This is a therapeutic blog for myself so I feel better. So move on if you don't care.
I've been going through a rough time in my life emotionally and one of the few things i still enjoy in day to day life is laddering. While I've slowly been feeling better after getting a little bit of help today is shit.
I woke up early and was feeling alright. I decided to play some Day of Defeat Source and was getting strange fps drops and choppy gameplay. I decided to take a break as I know im having heat issue on my computer but can't quite afford another one.
I go and watch white ra do some awesome ultra ultra fast expoing and this puts me in the mood to ladder. So I hope on ladder and play a game and I continue to get the same choppy performance I was experiencing before but was able to win a long macro game against a Master Zerg player (I'm diamond so it feels nice to play masters players).
The next two games are also against Masters, one protoss one terran. The issue is that my laptop shut down 5 seconds into the game with the protoss. I take a break reset my computer and try again only to have my laptop shut down 8 minutes into a game against a Terran who I had scouted as doing a 1-1-1.
My opening as protoss was solid, my expo was up I started cutting probes and making zealot immortal without a supply block and as the raven pops out of the starport i move my obs away and it shuts down again.
Im very frustrated right now. One i need to get this thing fixed (heatsinks cleaned, thermal paste replaced -- thank god I have a service plan at best buy so its free). I won't be able to ladder for 2 weeks if I can't find a computer in the meantime or a laptop to carry on my visa temporarily. I don't want to do it but ill need to.
I can't go 2 weeks without ladder. I've worked too hard and too long to let my chance of playing masters level players slip away. This is the first time since I went on a 2 week trip in august ive played 3 masters players in a row. Last time I lost to a masters players I was playing straight diamonds for 4 days. Two days ago I was 6 wins 1 loss which gave me this opportunity. I know my MMR won't change in 2 weeks if I don't play but my comfort level and confidence as well as current skill will diminish enough to make it hard to play masters players again.
Not only that but laddering is one of the few joys I have atm and I don't want to let it go. I can't let this one happy enjoyable and motivated activity slip away before I get better.
There I feel better. Read if you want if you don't I don't care. Its a bit of a rant but like I said its a self therapy measure atm. Off the the bestbuy canada website to find a potential replacement for Visa to worry about for 2 weeks.