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So, I've grown up in a small suburb in connecticut, 45 minutes outside of new york. I'd be the first to say I've had a privileged childhood, but honestly, compared to most of the people I've grown up with, I'm dirt poor.
I'm a senior in high school, and my parents expressed their displeasure with the town we live in repeatedly over the past few years, but we haven't moved yet because I didn't want to leave behind my friends and everything I had established here. Since I'm graduating next spring, they let me know that after I graduate they plan on moving away from this town to the middle-of-###%ing-nowheresville, in northern Maine.
My parents planned on me going off to college, but I pretty much don't have the grades to get in at this point, and my guidance counselor suggested that I go to community college for 2 years to fix my transcript and then apply to a better school.
So I'm kind of stuck. I really don't want to live where they plan on moving to. I couldn't imagine being so detached from society, growing up with basically the greatest city in the entire world just a short train ride away, moving to some rural village is just unimaginable.
So I've come to the TL to ask, how feasible is it for someone, just out of high school, to get a job and support himself while attending college? I know how to be self sufficient, I do my own laundry, i can do dishes, I'm relatively clean and i can cook well enough that i wont starve, but does anyone here have any experience moving out at a young age?
TLDR: How feasible would it be for someone my age to support himself?
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On September 20 2010 09:39 Hakker wrote:
So, I've grown up in a small suburb in connecticut, 45 minutes outside of new york. I'd be the first to say I've had a privileged childhood, but honestly, compared to most of the people I've grown up with, I'm dirt poor.
I'm a senior in high school, and my parents expressed their displeasure with the town we live in repeatedly over the past few years, but we haven't moved yet because I didn't want to leave behind my friends and everything I had established here. Since I'm graduating next spring, they let me know that after I graduate they plan on moving away from this town to the middle-of-###%ing-nowheresville, in northern Maine.
My parents planned on me going off to college, but I pretty much don't have the grades to get in at this point, and my guidance counselor suggested that I go to community college for 2 years to fix my transcript and then apply to a better school.
So I'm kind of stuck. I really don't want to live where they plan on moving to. I couldn't imagine being so detached from society, growing up with basically the greatest city in the entire world just a short train ride away, moving to some rural village is just unimaginable.
So I've come to the OT to ask, how feasible is it for someone, just out of high school, to get a job and support himself while attending college? I know how to be self sufficient, I do my own laundry, i can do dishes, I'm relatively clean and i can cook well enough that i wont starve, but does anyone here have any experience moving out at a young age?
TLDR: How feasible would it be for someone my age to support himself?
Honestly? Not very.
Bills stack up fast and the cost of living in the NE isn't exactly low. It's pretty much impossible to support both school and rent/cable/water/food at the same time unless you get scholarships/financial aid.
Even the cheapest places for rent are going to cost you at least 600 dollars a month and + all the bills a good 1100 a month is likely. Then there is tuition.
My advice is to just man up, go to Maine..DO GOOD IN SCHOOL, and then transfer back to NY city or something. It can be done but you'll be living paycheck to paycheck without any money to go out and be social.
IF you don't have a car don't even entertain the idea.
If your last semester are pretty much all A's and you try and score high on the SAT you may well get accepted somewhere close ...you just have to put effort into it. Last 2 semesters at 3.5-4 GPA + a 1200 (out of 1600 that matter) SAT is pretty smooth sailing tbh. It'll show you straightened out.
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It depends on your situation, but in most cases you should be more then fine. Finding a job and keeping up with community college is a walk in the park. And since your parents probably have a college fund for you, you can live off that once you wanna pursue higher studies. There is no downside to you moving out. The parents will still help you out if you really need it. TL is here for you as well. Give it a try. If all else fails, you can trail after mom and pop in the middle of nowhere and see what life is like over there for a while until you get back on your feet.
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I'd recommend getting a job and trying to support yourself at the earliest age possible. It's like the first properly valuable life experience and most people won't go through it until 21++
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It is possible, but I highly discourage you from doing it.
If you go to community college to bolster your grades, you need time to study. I kind of doubt you can get super-good grades while working on a lot of part time jobs to be able to support yourself.
So yea, I highly recommend you to stay with your parents and do college at the middle of nowhere you referred to.
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Okay, I don't want to go into too many details, but... Yes, I had to move out when I was young. I stayed self-sufficient. Go in-state and work your butt off. I was able to support myself at a reasonable standard of living, in my opinion at least. Given, I went massively into debt, but that is part of higher education these days. You can get student loans if you have a job, no bad credit, and keep your shit together.
You can do it. It will be hard. It was very hard for me and I was fortunate enough to have a pretty solid job. Taking care of yourself is worth it. You'll find that when you make a decision or take a risk to achieve something you are sincere about, the hardships feel vindicating and the outcome, good or bad, is secondary to the journey. The means are the ends.
Consider whether you feel you can honestly do it, actually take care of yourself. If you can, go for it. If you cannot, then just accept the state of your circumstances. We are not always involved in choosing the things that shape our lives. Sorry, bud.
If you do this on your own... you will likely live below the poverty line. I currently am still forced to live off of less than 10K a year. It is not glamorous, it is not our society's definition of fun. But I am a progressing renunciant, so forgoing new clothes, partying, eating out, driving much (if you even own a car, which only recently changed for me), and even having a diverse diet (i eat healthy but eat basically the same thing every day with almost no exceptions) is good for me. I like owning nothing. The computer I am using now is my only real indulgence I've taken. Maybe one day, I'll grow up and get rid of this, too.
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Its tottaly doable if ur willing to sacrifice a bit and work for it. look for a place that neexs roommates or put up an ad that your looking to rent a room, u could find a place and mannage to live on a part time job
may not be glamorous but better then moving away and being unhappy and stuck
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depending on your major, if you're going to be working + going to CC it's going to take you at least three years until you can transfer to a uni
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you should move with your parents and find a community college there
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I seriously doubt OP can work and be sufficient financially and be good in school. It's quite hard - and you will live miserably.
Research the possible colleges at the Middle of Nowhere first. If there is nothing there, then you should consider living by yourself.
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do you even have any money saved up? living on your own at some minimum wage job paycheck to paycheck is dangerous. what if your car breaks down and you can't afford to fix it then you fall behind in rent etc etc. Make sure you account for all the possibilities because in real life nothing goes as smoothly as you hope.
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You'll have to be the very word of frugality. My dad moved out when he was 16 and supported himself up till now where he makes 150 k a year. He worked at Mc'D's all day and took night school. I admire him a lot for that.
Yeah you're gonna have to grit your teeth, but you can do it. Don't expect to eat much besides white rice and employee discount burgers tho.
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Vatican City State1650 Posts
You should have studied more before complaining like this -_- You say so yourself:
On September 20 2010 09:39 Hakker wrote:
My parents planned on me going off to college, but I pretty much don't have the grades to get in at this point
Man it up. Go to community school. Two years of staying away from "friends" is nothing. Perhaps that may actually let you improve your grades too.
You know what I think? Someone who's so unadaptable that you can't bear to move to a different city, definitely doesn't have the resolve nor fortitude to live by yourself, with all the responsibilities inherent in such a decision.
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lets be smart about this shall we? If you stay were you are you'll be dirt fucking tired from working and won't have enough time/energy for school and friends. Accelerate a few years and I see you in the exact same spot you were in when your parents left. My advice go with your parents focus on school for two years. Save up some cash, play some scbw etc.... Don't fall into the trap your real friends will be there when you get back.
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If you get a roommate living away from your parents is easier. I'm in college right now and my roommates do some of the chores and one of them has a car. It's definitely cheaper than if i tried to get my own apartment by myself. Just because you're "living alone" doesn't mean you have to live alone.
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Northern Maine means you would be close to Canada? I'd use that opportunity to go with your parents, go to Community College and potentially explore some? Life experiences like these can be very beneficial and rewarding if you go into it with a positive attitude. You could honestly potentially still head back to visit friends from time to time.
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I've done it for the past two years, it's hard but It's definitely doable. Try to get scholarships if you can paying for school itself is definitely the hardest part. That and rent.
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Stay with your parents as long as you can, you don't realise how easy you've got it there until it's gone.
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Its not like his parents are kicking him out or dying.... I say you get out and experience real life and then in a year you can always transfer back home or suspend your course while you regain your feet. You dont really have the motivation to pass a college course right now (if you can't outright deny this then you're 90% going to fail it) and working full time will give you a taste of how important passing college really is.
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Seriously man. You should move with your parents and go ahead with attending community college for a couple years. I am in the same boat as you right now. My parents want to move across the state and I'd prefer to stay here, but I intend on going because with a job and still living at home I can afford to go to community college. Education is really important, I've been working this manufacturing job locally and I've got to say. . . there's no "real life experience" you're going to be missing.
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EPT
