So I'm sitting in class and it's break time. The teacher leaves with her purse for 15 minutes because she's scared someone will steal something out of it. Like she can't trust us. Anyway, my buddy who usually sits next to me is watching clips from Orange is the New Black, a show about attractive women being in prison and basically having lesbian sex with each other. I got excited for that show when I saw Laura Prepon (Donna from That 70s Show) being naked in the shower with the main character chick.
Anyway, my friend is a normal Jewish guy. He has an apartment in Newark where he spends the week and goes back to Queens (where he's originally from) and comes back here on Sunday by train. It all started as a wacky conversation starter. I asked him if he knew about NASA and was interested in astronomy. I almost expected a Uranus joke because he is pretty immature at times (and equally serious at other times). But instead it shifted to Stephen Hawking not believing in black holes. There's another guy in my class who is a bit of a joker/prankster. He walks by with a bag of chips overhearing us talking and offers his 2 cents. "Of course he doesn't believe in black holes, he's never seen a vagina". Now disregarding the inappropriateness of that comment, he does have a point. Another guy joins the conversation. "Well to be fair it is hard to have sex in a wheelchair."
At this point I'm utterly disgusted by the barbarism of these attitudes from otherwise intelligent young gentlemen and I make my way for the restroom. While there I come across Kaitlyn the girl I admire and lust after as she is tall yet feminine, skinny yet shapely, and has the face of supermodel yet is somehow insecure. The combination of all these elements makes her so endearing in my eyes. As I'm urinating a curious thought enters my head about pulsars. They pulsate and emit light. And then I remember something else that pulsates. Vibrators. And the thought is so curious as I'm touching something that vaguely resembles one albeit much more diminutive than commercially manufactured products of that variety.
As I make my way back to class I see Kaitlyn eating a banana. Normally she is not a sexy eater. But that day time was passing very slowly. I almost wished to enter a wormhole to repeat the actions I was witnessing repeatedly. With the idea of bananas spinning in my head, I started to wonder what exactly the distinction was between vibrators, dildos, and strap-ons. They all look alike and serves generally the same purpose, I reasoned to myself.
Going back to my friend I mentioned earlier, the Jewish guy. He once told a story of being hit on by a bisexual male. Now my friend is as straight as a whistle but he is secure enough in his sexuality to discuss such controversial issues. I asked him what the difference was between the three products I brought up.
His response was simple, direct, and provocative: "Were you watching Kaitlyn eating that banana in class too"?
Then I had an idea. "Hey, why do you suppose the professor is so protective of her purse?" My friend: "Yeah it's like she's trying to hide something." Me: "Yes and where do you suppose she goes during the 15 minute break? And why does our class have 15 minute breaks when other professors have only 10 minute ones?"
We both smile with strange thoughts whirling in our heads
vibrators are battery operated and... vibrate dildos are manually operated strap ons are supposed to be worn
Also the Stephen Hawking thing pertains to the event horizon (which is a necessity for what we commonly think of as black holes) and not the singularity. He thinks that the matter or information has to be spit out in some indistinguishable form for it to be consistent with quantum theory. But the headline "Hawking does not believe in black holes" sells more I guess
On January 28 2014 16:45 Complete wrote: The joys of high school!
Emotionally I do often feel like a high schooler
On January 28 2014 16:47 DarkPlasmaBall wrote: He's in high school? His classmate owns an apartment in Newark... and with 15 minute breaks in the middle of class, it sounds like he's in college.
NeuroticPsychosis I don't suppose you go to NJIT?
Nope, I'm practically across the street though at Rutgers Business School
OP is struggling to figure out the current meta of sex
You sound like that type of guy who, if presented with a vagina in front of you, would gently touch it with your finger and go something like "this sure is wet".
On January 28 2014 20:34 Crushinator wrote: Bananas always make me wonder how evolution can account for the fact that they so perfectly fit the human vagina.
There's another guy in my class who is a bit of a joker/prankster. He walks by with a bag of chips overhearing us talking and offers his 2 cents. "Of course he doesn't believe in black holes, he's never seen a vagina".
God dammit im so immature hahaha.
Good blog Sounds like a job for the Mystery Machine
You sound like that type of guy who, if presented with a vagina in front of you, would gently touch it with your finger and go something like "this sure is wet".
On January 28 2014 20:34 Crushinator wrote: Bananas always make me wonder how evolution can account for the fact that they so perfectly fit the human vagina.
wtf, I didn't know this idiot was some sort of celebrity. I've seen him many times preaching his retarded logic anti evolution and had this crappy circular logic question spiel about making everyone a sinner.
EPT
