|
lawwwll never thought I'd write one of these but here goes...
It's more for my own benefit but hopefully theres some lessons that you guys can get from it. I just need to talk/write about it.
So theres this girl I've been interested in for a couple of months - let's call her Felicity Basically I've just been casually inviting her to stuff which she politely turns down. However she hints that she would like to grab a coffee sometime. This is probably a one and a half months ago.
She has exams and I was busy with work so when we were both free again (about 2 weeks later), I ask her out and she happily obliges. She says she needs to confirm but she seemed pretty happy about it. In the end she says she can't make it. She keeps apologizing which I found weird....
We text a few times a week and its generally good. She liberally used smileys (which doesn't mean anything but I liked it)
I then find out some guy is chasing her out of the blue. I see him texting her a bit one night. So I decide to fight this one and just ask her out again. She agrees. So I'm all pumped and glad theres an opportunity to show her a different softer/flirtier side of me. We usually see each other at sport only and I'm too busy being all competitive and stuff. I find it really hard to disengage my "sporting" side on the courts.
So I show up at the venue and she's brought a bunch of friends, including the guy whos chasing her. They seem more than just friends and I'm pretty devastated. I pretend everythings all right, talking to her friends and making everyone laugh but after a while I couldn't put on the act any longer and I turn a bit silent. In the end she runs off with the other guy and I'm heartbroken.
The thing is...she didn't even give me a chance to have a 1-on-1 with her. Obviously telling her this is not smart. Is there anything I should do besides just forget it and move on?
Lessons learnt:
I probably didn't act fast enough and there wasn't enough initial interest, wasn't helped by my lack of skill in group situations.
Things I did good:
Wasn't pushy, confident, initiated well.
|
I feel like you're looking into the situation more than you should have. I don't feel like she actually liked you in the same way you did to her but, you did the right things, and she didn't bite, it's her loss. Just move on
|
lawwwll never thought I'd write one of these but here goes...
I feel like most girl blogs are started that way :p
Sucks that someone ran away with the girl :s but being pushy isn't actually a bad thing (if you mean what I think you do) as your chances of being friendzoned after knowing a girl for a long time increases tenfold if not more.
It doesnt actually sound like she was interested in you to begin with (but didnt wanna hurt you) if she cancelled and made up odd excuses for not wanting to go out with you alone, she might've gotten second thoughts after she obliged likely thing is that one of her friends influenced her on this, or maybe she allready went out the other guy?
Also, fucking felicity man
Just be confident and do what you did and then you shouldnt have too to much trouble finding another
|
What a biiiiiiitch bringing her friends and the dude she wants to bang on what she obviously understood was meant as a date. not cool man, not cool. If I were you I'd tell her to choke on it.
|
@ somnigiggles: in hindsight id have to agree. she is one of those tomboys who finds it easy to make guy friends. i wouldn't think i would be the first to be fooled
@Iplaythings: yea agreed - could have acted faster and pushed past the uncertainty. the second thoughts thing is quite interesting...maybe she already committed to the other guy but was still semi interested in me (at that point in time)
@B.I.G: lawwwwl yea ikr. i can hate her but im not the kinda guy to burn bridges like that
|
should've stayed for 5 minutes and then BOUNCED SON WASTING YOUR TIME
: )
|
On July 15 2012 18:20 paper wrote: should've stayed for 5 minutes and then BOUNCED SON WASTING YOUR TIME
: )
LOL yea my fd offered to call me and do a barney in HIMYM with a fake emergency
i had to see it with my own eyes tho 5 mins would have just left me hanging on her "mixed messages" (which i now know to be not so mixed and a waste of my fucking time)
|
On July 15 2012 17:51 dongfeng wrote: She has exams and I was busy with work so when we were both free again (about 2 weeks later), I ask her out and she happily obliges.
Did you say 'grab a coffee' or did you actually ask her out?
|
On July 15 2012 18:25 sc4k wrote:Show nested quote +On July 15 2012 17:51 dongfeng wrote: She has exams and I was busy with work so when we were both free again (about 2 weeks later), I ask her out and she happily obliges. Did you say 'grab a coffee' or did you actually ask her out?
that time i invited her to my friends acoustic concert
what happened today was the result of a "grab a coffee"
|
Aw shit
Should have bounced ASAP to minimize the pain and suffering and/or let yourself say fuckall etc. Too bad ;; you'll find someone better though yo! Out of curiosity, what's the sport you play?
|
On July 15 2012 18:35 Aerisky wrote:Aw shit Should have bounced ASAP to minimize the pain and suffering and/or let yourself say fuckall etc. Too bad ;; you'll find someone better though yo! Out of curiosity, what's the sport you play?
shit happens badminton lol. do u play?
|
Yeah pretty much. Not enough angst or weakness for a TL girl blog! ;]
I don't play myself unfortunately but I'm a fan of Lin Dan, such a boss.
|
On July 15 2012 18:42 Aerisky wrote: Yeah pretty much. Not enough angst or weakness for a TL girl blog! ;]
I don't play myself unfortunately but I'm a fan of Lin Dan, such a boss.
lol i could wax lyrical about how i thought she was "the one" but i think that would be counterproductive
yea he's my fkn hero. I like Bao Chun Lai too but that guy retired -_-
|
Missed your window, sadly. I know you guys are all Day9 fans and all but all these Felicitys are confusing. Be a bit more creative next time.
|
On July 15 2012 19:07 mizU wrote:Missed your window, sadly. I know you guys are all Day9 fans and all but all these Felicitys are confusing. Be a bit more creative next time.
i realise that if a girl really is interested they will extend the window for you. LOL was it from Day9? It was only because I kept seeing the name in girlblogs that I used it for mine ^^
|
I would've just been all like fuck this shit, raise my arm in the air and walk off. Go home and eat popcorn, with my tears being the salty flavor.
|
Northern Ireland22203 Posts
"Fucking Felicity man" was the Day9 response
|
Girls who bring their friends to dates are a total waste of time. Don't even make up excuses like the emergency thing imo. While hilarious for you and your friend, it's not really helping you. Next time she will just bring her friends again since you didn't say anything about it. When this happens to me I just tell the girl I wanted to spend time with her,not with her friends. Then tell her that her I'm going to another bar and she's welcome to join me, but I'm not going to spend my evening here with people I don't know. It's not like anything is going to happen if her friends are around anyways, and by leaving you're the confident guy she can't get. Just walk away. If she likes you, she will either venue change with you, or go after you later on. If she doesn't like you it's over, but then there was nothing to lose in the first place. Just be a bit of an asshole, being nice and hanging with her friends gets you nowhere.
|
instinctively i didn't even think of the possibility to just bail which was rather -_-
yea i think thats what i should have done ArcaneFrost - ah well next time
|
What i've learnt about girls these past years is that being nice doesn't get you anywhere with them.
|
|
|
|