I decided to make this quick thread to find out how people vent or get over their anger. What I mean is, after a long tough day filled with stupid people and even stupider events, what do you do to calm yourself? What about after a tough fight with a parent or a spouse etc? I simply think it is interesting to see how other people do it.
Personally, after a heated argument or fight, I will usually listen to some comedians, especially my personal hero George Carlin. I usually don't bother trying to play video games, since the games that I prefer are the type that require a large amount of concentration and would make me rage harder. I also might stick in some metal and rock out to some angry music; interestingly, I usually get more calm rather than more agitated when listening to metal. Occasionally, I will watch one of my favorite movies, District 9; it makes me feel so good when he breaks out of the hospital bed, grabs a knife and a doctor and starts screaming, "I'm gonna cut his fucking eyes out!" Ahhhh, takes the anger right out of me.
I slowly let the anger creep to my brain probably giving me a tumor... But seriously I usually work out or play sports, sometimes ill play a game that requires no skill or focues (minecraft, LoL... )
most of the time i sleep it off. chances are, you will realize the next morning that whatever it was that made you extremely angry was rather trivial.
also, i'm a nerd so i end up studying like crazy. although, that's probably more due to the fact that most of the things i'm angry about are related to my performance in school.
Listen to a lot of music, and channel the emotion somewhere else. For example I'm a distance runner, and when I'm angry I push myself a lot harder than when I'm not angry.
I don't... then again I've gotten extremely good at controlling myself that it's rare for me to get angry. IF it ever gets that bad then I immediately jump in my bed and nap~
On January 19 2012 11:11 Erasme wrote: I kill innocent people in skyrim. Then I load my last save because it was too fast and not fun enough :'(
I lol'd at that.
I swear, not too much. Sometimes, when I get REALLY mad, I punch my bed which is right next to me, but that almost never happens. Just the good old "fuck" or "god damnit"
Edit: It's kinda funny, i also swear over the stupidest things. If I simply stub my toe, Ill just mutter "god damnit"
I'm a lot better at managing anger now, but I used to keep soft stuffed animals on my desk so I could throw them. Otherwise I'd throw a harder object and break something. Now I usually drop whatever it is I'm doing, regardless of what it is, and take a walk.
On January 19 2012 10:36 Blardy wrote: I just don't get mad in the first place.
I do that for the most part, but some situations (the very first time I got into an accident because a woman thought she had priority coming out of her driveway) I didn't know how to react because I was late, but unless I have other stuff I have to do, I don't get mad. It's not healthy and you don't think straight. Better off just learning to shrug it off and understand that people are jerks and try to piss you off or they had a bad day and can't control themselves.
Doing some push ups after losing for 3 hours. Not a single fucking win. Went from 16-9 to 18-18. 2 games were because there was someone who was tanking his rank to bronze for farming I assume.
I stop my car in the middle of the 59th Street Bridge and sing "I Feel Pretty" while a crazy old man who is living with me yells at an angry cabbie to "shut your pie hole," informing him that "we're workin' here!"
After finding out i was too late to register for exams (thanks to a broken clock on the university website that is supposed to warn people that the registration is opened) , i started freaking out, walking around and shouting at myself After that i went to a camgirl im friends with and we talked about it , and after that i felt pretty calmed down.
I don't get angry, and when I do I realize it's just a hormonal reaction to not getting my way and I think of other things and quickly calm down. I can't remember the last time I was angry for a legitimate reason, so I usually just assume whatever I'm mad about isn't worth getting mad about, and that helps calm me down as well.
On January 19 2012 11:45 Kurr wrote: Nothing special. My anger never lasts long and it goes away no matter what I do.
I rarely get angry anyway, and it's always for pretty tame reasons so I feel stupid if I stay angry.
Yeah, this is me as well. I can't think of the last time I was actually really angry (like EFFIN' MAD) for more than 5 minutes. Best solution is to listen to Nujabes and just think it off.
For the past 23 years I've bottled my anger and stored in deep in a place no1 not even me can find it. Its worked pretty well so far I don't see a downside to it. Got a great house and an awesome job at the Post Office.
To be honest, if this thread is really legit, well I use to hack a shitload (skript kiddy) when people would beat me on Broodwars(you can thank me for various 'old' hacks like the morph hack[lasted 13 days and then it got patched], masser, various drop hacks), I'd also make brute force programs so brood wars had to get patched to at which point you needed and email to recover your passsword.
Also, lots of 7v1 CompStomp BS'ing. I would pretend I was a Vietnam vet and write things like "back in my day, starcraft was in black and white! Carriers weren't even out yet"
Oh man, makes me want to go back on broodwars and backstab a bunch of randoms. Anyone, I mean anyone who angered me or did anything to me really rocked my world and I can never understand how someone else can make someone feel so shitty and not feel shitty themselves, it's just...
Throwing my keyboard and bashing my mouse against the table helps,I replaced my mouse six times last year along with my LCD screen (just one screen, after battering it into pieces i release that it might not be the best idea to do it twice)
On January 19 2012 11:46 CosmosXAM wrote: I bottle it up and release it at inappropriate times like Thanksgiving and Vikings games.
(+1 to anyone who gets the reference and how true it its)
you are my hero XD
Hurrah! Thats sick that someone got it :D But yea pretty much I just bottle it up, I am a really passive aggressive person, but I never let myself "explode" in front of others I always just try and get out of the conversation or situation that I feel is causing me to get to that point and go just sit and think. I used to get into fights when I got to that point but almost getting charged for assault because I broke a kids nose pretty much made me take a different stance on my anger.
I type out my problems very vaguely and then post it on tumblr, or I type out exactly what I'm feeling and then post it on my private passworded tumblr that no one knows the password to.
The reason punching bags and loud music works is endorphin's. You are more likely to be angry later if you vent out your anger on a bag as opposed to just using music and punching bags as exercise and relaxation.
I am one of the chillest people I know, but that's because I always thought how stupid it was for my brother and other people to get angry over trivial things.
I used to just ragequit starcraft whenever I lost to some all-in, failed my cheese, or lost to some really weird, abnormal build. But now, I really just try and understand more of WHY I lost instead of "RAEG, PROTOSS IS OP. WHAT A NOOB, I COULDA WON THAT GAME." If it's anger in real life, which I haven't gotten since December 18, 2011, I used to just sleep it off with some soothing classical music/gospel. Or I just pray for strength and patience.
On January 19 2012 13:03 Crakalaka wrote: I use to punch walls but that only made my knuckles huge and my pain receptors in my hand are non-existent. . .
I really can't stay mad for more than about 30 seconds. After that I will be so confused about how I could even be mad in the first place when the world is so wonderful.
Nothing calms me more than two things depending on which is more appropriate to the situation. Thing 1) Pet cat a lot Thing 2) Take a walk and lose myself in the beauty of nature
I try and stop thinking about whatever is making me mad and try and laugh with friends, if that doesn't work or I'm not feeling social then I will run and listen to some music.
I don't get angry anymore. I used to a lot when I was a kid, and I learned how to deal with it. I can get frustrated at something or disappointed but never actual anger. It's not worth it. People are dumb and won't admit to their mistakes, don't stoop to their level when they try to drag you in. Avoid drama and surround yourself with positive people and life will be much better. Don't care about what people think about you; if they're judgemental enough to start rumours about you or any of that crap they're not worth your time and by ignoring it you are already a better person than they ever will be. This is how I live my life and it has worked out well the last few years.
My brother used to get way angrier than I ever did when I had anger issues in early elementary school. He once punched a hole straight through the old door leading to our basement when he got mad at me for something. He cut his hand, I laughed. He mellowed out too eventually.
Though, so my post is at least partly on topic, I used to listen to a lot of metal when I was frustrated or mad back a few years ago.
Go for a walk, back when I wasn't lazy as hell I'd actually have a workout once a day and never got stressed by anything. Run and do some cardio for 3 hours a day and the world feels more at ease, really gotta get back into my old habits one of these days.
On January 19 2012 14:40 RaLakedaimon wrote: Go for a walk, back when I wasn't lazy as hell I'd actually have a workout once a day and never got stressed by anything. Run and do some cardio for 3 hours a day and the world feels more at ease, really gotta get back into my old habits one of these days.
Make today that day! Go, go, go!
I go outside. Preferably with a friend. Its nice just to go outside and walk down to the corner store, or coffee shop.
I try to section off my life, sort of compartmentalize or partition it. It's not a good habit, but it's mostly what gets me through and why I seem to "get over" things so quickly. Being mad often makes me wish things were the way before whatever caused that happened. I distract myself, with anything and everything. I think far too much and it's hard to turn my brain off long enough to be at peace with anything at any given time. Instead I fill myself with so much to think about that anger or other negative feelings just don't have any space or time to be considered. Thinking about it suddenly, I suppose this is why I have over 800 videos of various things on youtube, over 500 painted warhammer 40k miniatures, some 300 more assembled warhammer 40k miniatures not painted, bookmarks upon bookmarks of comics backlogged to read, many playlists of music, league of legends, starcraft 2, other games I can simply jump into and play on a whim without much setup or though that require serious attention. Being alone with my own thoughts is my least favorite thing, like this moment for instance typing about it. Lately I've needed much larger, complicated and more grandiose things to point my focus at since recently painting while listening to the Adam Carolla podcast has been failing me. It used to be that movies or video games alone did it. Though I have always been at peace on camera talking to people, recording gameplay, commentating... I suppose behind the camera, and subsequently in that little window it plays back in things are contained. I can look at it and see something positive free from any clouded mind or held anger. I like that little window.
Though, if I can't distract myself even then I get obsessive and take apart the problem then try to reassemble or fix it and hope that I gain enough understanding to be at peace with it. That works sometimes, but if it doesn't I agonize over it until something drastic in any way, good, bad, serious, lucky, or something happens which can overwrite that thought and give me something to replace it. It's always my sincerest hope that it comes quickly.
That was much more than I needed to write and far more detail than I think. I considered not posting this, but I am an author and entertainer. If my thoughts can temporarily occupy another's mind and displace what bothers them than I am successful. You all can use my window too. That's what I make it for. So other people can be happy and at peace.
I suppose this post box is a little window also. No wonder it feels so easy to write in it.
i usually throw the first thing in plain sight. then keep on throwing some more stuff. and if that doesn't work, then i start stuffing myself like a maniac. plus, headbanging metal songs work really nicely as well.....
Seriously, the best way i find to deal with stress is working out. Specifically for me running. Nothing beats running to songs that get you pumped or emotional in one way or another and banging out like 6 miles. You will feel amazing and its a guaranteed stress release.
Other than that if im feeling shitty, stressed, and dont know what to do with myself and running isnt an option for me at the moment, (assuming there is nothing i can do to release the stress right then and there, i mean if your stressing over a paper, do the paper.),
I pop in FF9 and play through it again with rainy mood in the back ground, and toss back a few beers. It makes me a happy panda. Even the soundtrack is awesome. Esto-gaza sacred grounds + rainymood for the win ^__^;; But i grew up loving that game and always played through it when i was going through shit so i cant guarantee its success with anyone else
Ask me 3 years ago i would punch the outside of my house(was still smart enough not to punch a hole in my wall haha) and hurt my hand greatly, the get trashed and pass out listening to some NOFX and descendants in massive stress mode, wake up hung over, puke some, and move on with the day. Not good times. I dont suggest that.
It varies on what im stressing about tho. Like i said if its something dumb like work or a school assignment i just stress, get my shit done and be okay... but i am sure everyone knows there are some things that stress you out that you cant deal with right away, whatever it might be about.
I do not feel angry, it is a very unsatisfying feeling. Once you cut it through the middle you'll see what it's made of and you get a learning experience for free.
I get violently angry. Or at least I used to. I didn't have the best teenage years. :/ But nowadays I listen to relaxing music, like Reflection Eternal by Nujabes and just read a good book or something.
Edit: I also benchpress, since there's a bench readily available in my living room.
On January 19 2012 11:07 Praetorial wrote: Stab/cut myself, hit hard objects, play League of Legends.
Pain and video games, the best anesthetics around.
The whole stabbing / cutting thing is probably not the best way to vent your anger. I would recommend not doing that or getting some help with not doing that. I don't think it leads to good things.
I hold my feelings in and keep the anger for years to come..Oh wait, I'm not a girl trololol
While I am easily annoyed, I actually very rarely get angry, and when I do you don't want to be around. I punch whatevers closest to me. I know its not actually a healthy way to vent the anger, but when I first do get angry, all sense of reason disappears.
Anger feeds itself, making more anger. Self-disciplined mental meditation. Peace comes from within folks. That said, tools can help. Avoid stressors, calm myself, control situation around me or place self into a calming situation. If needs be, I'm willing to use drugs (alcohol, marijuana, w/e), but that's a crutch, and I willingly admit that. However, sometimes I have no choice but to rely on it :p
If I'm seriously raging, I stop, whatever that may be, turn myself off until I have control. After I get to neutral, move forward from that baseline.
Venting is a serious discussion in psychology. What has been found so far is that venting with any sort of violence (even by yourself on a pillow etc) is bad, but listen to music/play instrument and any non violence act is ok.
Training (like lifting) is in the grey area, but many believe it has a good effect.
If I'm REALLY pissed off I'll just sit up in my bed and listen to music putting my headphones as loud as my ears can take it at the time for maybe a couple of hours. I listen to any style of chilled/ambient electronic music, usually Liquid Dubstep, sometimes Drumstep or DnB. It's kind of weird trying to explain it but for liquid dubstep/chillstep in particular the slow movements in the bass makes it almost feel like the music is massaging my brain. This is my favourite song for that reason. If anyone tries to interrupt in that mood, they'll lose something dear to them
If I'm just a bit annoyed at something, I'll probably just bottle it up until I'm alone and do some exercise
I just suppress the anger until it fades. By far the most superior method for dealing with anger since once you've been doing it for long enough you actually don't get mad at the things you would have before. This should be ranked as a top ten life trick because I think it can greatly improve the quality of life for a lot of people.
On January 19 2012 20:01 BleaK_ wrote: Venting is a serious discussion in psychology. What has been found so far is that venting with any sort of violence (even by yourself on a pillow etc) is bad, but listen to music/play instrument and any non violence act is ok.
Training (like lifting) is in the grey area, but many believe it has a good effect.
Source? I beat the shit out of my pillow after playing PvT.
Drumming! blast beats, fast double bass, power beats, anything solid that requires a lot of force.
I'm also a boxer and hitting the bag really helps.
I also play rugby which means I get to smash people free of charge.
Another thing I like to do is go for a long walk with some mean music playing, going for a run is even better actually.
And another really good one, which people over look, is simply screaming, put your head into a pillow, and just let it rip. Seriously, it works a treat. If you can get away with screaming out aloud, even better.
I grab one of those plastic party tables, something like this:
Set it up in the backyard with some chairs and a nice table cloth.
Then I flip that bitch. (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻
And then do some exercises, maybe some pushups and sit-ups. True story. I sound like I'm trolling but I actually flip stuff (chairs, light tables, to a reasonable degree) and just exercise to vent off.
I laugh it off until I feel like its too much... Then it's off to drinking or if the angers against someone.. I go apeshit and just get physical.. if they push me that far Otherwise.. I laugh it off.. laughing is healthy?
Most stuff that makes you angry isn't worth it anyway because you either cannot change it or it isn't really that important. But if there is something i have to deal with i think about the situation and make my mind up what i'm gonna do the next time situation x occurs or how to solve the problem that i have.
The only time i get kinda angry is if iam not able to do something i want to do (beat a stage in a game etc.) - but it's not really anger rather frustration about my own disability. But then i just drop it because it is not important and practice untill i can get it right.
Throw stuff. Once you break something you realize that anger is REALLY just a matter of short moments. If you destroy something (a headset/mouse or just random stuff like plates, glasses etc etc) you quickly realize that your anger meant less than w/e you just destroyed.
But just doing physical stuff works for me. Throwing, yelling, punching stuff... Oh, and cheesing on ladder like a mo-fo
StarCraft II. Relieving stress is the point of having a hobby, isn't it? I also play in guitar a band and write a little bit, but those are double-edged swords, since they are often quite stressful themselves, whereas Starcraft is never stressful since I only look at it as a game. ..
Go for a long run, with some heavy bass music. Go for the Forest Gump style and just run til everything hurts. I suppose its kinda like cutting yourself, only less bloody. And unless your'e a marathon-runner.
When you say you feel better after Lucas (idk his name) stabs the doctor whilst screaming, it's like you're venting your anger through his. That's awesome.
Writing everything down that was frustrating me helps. Usually it's over trivial things so that shows how silly it was to get mad in the first place. If the reasons were viable, I figure out how to fix it.
On January 19 2012 18:23 actionbastrd wrote: I pop in FF9 and play through it again with rainy mood in the back ground, and toss back a few beers. It makes me a happy panda. Even the soundtrack is awesome. Esto-gaza sacred grounds + rainymood for the win ^__^;; But i grew up loving that game and always played through it when i was going through shit so i cant guarantee its success with anyone else
Woah man. What are the odds. I LOVE FF9 -- it's my favourite game of all time, an amazing soundtrack too. It's so weird you should say that cos' I feel exactly the same way. I'm 23 years old but have been starting up new games/playthroughs every year since I was 12.
*edit* Also when I get angry it never really lasts long enough for me to take steps on reducing it. It seems to come and go pretty quickly and before long I'm back to normal.
On January 19 2012 11:54 BandonBanshee wrote: For the past 23 years I've bottled my anger and stored in deep in a place no1 not even me can find it. Its worked pretty well so far I don't see a downside to it. Got a great house and an awesome job at the Post Office.
Idk if no one else noticed this post, but it is full of win! Fantastic, and how are things going at the post office???
It takes a LOT to get me angry and in the past few years I haven't been angry enough for it to not go away within the next 3-5 hours. I usually just lay on my bed looking on the ceiling while listening to some relaxing, happy music though - I also like to punch hard objects when I'm really angry (note this can give you some wounds on your knuckles, and probably worse things if you punch really hard, or if you're just bad at landing a proper punch).
I listen to this ... Instantly calms me down when she starts singing, and I just sit there, feeling my manly tears pressing :3 IT IS JUST SO BEAUTIFUL TO SEE THERE ARE STILL BEAUTIFUL THINGS IN THIS WORLD T_T DON'T JUDGE
90% of the time with anyone's problem there is a person involved so basically there is always a name sticking to why a person is upset.
I use a song called a sense of touch to force out tears(I never knew I could cry!) I only recently learned of this technique with music. FYI music affects me greatly. I also exhaust myself by running or exercising, make sure I eat because after some arguments or whatever I noticed that I become really depressed and have failed to eat at one point was 140lbs as a guy and that's anorexic for my size.
Sometimes I just try not to bother with the other person and I mean really you can cure ignorance but not stupidity, I also stay away from them that helps keep me calm and any lack of interaction with the consistent problem person. Most music helps me but I've noticed that drums/percussion excites me but I found this werid calming effect when I listened to strings most string instruments but specifically Cello music.
Another tactic is that I hang out or surround myself with good enough people who are not retarded and use their brain thus I do no need to vent my anger soo much, and I also tell some people my problems but only people who actually listen because most people are socially fucked and do not know how to respond to someone's anger or plight that they are expressing.
I also stay away from black women because they seem to be the most ignorant lot of women on the planet don't believe me? Ask anyone of my black friends why they don't like black women also ask yourself why you have a shit ton of single parent families consisting of lone females raising the kids. We can say double standards and what not folks but seriously there's a trend going on here and it's not always the male's fault I guarantee it. I blame both parents if anything and not just the women but both need to take a stand and take some responsibility at some point.
Finally I take a comedic if not funny stand point to why I am mad and reverse it and joke about it because it's my stress on the line.
Nah, usually calming down is a hard thing for me, especially after an all in. Most of the times i just quit SC2 and do something else for the rest of the day.
That's awesome, it seem so counter-intuituve, but it actually makes a lot of sense! Well from now on I will be counting to 30 while taking slow deep breaths, seems like the most productive thing to do to form a mindset conducive to playing sc2 without getting flustered by losses (too much at least )
Great article, and yeah when I DO vent I usually just say fuck and god damnit alot than maybe smack my desk a little ( like it has been a bad desk and needs to be punished! ) other times, like when I had $300 stolen from me by an Ex-friend, I have punched big ass holes in walls, or hit a window so hard that I actually broke my pinky >.<
So yeah I try to keep it under control now, try being the operative word!
I never bring anger with me. I get rid of it right there! But if it's woman related I break things like my phone, not their nose, so atleast I have some control :D
Basically any way you can get endorphins into your brain. Exercise, angry/angsty music, "supplements" though not recommended if you're hoping to overcome anger, just a temporary solution =P. Even reading a good book for a little while helps me.
Hahaha.. It is so amazing to me that I saw this. I actually know the person in the video decently well, from being a former Flash Dev / Admin on the site he frequents, we've talked quite a lot actually. I actually remember when he first made that video and removed it off YouTube.
I try to rape some noobs in a game... it often ends with me playing bad because of my mood and everything gets worse.. I have problem gettin' my rage out cause I'm such a calm person
On January 20 2012 03:00 See.Blue wrote: Masturbation and squats.
At the same time?
For me...I scream once and I'm done with it generally.
If it's particularly shitty I shoot things with my gun at the range...and try not to imagine that it's the person that pissed me off. That's probably a bad thing now that I think about it.
I can't really hold on to anger very well. Usually going and doing something else helps me to cool off, it doesn't matter what it is. Just a glass of water and some gaming is fine.
playing LoL does NOT releive my anger/stress but only makes it worse, when ur paired with 4 idiots and you have to surrender at 20. What i usually do is bottle it up and occasionally, maybe once every 6 months or so, murder someone.
Ahhh first time I lost it and started raging in a game of SC2 today. Never thought it'd happen to me, it was just a custom's King of the Hill game too.
Through a combination of my own inattention (lost reaper/4 hellions/2 banshees without killing much), his relentless speedling runbys/backstabs, burrowed roaches and finally a very lucky burrowed baneling hit that killed ~13 marines, I just fucking lost it and started to BM hard than I have ever done so in my life.
Checked APM in SC2gears, it was 220/165 vs 115/90 APM/EAPM in my favor. Granted Terran is my offrace and my timings are far from crisp, but just how fucking easy zerg is at the diamond/low masters level just makes me rage.
I just don't get that angry. People are always telling me, its not good to hold in your anger like that, and indeed it isn't. But I find that I just don't have any anger that needs to be released.
I have a weekly newspaper column and so I usually find a way to politely trash what's making me mad.
Either that or I play against Insane Computer AI on a turtle friendly map, and just defend until I have 20 carriers and then move out and wipe off the face of the earth whatever is bothering me.
I've learned to accept that I will get angry...and then let it go.
There isn't much reason for me to be angry when I'm, more often than not, in the situation voluntarily. I think to myself, "...Matt...you're freakin' stupid for choosing this...but...here you are...suck it up." So I suck it up. Then, when I'm done, I'm happy it's over and I go on with my life.
If it isn't voluntary, I realize I don't have much control over it, and most of the anger is gone.
On January 31 2012 10:22 Ponyo wrote: I rage on certain people who probably don't deserve it. If I ever feel like I am going too far then I simply apologize and explain that I am venting.
Yeah pretty much what happens to me too, although I don't tend to go "too far".. I rather make myself laugh at others expense I suppose - what a bastard I am. :p
Kinda' the good thing about the internet, most people really don't take it seriously - no matter what's said.
I watch youtube videos about reviews of random electronics like GPUs/CPUs/really kick ass looking cases. I guess I try to replace my anger with thoughts of things that interest me. I also like to play CS:S or Battlefield 3, something that isn't really too competitive and blast dubstep/drum and bass.
metal and working out. The music just helps me channel it out and just 'be' angry, instead of being pissed off at something specific, and the physical work just gives it an outlet.
Oh man the Donkey Kong Country theme brings back some memories!
I have a real problem dealing with my anger after losing a match... especially after being cheesed. I say things I definitely wouldn't say in normal circumstances. In fact, one of my new years resolutions was to be less BM!
well if its video game rage i usually get some well needed yelling done and a little sporatic flailing. I click find match while still pissed off and rinse lather repeat;] haha
Probably sounds facetious but I go and make myself tea (a simple cha no yu; I've complete equipment: chawan, chasen, chashaku and natsume) and have some wagashi in the garden. I rarely get angry though
One thing I've started to do, I think this was suggested earlier in the thread, is punch myself really hard in leg. Usually snaps me out of any temporary rage, and gives me an endorphin rush too. Unhealthy, I know, but it works.
I usually just grab a cold drink, lay back in my chair with my feet up and watch a tv show or just browse the web. I don't get very angry, and I get over things pretty quickly.
In my younger days I used to use alcohol and drugs. Now days I go for a very long run. Running or exercising regularly causes your brain to release the same chemicals it releases when smoking weed. http://www.cnn.com/2004/HEALTH/01/11/marijuana.exercise.reut/
On February 02 2012 13:05 i_am_immure wrote: In my younger days I used to use alcohol and drugs. Now days I go for a very long run. Running or exercising regularly causes your brain to release the same chemicals it releases when smoking weed. http://www.cnn.com/2004/HEALTH/01/11/marijuana.exercise.reut/
i wait for an hour after i have calmed down and i try to look at it objectively. if i am still angry, i ask friends if i have the right to be angry, and if i don't i try to move on. in the worst case scenario i will simply watch streams, or youtube, or netflix to calm me down
I lift weights to Death Metal. That's part of the problem these days; back in the time of the Vikings, you could just go around raping and pillaging to vent.
Hit the table, do some pushups or shadowboxing. When you get angry, your body reacts by pumping adrenaline and stuff, and it's way heathlier to just let it out immediately.
For the everyday anger about the madness of the world: Basketball and weed.
Punch my mattress, do some push-ups, and play chess (lol). Usually in that order.
Not sure why, but blitz chess is a great outlet for me since it requires both constant movement of my mouse hand and constant thinking which keeps my mind from being angry.
say i just lost a couple ladder game and feel angry about my play and stuff. I usually quit, go workout and put all my frustration into a great workout. sometimes I just hit the wall/desk with all strenght... its really releaving but i don't think destroying things( I have made holes in my walls with my fists) is the right way....
depends... if i get angry while at home i just blast good music and kill stuff in video games... if its outside i either walk it off, just stand there and murder everyone arround me in my mind, yell a couple swear words or just punch something... tho its notmally just me doing mass slaughter in my mind... its just so soothing o.o
I used to rage alottt when i played in diamond. any cheese would make me so angry. But now I know that it isn't worth it and I play better when I don't rage. Sometimes I get annoyed, but I always gg now.
Usually I dime everything on my jcm800, tune my les paul to drop c and get my shred on. It sucks when I'm angry because then I play sloppy because I'm all tense. But damn if it isn't fun.
Or I'll go run. This works the best because it physically exhausts me quickly(more so than the below).
Or have angry sex.
Or I'll go on a run that ends up at my friends house for said angry sex since she lives kinda close.
On February 02 2012 13:05 i_am_immure wrote: In my younger days I used to use alcohol and drugs. Now days I go for a very long run. Running or exercising regularly causes your brain to release the same chemicals it releases when smoking weed. http://www.cnn.com/2004/HEALTH/01/11/marijuana.exercise.reut/
Firing up a toke sounds alot easier yo.
Yeah, it definitely is alot easier. But these days I prefer a clear head.
try this the next time you are extremely PO'd... Go somewhere alone, flex every muscle in your body at the same time as hard as you can for 10 seconds...
I've always been a fan of combat sports. I took up MMA a few years back and even fought on a semi pro level. I don't recommend actually training with another person when you are mad but doing a lot of the exercises with it helps a lot. Hit the heavy bag, practice kicks. My personal favorite is beating a tire with a sledgehammer.
I type up long responses to threads, then delete them. Or I meditate. Occasionally, where neither of those are options I bottleup my emotions for a while then see if I feel differently when some time has passed. Even if I don't, I'm usually in a position to respond rationally or meditate by then anyway.
Was trying to beat Veteran in World at War. Got so mad at one of the last missions with the flame thrower in Japan. I threw the empty case at the call. It was my first, and so far my only out burst of rage. Other than that I used to play WoW. Decided to play some Sc2. Misplaced a spine with hatch first vs bunker rush 11/11 rax. Stoped playing Sc2 for 1 month, and started to play WoW again, and was 100% convinced terran is op. It was OP at that stage of the game, bunkers were still free.
For venting anger I just try to let it go. Watch some TV, chores and exercise. Something to take my mind off the inconvenience of the source of the anger.
I strive to control and master my emotions rather than letting them affect my thinking and actions. It is really hard work but I've learned how to dismantle anger before it manifests itself in the first place.
On March 10 2012 07:56 Magic_Mike wrote: I've always been a fan of combat sports. I took up MMA a few years back and even fought on a semi pro level. I don't recommend actually training with another person when you are mad but doing a lot of the exercises with it helps a lot. Hit the heavy bag, practice kicks. My personal favorite is beating a tire with a sledgehammer.
Not very well. I bottle it up which puts me in a bad/depressed mood which usually ends up searching the internet for anime artwork with soul-crushingly depressing / lonely themes late into the night when I should be sleeping. This contributes to me avoiding society interaction any more than what is absolutely required (probably not a good thing to do).
On March 28 2012 12:28 ArmyOfPlatypi wrote: I Youtube search random Whose Line Is It Anyway, and let the laughs take me away.
There is a actually a website called WhoseLineOnline.org that has every episode of Whose Line, both the US and UK versions, embedded from youtube. I use it to calm myself down as well.
I ask myself: "Does this matter in an hour? Does this matter in a day? A week? A month? A year?" Chances are no, it won't, so I go back to focusing on positive things.
I guess what I do is try to put perspective on my situation and judge whether or not the anger I'm feeling is truly warranted. Most often, I find that it simply is not worth using all that energy on being mad, when in the grand scheme of things it doesn't matter at all.
When I'm justifiably mad, I tend to rant at someone (friend, family member, random Facebook person who is online, etc) until I say what I need to say and just get it out of my system. Being mad or angry is often times because you are holding onto something in a negative way and need to let it go.
On March 28 2012 12:28 ArmyOfPlatypi wrote: I Youtube search random Whose Line Is It Anyway, and let the laughs take me away.
There is a actually a website called WhoseLineOnline.org that has every episode of Whose Line, both the US and UK versions, embedded from youtube. I use it to calm myself down as well.
Mumble to myself something like "that fucking retard" (in own language) and forget the whole thing in 10sec. It's a good thing that the anger doesn't last long on me
On March 28 2012 12:55 Ouga wrote: Mumble to myself something like "that fucking retard" (in own language) and forget the whole thing in 10sec. It's a good thing that the anger doesn't last long on me
Would you mind posting the translation/ transliteration of "that fucking retard" in your own language (Finnish? another language?) so I could repeat it whenever I get mad after a game, as this would probably make me laugh out loud and make me feel better? ^^
On March 28 2012 12:22 Cheticus wrote: Watch my little pony friendship is magic.
I don't really get angry easily, I can't remember the last time I've been genuinely angry, but if I did, I'd do this. It certainly works very well at cheering me up when I'm feeling down.
On March 28 2012 12:55 Ouga wrote: Mumble to myself something like "that fucking retard" (in own language) and forget the whole thing in 10sec. It's a good thing that the anger doesn't last long on me
Would you mind posting the translation/ transliteration of "that fucking retard" in your own language (Finnish? another language?) so I could repeat it whenever I get mad after a game, as this would probably make me laugh out loud and make me feel better? ^^
Anger is a decision, you can either get angry and solve nothing or handle the situation with reason. Simple choice really, you only live this life once.
Hit the gym and take it out on some weights - usually these are the times I'm extra loud, dropping plates, grunting on a couple reps, etc. etc.
Sports don't really help me - I play rugby, but I'm not great at wrapping up my tackles, so most often I find myself to be the reason my team gets scored on, and that makes me more angry. Doing drills, or conditioning work though - simple, repetitive things does help quite a bit.
So long story short, I need something physical, that I can either focus my entire attention on, or else completely zone out with.
Did you know that when you get angry you actually improve your capacity of objectively analizing your problem.
When angry people do stupid things, (like kill a wife because shes cheating on you) its because in his sick mind he has placed the blame of the problem on the wrong target, and seeks an immediate solution.
This is something I've always found interesting, because I rarely have enough anger to vent.
To answer the thread, I live with my best friend of .. something like 16 years as a roommate, and even when I didn't live with him really, I just end up talking to him for anywhere from 5-8 hours into the night. We used to do it at our spot in town, but now that we live together we can just do it in the living room. We casually drink and keep a buzz going and just discuss everything that's annoyed us in the past two or three months for hours, and then it's over.
I don't ever raise my voice, I don't ever hit things, I don't ever throw things, I point most failure inward and build up a knowledge base to improve upon. My brother's do, but I think I'm far too much like my father, who even in the shittiest of situations with my brothers who royally fuck up, he never raises his voice (unless he sees a spider, then shit gets real) and is super calm about everything.
I get annoyed a lot about little things, and I go on a lot of rants, but it's more for the people around me's enjoyment. I can make crowds laugh about annoying things people do that bother me, but the level of frustration I display is a lot higher than I actually feel.
It also helps that right now I live in a really beautiful town with a mountain range 15 minutes away, so any negativity can be brought there. It's pretty hard to be angry with the freshest soil beneath your feet, the freshest air to breathe, when you can see 5 different states from where you're standing, when you can see the topography of the area so perfectly.
I observe people who get angry about things they have no control over, and it's like, why bro?
Pro-tips: Meditate once a day, just go somewhere by yourself and zone out for half an hour. Think about stuff, don't think about stuff, just spend like 30-40 minutes by yourself doing nothing.
Spend 21 days straight writing down 3 positive things that happened each day, but you can't repeat any one positive thing. This is really easy at first, but after a few days or a week, it's tough to think of something positive that you haven't written down yet. This will help train your brain to actively search for the positive things in your life instead of negative ones.
Try to perform a random act of kindness each day. At least one. Go out of your way to hold the door for someone, tell a cashier that they're looking handsome/pretty today, tell someone at work they're doing a good job, etc. I remember about 4 years ago when I was college searching with my dad we were leaving this building, he went through the door first, then me, and he stopped and ran back to hold the door because I didn't for the person behind me. We ended up holding the door for about a train of 30 people. Afterwards we were walking and he just said to me, "Always hold the door, it's the foundation of human kindness." And for the past 4 years I've never not held the door for anyone/everyone walking through.
I know that's somewhat off-topic, but really, there's a problem with the world where a lot of people just aren't happy on a daily basis. Being happy affects you positively in literally every way possible, and it's relevant because really, truly being happy completely circumvents being angry and having the need to vent your anger in the first place.
On March 28 2012 15:10 D10 wrote: Did you know that when you get angry you actually improve your capacity of objectively analizing your problem.
When angry people do stupid things, (like kill a wife because shes cheating on you) its because in his sick mind he has placed the blame of the problem on the wrong target, and seeks an immediate solution.
Usually people perform better when angry
I think you'll find that it's the people whom are difficult to anger in the first place that will perform well under anger.
On March 28 2012 15:10 D10 wrote: Did you know that when you get angry you actually improve your capacity of objectively analizing your problem.
When angry people do stupid things, (like kill a wife because shes cheating on you) its because in his sick mind he has placed the blame of the problem on the wrong target, and seeks an immediate solution.
Usually people perform better when angry
The first sentence here seems to contradict the second and then agree with the third. I don't really follow.
On March 28 2012 15:10 D10 wrote: Did you know that when you get angry you actually improve your capacity of objectively analizing your problem.
When angry people do stupid things, (like kill a wife because shes cheating on you) its because in his sick mind he has placed the blame of the problem on the wrong target, and seeks an immediate solution.
Usually people perform better when angry
The first sentence here seems to contradict the second and then agree with the third. I don't really follow.
omg our names are similar. responded to same post at virtually the same time. just wanted to note the fact
On March 28 2012 15:10 D10 wrote: Did you know that when you get angry you actually improve your capacity of objectively analizing your problem.
When angry people do stupid things, (like kill a wife because shes cheating on you) its because in his sick mind he has placed the blame of the problem on the wrong target, and seeks an immediate solution.
Usually people perform better when angry
The first sentence here seems to contradict the second and then agree with the third. I don't really follow.
What i mean is that problems managing anger doesnt mean it doesnt improve your hability to solve your problem
its just that those people thing bashing people in the skull is a valid solution to their problem. not everyone will act this way, and regardless of the specific decision, being angry increases your capacity of objetively analying situations, patterns, puzzles, etc.
On March 28 2012 15:10 D10 wrote: Did you know that when you get angry you actually improve your capacity of objectively analizing your problem.
When angry people do stupid things, (like kill a wife because shes cheating on you) its because in his sick mind he has placed the blame of the problem on the wrong target, and seeks an immediate solution.
Usually people perform better when angry
The first sentence here seems to contradict the second and then agree with the third. I don't really follow.
What i mean is that problems managing anger doesnt mean it doesnt improve your hability to solve your problem
its just that those people thing bashing people in the skull is a valid solution to their problem. not everyone will act this way, and regardless of the specific decision, being angry increases your capacity of objetively analying situations, patterns, puzzles, etc.
I don't think you know what the word objective means XD. I would say that is empirically untrue though, partially because the example you're giving contradicts that people think more objectively about things and kind of kills what you're trying to say, but I would agree with the other Kich that people who handle anger better are probably more applicable to what you're talking about.
I for instance, as being someone who rarely gets angry, perform better at most tasks under pressure or frustration. If being a pro-gamer wasn't -quite- so unreliable and boring I would likely be doing that right now.
On March 28 2012 15:10 D10 wrote: Did you know that when you get angry you actually improve your capacity of objectively analizing your problem.
When angry people do stupid things, (like kill a wife because shes cheating on you) its because in his sick mind he has placed the blame of the problem on the wrong target, and seeks an immediate solution.
Usually people perform better when angry
The first sentence here seems to contradict the second and then agree with the third. I don't really follow.
What i mean is that problems managing anger doesnt mean it doesnt improve your hability to solve your problem
its just that those people thing bashing people in the skull is a valid solution to their problem. not everyone will act this way, and regardless of the specific decision, being angry increases your capacity of objetively analying situations, patterns, puzzles, etc.
Provide a source for that info.... experience in life proves quite the contrary.
On March 28 2012 12:28 ArmyOfPlatypi wrote: I Youtube search random Whose Line Is It Anyway, and let the laughs take me away.
There is a actually a website called WhoseLineOnline.org that has every episode of Whose Line, both the US and UK versions, embedded from youtube. I use it to calm myself down as well.
i smoke.. alot of cannabinoids. if i lose a game where im really just blindly pissed off, usually i find if i i smoke a bowl by the time im done i realize what really happened and put it in perspective. thats really the only thing truly calms me down
failing that, shutting down threads at a website of mine for people having an open debate and calling them bigots for not thinking the answer is the answer I want them to think.
The reality is, The more you "vent" or express anger, the easier it is to do so in the future. The only way to diminish current and future anger is to let it go.
there's a western belief that holdiong in anger isnt good,a nd that its healthier to let it out. yet anger and actions while in a state of anger usually always lead to negative consequences. In the long run, anger diminishes if you do not express it all the time, but it also requires a mindset that anger in itself is a negative thing to have. If you think of just controlling your anger but still allow yourself to be angry inside all the time, you will pop. there is an important difference in "containing anger and harboring it" and in "letting go of it".
On March 28 2012 15:10 D10 wrote: Did you know that when you get angry you actually improve your capacity of objectively analizing your problem.
When angry people do stupid things, (like kill a wife because shes cheating on you) its because in his sick mind he has placed the blame of the problem on the wrong target, and seeks an immediate solution.
Usually people perform better when angry
The first sentence here seems to contradict the second and then agree with the third. I don't really follow.
What i mean is that problems managing anger doesnt mean it doesnt improve your hability to solve your problem
its just that those people thing bashing people in the skull is a valid solution to their problem. not everyone will act this way, and regardless of the specific decision, being angry increases your capacity of objetively analying situations, patterns, puzzles, etc.
Provide a source for that info.... experience in life proves quite the contrary.
Thats because you rarely find yourself in positions where you are angry and in full power to do something about it, leading to frustration and fury
On March 28 2012 15:10 D10 wrote: Did you know that when you get angry you actually improve your capacity of objectively analizing your problem.
When angry people do stupid things, (like kill a wife because shes cheating on you) its because in his sick mind he has placed the blame of the problem on the wrong target, and seeks an immediate solution.
Usually people perform better when angry
The first sentence here seems to contradict the second and then agree with the third. I don't really follow.
What i mean is that problems managing anger doesnt mean it doesnt improve your hability to solve your problem
its just that those people thing bashing people in the skull is a valid solution to their problem. not everyone will act this way, and regardless of the specific decision, being angry increases your capacity of objetively analying situations, patterns, puzzles, etc.
Provide a source for that info.... experience in life proves quite the contrary.
Thats because you rarely find yourself in positions where you are angry and in full power to do something about it, leading to frustration and fury
if by "full power" you mean, you have the means to do something illegal or sociopathic like do whatever you want to get your ends, and you feel like you COULD KILL SOMEONE at any given moment, there is no person in the world who doesn't have "full power to do something about any situation to the fullest extent of their ability". however, There are these things called morals and laws (which are threats of punishment) which are designed to make people want to choose some other way of dealing with a situation.
the entirety of your posts are logical disconnects and contradictions.
On March 28 2012 15:10 D10 wrote: Did you know that when you get angry you actually improve your capacity of objectively analizing your problem.
When angry people do stupid things, (like kill a wife because shes cheating on you) its because in his sick mind he has placed the blame of the problem on the wrong target, and seeks an immediate solution.
Usually people perform better when angry
The first sentence here seems to contradict the second and then agree with the third. I don't really follow.
What i mean is that problems managing anger doesnt mean it doesnt improve your hability to solve your problem
its just that those people thing bashing people in the skull is a valid solution to their problem. not everyone will act this way, and regardless of the specific decision, being angry increases your capacity of objetively analying situations, patterns, puzzles, etc.
Provide a source for that info.... experience in life proves quite the contrary.
Thats because you rarely find yourself in positions where you are angry and in full power to do something about it, leading to frustration and fury
if by "full power" you mean, you have the means to do something illegal or sociopathic like do whatever you want to get your ends, and you feel like you COULD KILL SOMEONE at any given moment, there is no person in the world who doesn't have "full power to do something about any situation to the fullest extent of their ability". however, There are these things called morals and laws (which are threats of punishment) which are designed to make people want to choose some other way of dealing with a situation.
the entirety of your posts are logical disconnects and contradictions.
You obviously didnt understand it, had nothing to do with what I said.
heres an example of a normal everyday situation, you are working on an essay, your pc crashes and you lose half an hour of work, you get pissed, nothing you can do, just redo the work, you will most likely work on a better rhythm for the next hour
what I meant is that things that usually get people angry usually involve some sort of variable they cant control, they attack things they associate the problem (this is an example to people who lose it when they are angry, not everyone)
my sources are at this moment in portuguese and printed in front of me =/
On March 28 2012 15:10 D10 wrote: Did you know that when you get angry you actually improve your capacity of objectively analizing your problem.
When angry people do stupid things, (like kill a wife because shes cheating on you) its because in his sick mind he has placed the blame of the problem on the wrong target, and seeks an immediate solution.
Usually people perform better when angry
The first sentence here seems to contradict the second and then agree with the third. I don't really follow.
What i mean is that problems managing anger doesnt mean it doesnt improve your hability to solve your problem
its just that those people thing bashing people in the skull is a valid solution to their problem. not everyone will act this way, and regardless of the specific decision, being angry increases your capacity of objetively analying situations, patterns, puzzles, etc.
Provide a source for that info.... experience in life proves quite the contrary.
Thats because you rarely find yourself in positions where you are angry and in full power to do something about it, leading to frustration and fury
Anger is the lack of a solution to a problem in the first place. Being in a position that you can't cope with at that moment(every problem has a solution) will not always lead to frustration and fury, because not everyone has the stance of needing to solve something right now.
On March 28 2012 15:10 D10 wrote: Did you know that when you get angry you actually improve your capacity of objectively analizing your problem.
When angry people do stupid things, (like kill a wife because shes cheating on you) its because in his sick mind he has placed the blame of the problem on the wrong target, and seeks an immediate solution.
Usually people perform better when angry
The first sentence here seems to contradict the second and then agree with the third. I don't really follow.
What i mean is that problems managing anger doesnt mean it doesnt improve your hability to solve your problem
its just that those people thing bashing people in the skull is a valid solution to their problem. not everyone will act this way, and regardless of the specific decision, being angry increases your capacity of objetively analying situations, patterns, puzzles, etc.
Provide a source for that info.... experience in life proves quite the contrary.
Thats because you rarely find yourself in positions where you are angry and in full power to do something about it, leading to frustration and fury
if by "full power" you mean, you have the means to do something illegal or sociopathic like do whatever you want to get your ends, and you feel like you COULD KILL SOMEONE at any given moment, there is no person in the world who doesn't have "full power to do something about any situation to the fullest extent of their ability". however, There are these things called morals and laws (which are threats of punishment) which are designed to make people want to choose some other way of dealing with a situation.
the entirety of your posts are logical disconnects and contradictions.
You obviously didnt understand it, had nothing to do with what I said.
heres an example of a normal everyday situation, you are working on an essay, your pc crashes and you lose half an hour of work, you get pissed, nothing you can do, just redo the work, you will most likely work on a better rhythm for the next hour
what I meant is that things that usually get people angry usually involve some sort of variable they cant control, they attack things they associate the problem (this is an example to people who lose it when they are angry, not everyone)
my sources are at this moment in portuguese and printed in front of me =/
what you said previous involved anger, murder, and, full power to do something about it. I worked with what you gave me to form a response. If it was not at all what you meant, then either Im deranged or you didn't communicate what you were really thinking.
your pc crashes and you lose half an hour of work, you get pissed, nothing you can do, just redo the work, you will most likely work on a better rhythm for the next hour
I'll fix your post
your pc crashes and you lose half an hour of work, you get pissed, so you do what is under your full power to do, just redo the work, you will most likely work on a better rhythm for the next hour
Now, you're trying to associate a better rhythm with anger. But the real association should be that you A. LEARNED that an error of this nature could force you to take longer at a task, and B. try to prevent a similar error in the future being as destructive later on.
this has nothing to do with anger, as anger is NOT involved in the learning process. open up wiki and search for anger and see the brain parts it comes from. Those parts are not associated with problem solving.
if you have a "source" extolling the virtues of anger to learning, they're incorrectly correlating the emotion with the correcting of an issue before the issue becomes a problem.
Learning to save every 5 minutes doesn't come from anger, it comes from problem solving. Anger does not help you solve problems, anger SHUTS DOWN processes in the frontal lobes, the logic centers of our brain. This has been proven for pretty much the entire existence of psychology.
On March 28 2012 15:10 D10 wrote: Did you know that when you get angry you actually improve your capacity of objectively analizing your problem.
When angry people do stupid things, (like kill a wife because shes cheating on you) its because in his sick mind he has placed the blame of the problem on the wrong target, and seeks an immediate solution.
Usually people perform better when angry
The first sentence here seems to contradict the second and then agree with the third. I don't really follow.
What i mean is that problems managing anger doesnt mean it doesnt improve your hability to solve your problem
its just that those people thing bashing people in the skull is a valid solution to their problem. not everyone will act this way, and regardless of the specific decision, being angry increases your capacity of objetively analying situations, patterns, puzzles, etc.
Provide a source for that info.... experience in life proves quite the contrary.
Thats because you rarely find yourself in positions where you are angry and in full power to do something about it, leading to frustration and fury
if by "full power" you mean, you have the means to do something illegal or sociopathic like do whatever you want to get your ends, and you feel like you COULD KILL SOMEONE at any given moment, there is no person in the world who doesn't have "full power to do something about any situation to the fullest extent of their ability". however, There are these things called morals and laws (which are threats of punishment) which are designed to make people want to choose some other way of dealing with a situation.
the entirety of your posts are logical disconnects and contradictions.
You obviously didnt understand it, had nothing to do with what I said.
heres an example of a normal everyday situation, you are working on an essay, your pc crashes and you lose half an hour of work, you get pissed, nothing you can do, just redo the work, you will most likely work on a better rhythm for the next hour
what I meant is that things that usually get people angry usually involve some sort of variable they cant control, they attack things they associate the problem (this is an example to people who lose it when they are angry, not everyone)
my sources are at this moment in portuguese and printed in front of me =/
On March 28 2012 15:10 D10 wrote: Did you know that when you get angry you actually improve your capacity of objectively analizing your problem.
When angry people do stupid things, (like kill a wife because shes cheating on you) its because in his sick mind he has placed the blame of the problem on the wrong target, and seeks an immediate solution.
Usually people perform better when angry
The first sentence here seems to contradict the second and then agree with the third. I don't really follow.
What i mean is that problems managing anger doesnt mean it doesnt improve your hability to solve your problem
its just that those people thing bashing people in the skull is a valid solution to their problem. not everyone will act this way, and regardless of the specific decision, being angry increases your capacity of objetively analying situations, patterns, puzzles, etc.
Provide a source for that info.... experience in life proves quite the contrary.
Thats because you rarely find yourself in positions where you are angry and in full power to do something about it, leading to frustration and fury
if by "full power" you mean, you have the means to do something illegal or sociopathic like do whatever you want to get your ends, and you feel like you COULD KILL SOMEONE at any given moment, there is no person in the world who doesn't have "full power to do something about any situation to the fullest extent of their ability". however, There are these things called morals and laws (which are threats of punishment) which are designed to make people want to choose some other way of dealing with a situation.
the entirety of your posts are logical disconnects and contradictions.
You obviously didnt understand it, had nothing to do with what I said.
heres an example of a normal everyday situation, you are working on an essay, your pc crashes and you lose half an hour of work, you get pissed, nothing you can do, just redo the work, you will most likely work on a better rhythm for the next hour
what I meant is that things that usually get people angry usually involve some sort of variable they cant control, they attack things they associate the problem (this is an example to people who lose it when they are angry, not everyone)
my sources are at this moment in portuguese and printed in front of me =/
But that argument is extremely flawed. Why would a reasonable person get angry over something they can't control? There's no point. Either acknowledge that the problem can't be solved, or find a way to fix it, in this case that would be to invent something that makes a computer less likely to or stop crashing at all. I think it's more likely that someone would get angry over something they can control, because not having the answer when you know there is one implies lack of understanding or thought.
On March 28 2012 15:10 D10 wrote: Did you know that when you get angry you actually improve your capacity of objectively analizing your problem.
When angry people do stupid things, (like kill a wife because shes cheating on you) its because in his sick mind he has placed the blame of the problem on the wrong target, and seeks an immediate solution.
Usually people perform better when angry
The first sentence here seems to contradict the second and then agree with the third. I don't really follow.
What i mean is that problems managing anger doesnt mean it doesnt improve your hability to solve your problem
its just that those people thing bashing people in the skull is a valid solution to their problem. not everyone will act this way, and regardless of the specific decision, being angry increases your capacity of objetively analying situations, patterns, puzzles, etc.
Provide a source for that info.... experience in life proves quite the contrary.
Thats because you rarely find yourself in positions where you are angry and in full power to do something about it, leading to frustration and fury
if by "full power" you mean, you have the means to do something illegal or sociopathic like do whatever you want to get your ends, and you feel like you COULD KILL SOMEONE at any given moment, there is no person in the world who doesn't have "full power to do something about any situation to the fullest extent of their ability". however, There are these things called morals and laws (which are threats of punishment) which are designed to make people want to choose some other way of dealing with a situation.
the entirety of your posts are logical disconnects and contradictions.
You obviously didnt understand it, had nothing to do with what I said.
heres an example of a normal everyday situation, you are working on an essay, your pc crashes and you lose half an hour of work, you get pissed, nothing you can do, just redo the work, you will most likely work on a better rhythm for the next hour
what I meant is that things that usually get people angry usually involve some sort of variable they cant control, they attack things they associate the problem (this is an example to people who lose it when they are angry, not everyone)
my sources are at this moment in portuguese and printed in front of me =/
But that argument is extremely flawed. Why would a reasonable person get angry over something they can't control? There's no point. Either acknowledge that the problem can't be solved, or find a way to fix it, in this case that would be to invent something that makes a computer less likely to or stop crashing at all. I think it's more likely that someone would get angry over something they can control, because not having the answer when you know there is one implies lack of understanding or thought.
most of the human condition is getting angry at things we have no control over. thats where any and all anger comes from. Such as the anger at someone who kills someone you love. Thus sayeth the buddha and Dalai Lamas.
On March 28 2012 15:10 D10 wrote: Did you know that when you get angry you actually improve your capacity of objectively analizing your problem.
When angry people do stupid things, (like kill a wife because shes cheating on you) its because in his sick mind he has placed the blame of the problem on the wrong target, and seeks an immediate solution.
Usually people perform better when angry
The first sentence here seems to contradict the second and then agree with the third. I don't really follow.
What i mean is that problems managing anger doesnt mean it doesnt improve your hability to solve your problem
its just that those people thing bashing people in the skull is a valid solution to their problem. not everyone will act this way, and regardless of the specific decision, being angry increases your capacity of objetively analying situations, patterns, puzzles, etc.
Provide a source for that info.... experience in life proves quite the contrary.
Thats because you rarely find yourself in positions where you are angry and in full power to do something about it, leading to frustration and fury
if by "full power" you mean, you have the means to do something illegal or sociopathic like do whatever you want to get your ends, and you feel like you COULD KILL SOMEONE at any given moment, there is no person in the world who doesn't have "full power to do something about any situation to the fullest extent of their ability". however, There are these things called morals and laws (which are threats of punishment) which are designed to make people want to choose some other way of dealing with a situation.
the entirety of your posts are logical disconnects and contradictions.
You obviously didnt understand it, had nothing to do with what I said.
heres an example of a normal everyday situation, you are working on an essay, your pc crashes and you lose half an hour of work, you get pissed, nothing you can do, just redo the work, you will most likely work on a better rhythm for the next hour
what I meant is that things that usually get people angry usually involve some sort of variable they cant control, they attack things they associate the problem (this is an example to people who lose it when they are angry, not everyone)
my sources are at this moment in portuguese and printed in front of me =/
But that argument is extremely flawed. Why would a reasonable person get angry over something they can't control? There's no point. Either acknowledge that the problem can't be solved, or find a way to fix it, in this case that would be to invent something that makes a computer less likely to or stop crashing at all. I think it's more likely that someone would get angry over something they can control, because not having the answer when you know there is one implies lack of understanding or thought.
most of the human condition is getting angry at things we have no control over. thats where any and all anger comes from. Such as the anger at someone who kills someone you love. Thus sayeth the buddha and Dalai Lamas.
Are you assuming that you can only be angry at the person that kills someone you love?
On March 28 2012 15:10 D10 wrote: Did you know that when you get angry you actually improve your capacity of objectively analizing your problem.
When angry people do stupid things, (like kill a wife because shes cheating on you) its because in his sick mind he has placed the blame of the problem on the wrong target, and seeks an immediate solution.
Usually people perform better when angry
The first sentence here seems to contradict the second and then agree with the third. I don't really follow.
What i mean is that problems managing anger doesnt mean it doesnt improve your hability to solve your problem
its just that those people thing bashing people in the skull is a valid solution to their problem. not everyone will act this way, and regardless of the specific decision, being angry increases your capacity of objetively analying situations, patterns, puzzles, etc.
Provide a source for that info.... experience in life proves quite the contrary.
Thats because you rarely find yourself in positions where you are angry and in full power to do something about it, leading to frustration and fury
if by "full power" you mean, you have the means to do something illegal or sociopathic like do whatever you want to get your ends, and you feel like you COULD KILL SOMEONE at any given moment, there is no person in the world who doesn't have "full power to do something about any situation to the fullest extent of their ability". however, There are these things called morals and laws (which are threats of punishment) which are designed to make people want to choose some other way of dealing with a situation.
the entirety of your posts are logical disconnects and contradictions.
You obviously didnt understand it, had nothing to do with what I said.
heres an example of a normal everyday situation, you are working on an essay, your pc crashes and you lose half an hour of work, you get pissed, nothing you can do, just redo the work, you will most likely work on a better rhythm for the next hour
what I meant is that things that usually get people angry usually involve some sort of variable they cant control, they attack things they associate the problem (this is an example to people who lose it when they are angry, not everyone)
my sources are at this moment in portuguese and printed in front of me =/
But that argument is extremely flawed. Why would a reasonable person get angry over something they can't control? There's no point. Either acknowledge that the problem can't be solved, or find a way to fix it, in this case that would be to invent something that makes a computer less likely to or stop crashing at all. I think it's more likely that someone would get angry over something they can control, because not having the answer when you know there is one implies lack of understanding or thought.
most of the human condition is getting angry at things we have no control over. thats where any and all anger comes from. Such as the anger at someone who kills someone you love. Thus sayeth the buddha and Dalai Lamas.
Are you assuming that you can only be angry at the person that kills someone you love?
Im explaining, not assuming, that anger is a reaction towards situations outside our control. Even anger towards self at failing something. if we did something and failed and felt anger about it, we did everything in our control to succeed, yet did not, therefore our phsyics calculations our brain performed must not have been accurate (in the case of sports), or some other part of our intellect or something outside ourselves failed us, in a way that we couldn't overcome at that moment.
All anger is reaction towards situations we dont have control over.
i could immediately prove this with a punch in the face if we were talking face to face. if I were to do it, one of the things you would feel is anger, and I'd be invoking that in you without your ability to control it. provided I didnt tell you about it first. If I told you about it, it would be under your control to avoid it, and you'd also understand why it was happening, so you could take it and try not to get angry to disprove it.
but next time you argue with someone, tell them that its no good to get angry at things beyond our control, then blindly punch them. 100% anger rate.
I have never really got angry, I imagine one day I will snap and just smash some heads. Not to say I let people mess me around and take the piss. Soon I will more than likely turn into Dexter.
The first sentence here seems to contradict the second and then agree with the third. I don't really follow.
What i mean is that problems managing anger doesnt mean it doesnt improve your hability to solve your problem
its just that those people thing bashing people in the skull is a valid solution to their problem. not everyone will act this way, and regardless of the specific decision, being angry increases your capacity of objetively analying situations, patterns, puzzles, etc.
Provide a source for that info.... experience in life proves quite the contrary.
Thats because you rarely find yourself in positions where you are angry and in full power to do something about it, leading to frustration and fury
if by "full power" you mean, you have the means to do something illegal or sociopathic like do whatever you want to get your ends, and you feel like you COULD KILL SOMEONE at any given moment, there is no person in the world who doesn't have "full power to do something about any situation to the fullest extent of their ability". however, There are these things called morals and laws (which are threats of punishment) which are designed to make people want to choose some other way of dealing with a situation.
the entirety of your posts are logical disconnects and contradictions.
You obviously didnt understand it, had nothing to do with what I said.
heres an example of a normal everyday situation, you are working on an essay, your pc crashes and you lose half an hour of work, you get pissed, nothing you can do, just redo the work, you will most likely work on a better rhythm for the next hour
what I meant is that things that usually get people angry usually involve some sort of variable they cant control, they attack things they associate the problem (this is an example to people who lose it when they are angry, not everyone)
my sources are at this moment in portuguese and printed in front of me =/
But that argument is extremely flawed. Why would a reasonable person get angry over something they can't control? There's no point. Either acknowledge that the problem can't be solved, or find a way to fix it, in this case that would be to invent something that makes a computer less likely to or stop crashing at all. I think it's more likely that someone would get angry over something they can control, because not having the answer when you know there is one implies lack of understanding or thought.
most of the human condition is getting angry at things we have no control over. thats where any and all anger comes from. Such as the anger at someone who kills someone you love. Thus sayeth the buddha and Dalai Lamas.
Are you assuming that you can only be angry at the person that kills someone you love?
Im explaining, not assuming, that anger is a reaction towards situations outside our control. Even anger towards self at failing something. if we did something and failed and felt anger about it, we did everything in our control to succeed, yet did not, therefore our phsyics calculations our brain performed must not have been accurate (in the case of sports), or some other part of our intellect or something outside ourselves failed us, in a way that we couldn't overcome at that moment.
All anger is reaction towards situations we dont have control over.
i could immediately prove this with a punch in the face if we were talking face to face. if I were to do it, one of the things you would feel is anger, and I'd be invoking that in you without your ability to control it. provided I didnt tell you about it first. If I told you about it, it would be under your control to avoid it, and you'd also understand why it was happening, so you could take it and try not to get angry to disprove it.
but next time you argue with someone, tell them that its no good to get angry at things beyond our control, then blindly punch them. 100% anger rate.
People are predictable.
See, but you assume that the only answer is anger. I'm simply proposing that acknowledgement is another answer. You're basically saying that everyone is only in denial therefore they get angry because they don't want to accept the truth. You also assume that the initiation of force initiates force, which is debatable. If you punched me in the face randomly, I'd ask why you did it. You would then suffer the consequences of that action. I'll even go farther. I've had a gun pointed at my face. You would assume first that I would be angry at this person, however you'd be wrong. Try to rationalize the situations, then accept what happened and seek justice. If I saw the person again, I wouldn't feel angry, but rather hope that they learned their lesson or bettered themselves, because the only reason they were in that situation was because of a lack of an answer to whatever problems they had. You said it yourself, people are predictable, just not in the way you think.
What i mean is that problems managing anger doesnt mean it doesnt improve your hability to solve your problem
its just that those people thing bashing people in the skull is a valid solution to their problem. not everyone will act this way, and regardless of the specific decision, being angry increases your capacity of objetively analying situations, patterns, puzzles, etc.
Provide a source for that info.... experience in life proves quite the contrary.
Thats because you rarely find yourself in positions where you are angry and in full power to do something about it, leading to frustration and fury
if by "full power" you mean, you have the means to do something illegal or sociopathic like do whatever you want to get your ends, and you feel like you COULD KILL SOMEONE at any given moment, there is no person in the world who doesn't have "full power to do something about any situation to the fullest extent of their ability". however, There are these things called morals and laws (which are threats of punishment) which are designed to make people want to choose some other way of dealing with a situation.
the entirety of your posts are logical disconnects and contradictions.
You obviously didnt understand it, had nothing to do with what I said.
heres an example of a normal everyday situation, you are working on an essay, your pc crashes and you lose half an hour of work, you get pissed, nothing you can do, just redo the work, you will most likely work on a better rhythm for the next hour
what I meant is that things that usually get people angry usually involve some sort of variable they cant control, they attack things they associate the problem (this is an example to people who lose it when they are angry, not everyone)
my sources are at this moment in portuguese and printed in front of me =/
But that argument is extremely flawed. Why would a reasonable person get angry over something they can't control? There's no point. Either acknowledge that the problem can't be solved, or find a way to fix it, in this case that would be to invent something that makes a computer less likely to or stop crashing at all. I think it's more likely that someone would get angry over something they can control, because not having the answer when you know there is one implies lack of understanding or thought.
most of the human condition is getting angry at things we have no control over. thats where any and all anger comes from. Such as the anger at someone who kills someone you love. Thus sayeth the buddha and Dalai Lamas.
Are you assuming that you can only be angry at the person that kills someone you love?
Im explaining, not assuming, that anger is a reaction towards situations outside our control. Even anger towards self at failing something. if we did something and failed and felt anger about it, we did everything in our control to succeed, yet did not, therefore our phsyics calculations our brain performed must not have been accurate (in the case of sports), or some other part of our intellect or something outside ourselves failed us, in a way that we couldn't overcome at that moment.
All anger is reaction towards situations we dont have control over.
i could immediately prove this with a punch in the face if we were talking face to face. if I were to do it, one of the things you would feel is anger, and I'd be invoking that in you without your ability to control it. provided I didnt tell you about it first. If I told you about it, it would be under your control to avoid it, and you'd also understand why it was happening, so you could take it and try not to get angry to disprove it.
but next time you argue with someone, tell them that its no good to get angry at things beyond our control, then blindly punch them. 100% anger rate.
People are predictable.
See, but you assume that the only answer is anger. I'm simply proposing that acknowledgement is another answer. You're basically saying that everyone is only in denial therefore they get angry because they don't want to accept the truth. You also assume that the initiation of force initiates force, which is debatable. If you punched me in the face randomly, I'd ask why you did it. You would then suffer the consequences of that action. I'll even go farther. I've had a gun pointed at my face. You would assume first that I would be angry at this person, however you'd be wrong. Try to rationalize the situations, then accept what happened and seek justice. If I saw the person again, I wouldn't feel angry, but rather hope that they learned their lesson or bettered themselves, because the only reason they were in that situation was because of a lack of an answer to whatever problems they had. You said it yourself, people are predictable, just not in the way you think.
either lying or using the subversive form of anger that is trying to stay "calm" while getting "revenge".
If you punched me in the face randomly, I'd ask why you did it. You would then suffer the consequences of that action
should I assume the consequence is something violent or forceful in nature, such as physical retaliation or legal retaliation (which is state supported physical retaliation), since even depriving someone of their time is doing a form of violence to them? Or should I assume you wrote a statement that you can deny any assumption made of being true no matter what I say because its so vague as to allow you to straw man out?
you were predictable in that as you'd try to deny yourself getting angry with a forewarned punch in the face by controlling yourself, in the previous post where it was predicted you would control it if you had foreknowledge, and here is an entire post saying you never get angry at all, which is essentially the same to an internet discussion about anger as to being in person and getting punched but getting advance warning. Denial of any anger.
Provide a source for that info.... experience in life proves quite the contrary.
Thats because you rarely find yourself in positions where you are angry and in full power to do something about it, leading to frustration and fury
if by "full power" you mean, you have the means to do something illegal or sociopathic like do whatever you want to get your ends, and you feel like you COULD KILL SOMEONE at any given moment, there is no person in the world who doesn't have "full power to do something about any situation to the fullest extent of their ability". however, There are these things called morals and laws (which are threats of punishment) which are designed to make people want to choose some other way of dealing with a situation.
the entirety of your posts are logical disconnects and contradictions.
You obviously didnt understand it, had nothing to do with what I said.
heres an example of a normal everyday situation, you are working on an essay, your pc crashes and you lose half an hour of work, you get pissed, nothing you can do, just redo the work, you will most likely work on a better rhythm for the next hour
what I meant is that things that usually get people angry usually involve some sort of variable they cant control, they attack things they associate the problem (this is an example to people who lose it when they are angry, not everyone)
my sources are at this moment in portuguese and printed in front of me =/
But that argument is extremely flawed. Why would a reasonable person get angry over something they can't control? There's no point. Either acknowledge that the problem can't be solved, or find a way to fix it, in this case that would be to invent something that makes a computer less likely to or stop crashing at all. I think it's more likely that someone would get angry over something they can control, because not having the answer when you know there is one implies lack of understanding or thought.
most of the human condition is getting angry at things we have no control over. thats where any and all anger comes from. Such as the anger at someone who kills someone you love. Thus sayeth the buddha and Dalai Lamas.
Are you assuming that you can only be angry at the person that kills someone you love?
Im explaining, not assuming, that anger is a reaction towards situations outside our control. Even anger towards self at failing something. if we did something and failed and felt anger about it, we did everything in our control to succeed, yet did not, therefore our phsyics calculations our brain performed must not have been accurate (in the case of sports), or some other part of our intellect or something outside ourselves failed us, in a way that we couldn't overcome at that moment.
All anger is reaction towards situations we dont have control over.
i could immediately prove this with a punch in the face if we were talking face to face. if I were to do it, one of the things you would feel is anger, and I'd be invoking that in you without your ability to control it. provided I didnt tell you about it first. If I told you about it, it would be under your control to avoid it, and you'd also understand why it was happening, so you could take it and try not to get angry to disprove it.
but next time you argue with someone, tell them that its no good to get angry at things beyond our control, then blindly punch them. 100% anger rate.
People are predictable.
See, but you assume that the only answer is anger. I'm simply proposing that acknowledgement is another answer. You're basically saying that everyone is only in denial therefore they get angry because they don't want to accept the truth. You also assume that the initiation of force initiates force, which is debatable. If you punched me in the face randomly, I'd ask why you did it. You would then suffer the consequences of that action. I'll even go farther. I've had a gun pointed at my face. You would assume first that I would be angry at this person, however you'd be wrong. Try to rationalize the situations, then accept what happened and seek justice. If I saw the person again, I wouldn't feel angry, but rather hope that they learned their lesson or bettered themselves, because the only reason they were in that situation was because of a lack of an answer to whatever problems they had. You said it yourself, people are predictable, just not in the way you think.
either lying or using the subversive form of anger that is trying to stay "calm" while getting "revenge".
If you punched me in the face randomly, I'd ask why you did it. You would then suffer the consequences of that action
should I assume the consequence is something violent or forceful in nature, such as physical retaliation or legal retaliation (which is state supported physical retaliation), since even depriving someone of their time is doing a form of violence to them? Or should I assume you wrote a statement that you can deny any assumption made of being true no matter what I say because its so vague as to allow you to straw man out?
What revenge is there to get? The action has already passed and acceptance has already happened. You're trying so hard here to prove that anger is the only way to react to a situation out of your control that you disregard any other approach and even call it a "lie" or say that I was trying to stay "calm" while seeking "revenge" when it's presented. That's disturbing and sad at the same time.
Should you assume that the consequence is something violent or forceful? No, but the situation presented is incomplete, so there's no way to know what course of action would be taken. Could it be forceful in nature? Sure. That still doesn't explain the other situation that isn't hypothetical.
I conceded your argument on getting punched in the face. That's fine, but I've never taken any course of action to plan or attempt revenge on someone that did actually threaten deadly force onto me. If I had, my life would be a lot different and I wouldn't be as happy. At the end of the day, I'm still alive here and that person deserves to make up for his mistake. I didn't know and still don't know his reasoning for his actions, but I'm not the person that should judge others in such a harsh way.
On March 28 2012 17:33 TRnoSki wrote: I have never really got angry, I imagine one day I will snap and just smash some heads. Not to say I let people mess me around and take the piss. Soon I will more than likely turn into Dexter.
You're lying to yourself, everyone get's angry. You may not notice it, but you get angry. Try asking your mother, it may not be full out rage, throwing shit after people, but you still get angry.
Also i do full out rage, smash shit up then get drunk. It works for me.
What's this bs about only being angry about things you can't control. People can get angry for just about everything. You're a man, you've got anger inside.
I used to just smash on the ground whatever I had lying around or to punch the table. I remember throwing a banana at a wall, I could never clean it all up ^^
On March 29 2012 13:36 ulan-bat wrote: I used to just smash on the ground whatever I had lying around or to punch the table. I remember throwing a banana at a wall, I could never clean it all up ^^
bwaha that's funny. I remember fisting my own frontwindow 5 years ago. anger wasn't the main reason, it was a feeble window and I had bad luck I suppose.
Massive scar on my hand, major blood loss, expensive hospital trip and expensive window replacement. :S
EPT
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