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Jewish culture question

Blogs > Shady Sands
Post a Reply
Shady Sands
Profile Blog Joined June 2012
United States4021 Posts
September 09 2012 09:37 GMT
#1
I just got invited to a Bar Mitzvah, but I've had minimal interaction with Jewish culture. All my friends who are Jewish also are getting invited to the event and/or hosting it, so I'd rather not embarass myself by asking them directly. Anything I should/shouldn't do... also should I buy gifts or not?

Thanks.

*
Что?
sob3k
Profile Blog Joined August 2009
United States7572 Posts
September 09 2012 09:46 GMT
#2
Its pretty much just a party so you don't have to really worry about it, you just have to sit around with everyone else for the ceremonial stuff, but its not complicated.

Gifts are pretty standard but dont have to be anything big, depending on how casually you were invited and how connected you are to the guy.

Have fun, its just a party, should be great food too.
In Hungry Hungry Hippos there are no such constraints—one can constantly attempt to collect marbles with one’s hippo, limited only by one’s hippo-levering capabilities.
Gloomzy
Profile Joined June 2011
Australia42 Posts
September 09 2012 11:00 GMT
#3
Bar Mitzvahs! Are you going to the service or just the party?

Money is an acceptable gift (doesn't have to much, depends on how well you know him).

If you're going to the service make sure you have a Yarmulke (or see if the Synagogue provides, they usually do).
Enjoy the food, it's always great.
Shady Sands
Profile Blog Joined June 2012
United States4021 Posts
September 09 2012 11:31 GMT
#4
On September 09 2012 20:00 Gloomzy wrote:
Bar Mitzvahs! Are you going to the service or just the party?

Money is an acceptable gift (doesn't have to much, depends on how well you know him).

If you're going to the service make sure you have a Yarmulke (or see if the Synagogue provides, they usually do).
Enjoy the food, it's always great.

Er, if I'm Chinese should I just go to the party?
Что?
ShadeR
Profile Blog Joined December 2009
Australia7535 Posts
September 09 2012 12:16 GMT
#5
Jews love the Chinese. Go to both.
Shady Sands
Profile Blog Joined June 2012
United States4021 Posts
September 09 2012 12:21 GMT
#6
On September 09 2012 21:16 ShadeR wrote:
Jews love the Chinese. Go to both.

I think the feeling is mutual. Yep, if my flight back doesn't get delayed I'll probably go to both. Prepped out a couple hundred bucks for a cash gift.
Что?
StarStruck
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
25339 Posts
September 09 2012 14:30 GMT
#7
On September 09 2012 18:37 Shady Sands wrote:
I just got invited to a Bar Mitzvah, but I've had minimal interaction with Jewish culture. All my friends who are Jewish also are getting invited to the event and/or hosting it, so I'd rather not embarass myself by asking them directly. Anything I should/shouldn't do... also should I buy gifts or not?

Thanks.


Yes you are supposed to bring a gift. They get showered with gifts. I live in a very Jewish dominated area. When I was young there would be 1-2 Bar/Bat Mitzvah's for me to go too. X_x
thurst0n
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
United States611 Posts
September 09 2012 18:24 GMT
#8
Things I think you should know:
I am Jewish.
I had a bar-mitzvah.
This means that your friend is becoming a man in the eyes of the Jewish Culture.
Chai = Life in Hebrew. Hebrew numbering is based on the alphabet, so this corresponds to the #18. If you give a monetary gift it should be in some multiple of 18, which represents good luck and life!
It's a celebration, so have fun, but be respectful if you go the service portion.
There should be wine and alcohol, try to get your hands on it and drink it.
They are going to lift people up on the chairs, don't be scared.

P.S. I'm nub. If you'd like you can follow me @xthurst but its not worth it ill be honest
sam!zdat
Profile Blog Joined October 2010
United States5559 Posts
September 09 2012 19:16 GMT
#9
Just show up. You can go to the service if you want to, but it's a bit annoying because all the jewish kids who have to go to a billion of these will be super disrespectful and talk through the whole thing (in my experience). If you've never gone to one it's worth going to (if it's orthodox don't go, it will be super long and all in hebrew).

The party is just a party, with awkward dancing and fried mozzarella sticks.
shikata ga nai
farvacola
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
United States18869 Posts
September 09 2012 19:19 GMT
#10
On September 10 2012 04:16 sam!zdat wrote:
Just show up. You can go to the service if you want to, but it's a bit annoying because all the jewish kids who have to go to a billion of these will be super disrespectful and talk through the whole thing (in my experience). If you've never gone to one it's worth going to (if it's orthodox don't go, it will be super long and all in hebrew).

The party is just a party, with awkward dancing and fried mozzarella sticks.

I'd say go even if it is orthodox, which is highly unlikely in any case. I find the hebrew language to be absolutely fascinating and beautiful to listen to. And definitely don't worry about any sorts of expectations in terms of what is required of you as a guest, every Jewish gathering I've been to has been very warm and friendly.
"when the Dead Kennedys found out they had skinhead fans, they literally wrote a song titled 'Nazi Punks Fuck Off'"
marttorn
Profile Blog Joined May 2011
Norway5211 Posts
September 09 2012 19:23 GMT
#11
I was once at a bar mitzvah, hosted at one of the two Synagogues in Norway (I was invited by my Jewish cousin). She only had two pieces of advice to offer me before the ceremony and following celebrations:

"Don't take off any clothes and don't sing songs about Jesus"
memes are a dish best served dank
Shady Sands
Profile Blog Joined June 2012
United States4021 Posts
September 09 2012 19:24 GMT
#12
On September 10 2012 04:23 marttorn wrote:
I was once at a bar mitzvah, hosted at one of the two Synagogues in Norway (I was invited by my Jewish cousin). She only had two pieces of advice to offer me before the ceremony and following celebrations:

"Don't take off any clothes and don't sing songs about Jesus"

Haha, nice. Thanks for the advice everyone.
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