Dating: How's your luck? - Page 495

Legally she's an adult no?

There's nothing wrong with acting off attraction that's completely normal.

You know yourself better than anyone else, if you are the kind of person that gets hurt over relationships, then its best to just be really direct and open with her before you get invested. If you can handle break ups easily and you are really confident then you could play it as you go.

If you are scared of "ruining the chance" because you think things are going amazingly with this hot girl and you don't wanna screw it up then I would be wary. This is exactly the kind of mentality that will get you super invested and then not work out.

I want to just emphasise this because of the bolded part. You know nothing about her, saying that she already ticks all the boxes means you are giving her attributes that don't exist or can't possibly know yet, possibly because of her looks. She can't possibly "tick all the boxes" until you know a lot more about her.

Take off the rose tinted glasses and see her for who she is, have valid reasons for getting into a relationship with her. Its just if your drivers are mostly external it can cause you a lot of pain when things don't work out. In the end she's just a girl, nothing separates her from the rest of them, she's not special and there's nothing to say that you won't meet a better person in the future.

As long as you have your life worked out and you know exactly what you want, and you know when to let things go if you don't connect, then there is nothing to be worried about.

This is what I would do (I'm not you so I'm not saying this is the best way). Make sure to not just come out of the blue, give her some time to prepare. In the middle of a chat during the day say something like "hey what are you doing after work? I'd like to talk to you about something" at a really comfortable time, then play it off and continue your fun chat like you've normally been doing. If she's busy just say ok and keep talking, move on, try again later, if she says she's got time then there's probably something going on.

Then come that time start chatting with her, talk anything interesting about your day, exaggerate it! tell her some amazing story that happened or whatever.

Then you could be really direct look straight at her in the eyes and say (and try to be as slow and casual as possible, don't blurt it out) "Yeah so I find you really attractive, I think you feel the same way about me, and was wondering if you wanted to hang out". She will either say no sorry or yes, this is good because you don't get invested and get hurt in the future, or you both are "in the know" and you can escalate quickly without trouble. No matter how she responds keep talking, it will make both of you feel better and not make the situation weird.

Once you start dating, escalating wise I found its just better to save the trouble and get everything out the door for me. Tell her what you like, your lifestyle and what you are about, what you are looking for, find how you can fulfill each others needs, e.g sex, going out and enjoyment, what you find attractive, etc (same for her). Obviously not like an interview manner, but I try to get the bases covered early because the longer the relationship goes the harder these questions are for her to answer. And if you don't match up just let it go and find someone else that fits you better.

Or you can be indirect and play games and take the rollercoaster ride of not knowing where each other are at, either works it depends on you and the girl, really its up to you.

Huh, well there are many factors at play here.

First off all, we need to look at some logistical factors. Will your work be effected by the pursuit of this girl? Atm, I only care about your wellness, so if there are any policies regarding forging relationships b/w employees. And even though, you will be out there in 2 months, I hate to your work getting prematurely terminated.

Under the assumption that your job placement won't be affected, is it legally to date her? Which appears to be positive through http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ages_of_consent_in_Europe#Netherlands. So if it is legal to date her, you shouldn't feel bad about it at all!

Personally, I treat women with respect so by the fact that she is acting really flirty with you is a sign that she WANTS you to flirt back. By denying her advances, you are unconsciously saying that she ain't good for you, this will perhaps make her lose self-esteems and really not showing the necessary respect that she deserves.

By all means, you should go for it! Later on, you may never see this girl again due to moving, careers, or just general life obstacles. Will you really live the rest of your life in regret of thinking about "what if..."?