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I love Mike and Ikes. Actually I just love candy in general. Sometimes I'll eat several pounds of candy in one day.
I think I got my super duper sweet tooth because of how restricted my access to junk food was when I was little. You see, when I was a little kid, I was extremely hyper and had some behavioral problems. Sitting still was out of the question (still is, to be honest). My mom noticed that often when I was bouncing off the walls particularly hard my ear would be bright red, as if I was having an allergic reaction. She wondered if maybe I was allergic to some chemical or something that was causing me to bounce off the wall and misbehave.
And so it was that she decided to put me on this elimination diet when I was about four. I was not allowed to eat wheat, yeast, milk, eggs, food coloring, peanuts, apples, mint, or sugar. Yeah, life kind of sucked. Whenever I'd be left in somebody else's care, she'd simply tell them that I was allergic to all of these things, since that was simpler than explaining what the hell an elimination diet was.
God I hated it. Constantly seeing every other kid around me eating ice cream, pizza, candy, and everything else good while I was stuck eating cashew butter on rice flour bread just sucked. Oh yeah, and there's a reason people use wheat to make bread, people: gluten is sticky and gives the bread a good texture. Rice flour and shit produces bread that has the texture of a pile of stale crumbs.
But yeah. Anyway, predictably my mom realized that I was just a bad kid with ADHD and she put me on adderall instead when I was in 5th grade. And damn, let me tell you, there's a reason everyone puts their kids on meds these days: they work. It was almost like a magic mind-altering pill of good behavior! I was suddenly able to sit still (for a little while), remember to raise my hand before speaking (sometimes), and even control myself when someone pissed me off (unless they really pissed me off, hehe).
Now let's see... what was I talking about? Oh yeah, candy. So even though I was off these elimination diets, my mom is still the biggest health nazi ever, you see, so I still wasn't allowed to eat anything she deemed unhealthy: no sugary cereal, nothing with white flour (whole-wheat bread is gross, btw), no candy, no cookies around the house, it sucked.
So one day when she was busy doing work and stuff I walked down the hill to the store and spent about $12 on candy with a friend. I remember I snuck it into my house by sticking it down my pants (don't worry, I don't go commando), and I was incredibly nervous that she'd catch me but she didn't!
I hid it under my bed and for the first time in my entire life I was able to eat candy till I felt sick. Oh it was the best feeling ever! It was better than the first time I jacked off!
But that whole feeling sick thing after eating too much candy was really a bummer. Like, candy tastes good, I wish I could just keep eating it without feeling sick.
I quickly discovered that certain candies have a much higher... uh... Sickness Saturation Value (SSV), yeah, that sounds good. So as I was saying before I was interrupted by my own ADHD thoughts, certain candies have a much higher SSV than others. Things like snickers, butterfingers, and chocolatey things in general tend to have a much higher SSV than fruity things like skittles. I found that while just a handful of snickers would have me feeling sick, I could eat an entire bulk-sized bag of stittles [spoiler]![[image loading]](http://warfieldfamily.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/DSC_4229-640x426.jpg) and only feel slightly sick afterwords.
Other fruity candies also tended to have a much lower SSV than chocolate things like snickers as well. Mike and Ikes has a fairly low SSV (though not as low as Skittles). I really like Mike and Ikes. They're awesome and chewy. Sometimes I like to suck on them until the sugary color coating comes off completely, and then eat the clear gelatinous cores. I also like to do this with skittles. Is it weird that when doing this, I always take the candy out of my mouth to enjoy the view of the cores? I just like to take a moment to appreciate my "hard work" before eating it, and the more candy I'm able to keep in my mouth at one time before eating it, the more rewarding it is to chomp down on those naked cores.
Okay, well that's the end of this random blog. Stay tuned for more ADHD-fueled randomness!
  
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So wait... the first time you ate a bag of candy was after the first time you jacked off?
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On July 19 2014 02:43 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:
So wait... the first time you ate a bag of candy was after the first time you jacked off?
No, it was slightly before, and it wasn't the first time (occasionally I'd be allowed to have some candy in very moderate helpings, and by moderate I mean extremely stingy, but that was the first time I was allowed to truly stuff my face). I just used that example because the first time I jacked off I thought "oh wow, that was pretty epic but not quite as epic as that first face-stuffing of candy".
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So you're that one guy who likes Mike and Ikes.
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I used to feel the same way about candy. Maybe its just that I'm getting too old but now reading your blog I'm just hoping that you brushed your teeth and ate a salad after your candy binges. I used to eat skittles by the pound too, but that sick feeling you get afterwords has ruined it for me, also the fuzzy coated in sugar feeling your teeth get. Also when you get sore taste buds from the sugar. Ya, I don't really do that anymore haha
I'm glad DPB clarified that little chronological detail as I was also surprised by that ordering haha
I'm glad you like Mike and Ikes dude, just channel some of that ADHD into a run or something occasionally so that you can get away with eating them more often later in life.
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United States3291 Posts
Mike and ikes are sooo good
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yo
candy is pretty good
skittles mike and ikes and starbursts.
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I love skittles, but Mike and Ikes and Starbursts get stuck in my teeth, which is the WORST feeling ever.
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I love to do the exact same thing with Mike and Ikes...so good..
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On July 19 2014 09:57 rpddropshot wrote:
I love to do the exact same thing with Mike and Ikes...so good..
When I eat peanut butter M&Ms I'll sometimes try and chip the chocolate off without damaging the peanut-butter disc. Usually to do this I'll apply pressure on the top and bottom of the m&m with my front teeth until it cracks, and then I try and gently peal each side off the peanut-butter disc. Then I put the disc in a pile on a small plate. When I have enough peanut-butter discs, I'll eat them all at once.
I imagine it looks absolutely disgusting to observers (lol I don't care if I gross out observers 'cause fuck Protoss), but it's just this ritual I've developed. Idk, it makes eating candy more fun to have these rituals.
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For like 4 months I was addicted to Skittles. I use to eat a 3LB? bag (the resealable bag that cost $8) in like 2 maybe 3 days, at least twice a month. I would get to the point where I didn't even want them any more yet I kept eating them. It was ridiculous thinking back on it.
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Candy is the best thing ever, and this blog is 5/5. I will post a picture of my candy drawer when I have time.
I also love dissolving the color from candy, I like to remove the color from skittles and then eat random ones for interesting flavor combinations. :D
CANDY IS LIFE!
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On July 20 2014 10:05 Zambrah wrote:
Candy is the best thing ever, and this blog is 5/5. I will post a picture of my candy drawer when I have time.
I also love dissolving the color from candy, I like to remove the color from skittles and then eat random ones for interesting flavor combinations. :D
CANDY IS LIFE!
Hmmm, that's an interesting point. I like to suck the color coating off of skittles and eat the white cores too, but for me it was more about getting a nice big mouthfull of the gooey cores without the crunchy sugar coating disrupting it, and of course having to "work" for it a bit. And the longer you're willing to "work", the gooer and more pure the cores will be!
But yeah, your point about removing the sugar coating adding to the "surprise" value is quite interesting. I can see myself de-sugar-coating a mouthful of skittles and then take the skittles out of my mouth and eat them one at a time, trying to guess the flavor of each one. Of course, that would be absolutely disgusting to any spectators, but hey, that's what you get for staring, right?
And also there isn't any way to check my accuracy, since the sugar coating will already have been removed, but hey, nothing's perfect.
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EPT
