EPTNew girl advice general (relationship blog) - Page 3
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iamahydralisk
United States813 Posts
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Mstring
Australia510 Posts
On December 31 2012 12:40 iamahydralisk wrote: I was pissed because it seemed like she hadn't truly listened to a word I said. You said it best: girls are different. She listened, but girls work on a different plane. You spoke in words but she heard the intent, the feeling, what your heart was saying. All she heard was your frustration when she really wants you to be a rock solid core. There's only so much a person can unload 'negative feelings' onto a rock solid core before it becomes futile and they melt around it. | ||
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iamahydralisk
United States813 Posts
On December 31 2012 12:46 Mstring wrote: You said it best: girls are different. She listened, but girls work on a different plane. You spoke in words but she heard the intent, the feeling, what your heart was saying. All she heard was your frustration when she really wants you to be a rock solid core. I disagree. I don't think you can say it's possibly a problem on my end when she's the one who's been cranky practically all the time lately (which she admits, and she says it's not because of me) and she's the one who's just unloading tons of negativity on me with reckless abandon. it's pretty easy to understand why it's hard to be around someone who's constantly picking at you, and even worse when they don't realize it. | ||
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Mstring
Australia510 Posts
What is it you disagree with? You don't think she's perceptive of your frustration and confusion? | ||
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iamahydralisk
United States813 Posts
On December 31 2012 13:02 Mstring wrote: What is it you disagree with? You don't think she's perceptive of your frustration and confusion? I disagree that me being a "rock solid core" would make the situation much better. She'd still be using me as an outlet for her frustrations. Maybe more so, even, because if I didn't let on that it was bothering me, she might get even worse without realizing it. | ||
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Mstring
Australia510 Posts
On December 31 2012 13:04 iamahydralisk wrote: I disagree that me being a "rock solid core" would make the situation much better. All I'm saying is that's what she wants; a solid masculine core, not someone she can't trust to not walk out when the going gets tough. She is probably just as frustrated and confused by the situation as you are. I don't have any recommendations for your situation, only for your character and personal development so you can make your own decisions in each moment. She'd still be using me as an outlet for her frustrations. If you are looking for an escape from this I think you'll have to start dating men XD | ||
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GnarlyArbitrage
575 Posts
On December 31 2012 12:43 iamahydralisk wrote: and by the way, it wasn't even me apologizing for winning. I agree that'd be a douche thing to say. it was more along the lines of "I'm sorry the game's being so unfair to you" which is a logical thing to say because if you've played any mario party game, you know it's largely based on chance anyway. regardless though, I was on my absolute best behavior after that (as I always am when I can tell she's cranky) and she still used me as the primary outlet for her frustration. that's what I'm sick of. I can't be with someone or be around someone who takes out all of their negative feelings on me. Is it logical to say that a game of chance is unfair to women? Are you saying that? Because a game of chance, to me, seems like a pretty fair deal if everyone gets the same chances. Kind of like poker. Unlike blackjack, where the house has the inherent advantage, poker is a level playing field. Much like mario party. Just an observation. Also, it seems like you're protecting your gf or whatever from whatever. Don't be a father to her, be an equal. Don't protect her from bullshit trivial things like losing in a game. Protect her from someone that is trying to cause her physical harm or something. | ||
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iamahydralisk
United States813 Posts
On December 31 2012 13:08 Mstring wrote: All I'm saying is that's what she wants; a solid masculine core, not someone she can't trust to not walk out when the going gets tough. She is probably just as frustrated and confused by the situation as you are. I don't have any recommendations for your situation, only for your character and personal development. If you are looking for an escape from this I think you'll have to start dating men XD trust me, I've considered it  lolIs it logical to say that a game of chance is unfair to women? Are you saying that? Because a game of chance, to me, seems like a pretty fair deal if everyone gets the same chances. Kind of like poker. Unlike blackjack, where the house has the inherent advantage, poker is a level playing field. Much like mario party. Just an observation. Also, it seems like you're protecting your gf or whatever from whatever. Don't be a father to her, be an equal. Don't protect her from bullshit trivial things like losing in a game. Protect her from someone that is trying to cause her physical harm or something. no, I'm saying it's logical to comfort her when a. she's upset, b. it's a game of chance and c. she's getting the short end of the stick from the game. nothing to do with her gender. | ||
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Mstring
Australia510 Posts
On December 31 2012 13:14 iamahydralisk wrote: trust me, I've considered it lolno, I'm saying it's logical to comfort her when a. she's upset, b. it's a game of chance and c. she's getting the short end of the stick from the game. nothing to do with her gender. You're still seeing her "problems" though a lense of man-logic. Saying that the game is unfair or whatever is logical and true but does nothing to solve the emotional issue at hand. You solve the emotional issue by laughing like a crazy man because you're so good at the game, then taking her out for ice-cream at the beach*. *or whatever the hell you want. ANYTHING BUT talking about the issues like you would man to man. To paraphrase the book it would behoove you to read: if you are talking with a woman about an emotional state that she is still in, you are on the wrong path already. | ||
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iamahydralisk
United States813 Posts
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GnarlyArbitrage
575 Posts
On December 31 2012 13:14 iamahydralisk wrote: trust me, I've considered it lolno, I'm saying it's logical to comfort her when a. she's upset, b. it's a game of chance and c. she's getting the short end of the stick from the game. nothing to do with her gender. You're saying the chances are not fair for her, but if it's a game of chance, then shouldn't the chances be the same? Is it the controller she is using? The character she picks? There should be absolutely no fucking reason why the game should be unfair to her. I've played the game before and I know it's a level playing field. I think you're just projecting something here... | ||
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Mstring
Australia510 Posts
On December 31 2012 13:20 iamahydralisk wrote: she'd think I was laughing at her You'll never know if you are always worried about how you'll be received. Besides, if your intent is pure, why would you even consider this as a possibility? | ||
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iamahydralisk
United States813 Posts
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iamahydralisk
United States813 Posts
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MarlieChurphy
United States2063 Posts
If you don't know, this is a radio program that has been on the air since the 80s and deals with everything from relationships, drugs/addictions, people, psychology, diseases, and life. It is also a very funny and generally intelligent show. When I get around to it, I will upload a 'best of' and/or 'most informative' onto youtube or something and make a thread. If you guys will take the time to listen to the stuff, or maybe just the show itself. You won't be so confused and won't be making so many "girl help threads". + Show Spoiler + http://thepiratebay.se/torrent/6276179/Loveline_Archive PS- In the last year alone, I have learned so much and noticed many of the topics on the show in my own shortcomings regarding ~relationhardshipwrecks, and I'm 28.5 years old. Probably the single most important thing I have done in the last 5 years, maybe more, has been listening to this show religiously. | ||
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Griffiththehawk
United States14 Posts
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iamahydralisk
United States813 Posts
On January 19 2013 13:07 Griffiththehawk wrote: have you tried morphing into a lurker? nah man. I'm from russia. | ||
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matthewfoulkes
United Kingdom246 Posts
choice 1: cut that bitch loose....since you are clearly not willing to admit any fault whatsoever on your part and you think you are clearly a perfect partner, it may be best to just drop it and find someone who will put up better with that side of you. choice 2: straight up explain where you stand like a fucking man, don't be a pussy just be like look, your constantly negative and i'm trying to enjoy my life and be a positive person, if you can't do that then you can't be part of my life. this way if it was done it was done but if it has a chance then will get to see this and if she doesn't change up her atitude/stop acting like a dick....call her out on it again, not in a whiny bitchy way like ughhhh stop being so moody, just be cool, just be like stop acting up its childish and embarrassing. but maybe you aren't sexually pleasing her....if the sex is weak as fuck it would explain the symptons i would be cranky as fuck if my partner hadn't got me to orgasm for the duration of our relationship, sometimes fucking the shit out of a girl is the solution to your relationship problem as much as your 'emotional and caring' side think it isn't | ||
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SamsungStar
United States912 Posts
On January 19 2013 13:07 Griffiththehawk wrote: have you tried morphing into a lurker? I loled SO damn hard. Also, I agree with the guy above me. She's showing so many of the classic symptoms of a girl who's not getting laid right. In my experience, cock magic works way better on women than trying to engage with them in the treacherous swamplands of emotion/feelings. That is a territory best left to the likes of women, poets, and Bob Ross. | ||
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