for her, that will last a short period of time and In return almost certainly damage your marriage and you for a very long time... She does sound very selfish and I would not want to be with someone like that. Generally speaking, by telling you she is shifting the guilt onto you: A) You tell her No, and that means you are the one not letting her do what she wants. B) You tell her Yes, so if anything negative comes from it, you are the one to blame because you chose it. The only good answer to a question like that is: You are a grown up, you make that decision, and live with the consequences. Best case scenario is still not something positive in this case while almost any other case scenario flat out sucks, so why bother? | ||
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iloveav
Poland1478 Posts
I dont even want to begin to imagine a life with someone who cares so little about me. | ||
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FreeZEternal
Korea (South)3396 Posts
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Bswhunter
Australia954 Posts
I'm a fucking directionless 20 y old who is battling a chronic illness, but I would really suggest the book 'Sex at Dawn' by Chris Ryan. Its a fantastic breakdown of the entire dynamic of human sexuality. I really hope you get through this OP. | ||
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lohdon
170 Posts
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