Public Profile for Jaaaaasper

vGl-CoW: cow dick is HUGE
[08:39am] vGl-CoW: or i like to think it is
[08:39am] vGl-CoW: my attic houses a lego town built for the sole purpose of making my dick look rly rly big
[08:39am] vGl-CoW: godzilla big
[08:40am] marttorn: Ah
[08:40am] vGl-CoW: knock over a church tower
[08:40am] vGl-CoW: makes me feel like a big man
[08:40am] marttorn: It's kind of like I make sure all my friends are midgets




CyDe: I meant to say _I_ was the cheap whore
[2:42pm] CyDe: because of all my positions
[2:42pm] DivinO: HA
[2:42pm] DivinO: HA
[2:42pm] DivinO: HA


CyDe|AFK: pay no heed
[3:42pm] CyDe|AFK: they lie
[3:42pm] CyDe|AFK: it's all a fabricated story
[3:42pm] Jaaaaasper: also a good cow qoute
[3:42pm] CyDe|AFK: so that they can fist me
[3:42pm] CyDe|AFK: I know your ways
[3:42pm] CyDe|AFK: I do
[3:42pm] CyDe|AFK: I've seen
[3:42pm] CyDe|AFK: AND I CANNOT UNSEE
[3:42pm] Jaaaaasper: dude we can pay you for the fisting
[3:42pm] DivinO: Cyde
[3:42pm] DivinO: geez
[3:42pm] CyDe|AFK: ...that which is seen
[3:42pm] Jaaaaasper: $5 dollar man whore
[3:42pm] CyDe|AFK: yeah?
[3:43pm] DivinO: um
[3:43pm] DivinO: don't you think
[3:43pm] DivinO: you're advertising a little much?
[3:43pm] CyDe|AFK: no such thing as too much exposure
[3:43pm] CyDe|AFK: fuck that double entendre
[3:43pm] DivinO: ..........
[3:43pm] CyDe|AFK: that's not what I meant
[3:43pm] Jaaaaasper: lol
[3:43pm] DivinO: um.
[3:43pm] RedJustice: i'll make you a cregslist posting
[3:43pm] Jaaaaasper: you're just making it worse
[3:43pm] CyDe|AFK: ...
[3:44pm] DivinO: cyde when i see you
[3:44pm] • CyDe|AFK closes his legs tightly.
[3:44pm] DivinO: you better not be like
[3:44pm] DivinO: in a thog
[3:44pm] DivinO: thong*
[3:44pm] Jaaaaasper: he fucked up his luandry
[3:44pm] CyDe|AFK: yeah I better be wearing nothing, RITE?
[3:44pm] Jaaaaasper: he has purple thongs naow
[3:44pm] DivinO: you know there are kids at the zoo
[3:44pm] CyDe|AFK: how the hell did you know
[3:44pm] DivinO: that's really not appropriate attire
[3:44pm] Jaaaaasper: wat you are meating him riirl?
[3:44pm] CyDe|AFK: for someone who is away from my keyboard, I am typing an awful lot
[3:44pm] Jaaaaasper: meeting*
[3:44pm] RedJustice: divino no dildos
[3:45pm] CyDe|AFK: actually can I get a free dildo?
[3:45pm] Jaaaaasper: red wants in with teh strap on
[3:45pm] CyDe|AFK: ...as a gift.
[3:45pm] Jaaaaasper: ask flamewheel
[3:45pm] DivinO: CyDe if you're not kidding
[3:45pm] Jaaaaasper: he has a lot
[3:45pm] CyDe|AFK: as in, I would be giving it as a gift.
[3:45pm] Jaaaaasper: im usre
[3:45pm] DivinO: CyDe how serious are you.
[3:45pm] DivinO: Because I'm honestly not sure.
[3:45pm] CyDe|AFK: how legal is it?
[3:45pm] DivinO: Dildos are fucking legal.
[3:45pm] RedJustice: is one of your female friends reading 50 shades of grey
[3:45pm] RedJustice: cause that would make sense
[3:46pm] RedJustice: EVEN IF YOU ARE 16 IT IS STILL LEGALS
[3:46pm] CyDe|AFK: yeah, but I am sixteen
[3:46pm] RedJustice: for you to have it
[3:46pm] Jaaaaasper: still legal
[3:46pm] CyDe|AFK: and you are some other age
[3:46pm] DivinO: we're 40
[3:46pm] DivinO: let's say
[3:46pm] DivinO: red and i
[3:46pm] Jaaaaasper: its still lega
[3:46pm] CyDe|AFK: dude I'd like a dildo
[3:46pm] CyDe|AFK: that'd be sick!
[3:46pm] Jaaaaasper: just as long as they dont use it on you
[3:46pm] CyDe|AFK: I'd hit my friends with it
[3:46pm] CyDe|AFK: that's waht I do
[3:46pm] RedJustice: LOL
[3:46pm] CyDe|AFK: I swaer
[3:46pm] Jaaaaasper: surrrrreeee
[3:46pm] CyDe|AFK: HEY FUCK YOU PAL
[3:46pm] DivinO: Cyde is this serious.
[3:46pm] DivinO: Because
[3:46pm] DivinO: If you're serious
[3:47pm] DivinO: I can get you one. Free. By Saturday.
[3:47pm] CyDe|AFK: I don't need no dildo
[3:47pm] CyDe|AFK: I got tons of guys coming after me trying to fist me
[3:47pm] CyDe|AFK: OMG
[3:47pm] CyDe|AFK: DUDE
[3:47pm] Jaaaaasper: lol
[3:47pm] CyDe|AFK: I would
[3:47pm] RedJustice: he wants your fist
[3:47pm] ProbeT1 is now known as probe1.
[3:47pm] DivinO: I've sold toys to people before.
[3:47pm] Jaaaaasper: so much funny right now
[3:47pm] DivinO: This isn't weird for me.
[3:47pm] RedJustice: hi probe
[3:47pm] Jaaaaasper: ello probe
[3:47pm] DivinO: And I'm asking you completely seriously, CyDe.
[3:47pm] DivinO: Would you like a dildo?
[3:47pm] CyDe|AFK: how much would a good cheap face whacking didlo cost?
[3:47pm] CyDe|AFK: dildo*
[3:47pm] probe1: i'll pass.
[3:47pm] RedJustice: someone screenshot that
[3:47pm] DivinO: Hi probe, good time to join the conversation.
[3:47pm] Jaaaaasper: should we inform Kiett of this awesome ness
[3:47pm] DivinO: How big are we talking?
[3:47pm] RedJustice: he said free
[3:48pm] CyDe|AFK: hmm
[3:48pm] DivinO: I can't get you a big one free, those are expensive. ;;
CyDe|AFK: aw
[3:48pm] DivinO: I can do up to 18 inches
[3:48pm] CyDe|AFK: ...........
[3:48pm] RedJustice: lawl
[3:48pm] CyDe|AFK: HOLY FUCK
[3:48pm] CyDe|AFK: HOLY LEAPING SQUIRMING SHIT
[3:48pm] CyDe|AFK: uh
[3:48pm] DivinO: It's double-ended
[3:48pm] CyDe|AFK: that's a "small" one?
[3:48pm] DivinO: no that's the biggest one we carry.
[3:48pm] CyDe|AFK: heh
[3:48pm] CyDe|AFK: okay
[3:48pm] DivinO: it's also the dueling dildo of choice
[3:48pm] CyDe|AFK: I feel a little better now
[3:48pm] CyDe|AFK: haha
[3:48pm] CyDe|AFK: okay what's a good starter size
[3:49pm] CyDe|AFK: DON'T SAY ANYTHING
DivinO: Now is this vaginal or anal?
[3:49pm] Jaaaaasper: this is all in my profile
[3:49pm] Jaaaaasper: btw
[3:49pm] CyDe|AFK: uh
[3:49pm] CyDe|AFK: which is cheaper
[3:49pm] CyDe|AFK: I am not particularly informed in the whole dildo derpartment
[3:49pm] DivinO: Do you want the 18 inch?
[3:49pm] DivinO: We have a 12 inch
[3:50pm] Jaaaaasper: cyde wants teh anal dildo
[3:50pm] DivinO: Both double ended
[3:50pm] CyDe|AFK: I think I will have difficulty hiding an 18 inch dildo
[3:50pm] DivinO: and jelly
[3:50pm] DivinO: So 12 inch?
[3:50pm] Jaaaaasper: he lacks the indoor plumbing
[3:50pm] DivinO: Yes, most girls have trouble hiding an 18 inch dildo
[3:50pm] CyDe|AFK: sure 12 inch sounds great
[3:50pm] CyDe|AFK: fuck you jaaaaasper
[3:50pm] DivinO: um.
[3:50pm] Jaaaaasper: cyde is a strat dude btw
[3:50pm] DivinO: This could be odd but.
[3:50pm] Jaaaaasper: strait*
[3:50pm] RedJustice: lol
[3:50pm] DivinO: We have them in purple nad red.
[3:50pm] DivinO: and*
[3:50pm] RedJustice:
[3:50pm] Jaaaaasper: purple to go with his thongs
[3:50pm] DivinO: and they come in .... veiny and smooth
[3:50pm] RedJustice: WHAT COLORS DO YOU LIKE CYDE
[3:51pm] CyDe|AFK: PURPLE PURPLE PURPLE GOGOGOGOGOG
[3:51pm] DivinO: veiny or smooth.
[3:51pm] CyDe|AFK: oh fuck
[3:51pm] CyDe|AFK: OH FUCK
[3:51pm] CyDe|AFK: uh
[3:51pm] CyDe|AFK: veiny

[22:21] <supernovamaniac> im staying at my aunt's house
[22:21] <OpticalShot> aup anm
[22:21] <OpticalShot> sup
[22:21] <OpticalShot> wait
[22:21] <OpticalShot> were u at
[22:21] <supernovamaniac> was sleeping and i just wanted to fart
[22:21] <supernovamaniac> so i farted
[22:21] <supernovamaniac> and soemthing came out along with the fart
[22:21] <supernovamaniac> fucking shit
[22:21] <OpticalShot> LOL
[22:21] <jpak> hahahahaha
[22:21] <marttorn> wtf
[22:21] <supernovamaniac> how the fuck do i clean this up
[22:21] <supernovamaniac> fucking brown sheets
[22:21] <supernovamaniac> FUCKING BROWN SHEETS

<+vGl-CoW> this conversation is forever on my hard dick (im tattooing everything

<+vGl-CoW> it looks like i have a rly gross dick disease when im flaccid but then i get hard and you see it's an IRC log

[03:30] <Archas> If that happens, you wouldn't know anyway
[03:31] <marttorn> That is unless I fuck you in the ass until you tell me
[03:31] <Archas> I'm sure you can make it in.
[03:31] <Archas> Might take a little bit
[03:31] <marttorn> Ahhahahaha
[03:31] <Archas> WOW
[03:31] <Archas> FUCKING
[03:31] <Archas> REALLY

[01:40] <Divin0> Damn it, now I'm a necrophiliac

Uranus isn't just gassy, it's also tilted completely sideways, such that instead of rotating like a spinning top, it rolls around ... like a giant ball. ...think they know how this happened, and it means that Uranus has been pounded really, really hard not once, but twice.

Archas: No
Archas: Fuck the goat

aerisky: well she can femensit on my dick

<Azera> feels like getting anal
<Azera> yeah my dad showed me

[22:12] <Shock710> why is it so small O_o



[23:51] <dravernor> hi fuse
[23:52] <@fusefuse> yo
[23:52] <dravernor> plz unban serejai
[23:52] <@fusefuse> he is banned because he doesnt have + anymore
[23:52] <dravernor> brian bought him more
[23:52] <dravernor> i think
[23:52] <+brian_4v6> fuck you dave
[23:52] <@fusefuse> i didnt ban him
[23:52] <+brian_4v6> i asked you to do it for a reason
[23:52] <+brian_4v6>
[23:52] <dravernor> oh
[23:52] <@fusefuse> set by tanktank
[23:52] * dravernor takes off clothes
[23:52] <dravernor> like that?
[23:52] <+jaaaaasper> damnit do we have to let him back?
[23:52] <@fusefuse> not sure why im even here
[23:52] <+jaaaaasper> I geuss we do
[23:53] <@fusefuse> fuking brian
[23:53] <+jaaaaasper> rofl dravs
[23:53] <@fusefuse> did u actually
[23:53] <@fusefuse> did u actually
[23:53] <+jaaaaasper> what a sloot


[17:45] <Erasme> who want
[17:45] <Erasme> s
[17:45] <Erasme> to 1v1 dota loser get banned 4months

[17:47] <harodihg> Erasme I will play
[17:47] <Targe> whats your tl account
[17:47] <harodihg> harodihg

[17:50] <harodihg> I make game, password liquid
[17:50] <harodihg> We play erasme?

[17:52] <jaaaaasper> Erasme you have a taker
[17:52] <jaaaaasper> go get wrecked
[17:52] <Erasme> im on cs huehue
[17:52] <Erasme> u missed the train
[17:52] <jaaaaasper> rofl




[15:24] <Targe> wtf is wrong with my vagina?
[15:24] <Targe> why does it fucking meander