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United States24701 Posts
You're a comedian. You host five 45-minute comedy shows each weekday. The audience varies in size from approximately 20-30 people. Each of your shows needs to have a different routine, and you can't repeat a routine within a one-year period.
During the show, every member of the audience must be engrossed in your performance. If even one person isn't paying attention, or isn't enjoying your show, you are failing them as their comedian. You must perform your show in order to meet the varying needs and sense of humor of each member of the audience. If anyone in your audience is deaf you should set up closed captions for them. If anyone is blind, you may need to describe the motions you make with your hands or props you use during the performance.
You sometimes do 90 minute performances instead of 45. Your total minutes performed for the day still adds up to 225, but now you have to keep the audience's attention for twice as long. Once again, every member of the audience must be fully engrossed for the entirety of the 90 minutes. The irony is that many of the people in the audience don't want to be there and don't like comedy. Some of them even have a tendency to have conversations while you perform or smash the furniture into the floor, distracting everyone. Be careful about having them get kicked out though... it's an obvious tell that you aren't an effective comedian.
The comedy club owners sit in on your performances about 8 times per year. For these 8 sessions you must change up your routine significantly in order to passify them. This usually is detrimental to the quality of your performance from the perspective of your audience (you are much better at running a comedy show than the owners are), but it's not within your power to do much about it. They expect you to have evidence that each person in the audience understood each joke. At the end of the show they write up an evaluation where they note one or two things they noticed that they thought were good and about ten that were bad and need to be fixed.
The microphone is often broken too.
For some, this may be too big a challenge. You, however, must be successful. After all, you're a comedian.
 
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I am confused but intrigued.
edit: after reading the comment below, I understand. I come from a family of teachers. You have my respect.
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Much respect to teachers everywhere. Shit pay, bad hours, a lot of work- all for one of the most important jobs on Earth.
Cheers.
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that is one of the longest riddles i've ever seen. Extremely well written, funny and concise..... this is definately one of the best posts i've ever seen on TL ;p
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... but it's not a riddle.
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On December 07 2011 12:39 Probe1 wrote:
Much respect to teachers everywhere. Shit pay, bad hours, a lot of work- all for one of the most important jobs on Earth.
Cheers.
I feel like an idiot 'cause I couldn't figure it out right away, even though I've heard the exact same kind of ranting from my mother for YEARS, being a teacher.
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I should really stop skim reading apparently.
Teaching is rough.
Teaching Phys Ed is even harder.
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Damn. I live in Ohio too-- I helped pass Issue 2 (which repealed Senate bill 5-- which took away collective bargaining from teachers). So many props for teachers. So many.
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How were we supposed to know that by comedian you mean teacher? I am honestly curious how you reached that conclusion, Probe1.
EDIT: Hey wait a second. Why haven't you made a 10,000th post, Probe1?
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ROFL at people missing the point.
Teachers are bad ass. It is rather amusing that the only real perk they get is extended time away from teaching. Certainly tells you something about the profession 
On a separate note, I think my sig is somewhat appropriate for this blog.
"We're actors - we're the opposite of people" - Rosancrantz and Guildenstern are Dead
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Pretty cool metaphor
(Bonus points for anyone clicking this because of watchmen)
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Maybe it's different in the US but I've yet to see a teacher who held themselves or others to those standards.
OTOH, impossible standards are a great excuse to treat good and poor teachers the same way. After all both of them failed and we knew we were asking something impossible in the first place.
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Yeah, anyone who becomes a teacher must really love it or be blissfully ignorant of the life they are entering.
Either way, I guess I have to respect them. That's mad dedication.
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And you can get never get fired because you're part of the teac... comedian's union
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On December 07 2011 13:12 hypercube wrote:
Maybe it's different in the US but I've yet to see a teacher who held themselves or others to those standards.
OTOH, impossible standards are a great excuse to treat good and poor teachers the same way. After all both of them failed and we knew we were asking something impossible in the first place.
Isn't that why teachers get into teaching  To educate kids. Unfortunately to do that in the current environment you have to put up with what Micro has listed and get shit all pay or respect for it. Failure is a relative thing, a teacher who repeats themselves is less of a failure than one who doesn't bother to pitch.
To me the point of this is not that the standards are impossible but that the support for teachers is non-existent. Swing for the fences and all that. Nothing wrong with high expectations but when there is no respect or support for achieving those standards, why bother?
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On December 07 2011 13:16 Gatsbi wrote:
And you can get never get fired because you're part of the teac... comedian's union
I'm not sure if you're honestly implying that teachers shouldn't have unions with the shit they have to go through.
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On December 07 2011 13:21 Fruscainte wrote:Show nested quote +On December 07 2011 13:16 Gatsbi wrote:
And you can get never get fired because you're part of the teac... comedian's union I'm not sure if you're honestly implying that teachers shouldn't have unions with the shit they have to go through.
With a name like Gatsbi you can bet on it...
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Australia8532 Posts
Q_Q more jeez!
Just jokes yo! Great write up - pretty smart of your Mr Micronesia!
What are the parts of your job that your enjoy? Why do you keep doing it?
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Please don't act like it's hard to be a teacher. Plus, you get summers off.
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On December 07 2011 13:21 Fruscainte wrote:Show nested quote +On December 07 2011 13:16 Gatsbi wrote:
And you can get never get fired because you're part of the teac... comedian's union I'm not sure if you're honestly implying that teachers shouldn't have unions with the shit they have to go through.
I appreciate good teachers, I really do. I even had a few in high school, but there's shitty teachers who have held their jobs for YEARS for no reason other than that it's next to impossible to fire a teacher with their unions. In my opinion, it's a large part (but not the only reason) of why the USA's education system is shit.
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kushm4sta,
Good teachers are incredibly hard to find.
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On December 07 2011 13:23 bkrow wrote:
Q_Q more jeez!
Just jokes yo! Great write up - pretty smart of your Mr Micronesia!
What are the parts of your job that your enjoy? Why do you keep doing it?
Curious as well 
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Kau
Canada3500 Posts
On December 07 2011 13:01 AnachronisticAnarchy wrote:
How were we supposed to know that by comedian you mean teacher? I am honestly curious how you reached that conclusion, Probe1.
EDIT: Hey wait a second. Why haven't you made a 10,000th post, Probe1?
Looks like someone's comedian failed them. Didn't you ever hear that language arts joke about metaphors?
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A nice little conceit you have going there. I really enjoyed the build up, but was really expecting it to turn into an Edger Allen Poe ending.
I don't think I could be a teacher, maybe a college professor, but not a teacher. I love a challenge, but I don't think I could teach someone something they aren't willing to learn.
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On December 07 2011 13:25 kushm4sta wrote:
Please don't act like it's hard to be a teacher. Plus, you get summers off.
In keeping with internet tradition: Let us hate on each other for no apparent raisin.
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On December 07 2011 13:25 kushm4sta wrote:
Please don't act like it's hard to be a teacher. Plus, you get summers off.
if he was in Canada I would be inclined to agree but he isn't.
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I can understand why micronesia used the "ruse" of the "Comedian" to get us here.
Have you seen anyone been interested in going to a Teaching Club for fun?
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On December 07 2011 13:01 AnachronisticAnarchy wrote:
How were we supposed to know that by comedian you mean teacher? I am honestly curious how you reached that conclusion, Probe1.
EDIT: Hey wait a second. Why haven't you made a 10,000th post, Probe1?
Count my next GSL related article contribution bonanaza as my 10k post if you want
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United States24701 Posts
On December 07 2011 13:16 Gatsbi wrote:
And you can get never get fired because you're part of the teac... comedian's union
Even if this were true, it wouldn't really be a counter to the OP.
On December 07 2011 13:23 bkrow wrote:
What are the parts of your job that your enjoy? Why do you keep doing it?
I find working with students can often be enjoyable, and when students learn it is often very rewarding. Also, once you become a teacher it's difficult to career change XD If it isn't working out for you your only decent way out that doesn't involve starting over educationally is to become an administrator.
On December 07 2011 13:25 kushm4sta wrote:
Please don't act like it's hard to be a teacher. Plus, you get summers off.
I always wonder how random people I don't know come to conclusions likes "it's not hard to be a teacher."
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I actually find nothing else in life as rewarding as knowing you've had an impact on another persons life. Sex, meh that's nice. Violence? Sure feels good to hurt someone lol.
But knowing that you were even part of what changed another persons life, no matter how little, is one of the greatest feelings you can have when you're laying in bed at night trying to get to sleep. Like I said, it's a shit job but what you're doing is more important than 90% of what's on TV.
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Brilliantly written, i was getting suspicious when you said you would only have 30 audience members.
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A good teacher is really hard to find. Anyone can stand up in front of a group of kids and read off a textbook or syllabus, but only a few can really inspire those to go out and learn on their own. It's tough, but I'm glad someone like you is doing it!
Good teachers have an amazing amount of selflessness imo.
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Tons and tons of respect to teaching as an occupation, must be very difficult.
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You forgot to add someone else writes 90% of your comedy routine and that routine is based on a distilled blend of the finest comedy created throughout the ages. That takes some of the edge off your analogy.
Being a good teacher is hard, no argument there. So is being good at a million other jobs, so I'm not sure what you're getting at. Teachers have a tremendous responsibility to shape the next generation. We should value them because what they do is important, whether or not it's hard.
If it were easy to be a good teacher, would that make the profession any less valuable?
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On December 08 2011 20:54 Doctorasul wrote:
You forgot to add someone else writes 90% of your comedy routine and that routine is based on a distilled blend of the finest comedy created throughout the ages. That takes some of the edge off your analogy.
Being a good teacher is hard, no argument there. So is being good at a million other jobs, so I'm not sure what you're getting at. Teachers have a tremendous responsibility to shape the next generation. We should value them because what they do is important, whether or not it's hard.
If it were easy to be a good teacher, would that make the profession any less valuable?
You forget that in a lot of other careers being good means you go up the ladder and get pay raises. Teachers have a low pay ceiling (at least in the United States) and very little incentive to actually become good. There are plenty of teachers who are fine with being mediocre. Then they get their tenure and really don't give a shit, and it shows. That is what makes good teachers extremely undervalued individuals.
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United States24701 Posts
On December 08 2011 20:54 Doctorasul wrote:
You forgot to add someone else writes 90% of your comedy routine and that routine is based on a distilled blend of the finest comedy created throughout the ages. That takes some of the edge off your analogy. I don't think it's that I forgot so much as I don't agree with the statement.
Being a good teacher is hard, no argument there. So is being good at a million other jobs, so I'm not sure what you're getting at. Yeah, I feel like you didn't really get it. It's fairly subtle though I have to admit. Teachers have a tremendous responsibility to shape the next generation. We should value them because what they do is important, whether or not it's hard.
If it were easy to be a good teacher, would that make the profession any less valuable?
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United States22154 Posts
On December 07 2011 13:45 Probe1 wrote:
Let us hate on each other for no apparent raisin.
What a fruity statement. Can I love you for no apparent grape?
:-P
That said this is a very nicely written blog, I enjoyed it ^_^
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Out of curiosity, what courses do you teach? I know you teach Physics, but any others?
Also out of curiosity, do you ever get bored of the material you're teaching? I've often thought that if I were to teach High School I wouldn't find the material engaging, and for lack of a better term too "low level". It sounds bad, but I wouldn't want to teach something that was so simple.
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Back in the days, (in DK) Students had to learn, teachers had to teach.
Now, teachers have to teach students that feel like they don't need to learn..
I miss when it was more whip than carrot.
Also, great blog, I really get your point.
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On December 09 2011 01:53 micronesia wrote:Show nested quote +On December 08 2011 20:54 Doctorasul wrote:
You forgot to add someone else writes 90% of your comedy routine and that routine is based on a distilled blend of the finest comedy created throughout the ages. That takes some of the edge off your analogy. I don't think it's that I forgot so much as I don't agree with the statement.
Fair enough, since you're actually in the field and I'm not. Making the material convincing could be the hard part so I'l back off from that point.
Show nested quote +Being a good teacher is hard, no argument there. So is being good at a million other jobs, so I'm not sure what you're getting at. Yeah, I feel like you didn't really get it. It's fairly subtle though I have to admit.
Sarcasm doesn't go across easily on the internet but I'd like to know what I'm missing. I thought the point was that it's a difficult, creative job and that's fine, but is that what makes teaching special or is it its' importance for the future?
Teachers have a tremendous responsibility to shape the next generation. We should value them because what they do is important, whether or not it's hard.
If it were easy to be a good teacher, would that make the profession any less valuable?
Any reaction to the last question?
Anyhow, thanks for the entry and sorry if I was too harsh/rude. Your patience is appreciated! 
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United States24701 Posts
On December 09 2011 02:04 emperorchampion wrote:
Out of curiosity, what courses do you teach? I know you teach Physics, but any others?
I'm certified to teach physics. I've taught regular physics, AP Physics B/C (C only as a student teacher though), general physics, 7th grade science research, oceanography, marine biology, nutrition. I'm assuming you are only talking about k-12 education; I taught a bit in college as an undergrad <3
Also out of curiosity, do you ever get bored of the material you're teaching? I've often thought that if I were to teach High School I wouldn't find the material engaging, and for lack of a better term too "low level". It sounds bad, but I wouldn't want to teach something that was so simple. I enjoy teaching AP level more than Regents, in part because of this. However, I have yet to have a serious problem with losing motivation due to the material being repeated. Even if I was having that type of a problem, it would be at the bottom of a list of 500 more major problems.
On December 09 2011 05:23 Doctorasul wrote:Show nested quote +On December 09 2011 01:53 micronesia wrote:On December 08 2011 20:54 Doctorasul wrote:
You forgot to add someone else writes 90% of your comedy routine and that routine is based on a distilled blend of the finest comedy created throughout the ages. That takes some of the edge off your analogy. I don't think it's that I forgot so much as I don't agree with the statement. Fair enough, since you're actually in the field and I'm not. Making the material convincing could be the hard part so I'l back off from that point.
I could go into a whole rant about the topic but it's not the point of the blog so I'll avoid doing so XD
Show nested quote +Being a good teacher is hard, no argument there. So is being good at a million other jobs, so I'm not sure what you're getting at. Yeah, I feel like you didn't really get it. It's fairly subtle though I have to admit. Sarcasm doesn't go across easily on the internet but I'd like to know what I'm missing. I thought the point was that it's a difficult, creative job and that's fine, but is that what makes teaching special or is it its' importance for the future?
I wasn't being sarcastic or anything... the OP actually is rather subtle. I try not to explain my subtleties on TL because a lot of people give me crap for it, but to sum it up really quickly, when you take some of the things that you are faced with in teaching and apply them to other types of careers/jobs, they sound absolutely ridiculous... but because it's teaching it's considered the norm.
Show nested quote + Teachers have a tremendous responsibility to shape the next generation. We should value them because what they do is important, whether or not it's hard.
If it were easy to be a good teacher, would that make the profession any less valuable? Any reaction to the last question?
As I said, the point of this discussion in particular isn't really about how hard it is to be a teacher, but to humor your question a bit, the value of a teacher is best represented by what they accomplish, so we are probably in agreement more or less on this point.
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How many MS3 owner does it take to screw in a light bulb?
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EPT
