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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.

Posts of the following nature are banned:
1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post.
2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no.
3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture.
4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.

Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating.
bloodwhore~
Profile Joined September 2014
1010 Posts
December 31 2015 11:28 GMT
#15501
On December 31 2015 20:21 evilfatsh1t wrote:
bloodwhore you just lost all your fans in this thread. you are nothing to us now

side note: i would always recommend using a condom for people who have trouble with premature ejaculation. you probably didnt know you would come so fast (or maybe you did), but desensitising always helps.

Rip my feels ;___;

Yeah, but I felt like if I tried putting it on I would just lose it entirely... So I went yolo.

On December 31 2015 20:26 Laurens wrote:
Also when hooking up with ppl from Tinder.. come on man xD
Definitely get checked out.

Yeah I know...
"Allahu akbar" - Techies.
LemOn
Profile Blog Joined July 2005
United Kingdom8629 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-12-31 12:11:14
December 31 2015 12:08 GMT
#15502
WTF! No Condom? Dude! Think of kids names and what you'll name your genital herpes growths!
Whatever next time wear it ffs :D
Much is the father figure that I miss in my life. Go Daddy! DoC.LemOn, LemOn[5thF]
waffelz
Profile Blog Joined June 2012
Germany711 Posts
December 31 2015 12:49 GMT
#15503
Chill bloodwhore. Not using a condom was not the greatest move of all times, but it is not the worst either. Most sexual transfered diseases including unplanned parenthood have only a certain chance to get(Especially getting pregnant, aka "Kugelgrippe" here in germany, is not that easy, even if you intend to). Not wrong to get tested but you dont have to stress yourself.
RIP "The big travis CS degree thread", taken from us too soon | Honourable forum princess, defended by Rebs-approved white knights
GreenHorizons
Profile Blog Joined April 2011
United States24459 Posts
December 31 2015 13:56 GMT
#15504
Inb4 Bloodwhore's penis falls off.

Anyway, Congratz man.
"People like to look at history and think 'If that was me back then, I would have...' We're living through history, and the truth is, whatever you are doing now is probably what you would have done then" "Scratch a Liberal..."
Syfiass
Profile Joined April 2010
France89 Posts
December 31 2015 14:11 GMT
#15505
Gratz Bloodwhore ! But I hope that will get you your appetite back, don't mess with your health :p
Dingodile
Profile Joined December 2011
4139 Posts
December 31 2015 14:38 GMT
#15506
"...premature ejaculation" ?! Does it mean you are already done before fun start or later at end where you cannot control your best thing?
Grubby | ToD | Moon | Lyn | Sky
Ramiel
Profile Blog Joined September 2008
United States1220 Posts
December 31 2015 15:10 GMT
#15507
Dont give oral, or have no protection while fucking random girls. If they have something, congrats- its noe all over your face and dick.

Personally i dont sex a random girl till we go on a blood test date. That way, when everything comes back clean, we can go wild.
A thread vaguely bashing SC2? SWARM ON, LOW POST COUNT BRETHREN! DEFEND THE GLORIOUS GAME THAT IS OUR LIVELIHOOD
Dingodile
Profile Joined December 2011
4139 Posts
December 31 2015 15:26 GMT
#15508
I still dont feel safe if both have clean blood when fucking with random girls. A serious gf is the exception.
Grubby | ToD | Moon | Lyn | Sky
Ramiel
Profile Blog Joined September 2008
United States1220 Posts
December 31 2015 15:28 GMT
#15509
If a blood test is clean, you are fine lol
A thread vaguely bashing SC2? SWARM ON, LOW POST COUNT BRETHREN! DEFEND THE GLORIOUS GAME THAT IS OUR LIVELIHOOD
Dingodile
Profile Joined December 2011
4139 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-12-31 16:23:04
December 31 2015 16:07 GMT
#15510
On January 01 2016 00:28 Ramiel wrote:
If a blood test is clean, you are fine lol

And if after sex (or next blood test with next girl) you notice your blood isnt clean? Maybe the chemistry between two random ppl fucking aren't safe.

edit: I have no clue about blood test lol. I think we are talking only about a blood test with only sex diseases? What if you do have poisoning from something else?
Grubby | ToD | Moon | Lyn | Sky
Ramiel
Profile Blog Joined September 2008
United States1220 Posts
December 31 2015 16:56 GMT
#15511
What are you talking about? The blood test is used to determine if you have any STD / STI floating around in your system. That's it. It lets you and your partner know that both of you will not be sharing any STDs / STIs with each other. Poisoning, and blood type (a, b, AB, o) make no sense in this context. Any other type of disease that someone may have, is not transmittable during sex- so who cares?
A thread vaguely bashing SC2? SWARM ON, LOW POST COUNT BRETHREN! DEFEND THE GLORIOUS GAME THAT IS OUR LIVELIHOOD
DarkPlasmaBall
Profile Blog Joined March 2010
United States46629 Posts
Last Edited: 2015-12-31 18:45:26
December 31 2015 18:38 GMT
#15512
It's certainly not worth the risk or worry.

1) Cover your stump before you hump

+ Show Spoiler +
2) Before you attack her, wrap your whacker
3) Don't be silly, protect your Willie
4) When in doubt, shroud your spout
5) Don't be a loner, cover your boner
6) You can't go wrong, if you shield your dong
7) If your not going to sack it, go home and whack it
8) If you think she's spunky, cover your monkey
9) It will be sweeter if you wrap your peter
10) If you slip between her thighs, condomize
11) She won't get sick if you wrap your dick
12) If you go into heat, package your meat
13) While you're undressing Venus, dress up your penis
14) When you take off her pants and blouse, suit up your mouse
15) Especially in December, gift wrap your member
16) Never ever deck her, with an unwrapped pecker
17) Don't be a fool, vulcanize your tool
18) The right selection, is to protect your erection
19) Wrap it in foil, before you check her oil
20) A crank with armor, will never harm her
21) If you really love her, wear a cover
22) Don't make a mistake, cover your snake
23) Sex is cleaner with a packaged wiener
24) If you can't shield your rocket, leave it in your pocket
25) No glove, no love
26) If you think she'll sigh, cover old one eye
27) Even If she's eager, protect her beaver
28) No one likes a horse's ass, protect yourself at climax
29) Shield her from the hunt until you shoot her in the cunt
30) Avoid a frown, contain your clown
31) Harness the pygmy man before entering the bearded clam
32) Constrain the little head before you stick it in the shed
33) Put a condom on your dink before you dart it in her sink
34) The weasel you must surround before you please her on the ground
35) Cloak the joker before you poke her
36) Encase that torch before you paint her porch
37) Cape your throbber before you bob her
38) After detection, sheath your erection
39) Before you penetrate, hide your magistrate
40) Don't surprise her, plug your Geyser
41) Cover that lumber before you pump her
42) Protect her wrinkle before you sprinkle
43) She won't bristle if you wrap your whistle
44) House your noodle, then release your strudel
45) Put your dog in the pound and make her yelp like a hound
46) Shelter your jerky, then nab that turkey
47) Cage that snake, then shake and bake
48) Cover your peter, it will be much neater
49) Coat that Labrador, then allow him to explore
50) It's always funky to cage your monkey
51) It won't be funny with a coatless dummy
52) It won't be fun with an unwrapped thumb
53) It's not much money to catch your honey
54) Don't be a fool, cover your tool
55) Hood that match, then scratch that thatch
56) Stitch that switch, then itch her niche
57) Wrap that tool to catch the drool
58) It ain't no jibe to protect her hive
59) Contain that sputum before you use him
60) Restrain your log, then plow her bog
61) Glove your pecker before you check her
62) Coat that slimmer before you prime her
63) Condomize then womanize
64) Cover old pete, then grind her meat
65) Guard your peter before you meet her
66) Check your list before you tryst
67) Wrap your bate before you mate
68) Can your worm before you squirm
69) Cover your pipe you dumb ass wipe
70) Contain your lizard, then tickle her gizzard
71) Bag the mole, then do her hole
72) Cuff your carrot before you share it
73) Jail your number, then call the plumber
74) Cover your vein, then drive her insane
75) Wrap that pickle, then slip her a tickle
76) Protect your dink, then fluff her mink
77) Restrain your lantern, then stick it in her cavern
78) Hide ole harry, then take her cherry
79) Wrap that spout, then bore her out
80) Conceal your train, don't cause her pain
81) Guard your bridge, then do her ridge
82) Shroud your trout, then make her shout
83) To make her squat like a turkey, cover your Jerky
84) Box your blister, then poke her in the whiskers
85) Wrap your spout to catch the trout
86) Plug your funnel, then enter the tunnel
87) Cover your steamer before you ream her
88) Protect that fish, then dip it in the dish
89) Contain that bass for a swim in her glass
90) Be sure to wear it to feed her ferret
91) Clothe the boner before you hone her
92) Got no protection? Can't use your erection!
93) Cork your pump or you don't hump
94) No unwrapped stags get between her legs
95) Dress that erection to make a deflection
96) Contain that shanker before you spank her
97) Cap that seeder before you breed her
98) Stop the stream before you cream
99) Secure that ladder, then drain your bladder
100) Protect your screw to catch that glue
101) Package your meat for a real neat treat
102) Holster your gun, then shooting's more fun
103) Canvas that trailer before you nail her
104) Garage the tractor, then attack her
105) Net that grass hopper before you pop her
106) Sock that wanger before you bang her
107) Pen that rooster, she'll be much looser
108) Trim your hardwood, then do her real good
109) Garnish your oak, then give her a poke
110) Pouch your associate, then go fornicate
111) Smother your affiliate before you ejaculate
112) Confine your fascinate before it regurgitates
113) Catch that goat before it bloats
114) Ensnare that barbarian, then do her abdomen
115) Restrain your hammer, then wam bam her
116) Prune that stalk, then make her squawk
117) Wrap that rod, then please her bod
118) Sheath that knife, she ain't your wife
119) House that bottle, then mash her throttle
120) Sash that hash, then thrash that gash
121) Cover your diddle, then fiddle her middle
122) Can your knob, then throb her swab
123) Contain old Doug, then clean her rug
124) Cover your limb before you swim
125) Retain your bailer, then impail her
126) Rope your dope, then make some soap
127) Net your salamander, then make salad in her
128) Cap your flapper, then sniff her snapper
129) Wrap that Steed, then trample her weeds
130) Hat that chef, then scramble her cleft
131) Cover your stone before you bone
132) House your hose, then curl her toes
133) Saddle your penis, then straddle her mean ass
134) Blanket your twitch, then hump that bitch
135) Shield your rocks, then pound her box
136) Cover old sly, then do her dry
137) Wrap your rail, then fill her pail
138) Glove your chimney before you come in me
139) If your nude, tube your dude
140) Cloak your hitter, then go split her
141) Wrap your nipper before you dip her
142) Can your spam, then bam that ma'am
143) Corral your ram, then slice her ham
144) Sheath your sliver, then jab her liver
145) Twist your wick, then stick that prick
146) Cover old Bart, then dart her tart
147) Shed old spot, then do her slot
148) Drawer your pip, then split her lips
149) Contain that leach, then mash her peach
150) Bag your elm, then take the helm
151) Constrain your gem to catch the flem
152) Catch that head cheese, or I won't spread these
153) Constrain that agate you ain't no faggot
154) Survey your land, then plant her stand
155) Before you drive her, protect that diver
156) Sack that slimy smelt, then tan her beaver pelt
157) Wrap that stiffer, then let him sniff her
158) Cover you post, then slice her roast
159) Blanket old juicy, then plug old loosey
160) Balloon your baboon, the moon tune her poon
161) Contain that viper before you pipe her
162) Wrap your whopper, then go bop her.

~ https://www.netjeff.com/humor/item.cgi?file=CondomSlogans
"There is nothing more satisfying than looking at a crowd of people and helping them get what I love." ~Day[9] Daily #100
ragnasaur
Profile Blog Joined April 2006
United States804 Posts
December 31 2015 21:29 GMT
#15513
lmao that is awesome

gotta wrap it up though (#94)
| (• ◡•)| (❍ᴥ❍ʋ) George Forman doesnt have any fingerprints
GreenHorizons
Profile Blog Joined April 2011
United States24459 Posts
December 31 2015 21:41 GMT
#15514
On January 01 2016 01:56 Ramiel wrote:
What are you talking about? The blood test is used to determine if you have any STD / STI floating around in your system. That's it. It lets you and your partner know that both of you will not be sharing any STDs / STIs with each other. Poisoning, and blood type (a, b, AB, o) make no sense in this context. Any other type of disease that someone may have, is not transmittable during sex- so who cares?


Wait was the blood date not to find out if she would be a compatible kidney donor?... I've been doing this all wrong
"People like to look at history and think 'If that was me back then, I would have...' We're living through history, and the truth is, whatever you are doing now is probably what you would have done then" "Scratch a Liberal..."
Yoz
Profile Joined August 2010
Australia357 Posts
January 01 2016 01:41 GMT
#15515
On January 01 2016 00:28 Ramiel wrote:
If a blood test is clean, you are fine lol


While I don't have the information on hand I believe you can return a false negative for an STI/STD test if you contracted it shortly before doing the test.

Seem to recall the safe point being either 3 mths or 6 mths after last unprotected intercourse if you want to be completely safe?
Skynx
Profile Blog Joined January 2013
Turkey7150 Posts
Last Edited: 2016-01-01 12:35:40
January 01 2016 12:00 GMT
#15516
Happy new year alphas!

Edit: wow congratz bloodwhore!
"When seagulls follow the troller, it is because they think sardines will be thrown into the sea. Thank you very much" - King Cantona | STX 4 eva
bloodwhore~
Profile Joined September 2014
1010 Posts
Last Edited: 2016-01-01 17:04:08
January 01 2016 15:34 GMT
#15517
Happy new year, and thanks!

To get on the subject, I'm not really worried about an std with this particular girl, but in general it was a really stupid move, I'm a hardcore advocater of condoms myself so...
"Allahu akbar" - Techies.
QuanticHawk
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States32161 Posts
January 01 2016 17:22 GMT
#15518
dont listen to the haters bloodwhore it's not real sex with a condom
PROFESSIONAL GAMER - SEND ME OFFERS TO JOIN YOUR TEAM - USA USA USA
AeroGear
Profile Joined July 2009
Canada652 Posts
Last Edited: 2016-01-01 20:55:44
January 01 2016 20:55 GMT
#15519
On December 31 2015 19:59 bloodwhore~ wrote:
Evening started with us talking a bit, then we started watching a movie and cuddling. After the movie we made out, I went down on her for a while then I inserted penis and came really fast, and that was it. I have had aproximately 0 appetite for food these last 3 days so I wasn't feeling very good, otherwise I might have tried to go for another round. This morning we started cuddling again and I went down on her again (until she came?), I don't know if she did but she told me to stop and seemed pleased. I think she wanted me to get off to but I told her it wasn't going up, I wasn't feeling it, had barely eaten anything the day before so I had zero energy left and my dick was like at 70% the last night. At that point she just thanked me for doing it and we started cuddling again.


Please tell me she showered first or, at the very least after the previous night sex session, before you 'went down' on her again.
Driven by hate, fueled by rage
B.I.G.
Profile Blog Joined August 2010
3251 Posts
January 02 2016 10:37 GMT
#15520
You guys are waaaaaay too scared of catching something. No sex until you have a blood test date? That was a joke right?

Just use your brains guys. As long as you don't go barebacking Nairobi steet prostitutes or have unprotected anal orgies in random darkrooms you will generally be fine, especially if you wrapped your tool. You might catch the clap once or twice but who cares right?

Also bloodwhore going down on a random girl is kinda nasty..
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