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Beijing Blues, Part 3

Blogs > Shady Sands
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Shady Sands
Profile Blog Joined June 2012
United States4021 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-09-11 00:57:42
September 10 2012 05:37 GMT
#1
Read Part 2 here: http://www.teamliquid.net/blogs/viewblog.php?topic_id=367461



Earlier, I mentioned that I house-sat for someone. What that means is that some rich dude bought an apartment in Beijing as an investment (well, several, actually), and he let me live in one for free (since he and my father had kept in touch over the years). I couldn't complain, given how expensive housing in Beijing was. The alternative was living with my grandparents, and while I wouldn't mind, Sylvia would have.

There were a few tradeoffs, though. The apartment was just that: an apartment.

No aircon.

No internet.

No hot water heater either. Cold showers ftw.

No kitchen (although given how much awesome amazing street food and restaurants there were, I didn't mind.)

No furniture. I ate on a folding metal table and slept on an air mattress, both of which I bought myself.

The friend would visit from time to time, since he had a girlfriend in Beijing (he normally lived in Hong Kong as an antiques dealer.) Sometimes he'd be gracious and take her and I out for dinner. She was drop-dead gorgeous, a graduate from the Communication University of China (中国传媒大学), and an anchorlady for BTV. It was sometimes wierd to see her face on a jumbotron screen, but I got used to it.

Anyhow, they don't really figure in this story. The only reason I mention all this is because the apartment was why I tended to stay in the office or out with Sylvia until late at night. This is how I met my boss's wife.

I directly reported to two associate VPs. One of them, we'll call Lee, the other, Wang. Lee was 29, had a PhD from the LSE, and had worked for three years in a London bulge bracket before coming to the bank where I worked at. Wang was a bit more homegrown. He had a masters from another UK school, and had spent time working on the Beijing 2008 Olympics committee before coming to the bank. Wang was popular in the bank and knew how to grease the right wheels to get things done. Lee, on the other hand, was a bit of an academic. Both had fathers who worked for the Party Organization Bureau. Both were really smart, and taught me tons about China, albeit in different ways.

Lee had a three-year old niece. Once, he took me to go visit her. She lived with Lee's aunt. Lee and I would sometimes spend late nights in the office watching the Premier League together. One such night, he got a phone call from building security.

"Be right back," he said. He appeared five minutes later, dressed in a track suit instead of his normal work attire, and with a fake goatee and an LA Lakers cap. I did a double take. "My... niece is sick. Have to go take care of her." Then, as he was getting close to the door, he turned around and added in a forced-casual departure from his normally academic tone. "There might be a woman that will come up here looking for me. Well... there will be one. I told security to let her up in ten minutes. When she comes here, don't tell her where I've gone or who I'm with. Got it, buddy?"

I nodded. It was nine thirty and I could afford to stick around for awhile before the subway stopped. Lee disappeared through the set of doors leading to the freight elevator. I should have left.

Around ten minutes later, the woman showed up, along with her parents. I first heard them down the hall: a trio of loud, hysterical voices, growing in volume. My white-collar survival instincts kicked in: I plugged in my headphones, turned on some Metallica, hunkered down in my cubicle, and pretended not to hear anything.

My cube was directly across from Lee's cube. They showed up to his cubicle and began screaming. "Where is that fuckhead," etc. When, through reflection on my laptop screen, I saw the woman pick up one of the deal toys (a glass skycraper) and begin jabbing it into a stack of papers on Lee's desk, I stood up, turned around and coughed.

They turned around. The woman looked at me with a hateful glare. "Who are you?," she exclaimed.

I asked her the same thing.

Turns out the three were Lee's wife and in-laws. Apparently Lee had gotten married to a fellow grad student in the UK; then their marriage came undone. Lee had been getting a divorce from her for a while now.

I shrugged on the inside but extended a look of sympathy. She went on. Apparently they had a kid, a daughter, three years ago. They were fighting a custody battle over her.

I froze. They must have sensed it, because her father immediately began peppering me with questions. Had Lee brought her up, he said. Where was he, he said. I shook my head and said no and I don't know so many times I lost count.

Eventually they got frustrated and left.

In the meanwhile, I should have mentioned what happened the Sunday that Banker Girl met me for our weekly course.

The lesson started off surprisingly normal. Then, midway through, she started talking about her ex-boyfriend and current boyfriend again, this time in English. And I was blown away, because I could have closed my eyes and she would have sounded exactly like a native speaker. Her grammar was clear, her diction spot-on, even her pronounciation was better.

Never one to pass up a teachable moment, I let her finish and told her that she had just done really well. Her face lit up. She said that maybe we should talk about these topics in the future instead of the Atlantic. I agreed. Then she gave me an envelope with my weekly payment. She joked that if I could make her happier, she would give me even more money.

Always polite, I refrained from peeking inside until I was out of the building. She'd given me a thousand RMB, double what she should have given.

I spent dinner with Sylvia thinking of what to do. Sylvia was the sweet, innocent type, so she thought I was just a little ill. That night, as I walked her back to her parents' home by Muxidi, I had an idea.



Part 4, First Date

http://www.teamliquid.net/blogs/viewblog.php?id=367794

***
Что?
BigFan
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
TLADT24920 Posts
September 10 2012 06:41 GMT
#2
Rising action, climax incoming lol. Thanks again!
Former BW EiC"Watch Bakemonogatari or I will kill you." -Toad, April 18th, 2017
JieXian
Profile Blog Joined August 2008
Malaysia4677 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-09-10 07:16:24
September 10 2012 07:13 GMT
#3
YOU PUT THAT PART RIGHT AT THE END DAMN YOU

:D

Ok so how do you say fuckhead (etc.) in Beijing? The whole lot.


....

My life is so boring

I like these kind of stories more than some fiction because it says something about how people are, and in different parts of the world too.

You better not be a lying muthafuka
Please send me a PM of any song you like that I most probably never heard of! I am looking for people to chat about writing and producing music | https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=noD-bsOcxuU |
Xiahou
Profile Blog Joined June 2011
Singapore80 Posts
September 10 2012 07:29 GMT
#4
On September 10 2012 16:13 JieXian wrote:
YOU PUT THAT PART RIGHT AT THE END DAMN YOU

:D

Ok so how do you say fuckhead (etc.) in Beijing? The whole lot.


....

My life is so boring

I like these kind of stories more than some fiction because it says something about how people are, and in different parts of the world too.

You better not be a lying muthafuka


In Beijing, any undesirable person you meet on the street is known as a 傻逼.
JieXian
Profile Blog Joined August 2008
Malaysia4677 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-09-10 07:37:34
September 10 2012 07:36 GMT
#5
On September 10 2012 16:29 Xiahou wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 10 2012 16:13 JieXian wrote:
YOU PUT THAT PART RIGHT AT THE END DAMN YOU

:D

Ok so how do you say fuckhead (etc.) in Beijing? The whole lot.


....

My life is so boring

I like these kind of stories more than some fiction because it says something about how people are, and in different parts of the world too.

You better not be a lying muthafuka


In Beijing, any undesirable person you meet on the street is known as a 傻逼.


sb sounds more like idiot than fuckhead right? I was looking for fuckhead, because you know, that guy allegedly stone their daughter away. There's got to be a wider range of vocab than just sb.
Please send me a PM of any song you like that I most probably never heard of! I am looking for people to chat about writing and producing music | https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=noD-bsOcxuU |
Xiahou
Profile Blog Joined June 2011
Singapore80 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-09-10 07:47:39
September 10 2012 07:46 GMT
#6
On September 10 2012 16:29 Xiahou wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 10 2012 16:13 JieXian wrote:
+ Show Spoiler +
YOU PUT THAT PART RIGHT AT THE END DAMN YOU

:D

Ok so how do you say fuckhead (etc.) in Beijing? The whole lot.


....

My life is so boring

I like these kind of stories more than some fiction because it says something about how people are, and in different parts of the world too.

You better not be a lying muthafuka


In Beijing, any undesirable person you meet on the street is known as a 傻逼.
[/spoiler]

sb sounds more like idiot than fuckhead right? I was looking for fuckhead, because you know, that guy allegedly stone their daughter away. There's got to be a wider range of vocab than just sb.[/QUOTE]

Well, it is the Chinese equivalent of 'fucking cunt' so....
BigFan
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
TLADT24920 Posts
September 10 2012 07:51 GMT
#7
On September 10 2012 16:13 JieXian wrote:
YOU PUT THAT PART RIGHT AT THE END DAMN YOU

:D

Ok so how do you say fuckhead (etc.) in Beijing? The whole lot.


....

My life is so boring

I like these kind of stories more than some fiction because it says something about how people are, and in different parts of the world too.

You better not be a lying muthafuka

^ LOL well even if it ends up that he's lying(I don't think he is), it's still a better story than most XD
Former BW EiC"Watch Bakemonogatari or I will kill you." -Toad, April 18th, 2017
JieXian
Profile Blog Joined August 2008
Malaysia4677 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-09-10 08:02:43
September 10 2012 08:02 GMT
#8
On September 10 2012 16:46 Xiahou wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 10 2012 16:29 Xiahou wrote:
On September 10 2012 16:13 JieXian wrote:
+ Show Spoiler +
YOU PUT THAT PART RIGHT AT THE END DAMN YOU

:D

Ok so how do you say fuckhead (etc.) in Beijing? The whole lot.


....

My life is so boring

I like these kind of stories more than some fiction because it says something about how people are, and in different parts of the world too.

You better not be a lying muthafuka


In Beijing, any undesirable person you meet on the street is known as a 傻逼.


sb sounds more like idiot than fuckhead right? I was looking for fuckhead, because you know, that guy allegedly stone their daughter away. There's got to be a wider range of vocab than just sb.
[/spoiler]

Well, it is the Chinese equivalent of 'fucking cunt' so....
[/QUOTE]

lol ok got this from hudong wiki that's why I asked

"傻逼”一词就是不懂事,犯傻的家伙。


On September 10 2012 04:17 Shady Sands wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 10 2012 04:10 EtherealDeath wrote:
Oh god what the hell you tease part 20 now. First world blog problems...

This is a long ass story bro. I still haven't gotten to the part where she was threatening to commit suicide yet


don't spoil your own stories man!

sb

:D
Please send me a PM of any song you like that I most probably never heard of! I am looking for people to chat about writing and producing music | https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=noD-bsOcxuU |
lungo
Profile Joined October 2005
Denmark276 Posts
September 10 2012 10:24 GMT
#9
keep em coming! its nice reading
as Arnold said: you have been erased! but dont worry!
EtherealDeath
Profile Blog Joined July 2007
United States8366 Posts
September 10 2012 11:58 GMT
#10
AHAHAHEAIUWRHWHIUHUCH cliffhangers fuuuuuuuuuuuuu. This is literary blog torture I say.
TheKwas
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
Iceland372 Posts
September 10 2012 12:56 GMT
#11
When does the book hit shelves?
vGl-CoW
Profile Blog Joined December 2002
Belgium8305 Posts
September 10 2012 13:16 GMT
#12
good stuff, eagerly awaiting future installments!
Moderatorfollow me on twitter if u think ur so tough @BooyaCow
Jaaaaasper
Profile Blog Joined April 2012
United States10225 Posts
September 10 2012 14:24 GMT
#13
Good blog, can't wait for the next one.
Hey do you want to hear a joke? Chinese production value. | I thought he had a aegis- Ayesee | When did 7ing mad last have a good game, 2012?
Topin
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
Peru10128 Posts
September 10 2012 14:43 GMT
#14
better than Naruto
i would define my style between a mix of ByuN, Maru and MKP
docvoc
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
United States5491 Posts
September 10 2012 14:46 GMT
#15
these are really great SS, much better than the attempt to kill people thing you tried . I really enjoyed this blog.
User was warned for too many mimes.
EtherealDeath
Profile Blog Joined July 2007
United States8366 Posts
September 10 2012 18:58 GMT
#16
F5'ing still don't see part 4 universe must be bugged or maybe I'm lagging?

On September 10 2012 23:43 Topin wrote:
better than Naruto

I am going to punt a raccoon if this becomes weekly.
SneakyAZN
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
United States200 Posts
September 10 2012 20:08 GMT
#17
Great blog!! The cliffhangers fuuuuuuuu...... refreshing Tl blogs too much for my own good
Shady Sands
Profile Blog Joined June 2012
United States4021 Posts
September 10 2012 23:25 GMT
#18
This is what they said -- 混账, 人渣, 畜生, 混蛋
Что?
Loanshark
Profile Blog Joined December 2008
China3094 Posts
September 10 2012 23:37 GMT
#19
On September 11 2012 08:25 Shady Sands wrote:
This is what they said -- 混账, 人渣, 畜生, 混蛋


Could have been a lot worse imo.
No dough, no go. And no mercy.
Shady Sands
Profile Blog Joined June 2012
United States4021 Posts
September 10 2012 23:40 GMT
#20
On September 11 2012 08:37 Loanshark wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 11 2012 08:25 Shady Sands wrote:
This is what they said -- 混账, 人渣, 畜生, 混蛋


Could have been a lot worse imo.

Like what? I actually know more canto profanity than mandarin profanity, since mandarin is what i spoke with my last three exes while canto is what i spoke over the poker table in college
Что?
Aerisky
Profile Blog Joined May 2012
United States12129 Posts
September 11 2012 00:59 GMT
#21
Another interesting read. You're really churning them out (and it's much appreciated ).

Nobody ever knew you could be such a great poster hehe.
Jim while Johnny had had had had had had had; had had had had the better effect on the teacher.
JieXian
Profile Blog Joined August 2008
Malaysia4677 Posts
September 11 2012 09:43 GMT
#22
On September 11 2012 08:40 Shady Sands wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 11 2012 08:37 Loanshark wrote:
On September 11 2012 08:25 Shady Sands wrote:
This is what they said -- 混账, 人渣, 畜生, 混蛋


Could have been a lot worse imo.

Like what? I actually know more canto profanity than mandarin profanity, since mandarin is what i spoke with my last three exes while canto is what i spoke over the poker table in college


I'll take cursing in Cantonese over Mandarin anyday :D

So much more powerful
Please send me a PM of any song you like that I most probably never heard of! I am looking for people to chat about writing and producing music | https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=noD-bsOcxuU |
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