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Belgium8305 Posts
BEEEEEEEP.
I'm jolted awake from a dreamless slumber by the sudden, sharp noise. I open my eyes to locate the source of the sound in the dark, messy room. It's coming from the nightstand, about three feet away.
You have... one... new message.
I briefly close my eyes again and groan. This had better be worth my time. I am a man who is extremely fond of his sleep. Wearily, I prop myself up and sit on the side of the bed, hunched over and sighing as I glance at the clock. 6:58 AM. Way too early for a nocturnal creature like myself.
My rude awakening was caused by the wrist device I got years ago, when they first made me a Moderator. It's a slightly clunky looking thing, dyed in the same light-blue-and-gray color scheme that is a common sight throughout the city. We're not supposed to ever take it off, but I found it extremely uncomfortable in bed, and like I said, I am extremely fond of my sleep. The lock had needed only some minor tinkering to make it very simple to detach and reattach the device at my leisure.
This, by the way, is typical of my life as a Moderator: I tend to shirk my duties at will, often not intervening in disputes out of sheer apathy or laziness. I haven't even solved a third of the cases that George Marshal has, and I've been here much longer than he has. He's the most active member on the moderation team by a long shot. I would strongly suspect him to be one of Rich's robotic creations if I hadn't seen him use the bathroom every once in a while. Programmed to make the rest of us feel guilty for slacking off, or something. Who knows what goes on in that deranged computer wizard's head.
I fasten the device to my wrist, look at the screen and press the little “new!” icon that had always made me a little giddy in my younger years, but that I had now come to dread as a harbinger of unpleasant queries and tasks.
Sender: TL.net Bot
I sigh again. Sent by the bot. This means that the message came from the Admins themselves. The head honchos. They rarely bother me. What do they want? I lower my gaze to the subject line.
Subject: Your presence is required at TL HQ. ASAP
No further text. How intriguing. The only time I'd ever been summoned there by myself was when I thought it would be funny to decorate the MLP crew's hangout spot with pictures of dead and sickly ponies. I got a stern talking to, but it was worth it. The memory still makes me smile.
Had I done anything wrong in recent memory? Not that I could remember. Then again, my memories often are a little fuzzy, on account of all the grass I smoke.
My eyes dart over to the little ornamented ebony box I keep my weed in, and immediately I feel the temptation rise. Perhaps I should have a little smoke? Like they say, it gives you a whole new way of looking at the day... No, the Admins would probably notice, and I might already be in trouble. This would just be adding fuel to the fire. Save that shit for later.
As I shift my body to reach the pile of clothes on the far end of the bed, I notice a sore spot right under my tailbone. I get up and strain my neck to get a good look at my backside in the mirror. There's a boil right above my ass. Great. This day is off to a very promising start.
I grab a quick shower, shave and put on my clothes. I'll get some food on the way to TL HQ. I put on my trench coat, grab my bogart hat with the little horse logo on the front and I'm good to go. I step out of my apartment building and into the gloomy streets of TL.
– TO BE CONTINUED –
 
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WHOA THIS IS COOL
Reading on my phone.
Btdubs if it's too early for you to wake at seven and you value your sleep, you're a diurnal creature. Just picking those nits. Cool to see you delivered though >:D
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Bout time, but steak on two legs always delivers. Awesome start, the boil makes it your own.
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Blazinghand
United States25557 Posts
This is everything I ever wanted and more. Nothing quite as ominous as a message from the TL.net bot
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Lol this is awesome, but doesnt nocturnal mean youre active during the night?
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Oh cow, you tease~
More please :D
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United States22154 Posts
On August 23 2012 04:07 vGl-CoW wrote:
No further text. How intriguing. The only time I'd ever been summoned there by myself was when I thought it would be funny to decorate the MLP crew's hangout spot with pictures of dead and sickly ponies. I got a stern talking to, but it was worth it. The memory still makes me smile.
So it *was* you!
Defiler!
Also part 2 please.
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On August 23 2012 05:55 solidbebe wrote:
Lol this is awesome, but doesnt nocturnal mean youre active during the night?
'Xcept if sleep is his most active occupation 
/Waiting for part 2
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ahah this is so cool :D
I haven't even solved a third of the cases that George Marshal has, and I've been here much longer than he has.
to be fair this guy is the Philip Marlowe of TL, nobody solves more cases than him
Can't wait for the next part !
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Belgium8305 Posts
On August 23 2012 06:52 ArcticRaven wrote:Show nested quote +On August 23 2012 05:55 solidbebe wrote:
Lol this is awesome, but doesnt nocturnal mean youre active during the night? 'Xcept if sleep is his most active occupation /Waiting for part 2
7 AM is daytime by my standards, so I should be sleeping!
What I meant by nocturnal is that I go to bed really late and thus had only been asleep for two hours max when I was woken up. It made sense in my head, but it looks like I worded it poorly. Oh well.
edit: Thanks for the comments by the way, everybody!
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Oooh, seems like intresting start to a book that i never want to put down till i'm done with it.
p.s vGI-CoW is a very handsome fellow  i stalked him in the TL-staff pics :D
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Lol shock
Handsomest mod I think would go to sirjolt. Just unfair :x
This blog needs more love hehe, so good
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Off topic:
I love the word Noir.
BSBD Noir + Violet. Such a cool album title.
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Sounds like the start of a very interesting detective novel. Go go!
Also ---> streets of TL = Grid.
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nocturnal made perfect sense. I'm excited. Is this a fiction or are you either drawing from some(another?) slap on the wrists or also perchance literally coming to new york?
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Hot_Bid running for President?
Nazgul buying out Facebook and Lockheed Martin in his first step to world domination?
SirJolt receiving every Nobel Prize this year?
The first real Iron Man suit has been constructed and EvilTeletubby will become the protector of the USA?
Rekrul is Batman?
Oh the possibilities are endless.
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This was awesome, I'm looking forward to the next installment!
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i await the next, eagerly.
and where has sir jolt been O_o
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United States10328 Posts
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Wait what?! HE was the one writing that? haha wooow nice.
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How is tl's number one poster not a featured blogger?
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ALLEYCAT BLUES50600 Posts
cow is cowing again I see.
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Belgium8305 Posts
On August 23 2012 11:05 Gene wrote:
nocturnal made perfect sense. I'm excited. Is this a fiction or are you either drawing from some(another?) slap on the wrists or also perchance literally coming to new york?
It's fiction, with a few autobiographical elements here and there. The slap on the wrist is fictional, the boil above my ass is not.
Not coming to NY  , although I will some day!
To everyone else, again, thanks for the kind comments. Much appreciated. I'll probably write part two today.
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=D
Awesome, looking forward to part two.
Actually I'm a little disappointed at no mention of "fart" or "shit", but you did mention your ass so I guess the quota was met for this part.
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EPT
