On April 16 2012 15:23 MrSkyfire wrote: friend linked me this as i'd been going through some dark things lately.. dno what about it kept me going but it did.. thought i'd share with tl, but i found it with search (dont need to be banned for not search .. last thing i need ..)
Fall quarter I called Suicide Prevention. I'd called them before and the people were nice, but this time the woman acted a little indignant. "Why the hell do you want to do something like that?" she asked. We talked until she said she had other phone calls. But she made me promise I wouldn't try it without calling back first. I had a bottle of Coricidin from a wisdom tooth operation. I'd been thinking about it for a month off and on. Much later that night I took ten Coricidin and went to bed. I woke up in the morning feeling really rotten -- weepy, groggy. I could hardly move I thought I was going to die any minute. My roommate came home and got a friend to drive me to the school infirmary, where they gave me something that made me sick to my stomach. The doctor who gave it to me calmed me down. She said it happens to a lot of people, the pills wouldn't hurt me. I felt tingly, like I might pass out any minute.
I was immediately taken in a wheelchair to the psychiatrist's office. I talked to him about five minutes. He kept yelling ta me about why did I take the pills, why didn't I do this or that. I remember thinking, boy this man is a real jerk. I told him I didn't want to see him any more. He said, "That's fine," and put me in a locked room with bars on the windows. I couldn't make phone calls. I felt humiliated, which made me angry. I'm not crazy. I'm not weird. I don't want people to look at me like I'm nuts. I'm not some nutty kid who tried to knock herself off. I was most angry at being stuck in that room. I expected to be put in a straitjacket any minute. I complained until they moved me a pretty room and let me make phone calls.
I was there about two weeks. My psychiatrist kept harping at me about school -- was I going to stay in or drop out? I saw him ten minutes a day. The other patients and one orderly helped me a lot more than he did. I just wanted to find a place where I could be alone and think about things. I left feeling like not much had been accomplished, except letting me know that I didn't want to attempt it again. No -- I feel like I've become a lot more sensitive to people. I don't look at their problems as trivial any more. I almost like it when my friends come to me with problems. I feel like I can help now. I still haven't told the two people I was most angry at -- my father and my boyfriend -- why I was in the hospital.
so close to home it is unreal..
i keep going because of my friend, maybe these notes will give someone some persepctive like it did me
What the hell that school has some unprofessional employees.
On April 16 2012 15:24 HolyArrow wrote: Impressive necro we have here.
I have noticed that there has been a lot of very old threads showing up lately. Not sure why... Kinda neat going through the posts though, seems like everyone has a special user icon.
On April 16 2012 15:23 MrSkyfire wrote: friend linked me this as i'd been going through some dark things lately.. dno what about it kept me going but it did.. thought i'd share with tl, but i found it with search (dont need to be banned for not search .. last thing i need ..)
Fall quarter I called Suicide Prevention. I'd called them before and the people were nice, but this time the woman acted a little indignant. "Why the hell do you want to do something like that?" she asked. We talked until she said she had other phone calls. But she made me promise I wouldn't try it without calling back first. I had a bottle of Coricidin from a wisdom tooth operation. I'd been thinking about it for a month off and on. Much later that night I took ten Coricidin and went to bed. I woke up in the morning feeling really rotten -- weepy, groggy. I could hardly move I thought I was going to die any minute. My roommate came home and got a friend to drive me to the school infirmary, where they gave me something that made me sick to my stomach. The doctor who gave it to me calmed me down. She said it happens to a lot of people, the pills wouldn't hurt me. I felt tingly, like I might pass out any minute.
I was immediately taken in a wheelchair to the psychiatrist's office. I talked to him about five minutes. He kept yelling ta me about why did I take the pills, why didn't I do this or that. I remember thinking, boy this man is a real jerk. I told him I didn't want to see him any more. He said, "That's fine," and put me in a locked room with bars on the windows. I couldn't make phone calls. I felt humiliated, which made me angry. I'm not crazy. I'm not weird. I don't want people to look at me like I'm nuts. I'm not some nutty kid who tried to knock herself off. I was most angry at being stuck in that room. I expected to be put in a straitjacket any minute. I complained until they moved me a pretty room and let me make phone calls.
I was there about two weeks. My psychiatrist kept harping at me about school -- was I going to stay in or drop out? I saw him ten minutes a day. The other patients and one orderly helped me a lot more than he did. I just wanted to find a place where I could be alone and think about things. I left feeling like not much had been accomplished, except letting me know that I didn't want to attempt it again. No -- I feel like I've become a lot more sensitive to people. I don't look at their problems as trivial any more. I almost like it when my friends come to me with problems. I feel like I can help now. I still haven't told the two people I was most angry at -- my father and my boyfriend -- why I was in the hospital.
so close to home it is unreal..
i keep going because of my friend, maybe these notes will give someone some persepctive like it did me
When you go threw shit, you always come out stronger. Its wierd, because most of the things that drive people to suicide are mental conflicts. If you can fight that mental battle and win, then I feel those are some of the strongest people in the world. Physical pain holds no weight in their lives, they have already conquered the mental pain.
I know this is a necro and all, but I am the only person who finds this sick?
These are suicide notes - people's innermost thoughts and feelings before they kill themselves, and the people reading them seem to be taking them so lightly and treating them as entertainment. :s
On April 16 2012 15:50 Sarang wrote: I know this is a necro and all, but I am the only person who finds this sick?
These are suicide notes - people's innermost thoughts and feelings before they kill themselves, and the people reading them seem to be taking them so lightly and treating them as entertainment. :s
no youre not.
but at the same time, people mature. looking at the post dates, i know that if i were reading this thread back when it originated, id probably find myself posting similar sarcastic remarks. however the person i was in 2006 is drastically different from the person i am now. essentially my point is that while you are in the right to find the behavior bothersome, i wouldnt go so far as to start judging people based on six year old posts.
On April 16 2012 15:23 MrSkyfire wrote: friend linked me this as i'd been going through some dark things lately.. dno what about it kept me going but it did.. thought i'd share with tl, but i found it with search (dont need to be banned for not search .. last thing i need ..)
Trina, a college student, 21 years old
Fall quarter I called Suicide Prevention. I'd called them before and the people were nice, but this time the woman acted a little indignant. "Why the hell do you want to do something like that?" she asked. We talked until she said she had other phone calls. But she made me promise I wouldn't try it without calling back first. I had a bottle of Coricidin from a wisdom tooth operation. I'd been thinking about it for a month off and on. Much later that night I took ten Coricidin and went to bed. I woke up in the morning feeling really rotten -- weepy, groggy. I could hardly move I thought I was going to die any minute. My roommate came home and got a friend to drive me to the school infirmary, where they gave me something that made me sick to my stomach. The doctor who gave it to me calmed me down. She said it happens to a lot of people, the pills wouldn't hurt me. I felt tingly, like I might pass out any minute.
I was immediately taken in a wheelchair to the psychiatrist's office. I talked to him about five minutes. He kept yelling ta me about why did I take the pills, why didn't I do this or that. I remember thinking, boy this man is a real jerk. I told him I didn't want to see him any more. He said, "That's fine," and put me in a locked room with bars on the windows. I couldn't make phone calls. I felt humiliated, which made me angry. I'm not crazy. I'm not weird. I don't want people to look at me like I'm nuts. I'm not some nutty kid who tried to knock herself off. I was most angry at being stuck in that room. I expected to be put in a straitjacket any minute. I complained until they moved me a pretty room and let me make phone calls.
I was there about two weeks. My psychiatrist kept harping at me about school -- was I going to stay in or drop out? I saw him ten minutes a day. The other patients and one orderly helped me a lot more than he did. I just wanted to find a place where I could be alone and think about things. I left feeling like not much had been accomplished, except letting me know that I didn't want to attempt it again. No -- I feel like I've become a lot more sensitive to people. I don't look at their problems as trivial any more. I almost like it when my friends come to me with problems. I feel like I can help now. I still haven't told the two people I was most angry at -- my father and my boyfriend -- why I was in the hospital.
so close to home it is unreal..
i keep going because of my friend, maybe these notes will give someone some persepctive like it did me
When you go threw shit, you always come out stronger. Its wierd, because most of the things that drive people to suicide are mental conflicts. If you can fight that mental battle and win, then I feel those are some of the strongest people in the world. Physical pain holds no weight in their lives, they have already conquered the mental pain.
I think this is true too. Any idea why the brain does this?
On April 16 2012 15:50 Sarang wrote: I know this is a necro and all, but I am the only person who finds this sick?
These are suicide notes - people's innermost thoughts and feelings before they kill themselves, and the people reading them seem to be taking them so lightly and treating them as entertainment. :s
no youre not.
but at the same time, people mature. looking at the post dates, i know that if i were reading this thread back when it originated, id probably find myself posting similar sarcastic remarks. however the person i was in 2006 is drastically different from the person i am now. essentially my point is that while you are in the right to find the behavior bothersome, i wouldnt go so far as to start judging people based on six year old posts.
Yes that's true, six years is a long time - didn't really register the fact that it's been that long.
I won't judge anyone on what they said years ago, but if i'd be saddened and a bit sickened if someone treated them as entertainment today.
On April 16 2012 15:23 MrSkyfire wrote: friend linked me this as i'd been going through some dark things lately.. dno what about it kept me going but it did.. thought i'd share with tl, but i found it with search (dont need to be banned for not search .. last thing i need ..)
Fall quarter I called Suicide Prevention. I'd called them before and the people were nice, but this time the woman acted a little indignant. "Why the hell do you want to do something like that?" she asked. We talked until she said she had other phone calls. But she made me promise I wouldn't try it without calling back first. I had a bottle of Coricidin from a wisdom tooth operation. I'd been thinking about it for a month off and on. Much later that night I took ten Coricidin and went to bed. I woke up in the morning feeling really rotten -- weepy, groggy. I could hardly move I thought I was going to die any minute. My roommate came home and got a friend to drive me to the school infirmary, where they gave me something that made me sick to my stomach. The doctor who gave it to me calmed me down. She said it happens to a lot of people, the pills wouldn't hurt me. I felt tingly, like I might pass out any minute.
I was immediately taken in a wheelchair to the psychiatrist's office. I talked to him about five minutes. He kept yelling ta me about why did I take the pills, why didn't I do this or that. I remember thinking, boy this man is a real jerk. I told him I didn't want to see him any more. He said, "That's fine," and put me in a locked room with bars on the windows. I couldn't make phone calls. I felt humiliated, which made me angry. I'm not crazy. I'm not weird. I don't want people to look at me like I'm nuts. I'm not some nutty kid who tried to knock herself off. I was most angry at being stuck in that room. I expected to be put in a straitjacket any minute. I complained until they moved me a pretty room and let me make phone calls.
I was there about two weeks. My psychiatrist kept harping at me about school -- was I going to stay in or drop out? I saw him ten minutes a day. The other patients and one orderly helped me a lot more than he did. I just wanted to find a place where I could be alone and think about things. I left feeling like not much had been accomplished, except letting me know that I didn't want to attempt it again. No -- I feel like I've become a lot more sensitive to people. I don't look at their problems as trivial any more. I almost like it when my friends come to me with problems. I feel like I can help now. I still haven't told the two people I was most angry at -- my father and my boyfriend -- why I was in the hospital.
so close to home it is unreal..
i keep going because of my friend, maybe these notes will give someone some persepctive like it did me
Seems like a very poor psychyatrist. I've spent some time over at /r/suicidewatch talking to people who need it, and the basic things you should read about before posting there explains how to talk to people with suicidal thoughts. This psychiatrist haden't made a proper evaluation or was just bad at his job.
By now, the news of our defeat has reached the Earth. The creatures we were sent here to tame are untameable... And the colonies we were sent to reclaim have proven to be stronger than we anticipated.
Whatever you may hear about what has happened out here, know this: Alexei did not die a hero. I killed him... my pride killed him. And now my pride has consumed me as well.
You will never see me again, Helena.
Tell our children that I love them, and that their father died in defense of their future.
Au revoir
As sad as this thread is, I laughed pretty damn hard at this.
On April 16 2012 15:31 Jisall wrote: When you go threw shit, you always come out stronger. Its wierd, because most of the things that drive people to suicide are mental conflicts. If you can fight that mental battle and win, then I feel those are some of the strongest people in the world. Physical pain holds no weight in their lives, they have already conquered the mental pain.
I think this is true too. Any idea why the brain does this?
There is a theory on it called "Post Traumatic Growth".
It makes sense in a way. Essentially if you are able to overcome obstacles and work through a very difficult time, you begin to gain resiliency and perspective. Of course this isn't true for everyone, but it does indeed lead to support "What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger".
Contrary to what people say, what drives people to suicide most often is not mental conflicts. It is actually feelings as if you have nothing going on for you, you are a burden to others, and ultimately you feel all alone. This feeling can come from mental conflicts, such as depression, but that feeling of burden and being alone is pretty much the unifying factor in most suicides. It's sad, because in a lot of cases a simple kindness could have probably saved a lot of these people. Reading these suicide letters really drills this point home.
I find it interesting that people try to kill themselves over having a tough time. Seems like PTSD as opposed to MDD.
In case anyone is wondering I tried to kill myself 2 1/2 months ago, I tried to drown myself, my dad caught me, greatest thing that ever happened to me, much happier person now even though i'm apparently developing schizophrenia.
For me it just came down to not having one moment of enjoyment in 5 years, just hating life and everyone.
That point before you go through with it is one of the most euphoric moments I have ever had though, and i'm on drugs that would knock you on your ass for 3 days and some that would have you tweak for 3.
By now, the news of our defeat has reached the Earth. The creatures we were sent here to tame are untameable... And the colonies we were sent to reclaim have proven to be stronger than we anticipated.
Whatever you may hear about what has happened out here, know this: Alexei did not die a hero. I killed him... my pride killed him. And now my pride has consumed me as well.
You will never see me again, Helena.
Tell our children that I love them, and that their father died in defense of their future.
Au revoir
As sad as this thread is, I laughed pretty damn hard at this.
He could have some form of psychosis, you're a sick fucker.
By now, the news of our defeat has reached the Earth. The creatures we were sent here to tame are untameable... And the colonies we were sent to reclaim have proven to be stronger than we anticipated.
Whatever you may hear about what has happened out here, know this: Alexei did not die a hero. I killed him... my pride killed him. And now my pride has consumed me as well.
You will never see me again, Helena.
Tell our children that I love them, and that their father died in defense of their future.
Au revoir
As sad as this thread is, I laughed pretty damn hard at this.
On April 16 2012 15:31 Jisall wrote: When you go threw shit, you always come out stronger. Its wierd, because most of the things that drive people to suicide are mental conflicts. If you can fight that mental battle and win, then I feel those are some of the strongest people in the world. Physical pain holds no weight in their lives, they have already conquered the mental pain.
I think this is true too. Any idea why the brain does this?
There is a theory on it called "Post Traumatic Growth".
It makes sense in a way. Essentially if you are able to overcome obstacles and work through a very difficult time, you begin to gain resiliency and perspective. Of course this isn't true for everyone, but it does indeed lead to support "What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger".
Contrary to what people say, what drives people to suicide most often is not mental conflicts. It is actually feelings as if you have nothing going on for you, you are a burden to others, and ultimately you feel all alone. This feeling can come from mental conflicts, such as depression, but that feeling of burden and being alone is pretty much the unifying factor in most suicides. It's sad, because in a lot of cases a simple kindness could have probably saved a lot of these people. Reading these suicide letters really drills this point home.
Suicide mostly comes from depression, schizophrenia and bi-polar disorder.
Each come from different things.
For example depression comes from the chemical serotonin being sent back into the same nueroreceptors it came from.
That theory is retarded and backed by 0 sound evidence, please use facts next time instead of this unbelievably silly notion.
It was nice reading this thread though. I think everyone contemplates suicide at some point in their lives, it just differs in the degree in which they think about it. Really sad to see so many lives taken though, especially since some of them are so young they couldn't even think for themselves.
On April 16 2012 15:23 MrSkyfire wrote: friend linked me this as i'd been going through some dark things lately.. dno what about it kept me going but it did.. thought i'd share with tl, but i found it with search (dont need to be banned for not search .. last thing i need ..)
Trina, a college student, 21 years old
Fall quarter I called Suicide Prevention. I'd called them before and the people were nice, but this time the woman acted a little indignant. "Why the hell do you want to do something like that?" she asked. We talked until she said she had other phone calls. But she made me promise I wouldn't try it without calling back first. I had a bottle of Coricidin from a wisdom tooth operation. I'd been thinking about it for a month off and on. Much later that night I took ten Coricidin and went to bed. I woke up in the morning feeling really rotten -- weepy, groggy. I could hardly move I thought I was going to die any minute. My roommate came home and got a friend to drive me to the school infirmary, where they gave me something that made me sick to my stomach. The doctor who gave it to me calmed me down. She said it happens to a lot of people, the pills wouldn't hurt me. I felt tingly, like I might pass out any minute.
I was immediately taken in a wheelchair to the psychiatrist's office. I talked to him about five minutes. He kept yelling ta me about why did I take the pills, why didn't I do this or that. I remember thinking, boy this man is a real jerk. I told him I didn't want to see him any more. He said, "That's fine," and put me in a locked room with bars on the windows. I couldn't make phone calls. I felt humiliated, which made me angry. I'm not crazy. I'm not weird. I don't want people to look at me like I'm nuts. I'm not some nutty kid who tried to knock herself off. I was most angry at being stuck in that room. I expected to be put in a straitjacket any minute. I complained until they moved me a pretty room and let me make phone calls.
I was there about two weeks. My psychiatrist kept harping at me about school -- was I going to stay in or drop out? I saw him ten minutes a day. The other patients and one orderly helped me a lot more than he did. I just wanted to find a place where I could be alone and think about things. I left feeling like not much had been accomplished, except letting me know that I didn't want to attempt it again. No -- I feel like I've become a lot more sensitive to people. I don't look at their problems as trivial any more. I almost like it when my friends come to me with problems. I feel like I can help now. I still haven't told the two people I was most angry at -- my father and my boyfriend -- why I was in the hospital.
so close to home it is unreal..
i keep going because of my friend, maybe these notes will give someone some persepctive like it did me
When you go threw shit, you always come out stronger. Its wierd, because most of the things that drive people to suicide are mental conflicts. If you can fight that mental battle and win, then I feel those are some of the strongest people in the world. Physical pain holds no weight in their lives, they have already conquered the mental pain.
I don't think it is weird. Sometimes people just don't have the second chance to restart or fight against these mental conflicts. Sometimes solving one shit leads to even more shit and your whole life is dealing with these shit.
humans are not very good as dealing with modern society (I read about it on a science magazine, there is a small thread about this here:http://www.biology-online.org/biology-forum/about20756.html), we should respect these people rather than judging them
Afterall, we are not them. We haven't had their life experiences, we don't have their personality, we only see and understand things based upon what we know and what we can imagine etc.
By now, the news of our defeat has reached the Earth. The creatures we were sent here to tame are untameable... And the colonies we were sent to reclaim have proven to be stronger than we anticipated.
Whatever you may hear about what has happened out here, know this: Alexei did not die a hero. I killed him... my pride killed him. And now my pride has consumed me as well.
You will never see me again, Helena.
Tell our children that I love them, and that their father died in defense of their future.
Au revoir
As sad as this thread is, I laughed pretty damn hard at this.
what the fuck...
very interesting reading these.
Its the ending to Starcraft broodwar, how do people not know this.... T_T