• Log InLog In
  • Register
Liquid`
Team Liquid Liquipedia
EDT 06:18
CEST 12:18
KST 19:18
  • Home
  • Forum
  • Calendar
  • Streams
  • Liquipedia
  • Features
  • Store
  • EPT
  • TL+
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Smash
  • Heroes
  • Counter-Strike
  • Overwatch
  • Liquibet
  • Fantasy StarCraft
  • TLPD
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Blogs
Forum Sidebar
Events/Features
News
Featured News
[ASL21] Ro24 Preview Pt2: News Flash10[ASL21] Ro24 Preview Pt1: New Chaos0Team Liquid Map Contest #22 - Presented by Monster Energy18ByuL: The Forgotten Master of ZvT30Behind the Blue - Team Liquid History Book20
Community News
Weekly Cups (March 23-29): herO takes triple6Aligulac acquired by REPLAYMAN.com/Stego Research8Weekly Cups (March 16-22): herO doubles, Cure surprises3Blizzard Classic Cup @ BlizzCon 2026 - $100k prize pool51Weekly Cups (March 9-15): herO, Clem, ByuN win4
StarCraft 2
General
Is Adaferin Gel Effective for Pimples Find Out Rongyi Cup S3 - Preview & Info Team Liquid Map Contest #22 - Presented by Monster Energy Blizzard Classic Cup @ BlizzCon 2026 - $100k prize pool What mix of new & old maps do you want in the next ladder pool? (SC2)
Tourneys
https://www.facebook.com/LiverComplexNetherlands.O RSL Season 4 announced for March-April Sparkling Tuna Cup - Weekly Open Tournament StarCraft Evolution League (SC Evo Biweekly) WardiTV Mondays
Strategy
Custom Maps
[M] (2) Frigid Storage Publishing has been re-enabled! [Feb 24th 2026]
External Content
The PondCast: SC2 News & Results Mutation # 520 Moving Fees Mutation # 519 Inner Power Mutation # 518 Radiation Zone
Brood War
General
ASL21 General Discussion so ive been playing broodwar for a week straight. Pros React To: JaeDong vs Queen BSL 22 Map Contest — Submissions OPEN to March 10 Klaucher discontinued / in-game color settings
Tourneys
[Megathread] Daily Proleagues [ASL21] Ro24 Group E [ASL21] Ro24 Group F Azhi's Colosseum - Foreign KCM
Strategy
What's the deal with APM & what's its true value Fighting Spirit mining rates Simple Questions, Simple Answers
Other Games
General Games
Stormgate/Frost Giant Megathread Starcraft Tabletop Miniature Game Nintendo Switch Thread General RTS Discussion Thread Darkest Dungeon
Dota 2
The Story of Wings Gaming Official 'what is Dota anymore' discussion
League of Legends
G2 just beat GenG in First stand
Heroes of the Storm
Simple Questions, Simple Answers Heroes of the Storm 2.0
Hearthstone
Deck construction bug Heroes of StarCraft mini-set
TL Mafia
Mafia Game Mode Feedback/Ideas TL Mafia Community Thread Five o'clock TL Mafia
Community
General
US Politics Mega-thread The Chess Thread Russo-Ukrainian War Thread NASA and the Private Sector Things Aren’t Peaceful in Palestine
Fan Clubs
The IdrA Fan Club
Media & Entertainment
[Manga] One Piece [Req][Books] Good Fantasy/SciFi books Movie Discussion!
Sports
2024 - 2026 Football Thread Formula 1 Discussion Cricket [SPORT] Tokyo Olympics 2021 Thread General nutrition recommendations
World Cup 2022
Tech Support
[G] How to Block Livestream Ads
TL Community
The Automated Ban List
Blogs
Broowar part 2
qwaykee
China Uses Video Games to Sh…
TrAiDoS
Funny Nicknames
LUCKY_NOOB
Iranian anarchists: organize…
XenOsky
FS++
Kraekkling
ASL S21 English Commentary…
namkraft
Electronics
mantequilla
Customize Sidebar...

Website Feedback

Closed Threads



Active: 16112 users

StarCraft Essay turned into my College Class

Blogs > Bacon-X
Post a Reply
1 2 3 4 Next All
Bacon-X
Profile Joined December 2010
United States266 Posts
October 20 2011 04:16 GMT
#1
I just turned in this essay and thought I'd post it here because I wrote an essay about StarCraft cause it's just that awesome.

Sorry if I have any wrong information or something let me know ^_^ ... I rushed this essay cause i had to get it done and i had no time to do it due to working all weekend.

anyways.. here it is!!! I want to see what you guys think. Also it's pretty epic huh, i wrote an essay about StarCraft and turned it in to my English 101 teacher today hahahaha....

StarCraft, the Sport of Tomorrow
Competitive gaming has existed for a long time now, but it has never quite received such tremendous recognition from society. StarCraft has been the national sport of South Korea for many years now, but in North America, it was not as widely known and culturally accepted. Recently, however, in the US and Canada, local bars have transformed their menus and entire bar for national StarCraft events to what they call “BarCraft”. The game of StarCraft is so compelling and exciting that it brings many people together to watch major StarCraft tournaments, such as MLG (Major League Gaming) Orlando. Just like in South Korea, StarCraft is slowly but steadily rising in popularity and recognition within our culture. StarCraft is more than just another videogame, it is a real-time strategy game. StarCraft requires much learning, is highly competitive at the professional level, and generates a large fan base for major tournaments. StarCraft impacts our society by leading the world of eSports.
In StarCraft, there are 3 playable races: the Terran, Protoss, and Zerg. The Terrans are the humans, with units such as marines, tanks, and thors (huge mechanical fighting machines). The Protoss are a technologically advanced and highly religious alien race, with units such as Zealots (warriors with psionic blades), dark templars (permanently cloaked units), and motherships. The Zerg are also an alien race, but they resemble bugs and lack any technology. The basic worker units of the Zerg, are called “Drones”. And they literally morph themselves into structures and buildings. The Zerg resembles bugs in the sense that they are gross, hideous, and are great in number. When a game of starcraft starts, players train more workers to mine minerals to in order to have a higher income. With this income players begin to build structures that allow them to train an army. The players will then use that army to attack and possibly defeat their opponent.
When first starting to play, players may feel overwhelmed with the amount of content they have to learn. For example, all the structures, units, abilities, build orders, strategies, and which units are good against which. This does take time to learn, but once a player is familiar with the basic concepts of the game, they are ready to experience the awesome play of StarCraft. Even at this point, after learning the basics, players are still challenged with the task of trying to counter what their opponent has, which requires them to scout their opponents base. If you dream of playing the game professionally, you must have very quick reaction times and a minimum of 200 APM (Actions Per Minute). This is not a kid’s game at all; this is a competitive electronic sport.
The game of StarCraft is highly competitive at the pro level. In a game so delicate and fragile, a single mistake could lose you the game. Professional StarCraft players make a living off of playing the game. Many professional clans, such as Evil Geniuses, have a huge budget and house their players in a training house. A very popular and respected player Greg Fields, known as “IdrA”, dropped out of college to play StarCraft professionally. StarCraft is a very real eSport. Pro tournaments give out huge money prizes for the winners. Just recently, at the IGN Pro League #3 for StarCraft, over $100,000 dollars total was given to the winners and those who made it to the higher brackets. The 1st place prize was a check with $30,000 written on it. With this much money put into the game, pro players train very hard to beat their opponents. This creates extremely high level play which is exciting to watch. Professional gaming led to the creation of companies such as Razer, a professional gaming gear company. Highly competitive games such as StarCraft created the need for professional gear and new jobs as well.
StarCraft has a huge fan base. Over 60,000 people viewed the IGN Pro League #3 online from their computers, and many others went to watch it where it was happening. BarCrafts also attract many players. On Sunday, October 16th, at Biergarten in K-Town, Los Angeles, many StarCrafters, including my friend and I, showed up to watch the event that was happening that day. That event was MLG (Major League Gaming) in Orlando, the most exciting MLG yet, with so many of our favorite pro gamers on the brackets. The atmosphere there was great. Whenever something significant happened in the games we were watching, the whole crowd cheered and made a lot of noise. BarCrafts are new and growing in numbers. We might even see StarCraft on ESPN at late night sometime in the near future.
It is common to believe that videogames lead to social isolation. Games such as World of Warcraft have players sit on their computer and spend a lot of time leveling up their character and getting better gear, but that is the nature of the game. Many other games have the same effect, socially isolate players from the world. With StarCraft it is a completely different story. First of all, it is a multiplayer game, you are always playing with people. And with events like BarCraft you meet with other people of the same interest and socialize.
Most online multiplayer video games allow players to choose avatars as a way to present themselves to other players. In the game StarCraft, you begin with four basic portraits, two male ones and two female ones. The other portraits are unlockable based on achievements and wins. A player can feel empowered with wearing a thousand-win portrait, as he perceives his “elite status” on the game. “Portraits can become more important than their subjects” (Mark Stephen Meadows, 322). This statement holds true when players feel dominance and power they do not possess outside of the videogame, all because of their portrait. This may lead many players into social isolation, as they feel better about themselves on the videogame. Thankfully, the StarCraft community is full of good mannered people who praise skill over portraits, leaving portraits almost completely meaningless in value.
Female players on StarCraft are still low in numbers, but their recognition in the game is invaluable. Many female portraits exist in the game, many of which males choose to wear as well. Females are also represented in the games units. The medivac, a flying aircraft piloted by a female, has a healing beam and the ability to load up units. Medivacs are essential for healing your army and are crucial for harassment. Without these female heroes, the entire game would be imbalanced. Many female gamers dislike female representation in games because “When the female avatar is hypersexualized, it is highly likely the female player won’t even consider the title.” (Sheri Graner Ray, 327). In StarCraft, females are not hypersexualized, in fact, they are just as important as the male characters. Kerrigan, a female known as “The Queen of Blades”, controls the Zerg, the bug-like alien race. StarCraft acknowledges its female audience and represents them equally. “Ideologically, it is vitally important that girls play and enjoy computer games because it increases their comfort level with technology, and this is essential for them to maintain economic parity with males in today’s society.” (Sheri Graner Ray, 328).
Just like South Korea, StarCraft is gaining more popularity and recognition in our culture. It is truly respected as a sport internationally and people gather to enjoy the major tournaments of the game. The future looks good for StarCraft, with its growing community and increasing popularity worldwide. StarCraft is leading the world into the next generation of sports. It is not just another videogame; it is the sport of tomorrow.


LOL ^_^
Brood War player since 2003 ---> StarCraft II
AGIANTSMURF
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
United States1232 Posts
October 20 2011 04:19 GMT
#2
+ Show Spoiler +
On October 20 2011 13:16 Bacon-X wrote:
I just turned in this essay and thought I'd post it here because I wrote an essay about StarCraft cause it's just that awesome.

Sorry if I have any wrong information or something let me know ^_^ ... I rushed this essay cause i had to get it done and i had no time to do it due to working all weekend.

anyways.. here it is!!! I want to see what you guys think. Also it's pretty epic huh, i wrote an essay about StarCraft and turned it in to my English 101 teacher today hahahaha....

StarCraft, the Sport of Tomorrow
Competitive gaming has existed for a long time now, but it has never quite received such tremendous recognition from society. StarCraft has been the national sport of South Korea for many years now, but in North America, it was not as widely known and culturally accepted. Recently, however, in the US and Canada, local bars have transformed their menus and entire bar for national StarCraft events to what they call “BarCraft”. The game of StarCraft is so compelling and exciting that it brings many people together to watch major StarCraft tournaments, such as MLG (Major League Gaming) Orlando. Just like in South Korea, StarCraft is slowly but steadily rising in popularity and recognition within our culture. StarCraft is more than just another videogame, it is a real-time strategy game. StarCraft requires much learning, is highly competitive at the professional level, and generates a large fan base for major tournaments. StarCraft impacts our society by leading the world of eSports.
In StarCraft, there are 3 playable races: the Terran, Protoss, and Zerg. The Terrans are the humans, with units such as marines, tanks, and thors (huge mechanical fighting machines). The Protoss are a technologically advanced and highly religious alien race, with units such as Zealots (warriors with psionic blades), dark templars (permanently cloaked units), and motherships. The Zerg are also an alien race, but they resemble bugs and lack any technology. The basic worker units of the Zerg, are called “Drones”. And they literally morph themselves into structures and buildings. The Zerg resembles bugs in the sense that they are gross, hideous, and are great in number. When a game of starcraft starts, players train more workers to mine minerals to in order to have a higher income. With this income players begin to build structures that allow them to train an army. The players will then use that army to attack and possibly defeat their opponent.
When first starting to play, players may feel overwhelmed with the amount of content they have to learn. For example, all the structures, units, abilities, build orders, strategies, and which units are good against which. This does take time to learn, but once a player is familiar with the basic concepts of the game, they are ready to experience the awesome play of StarCraft. Even at this point, after learning the basics, players are still challenged with the task of trying to counter what their opponent has, which requires them to scout their opponents base. If you dream of playing the game professionally, you must have very quick reaction times and a minimum of 200 APM (Actions Per Minute). This is not a kid’s game at all; this is a competitive electronic sport.
The game of StarCraft is highly competitive at the pro level. In a game so delicate and fragile, a single mistake could lose you the game. Professional StarCraft players make a living off of playing the game. Many professional clans, such as Evil Geniuses, have a huge budget and house their players in a training house. A very popular and respected player Greg Fields, known as “IdrA”, dropped out of college to play StarCraft professionally. StarCraft is a very real eSport. Pro tournaments give out huge money prizes for the winners. Just recently, at the IGN Pro League #3 for StarCraft, over $100,000 dollars total was given to the winners and those who made it to the higher brackets. The 1st place prize was a check with $30,000 written on it. With this much money put into the game, pro players train very hard to beat their opponents. This creates extremely high level play which is exciting to watch. Professional gaming led to the creation of companies such as Razer, a professional gaming gear company. Highly competitive games such as StarCraft created the need for professional gear and new jobs as well.
StarCraft has a huge fan base. Over 60,000 people viewed the IGN Pro League #3 online from their computers, and many others went to watch it where it was happening. BarCrafts also attract many players. On Sunday, October 16th, at Biergarten in K-Town, Los Angeles, many StarCrafters, including my friend and I, showed up to watch the event that was happening that day. That event was MLG (Major League Gaming) in Orlando, the most exciting MLG yet, with so many of our favorite pro gamers on the brackets. The atmosphere there was great. Whenever something significant happened in the games we were watching, the whole crowd cheered and made a lot of noise. BarCrafts are new and growing in numbers. We might even see StarCraft on ESPN at late night sometime in the near future.
It is common to believe that videogames lead to social isolation. Games such as World of Warcraft have players sit on their computer and spend a lot of time leveling up their character and getting better gear, but that is the nature of the game. Many other games have the same effect, socially isolate players from the world. With StarCraft it is a completely different story. First of all, it is a multiplayer game, you are always playing with people. And with events like BarCraft you meet with other people of the same interest and socialize.
Most online multiplayer video games allow players to choose avatars as a way to present themselves to other players. In the game StarCraft, you begin with four basic portraits, two male ones and two female ones. The other portraits are unlockable based on achievements and wins. A player can feel empowered with wearing a thousand-win portrait, as he perceives his “elite status” on the game. “Portraits can become more important than their subjects” (Mark Stephen Meadows, 322). This statement holds true when players feel dominance and power they do not possess outside of the videogame, all because of their portrait. This may lead many players into social isolation, as they feel better about themselves on the videogame. Thankfully, the StarCraft community is full of good mannered people who praise skill over portraits, leaving portraits almost completely meaningless in value.
Female players on StarCraft are still low in numbers, but their recognition in the game is invaluable. Many female portraits exist in the game, many of which males choose to wear as well. Females are also represented in the games units. The medivac, a flying aircraft piloted by a female, has a healing beam and the ability to load up units. Medivacs are essential for healing your army and are crucial for harassment. Without these female heroes, the entire game would be imbalanced. Many female gamers dislike female representation in games because “When the female avatar is hypersexualized, it is highly likely the female player won’t even consider the title.” (Sheri Graner Ray, 327). In StarCraft, females are not hypersexualized, in fact, they are just as important as the male characters. Kerrigan, a female known as “The Queen of Blades”, controls the Zerg, the bug-like alien race. StarCraft acknowledges its female audience and represents them equally. “Ideologically, it is vitally important that girls play and enjoy computer games because it increases their comfort level with technology, and this is essential for them to maintain economic parity with males in today’s society.” (Sheri Graner Ray, 328).
Just like South Korea, StarCraft is gaining more popularity and recognition in our culture. It is truly respected as a sport internationally and people gather to enjoy the major tournaments of the game. The future looks good for StarCraft, with its growing community and increasing popularity worldwide. StarCraft is leading the world into the next generation of sports. It is not just another videogame; it is the sport of tomorrow.


LOL ^_^



please make sure you double space and all that jazz :D

pretty short essay for college :o
Thats "Grand-Master" SMURF to you.....
Zennith
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
United States795 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-10-20 04:22:33
October 20 2011 04:21 GMT
#3
Wall of text? I dunno, this doesn't really feel like an essay, as I'm not sure what the thesis really is. Within typical essay format, it seems your thesis maybe comes midway through the first paragraph, which makes no sense.

Otherwise, while I'm not going to do your homework for you, it seems like this is all over the map and not particularly enlightening really in any way - trying to find something feminist about starcraft in one paragraph, talking about south korea and popularity... there's no real consistency here, and so the conclusions that are drawn seem to come from nowhere.

Basically, this is just a bunch of small paragraphs put together that really in no way build or relate to one another in meaningful/insightful ways.

Maybe try going back to english 101.


EDIT: Also, you title it Sport of the future, but do not once address how it does or does not compare to traditional sporting events. Might wanna give that a try.
Sentinel Gaming Competitive Team Manager | 1500+ points Masters Zerg | twitch.tv/zennith6
Bacon-X
Profile Joined December 2010
United States266 Posts
October 20 2011 04:23 GMT
#4
On October 20 2011 13:21 Zennith wrote:
Wall of text? I dunno, this doesn't really feel like an essay, as I'm not sure what the thesis really is. Within typical essay format, it seems your thesis maybe comes midway through the first paragraph, which makes no sense.

Otherwise, while I'm not going to do your homework for you, it seems like this is all over the map and not particularly enlightening really in any way - trying to find something feminist about starcraft in one paragraph, talking about south korea and popularity... there's no real consistency here, and so the conclusions that are drawn seem to come from nowhere.

Basically, this is just a bunch of small paragraphs put together that really in no way build or relate to one another in meaningful/insightful ways.

Maybe try going back to english 101.



Well.. the thesis for the essay was "to what extent to videogames effect our education, social interaction, and our culture as a whole" pretty much...

I had to add the avatar paragraph and the female stuff because I was forced to use 2 sources from our textbook so i had to write about them... like i said this was last minute stuff... but yeah..
Brood War player since 2003 ---> StarCraft II
Bacon-X
Profile Joined December 2010
United States266 Posts
October 20 2011 04:24 GMT
#5
oh and the formatting fucked up when i copy pasted.
Brood War player since 2003 ---> StarCraft II
cristo1122
Profile Blog Joined November 2010
Australia505 Posts
October 20 2011 04:25 GMT
#6
probly blogs
better place
ZvP imbalanced blizzards solution nerf terran
publicenemies
Profile Blog Joined June 2011
458 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-10-20 04:25:53
October 20 2011 04:25 GMT
#7
On October 20 2011 13:21 Zennith wrote:
Wall of text? I dunno, this doesn't really feel like an essay, as I'm not sure what the thesis really is. Within typical essay format, it seems your thesis maybe comes midway through the first paragraph, which makes no sense.

Otherwise, while I'm not going to do your homework for you, it seems like this is all over the map and not particularly enlightening really in any way - trying to find something feminist about starcraft in one paragraph, talking about south korea and popularity... there's no real consistency here, and so the conclusions that are drawn seem to come from nowhere.

Basically, this is just a bunch of small paragraphs put together that really in no way build or relate to one another in meaningful/insightful ways.

Maybe try going back to english 101.


EDIT: Also, you title it Sport of the future, but do not once address how it does or does not compare to traditional sporting events. Might wanna give that a try.

What he's trying to say is that you need to specify what you're writing about. Are you writing about the rise of Starcraft in western culture or are you writing about how females are represented in the game?
Good advice on the going back to English 101 lol
SpectralFremen
Profile Joined January 2011
Australia386 Posts
October 20 2011 04:25 GMT
#8
Sorry but your "essay" is terrible. I couldn't even bring myself to finish reading it. Are you sure you're in college?
"And so he spoke, and so he spoke, that lord of Castamere"
hiyo_bye
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
United States737 Posts
October 20 2011 04:25 GMT
#9
"StarCraft has been the national sport of South Korea for many years now"

I don't think that's true, but I could be wrong...
Random
Bacon-X
Profile Joined December 2010
United States266 Posts
October 20 2011 04:27 GMT
#10
LOL, of course, i should have expected bad mannered people and internet bullies when trying to share something cool with the starcraft community -_______________-;
Brood War player since 2003 ---> StarCraft II
lalabou
Profile Joined April 2010
Canada10 Posts
October 20 2011 04:27 GMT
#11
It's great that you decided to write about Starcraft and all but..your writing is in need of alot of improvement.
Spray
Profile Blog Joined July 2011
United States402 Posts
October 20 2011 04:27 GMT
#12
I feel like this doesn't really flow. Kinda just abunch of paragraphs that sort of tie in together. i dunno
HuK Fighting~~!
Veldril
Profile Joined August 2010
Thailand1817 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-10-20 04:28:29
October 20 2011 04:28 GMT
#13
Huh, I just submitted Esports related essay for my English writing class too *_*
Without love, we can't see anything. Without love, the truth can't be seen. - Umineko no Naku Koro Ni
publicenemies
Profile Blog Joined June 2011
458 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-10-20 04:31:01
October 20 2011 04:28 GMT
#14
On October 20 2011 13:27 Bacon-X wrote:
LOL, of course, i should have expected bad mannered people and internet bullies when trying to share something cool with the starcraft community -_______________-;

if correcting mistakes can be considered as a form of bullying, then I had it wrong all along.
Rokusha
Profile Joined January 2011
United States207 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-10-20 04:30:24
October 20 2011 04:28 GMT
#15
To be honest, the essay need a lot of rework. Should have taken the time to write it instead of putting it off to the last second

There doesn't seem to be an underlying thesis or an idea that connects the paragraphs you wrote. Just seems like unrelated things put into a paragraph essay.
Bacon-X
Profile Joined December 2010
United States266 Posts
October 20 2011 04:30 GMT
#16
On October 20 2011 13:28 publicenemies wrote:
Show nested quote +
On October 20 2011 13:27 Bacon-X wrote:
LOL, of course, i should have expected bad mannered people and internet bullies when trying to share something cool with the starcraft community -_______________-;

if correcting mistakes can be considered as a form of bullying, then I had it all wrong all along.



Naw it wasn't the helpful comments.. it was the ones who said i'm dumb and stuff...

yeah my writing isn't good and all but you know what... at least i tried...

I didn't have that much time to do it though so.. yeaaah... lol
Brood War player since 2003 ---> StarCraft II
necrOtix
Profile Joined August 2011
81 Posts
October 20 2011 04:32 GMT
#17
I don't think the bit about portraits was necessary (kinda irrelevant). Best go into more depth about GSL / BW history / or teamliquid / reddit communites instead.
sToFu
Profile Joined August 2011
United States189 Posts
October 20 2011 04:33 GMT
#18
On October 20 2011 13:23 Bacon-X wrote:
Show nested quote +
On October 20 2011 13:21 Zennith wrote:
Wall of text? I dunno, this doesn't really feel like an essay, as I'm not sure what the thesis really is. Within typical essay format, it seems your thesis maybe comes midway through the first paragraph, which makes no sense.

Otherwise, while I'm not going to do your homework for you, it seems like this is all over the map and not particularly enlightening really in any way - trying to find something feminist about starcraft in one paragraph, talking about south korea and popularity... there's no real consistency here, and so the conclusions that are drawn seem to come from nowhere.

Basically, this is just a bunch of small paragraphs put together that really in no way build or relate to one another in meaningful/insightful ways.

Maybe try going back to english 101.



Well.. the thesis for the essay was "to what extent to videogames effect our education, social interaction, and our culture as a whole" pretty much...

I had to add the avatar paragraph and the female stuff because I was forced to use 2 sources from our textbook so i had to write about them... like i said this was last minute stuff... but yeah..


I think it's really cool that you have the guts to write about Starcraft in an essay, but...
The essay doesn't answer the prompt at all. Nor does it flow.
Bacon-X
Profile Joined December 2010
United States266 Posts
October 20 2011 04:35 GMT
#19
On October 20 2011 13:33 sToFu wrote:
Show nested quote +
On October 20 2011 13:23 Bacon-X wrote:
On October 20 2011 13:21 Zennith wrote:
Wall of text? I dunno, this doesn't really feel like an essay, as I'm not sure what the thesis really is. Within typical essay format, it seems your thesis maybe comes midway through the first paragraph, which makes no sense.

Otherwise, while I'm not going to do your homework for you, it seems like this is all over the map and not particularly enlightening really in any way - trying to find something feminist about starcraft in one paragraph, talking about south korea and popularity... there's no real consistency here, and so the conclusions that are drawn seem to come from nowhere.

Basically, this is just a bunch of small paragraphs put together that really in no way build or relate to one another in meaningful/insightful ways.

Maybe try going back to english 101.



Well.. the thesis for the essay was "to what extent to videogames effect our education, social interaction, and our culture as a whole" pretty much...

I had to add the avatar paragraph and the female stuff because I was forced to use 2 sources from our textbook so i had to write about them... like i said this was last minute stuff... but yeah..


I think it's really cool that you have the guts to write about Starcraft in an essay, but...
The essay doesn't answer the prompt at all. Nor does it flow.



Yeah but like I said i had no time i had to do it last minute and i was forced to write about females in games and avatars since those were articles in the book and we had to quote the articles in our text book. so yeah.. it doesn't flow i know but i had to do that.
Brood War player since 2003 ---> StarCraft II
SpectralFremen
Profile Joined January 2011
Australia386 Posts
October 20 2011 04:37 GMT
#20
Sorry for my honesty. I'll write what you want to hear instead of what you need to hear instead.

The essay is fantastic, you are surely going to pass with flying colours. If your teacher gives you anything less then perfect marks you should sue them for harassment.
"And so he spoke, and so he spoke, that lord of Castamere"
1 2 3 4 Next All
Please log in or register to reply.
Live Events Refresh
Afreeca Starleague
10:00
Ro16 Group Selection
Afreeca ASL 11495
Liquipedia
[ Submit Event ]
Live Streams
Refresh
StarCraft 2
SortOf 164
Lowko117
ProTech63
Codebar 20
StarCraft: Brood War
Calm 2338
BeSt 1301
Hyuk 558
Larva 272
Zeus 254
Killer 233
ggaemo 128
ToSsGirL 80
Pusan 52
Mind 50
[ Show more ]
Aegong 40
Shinee 36
NaDa 27
Hm[arnc] 23
yabsab 22
ajuk12(nOOB) 14
Bale 11
Noble 8
Terrorterran 8
GoRush 7
Dota 2
XcaliburYe647
League of Legends
JimRising 429
Counter-Strike
shoxiejesuss1018
olofmeister963
Heroes of the Storm
Khaldor174
Other Games
summit1g10083
singsing649
crisheroes201
Happy130
Sick75
Organizations
Counter-Strike
PGL7989
Other Games
BasetradeTV224
StarCraft: Brood War
UltimateBattle 215
lovetv 3
StarCraft 2
Blizzard YouTube
StarCraft: Brood War
BSLTrovo
sctven
[ Show 14 non-featured ]
StarCraft 2
• LUISG 51
• Adnapsc2 15
• StrangeGG 6
• AfreecaTV YouTube
• intothetv
• Kozan
• IndyKCrew
• LaughNgamezSOOP
• Migwel
• sooper7s
StarCraft: Brood War
• BSLYoutube
• STPLYoutube
• ZZZeroYoutube
League of Legends
• Stunt494
Upcoming Events
Wardi Open
43m
Replay Cast
13h 43m
Sparkling Tuna Cup
23h 43m
PiGosaur Cup
1d 13h
Kung Fu Cup
2 days
The PondCast
2 days
Replay Cast
3 days
Replay Cast
4 days
CranKy Ducklings
4 days
BSL
5 days
[ Show More ]
Replay Cast
5 days
Sparkling Tuna Cup
5 days
BSL
6 days
Replay Cast
6 days
Wardi Open
6 days
Liquipedia Results

Completed

CSL Elite League 2026
RSL Revival: Season 4
NationLESS Cup

Ongoing

BSL Season 22
ASL Season 21
CSL Season 20: Qualifier 2
CSL 2026 SPRING (S20)
StarCraft2 Community Team League 2026 Spring
Nations Cup 2026
PGL Bucharest 2026
Stake Ranked Episode 1
BLAST Open Spring 2026
ESL Pro League S23 Finals
ESL Pro League S23 Stage 1&2
PGL Cluj-Napoca 2026
IEM Kraków 2026
BLAST Bounty Winter 2026

Upcoming

Escore Tournament S2: W2
IPSL Spring 2026
Escore Tournament S2: W3
Acropolis #4
BSL 22 Non-Korean Championship
CSLAN 4
Kung Fu Cup 2026 Grand Finals
HSC XXIX
uThermal 2v2 2026 Main Event
RSL Revival: Season 5
IEM Cologne Major 2026
Stake Ranked Episode 2
CS Asia Championships 2026
Asian Champions League 2026
IEM Atlanta 2026
PGL Astana 2026
BLAST Rivals Spring 2026
CCT Season 3 Global Finals
IEM Rio 2026
TLPD

1. ByuN
2. TY
3. Dark
4. Solar
5. Stats
6. Nerchio
7. sOs
8. soO
9. INnoVation
10. Elazer
1. Rain
2. Flash
3. EffOrt
4. Last
5. Bisu
6. Soulkey
7. Mini
8. Sharp
Sidebar Settings...

Advertising | Privacy Policy | Terms Of Use | Contact Us

Original banner artwork: Jim Warren
The contents of this webpage are copyright © 2026 TLnet. All Rights Reserved.