• Log InLog In
  • Register
Liquid`
Team Liquid Liquipedia
EST 12:02
CET 18:02
KST 02:02
  • Home
  • Forum
  • Calendar
  • Streams
  • Liquipedia
  • Features
  • Store
  • EPT
  • TL+
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Smash
  • Heroes
  • Counter-Strike
  • Overwatch
  • Liquibet
  • Fantasy StarCraft
  • TLPD
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Blogs
Forum Sidebar
Events/Features
News
Featured News
[ASL22] Finals Preview: Sweet Victory!12[ASL22] Ro4 Preview: Mirror Mirror6[ASL22] Ro8 Preview: Within Reach5[ASL22] Ro8 Preview: In A Tizzy11[ASL22] Ro16 Preview: Holy Diver5
Community News
Dark completes military service, returns to SC29[BSL23] RO16 Group Stage19Weekly Cups (Nov 2-8): herO back on top?2Weekly Cups (Oct 26 - Nov 1): MaxPax, herO, Solar win0Weekly Cups (October 19-25): Clem triples first in 5.0.175
StarCraft 2
General
Dark completes military service, returns to SC2 Greetings.. No more SC2 streamers on team liquid? Serral's getting trashed by New Catsle's Mind Weekly Cups (Nov 2-8): herO back on top?
Tourneys
Sea Duckling Open (Global, Bronze-Diamond) Dark returns! GSL CK #7 4v4 Team Battle (Nov 19) soO & FanTaSy return! SC2 Kevin Scrim 4v4 (Nov 16) RSL goes to London! 2026 Offline Finals Nov 21-22 Tasteless Time Warp: SC Evo Showmatch (May 25)
Strategy
[H] ZvP Mid-Late Game: Stalkers Collossi HT
Custom Maps
[G] How to playtest arcade maps Starcraft 2 Advance [D] the control group Simple Questions/Answers
External Content
The PondCast: SC2 News & Results Mutation # 551 Robotic Revival Mutation # 550 Graveyard Shift Mutation # 549 Endless Sparkles
Brood War
General
List of top players active on ShieldBattery BW General Discussion Recommended BW Settings for Mouse and Video Starcraft:Brood War Discord Servers [BSL23] RO16 Group Stage
Tourneys
[$1250] International ShieldBattery League Bisu's Team vs Shuttle's Team 2026-11-14 2v2v2v2 Tournament Stage 1: Community Poll [BSL23] Ro16 Group C - Sunday 21:00 CET
Strategy
Pluto's TvP 5Marine 2Medic Push Simple Questions, Simple Answers Infested Terran strategies in 2026 Nuke strategy worked in K-League 2026-11-09
Other Games
General Games
Stormgate/Frost Giant Megathread Nintendo Switch Thread Free Space RTS Game, optimised f. Phone/Tablet etc List of Game Threads The PlayStation 5
Dota 2
League of Legends
[TL LoL EUW IHs] Teemo shall perish
Heroes of the Storm
Heroes of the Storm 2.0
Hearthstone
Deck construction bug
TL Mafia
TL Mafia Community Thread
Community
General
US Politics Mega-thread Artificial Intelligence Thread Trading/Investing Thread European Politico-economics QA Mega-thread Russo-Ukrainian War Thread
Fan Clubs
Fan Club Resource Thread Reynor Fan Club The Flash Fan Club
Media & Entertainment
Movie Discussion! Anime Discussion Thread [Manga] One Piece
Sports
TeamLiquid Health and Fitness Initiative For 2023 Football (Soccer) Thread MLB/Baseball 2023
World Cup 2022
Tech Support
Computer Build, Upgrade & Buying Resource Thread
TL Community
The Automated Ban List Recent Gifted Posts
Blogs
The time I organised my…
AssyrianKing
Why I built Repalyzer (1.1.…
BlueStar
Innovate or Game Over?
TrAiDoS
ShieldBattery on Mac
Kraekkling
Can Bots Beat Pros?? Starcr…
namkraft
Customize Sidebar...

Website Feedback

Closed Threads



Active: 12204 users

my biggest dream. my greatest failure. - Page 4

Blogs > Sp1der
Post a Reply
Prev 1 2 3 4 All
Sp1der
Profile Joined August 2011
United States96 Posts
March 14 2012 16:30 GMT
#61
On March 15 2012 01:10 Demicore wrote:
Don't give up sir; you're still young. If you give up now you will wonder if you could have made it for the rest of your life -eternal regret. If you go for it and fail at least you can move on to something else without regret.



ya this is too true ^^ im giving it my best shot! thank you for the kind words my friend!
"If I don't sweat again today, I will be crying tears tomorrow"
Sp1der
Profile Joined August 2011
United States96 Posts
March 14 2012 22:42 GMT
#62
back from physical therapy. got some really great stretches for my median nerve which is really really tight around the bicep and upper forearm.
"If I don't sweat again today, I will be crying tears tomorrow"
Eee
Profile Joined August 2011
Sweden2712 Posts
March 14 2012 23:49 GMT
#63
Good luck
Very inspiring post!
Pongo
Profile Joined November 2010
Australia79 Posts
March 15 2012 00:48 GMT
#64
tl;dr: There's things you can do at a psychological level to help reduce tension during 'big' game moments.

You sound like Kerrigan describes Raynor in BW - tenacious. It sounds like you're on a good path. Keep working with your Docs and trusting your instincts.

It's such a sh!t to hear Americans talk about health care and cost, almost all of the things you're getting are free or subsidised for Aussies, such a bummer.

I'm not a psychologist but am on my way. After life forced a detour, I'm finishing my honours, so I've got a couple of years left before I hang the shingle. I've been fortunate (or unfortunate depending on how you look at it) enough to have had a reasonable amount of exposure to our hospital and medical system and know a few folk going through similar issues to yourself. That said any advice I give is confined to my personal experience or drawn from my studies as opposed to that of a practicing shrink. I know that sounds legalised, but I'd get my ass kicked if I somehow gave the impression that I'm a shrink.

So to finally answer your question, first up it may be worth consulting a sports psychologist as opposed to a clinical or counselling psych (I'm not sure on registrations or classifications in the US, but that's what we call them here). It may be something you discuss with your current mental health physician.

So sports psychs work specifically with maximising performance in competitive environments. They develop the certain skills to help someone kick that goal more often, help them grind through the last leg of a marathon etc etc... For you I'd imagine there are two things you'd be focusing on (and I'm guessing you've already touched on them with your docs):

1. The psychological effect of dealing with your condition, it is in effect a disability and

2. Game stuff, be it game day or training.

At a guess (remembering my qualifying statement above... :-p) I would say the tension you're feeling comes from two places:

1. You're required to increase your repetitive movements when battle starts, that is APM goes up, so the raft of issues you get with RSI are going to be super evident here, what that means for you, I don't know. And

2. I suspect you're having what they call a 'fight or flight' response. It's the kind of thing that happens when you see a snake or someone pulls a knife on you. Your pulse increases, your breathing changes, your muscles tighten. You make a decision 'do I run (flight)?' or 'do I stand my ground (fight)?' Flight and fight have their own physiological responses that come with them.

A fight response is designed to get you through a threatening situation by gearing your body physically towards survival (theory wise its built of the back of that survival of the fittest Darwinian stuff). Off the top of my head, a fight response results in endorphins being released, digestion slowing etc etc...

This response is automatic, that is, you don't control it. Think about it, someone jumps out from behind a corner and yells 'boo!' you can't help but nearly sh!t yourself. However, I think you may well be able to train yourself to react differently. Using the same example, if this person jumped out from the same place everytime, you would probably get used to it (exposure therapy). Maybe your heart skips a beat, but maybe you don't get the shakes and take five minutes to calm down.

I would suggest that this theory would apply to the tension you feel in those big moments in a game. So, how do you condition for it?

. Firstly, consult your psych, remember I'm not a psych. Nonetheless here are some things that might help (they may also hinder as you don't want to be too relaxed or worsen your RSU, which is why it's important you take your psychs advice not mine).

. Controlled breathing techniques may help reduce the stress reaction your having. This may work psychologically and physically

. Exposure therapy (a bit like they do with phobias) may help desensitise you to these moments in game. We have a star forward here who practices his goal kicking whilst his i-pod plays the sound of a crowd cheering a booing, same concept.

. Hypnotherapy may help too. I'm not talking the type done with a fob watch. Real hypnotherapy is something that you train yourself into with lots of practice. You could develop a trigger word you say to yourself that reduces muscular tension. I've known of people who have conditioned themselves to orgasm on command in order to get an endorphin rush during a game, it was part of a controlled study, mind out of the gutter people.

So there are some thoughts. As you can see they're all quite different, but all focused on reducing a reaction you presently can't control. There's probably more you can do but I've waffled on long enough. I hope some of this helps. GLHF
Sp1der
Profile Joined August 2011
United States96 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-03-15 15:48:28
March 15 2012 02:13 GMT
#65
@pongo- fantastic advice! that actually makes alot of sense as i noticed my hearbeat increases with my muscle tension in big moments. for example, if im at base macroing and i send my units through the mini-map only to realize banelings rolling on creep and i have to split stim asap..things like that force a tensed reaction from me physcially and emotionally. i feel part of it comes from my competitiveness as well. im so hard on myself. thank you for the advice pongo, i will do my best to apply your advice. i really get encouraged from posts like the one you made. i will do my best to recover, train hard, and pursue a career as a pro gamer. i want to honor god and glorify god through my efforts as i am a christian. i cannot do this without the lord and my injury has humbled me in many ways.
"If I don't sweat again today, I will be crying tears tomorrow"
Pongo
Profile Joined November 2010
Australia79 Posts
March 15 2012 07:05 GMT
#66
You're welcome Sp1der, I hope things work out. Just remember, discuss any changes you're thinking of making with your physicians. You don't want to do more harm than good. Best of luck.
Sp1der
Profile Joined August 2011
United States96 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-03-16 03:01:29
March 15 2012 15:45 GMT
#67
ya for sure i will try and do everything through the professionals
"If I don't sweat again today, I will be crying tears tomorrow"
Sp1der
Profile Joined August 2011
United States96 Posts
March 16 2012 02:59 GMT
#68
hey everyone, i will be creating a video for the razer academy. any ideas/suggestions? pm me if u have some good ideas

thanks
"If I don't sweat again today, I will be crying tears tomorrow"
Sp1der
Profile Joined August 2011
United States96 Posts
March 17 2012 17:11 GMT
#69
update: i got in contact with the author of the book "its not carpell tunnel syndrome". she is actually a therapist in PA and she agreed to do a session evaluation with me over skype to help pinpoint the issue. im hoping she can give me some valuable advice. ill keep you guys posted. oh ya, yesterday was my bday! i got some money sent to me from relatives all over the place which is really going to help me pay for therapy. really blessed for that!
"If I don't sweat again today, I will be crying tears tomorrow"
THE_DOMINATOR
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
United States309 Posts
March 17 2012 18:22 GMT
#70
Fuck that be realistic. You should never put all your eggs in one basket.
DOMINATION
Sp1der
Profile Joined August 2011
United States96 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-03-18 18:52:25
March 18 2012 18:44 GMT
#71
On March 18 2012 03:22 THE_DOMINATOR wrote:
Fuck that be realistic. You should never put all your eggs in one basket.


In 207 BC, General Xiang advanced the small Chu army towards Julu to wage war against the huge Qin army. After crossing the river, he had his troops burn the ships and destroy all but 3 days of supplies, which successfully eliminated any chance of retreat.

Since the Chu army of 30,000 was about to fight the Qin Army of 300,000, you might think Xiang was crazy. However, the results tell a different story. Xiang’s army won nine consecutive battles, and then opposing Qin army surrendered.

What happened here? The theory is, since the Chu army had no other option, they had to win and their fighting demonstrated it. In other words, they put all their eggs in one basket and watched that basket.
"If I don't sweat again today, I will be crying tears tomorrow"
Sp1der
Profile Joined August 2011
United States96 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-03-20 21:47:48
March 20 2012 21:47 GMT
#72
hey guys! just finished a 1 hour consultation session with a therapist in PA over skype video haha. she specializes in rsi. i have so many notes taken its ridiculous and i also have a new stretching program! will follow this to my absolute best ability!
"If I don't sweat again today, I will be crying tears tomorrow"
Sp1der
Profile Joined August 2011
United States96 Posts
March 23 2012 01:39 GMT
#73
mom went to bible study and a lady suggested i see some natural doctor. he wants to change/control my diet for a couple months and see how it improves my body. hes also doing some other tests, hopefully hes on to something!
"If I don't sweat again today, I will be crying tears tomorrow"
mynameisgreat11
Profile Joined February 2012
599 Posts
March 25 2012 01:17 GMT
#74
I was a musician for several years and had to quit b/c of rsi and other related issues. I know several other musicians who had the same thing happen to them. For most people with RSI and carpal, the problem will never go away. Things like stretching, therapy, and surgery can mitigate symptoms to some degree, but will almost never fix it.

I admire your dedication. You should be smart and apply it somewhere else.
Sp1der
Profile Joined August 2011
United States96 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-03-25 01:32:44
March 25 2012 01:32 GMT
#75
On March 25 2012 10:17 mynameisgreat11 wrote:
I was a musician for several years and had to quit b/c of rsi and other related issues. I know several other musicians who had the same thing happen to them. For most people with RSI and carpal, the problem will never go away. Things like stretching, therapy, and surgery can mitigate symptoms to some degree, but will almost never fix it.

I admire your dedication. You should be smart and apply it somewhere else.



It’s how we are in our minds that make us how we are in our bodies. i will no longer look at this the wrong way. it is something that has happened. yes, its unfortunate. yes, i wish i could go back in time. but It had to happen, otherwise I would never have woken up. It couldn't have been any other way and if i cant overcome this then i don't deserve to be the champion i have set out to become.
"If I don't sweat again today, I will be crying tears tomorrow"
mynameisgreat11
Profile Joined February 2012
599 Posts
March 25 2012 01:54 GMT
#76
On March 25 2012 10:32 Sp1der wrote:
Show nested quote +
On March 25 2012 10:17 mynameisgreat11 wrote:
I was a musician for several years and had to quit b/c of rsi and other related issues. I know several other musicians who had the same thing happen to them. For most people with RSI and carpal, the problem will never go away. Things like stretching, therapy, and surgery can mitigate symptoms to some degree, but will almost never fix it.

I admire your dedication. You should be smart and apply it somewhere else.



It’s how we are in our minds that make us how we are in our bodies. i will no longer look at this the wrong way. it is something that has happened. yes, its unfortunate. yes, i wish i could go back in time. but It had to happen, otherwise I would never have woken up. It couldn't have been any other way and if i cant overcome this then i don't deserve to be the champion i have set out to become.


It is not in our minds that makes us how we are in our bodies. Reality and what you dream are different. Dreams don't always come true. You can maximize happiness if you are realistic.
Sp1der
Profile Joined August 2011
United States96 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-03-25 02:31:18
March 25 2012 02:14 GMT
#77
On March 25 2012 10:54 mynameisgreat11 wrote:
Show nested quote +
On March 25 2012 10:32 Sp1der wrote:
On March 25 2012 10:17 mynameisgreat11 wrote:
I was a musician for several years and had to quit b/c of rsi and other related issues. I know several other musicians who had the same thing happen to them. For most people with RSI and carpal, the problem will never go away. Things like stretching, therapy, and surgery can mitigate symptoms to some degree, but will almost never fix it.

I admire your dedication. You should be smart and apply it somewhere else.



It’s how we are in our minds that make us how we are in our bodies. i will no longer look at this the wrong way. it is something that has happened. yes, its unfortunate. yes, i wish i could go back in time. but It had to happen, otherwise I would never have woken up. It couldn't have been any other way and if i cant overcome this then i don't deserve to be the champion i have set out to become.


It is not in our minds that makes us how we are in our bodies. Reality and what you dream are different. Dreams don't always come true. You can maximize happiness if you are realistic.



i don't want to be "realistic" just yet. i dont want to look back on my life 10 years from now and say "man, i wonder what would have happened if i gave it my all". we only live once and i will not throw away my "dream" because of an obstacle in my path. its not like this is something i will strive for in a perpetual state until i die lol. this is something im trying to understand and overcome and just because i don't get results overnight doesn't mean i am not getting closer to my goal. it took Thomas Edison 10,000 failed attempts before he successfully invented the light bulb. what if he gave up at the 9,999th try?


i understand your point clearly. it makes sense and its the wise decision. i don't really want to argue because i cant really win lol...and i know it. its just something i want to do(its hard to explain).
"If I don't sweat again today, I will be crying tears tomorrow"
ScruffyJanitor
Profile Blog Joined November 2011
Australia108 Posts
Last Edited: 2012-03-30 06:49:23
March 30 2012 06:45 GMT
#78
Sigh... as a younging I had the exact same dream about warcraft 3 and I loved the game, I dedicated 8 hours a day for many years and moved schools, when I did that I realised "Why should I stress out about this game? " " Why am I putting all my effort into this game and neglecting everything around me ". You can try go pro but dont burn all your bridges brother. Many pros go pro without dedicating full time.


EDIT: Why not dedicate time to creating a starcraft based show? That way if you got good enough you could still go to events ect and once your hands heal you have a name and (hopefully) an income, that would make it easier for you to achieve your dream if you were set on it.
Sp1der
Profile Joined August 2011
United States96 Posts
March 30 2012 18:06 GMT
#79
On March 30 2012 15:45 ScruffyJanitor wrote:
Sigh... as a younging I had the exact same dream about warcraft 3 and I loved the game, I dedicated 8 hours a day for many years and moved schools, when I did that I realised "Why should I stress out about this game? " " Why am I putting all my effort into this game and neglecting everything around me ". You can try go pro but dont burn all your bridges brother. Many pros go pro without dedicating full time.


EDIT: Why not dedicate time to creating a starcraft based show? That way if you got good enough you could still go to events ect and once your hands heal you have a name and (hopefully) an income, that would make it easier for you to achieve your dream if you were set on it.



mhm pretty darn good point. theres no rush really..im pretty young and sc2 still has a long life ahead of it.
"If I don't sweat again today, I will be crying tears tomorrow"
Sp1der
Profile Joined August 2011
United States96 Posts
March 31 2012 16:39 GMT
#80
increasing massage per week to 4x. (for 2 months b/c finally saved up enough money). ill be going to mlg Anaheim as well!
"If I don't sweat again today, I will be crying tears tomorrow"
Prev 1 2 3 4 All
Please log in or register to reply.
Live Events Refresh
IPSL
02:00
Ro24 Group E
TerrOr vs IJ_Terran
rasowy vs Hazorath
Liquipedia
WardiTV Invitational
21:00
WardiTV Not-Summer Championshi
MaxPax vs Solar
herO vs TBD
Lambo vs TBD
Rogue vs TBD
WardiTV1165
ComeBackTV 1018
IntoTheiNu 807
TaKeTV 429
IndyStarCraft 263
Rex121
Liquipedia
[ Submit Event ]
Live Streams
Refresh
StarCraft 2
IndyStarCraft 263
Rex 118
StarCraft: Brood War
Britney 24226
Calm 4099
Rain 1792
Jaedong 1191
BeSt 808
EffOrt 615
Rush 599
Larva 526
FanTaSy 464
Shuttle 335
[ Show more ]
ZerO 236
Dewaltoss 130
Sharp 104
Mind 91
Hyun 76
Hm[arnc] 29
Terrorterran 25
hero 24
Killer 24
ToSsGirL 22
sorry 21
910 20
Aegong 16
Movie 15
Shine 14
Sacsri 13
Rock 11
ajuk12(nOOB) 11
soO 9
Free 8
Dota 2
qojqva2666
420jenkins140
Counter-Strike
edward92
Heroes of the Storm
Khaldor476
Trikslyr33
MindelVK11
Other Games
FrodaN3994
Beastyqt646
Lowko387
mouzStarbuck295
byalli254
ToD234
syndereN213
KnowMe191
XaKoH 164
ROOTIllusion22
Railgan14
ZerO(Twitch)11
CosmosSc2 9
Organizations
Other Games
EGCTV1049
BasetradeTV128
[ Show 15 non-featured ]
StarCraft 2
• Hinosc 34
• poizon28 32
• AfreecaTV YouTube
• intothetv
• Kozan
• IndyKCrew
• Migwel
StarCraft: Brood War
• ChaeLyn 8
• Pr0nogo 3
• BSLYoutube
• STPLYoutube
• ZZZeroYoutube
Dota 2
• WagamamaTV716
League of Legends
• Jankos2847
Other Games
• Shiphtur248
Upcoming Events
BSL
2h 58m
TerrOr vs OyAji
UltrA vs Gosudark
Sparkling Tuna Cup
16h 58m
WardiTV Invitational
18h 58m
IPSL
23h 58m
Art_Of_Turtle vs KameZerg
Radley vs George
BSL
1d 2h
Artosis vs Dewalt
Ret vs Tech
SOOP
1d 16h
soO vs FanTaSy
WardiTV Weekly
1d 18h
Monday Night Weeklies
2 days
PiGosaur Cup
3 days
The PondCast
3 days
[ Show More ]
GSL
4 days
Replay Cast
5 days
KCM Race Survival
5 days
RSL Revival
6 days
Liquipedia Results

Completed

Proleague 2026-11-12
Blizzard Classic Cup 2026
HCC Season 3

Ongoing

Acropolis #5
KCM Race Survival 2026 Season 4
International ShieldBattery League
Individual League
BSL Season 23
IPSL Winter 2026-27
Calamity Cup Div. A Season 8
Underdog Cup 2026 Div 2-3
BLAST Rivals Fall 2026
IEM Beijing 2026
PGL Masters Bucharest 2026
Stake Ranked Episode 5
1win Private Club #2
Thunderpick World Champ. '26
ESL Pro League Season 24
Stake Ranked Episode 4
1win Private Club #1
Logitech G Play Connect 2026
SL StarSeries Fall 2026
FISSURE Playground #3
BLAST Open Fall 2026

Upcoming

YSL S4
Sector 591
SC4ALL II: Brood War
BSL 23: Non-Korean Championship
HSC XXX
Stellar Fest 2: Lunar Cup
StarCraft2 Weekly Open Tournament 2026 Grand Finals
SC4ALL II: StarCraft II
Kung Fu Cup 2026 Grand Finals
RSL Offline Finals
IEM Kraków 2027
PGL Bucharest 2027
BLAST Bounty Winter 2027
PGL Major Singapore 2026
Stake Ranked Episode 6
TLPD

1. ByuN
2. TY
3. Dark
4. Solar
5. Stats
6. Nerchio
7. sOs
8. soO
9. INnoVation
10. Elazer
1. Rain
2. Flash
3. EffOrt
4. Last
5. Bisu
6. Soulkey
7. Mini
8. Sharp
Sidebar Settings...

Advertising | Privacy Policy | Terms Of Use | Contact Us

Original banner artwork: Jim Warren
The contents of this webpage are copyright © 2026 TLnet. All Rights Reserved.