I'm an idiot when it come to women, help please - Page 4
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fredd
Estonia256 Posts
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DND_Enkil
Sweden598 Posts
On November 03 2010 22:09 flag wrote: I have read everyones analysis. Overall it is very good for explaining my mistake. I think you guys nailed it by explaining that by continuing to explain it away it made her think the original joke was even more serious. Not so much advice on what to now, besides drop it or be sincere. Actually before going through all the posts I wrote up a fairly long letter that is very sincere. I basically say what everyone here would say not to do. I explain that I like her and that is why I act so stupid. (I also address another mistake that I did not describe in the OP post, which was that to try to show that I like her I would make inappropriate jokes and they got to be too much). My dilemma now though is do I send it now (while she might be busy at work) or wait until I think she would have time to sit down and really read it? Also Charlie, sorry I don't really play SC any more, but even if I did, I would suck now... This is just my opinion, but dont think you should post that letter. At all. And saying that you act stupid/do stupid jokes because you like her is not a good idea, been there done that failed there moved on. Actually unless she seems to like you acting stupid or making stupid jokes you should stop doing that aswell. Ask her straight up to do something together just the two of you. Dont have to be something fancy, movie at your place. Dinner out. Anything, important part is just the two of you. If you know her only in a group enviroment (cant tell from OP) this is imo the first step to get it somewhere else. If you are already here she is already interested in you or just sees you as a friend. If she is interested i you she is just waiting for you to take the first step. Take it. If she just sees you as a friend, and you do hang out just the two of you, you have little to lose telling her you like her. Unless you do some epic drama-fail if she tells you she only sees you as a friend the friendship will survive, have yet to meet a girl who gets mad because you say you like her. If you keep cool i dont think you have anything to lose, but eh... if this incident have been a big deal you might want to play it cool for a while before making a move. Drop the issue and try to move on as normal. If she brings it up or stops talking to you, have a talking with her but dont get super apolegetic, explain you did it as a joke and most importantly it was not a big deal for you and you feel sorry she takes this small joke as a major issue. | ||
Happy.fairytail
United States327 Posts
On November 04 2010 00:14 fredd wrote: wow, man. just wow. i think you got all the help you needed, so i'm just going to express my bafflement. anyway, just make sure you learn from this and stay cool next time. she doesn't really seem that great from what i read anyway, no big deal. you're never going to get with her now, i am 100% sure of this, so just remember what you did wrong and move on. Haha, actually, you have a good point. OP, maybe you should just post that letter. Because (1) you have no chance with her anyway, so you have nothing to lose, and (2) you learn best by personal experience, right? Heh, I still cringe when I think about the ways I've asked out girls years ago. One girl's reaction still remains fresh in my mind to this day: "...what? ...NOooooOOO!!" LOL, oh god, yep, it still hurts to think about it. | ||
lixlix
United States482 Posts
Just take it in stride. Don't act like its a big deal and don't bring up the incident again. In fact, the next time you make a joke that appears to insult some woman, just laugh it off and act like its no big deal. Don't be overly apologetic. Most likely you've already blown it with this one. If you really are hung up on this chick (you really shouldn't be), your best bet is to somehow have her see you as the life of the party preferably with another girl hotter than she is. But then if you can pull that off, you wouldn't be so strung out by this girl anyways. | ||
Korynne
Canada990 Posts
On November 03 2010 14:05 flag wrote: This is good analysis, but what should I do now? I'm thinking leave her alone until she talks to me? Is this right? I know you're incapable of doing this, but here's what you should do: Pretend the whole thing didn't happen, continue with life as normal, talk to her normally. I mean if she asks don't be like, what? are you crazy? I don't recall that ever happening. Just /act/ as if it didn't happen, rather than like, you know, literally wiping it away. Be cool dude~ | ||
Thrill
2599 Posts
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Turbovolver
Australia2346 Posts
On November 04 2010 10:59 Thrill wrote: If she's this insecure about the look of her own face, you should maybe think twice about pursuing this further.. Is this a joke? =/ I don't think the fact he put her face on that weird creepy picture is the problem here, somehow. | ||
opsayo
591 Posts
jesus christ bro | ||
baller
527 Posts
only way imo | ||
Falling
Canada11218 Posts
On November 03 2010 22:09 flag wrote: I have read everyones analysis. Overall it is very good for explaining my mistake. I think you guys nailed it by explaining that by continuing to explain it away it made her think the original joke was even more serious. Not so much advice on what to now, besides drop it or be sincere. Actually before going through all the posts I wrote up a fairly long letter that is very sincere. That's the thing. There is nothing proactive you can do regarding that mistake. You said it. She didn't like it. You apologized. It's over. Be the friend you always were because that's all you really can do. And for heavens sake, don't send that letter. You're just explaining yet again. Let her forget the whole thing because you're not letting her forget it at all. People say and do dumb stuff all the time so watch your tongue and actions in the future. But just let her forget about the entire thing already. But right now all your associating yourself is being that guy that just talks about boobs or apologizes about talking about them. lol at the above. On November 03 2010 14:37 crazeman wrote: We need baller imo baller to the rescue. Totally would work. | ||
Hidden_MotiveS
Canada2562 Posts
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Otakusan
United States59 Posts
But yeah, if she minds THAT much and your friendship/bedroom chances are hindered because of this, she probably wasn't worth it in the first place. Unless she's fucking hot. Then, you know, invite her over to your house, and another friend. You and your friend start drinking (without letting her know first, of course), playing drinking games, then invite her to join. She joins. She drinks. Your friend then leaves (of course, at your signal). She drove herself to your place, and she can't drive back home. So you offer your bed to her like a fucking gentleman and you sleep on the floor. If she's drunk enough... bingo! (whether this is intertwined with personal experience is up for you to decide) | ||
Zidane
United States1684 Posts
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opsayo
591 Posts
i am gonna brood over it thinking about her for 2 weeks straight constantly talking to her and then in my free time write her a long in depth letter so that she doesn't think i am creepy anymore | ||
flag
United States228 Posts
On November 03 2010 17:05 Rekrul wrote: men making big deals out of nothing (or reacting like they care when women make big deals out of nothing) is a huge turn-off to women On November 03 2010 23:17 CharlieMurphy wrote: I wouldn't even send the letter unless she brings it up again or seems to be avoiding you or something. Dropping it is the best thing to do. What Rek said makes a lot of sense. Telling her you act stupid when trying to be cool is, stupid. don't do that. This isn't a fairy tale TV show where the clumsy guy gets the beautiful girl by fucking up everything then confessing his love and admitting his retardedness because of his love for her. On November 03 2010 23:52 Happy.fairytail wrote: Nooooooo nonono don't send the letter. Just DROP IT holy crap man. And if you're gonna tell a girl you like her, do it in a nice setting. Like after dinner, after hanging out, take her to a nice viewpoint nearby, prepare something classy, anything. Not by a letter, e-mail, text, facebook, or anything like that. (other post that rang true that I had to omit for brevity). I realized that I need to just chill out and let it be what it is. Asking for advice on the forum was another stupid thing to do. Subconsciously I wanted to be punished for my stupid actions, and I think deep down I wanted her to discover this blog and that it would make it all better. The first is pointless, and the second is unlikely and would probably be a bad thing anyways. Also like advised, it would have been bad to send that letter (especially while she still might be creeped out). If it ever comes up again I will talk about it honestly, but not with hopes of getting with her. We are back on good standing, but my chances are probably near 0, and I'm cool with that. Lessons learned: Chill the fuck out Don't say anything major except in person Don't seek advice from a forum (any action that you take that is not yours cannot work). To those that gave good advice and those that insulted me, thank you very much for your help. | ||
CharlieMurphy
United States22895 Posts
also, you are overanalyzing shit. This ain't a game of SC, social situations aren't as complex. There isn't some hidden tech, or ultimate game plan/playstyle. Just go with the flow. If you really want to learn any of the simple shit that works in dating/pick up arts. Check out all those guidlines and tips and apply them to your game. I think this a forum may be a place to start http://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/ | ||
flag
United States228 Posts
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HULKAMANIA
United States1219 Posts
"Pick-up artists" are hands-down the lamest, smarmiest, most uncomprehending pseudomales in history. Case in point: | ||
a176
Canada6688 Posts
do you date regularly? if not, i think its time to start. | ||
Gogleion
United States534 Posts
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