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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.

Posts of the following nature are banned:
1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post.
2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no.
3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture.
4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.

Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating.
Fojod
Profile Joined May 2013
United States28 Posts
July 24 2013 20:00 GMT
#4561
Fojod went on a date once. The next day The Great Fojod had to set fire to Fojod's magnificent domicile and flee the city. It was a good day for Fojod
I am the Fojod
QuanticHawk
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States32044 Posts
July 24 2013 21:05 GMT
#4562
nice guys finish last because the self professed nice dudes are guys who think nice = buying shit for women, doing things for women means youre owed sex, and then get pissed when their approach backfires
PROFESSIONAL GAMER - SEND ME OFFERS TO JOIN YOUR TEAM - USA USA USA
Geiko
Profile Blog Joined June 2010
France1939 Posts
July 24 2013 21:12 GMT
#4563
On July 25 2013 06:05 QuanticHawk wrote:
nice guys finish last because the self professed nice dudes are guys who think nice = buying shit for women, doing things for women means youre owed sex, and then get pissed when their approach backfires


Nope.

Nice guys finish last because women like confident men, and most nice guys aren't that confident.
geiko.813 (EU)
DemigodcelpH
Profile Joined August 2011
1138 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-07-24 21:27:25
July 24 2013 21:14 GMT
#4564
On July 25 2013 06:05 QuanticHawk wrote:
nice guys finish last because the self professed nice dudes are guys who think nice = buying shit for women, doing things for women means youre owed sex, and then get pissed when their approach backfires


This isn't true. Elementary "PUAs" think being an asshole gets you laid which couldn't be further from the truth; in reality you want to be a well-rounded ambitious person who isn't a pushover, but still has some good qualities. Avoiding anything that could be perceived as "nice" because you want to get your sausage wet is a psychotic weak one-track mindset that often wreaks of beta.
chadissilent
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Canada1187 Posts
July 24 2013 22:25 GMT
#4565
It's just a mindset for the weak. A dynamic person will be much more successful in the "mating game" - just like in any situation. If you're a good person and can have a lot of fun, people will be drawn to you. Don't think "good person" = "little bitch" either. Nobody wants a yes man, nobody wants someone who will do anything they want, and nobody wants someone who only tries to make them happy at all cost. You have to know when to stand your ground vs. agree/cave, you need to know when to be sweet or sexy, you need to be confident in everything you do. Work on yourself before working on your game and you won't even have to try to get laid.
QuanticHawk
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States32044 Posts
July 24 2013 22:32 GMT
#4566
you guys are talking about genuine nice dudes who fail for the reasons youre talking about. i am talking 'nice guys' as in the fedora wearing retard who gets thinks dinner and a movie = owed sex

PROFESSIONAL GAMER - SEND ME OFFERS TO JOIN YOUR TEAM - USA USA USA
Mjolnir
Profile Joined January 2009
912 Posts
July 24 2013 22:48 GMT
#4567
On July 25 2013 06:12 Geiko wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 25 2013 06:05 QuanticHawk wrote:
nice guys finish last because the self professed nice dudes are guys who think nice = buying shit for women, doing things for women means youre owed sex, and then get pissed when their approach backfires


Nope.

Nice guys finish last because women like confident men, and most nice guys aren't that confident.


People need to stop confusing nice with being a pushover.

It's been the same song and dance for ages. Everyone thinks nice guys finish last and they trumpet that song all the way to Assholeville, then wonder why they can't land a decent chick.

Nice does not equal being a spineless fool who can't stand up for himself and puts women on a pedestal only to get friend-zoned or taken advantage of. Nice means nice. Period.

Everyone out there reading this thinking "Man, if I wanna land chicks I gotta be bad-ass, not care, and alpha as fuck," why not try just being respectful, confident, honest, straightforward, and decent. Your demeanour can still demand respect and ooze confidence while you're being nice — and you'll be fucking shocked at the response you get from the people (women) around you.

WombaT
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
Northern Ireland24419 Posts
July 24 2013 22:48 GMT
#4568
So basically guys that aren't actually nice at all.

I know it's painful, but I find among people I know who suffer from the 'nice guys finish last' mentality is a lack of self-analysis as to why this pattern keeps repeating. You aren't owed a partner, you should be somebody that excites engages and interests a prospective partner. There are plenty of people who will treat the object of your affection with base kindness, you don't differentiate yourself in that sense. In my youth when I found myself getting frustrated, I try to imagine myself being trapped with a girl who thinks I owe her a romantic relationship, but who I find boring and how that would make me feel.

Equally, agreed with DemigodcelpH on the people who take the opposite tack. Fed up dealing with self-professed 'alphas' whose craving for the acceptance of women is nothing but the behaviour of a 'beta' that they so despise.
'You'll always be the cuddly marsupial of my heart, despite the inherent flaws of your ancestry' - Squat
Drake
Profile Joined October 2010
Germany6146 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-07-24 23:07:53
July 24 2013 23:07 GMT
#4569
bad ... jaeh its bad ! ... damn why everyone post in this thread ^^
i come on teamliquid like a random nerd happy and seeing this every time ... and instant i get depressed
why ? why you hate me xD can i blind out this thread anyhow ? xD
Nb.Drake / CoL_Drake / Original Joined TL.net Tuesday, 15th of March 2005
arb
Profile Blog Joined April 2008
Noobville17920 Posts
July 24 2013 23:16 GMT
#4570
im not sure what a girl means when she goes

"I dont want you in the friend zone but im scared youre going to leave me hanging like last time"
wtf is that supposed to mean?
Artillery spawned from the forges of Hell
QuanticHawk
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
United States32044 Posts
July 24 2013 23:24 GMT
#4571
youre what tim tebow was to mark sanchez. youll get playing time, but youll never be the starter. but it is kinda ok, because who the fuck wants to play for the jets???
PROFESSIONAL GAMER - SEND ME OFFERS TO JOIN YOUR TEAM - USA USA USA
WombaT
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
Northern Ireland24419 Posts
July 25 2013 00:01 GMT
#4572
On July 25 2013 08:16 arb wrote:
im not sure what a girl means when she goes

"I dont want you in the friend zone but im scared youre going to leave me hanging like last time"
wtf is that supposed to mean?

Well what happened last time I guess is the question that I have with that?

@Drake yeah it can be a bit of a downer, we were tempted to rename this misanthropes corner so people know what they're getting themselves in for.
'You'll always be the cuddly marsupial of my heart, despite the inherent flaws of your ancestry' - Squat
LOLZEY
Profile Joined December 2011
Canada71 Posts
July 25 2013 00:30 GMT
#4573
honestly, I'm finding it so hard to go out with girls with my current situation. My life is so busy right now with school, work, gym, other stuff that I barely see my roommates and friends. I'm out working on stuff for like 15 hours a day. I've gotten a few numbers and been on a few dates but nothing materializes because I'm often too busy to respond to the girl afterwards. Nevermind that my schedule is extremely unpredictable >.<

man what do I do, just game girls for one-night-stands?
hi
chadissilent
Profile Blog Joined September 2010
Canada1187 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-07-25 00:36:45
July 25 2013 00:35 GMT
#4574
On July 25 2013 08:16 arb wrote:
im not sure what a girl means when she goes

"I dont want you in the friend zone but im scared youre going to leave me hanging like last time"
wtf is that supposed to mean?

Make a move. You were probably scared/indecisive and she moved on.

On July 25 2013 09:30 LOLZEY wrote:
honestly, I'm finding it so hard to go out with girls with my current situation. My life is so busy right now with school, work, gym, other stuff that I barely see my roommates and friends. I'm out working on stuff for like 15 hours a day. I've gotten a few numbers and been on a few dates but nothing materializes because I'm often too busy to respond to the girl afterwards. Nevermind that my schedule is extremely unpredictable >.<

man what do I do, just game girls for one-night-stands?

Find a steady hookup if you're too busy for a relationship. If you're both clear about it, it's fucking awesome. 1 hour of commitment and you're both happy and can continue with your day.
WombaT
Profile Blog Joined May 2010
Northern Ireland24419 Posts
July 25 2013 00:38 GMT
#4575
On July 25 2013 09:30 LOLZEY wrote:
honestly, I'm finding it so hard to go out with girls with my current situation. My life is so busy right now with school, work, gym, other stuff that I barely see my roommates and friends. I'm out working on stuff for like 15 hours a day. I've gotten a few numbers and been on a few dates but nothing materializes because I'm often too busy to respond to the girl afterwards. Nevermind that my schedule is extremely unpredictable >.<

man what do I do, just game girls for one-night-stands?

With so much going on, do you particularly want to go out with girls? If not, hey make use of a time in your life that is productive and potentially fruitful on that issue in the long-term. If you do, is there anything in your schedule that is optional or that you would feel comfortable cutting down on?
'You'll always be the cuddly marsupial of my heart, despite the inherent flaws of your ancestry' - Squat
Deleted User 183001
Profile Joined May 2011
2939 Posts
Last Edited: 2013-07-25 01:09:19
July 25 2013 00:49 GMT
#4576
On July 25 2013 06:12 Geiko wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 25 2013 06:05 QuanticHawk wrote:
nice guys finish last because the self professed nice dudes are guys who think nice = buying shit for women, doing things for women means youre owed sex, and then get pissed when their approach backfires


Nope.

Nice guys finish last because women like confident men, and most nice guys aren't that confident.

You're not much more correct than he is.

Confident women like confident men. Awkward, insecure, etc. girls are typically scared of confident, sociable, outgoing dudes, unless they really, really know said guy. That said, confident guys that are douchebags (ie. not nice) will literally scare off every single girl that isn't confident and secure and often times a bitch as well.
Mentalizor
Profile Joined January 2011
Denmark1596 Posts
July 25 2013 19:16 GMT
#4577
On July 25 2013 05:00 Fojod wrote:
Fojod went on a date once. The next day The Great Fojod had to set fire to Fojod's magnificent domicile and flee the city. It was a good day for Fojod


Could Fojod elaborate?
(yಠ,ಠ)y - Y U NO ALL IN? - rtsAlaran: " I somehow sit inside the bus.Hot_Bit giving me a massage"
IceCube
Profile Blog Joined June 2009
Croatia1403 Posts
July 25 2013 19:56 GMT
#4578
On July 26 2013 04:16 Mentalizor wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 25 2013 05:00 Fojod wrote:
Fojod went on a date once. The next day The Great Fojod had to set fire to Fojod's magnificent domicile and flee the city. It was a good day for Fojod


Could Fojod elaborate?

I think Fojod never elaborates, it's just Fojod being a Fojod..
Forever Vulture.. :(
ziggurat
Profile Joined October 2010
Canada847 Posts
July 25 2013 20:21 GMT
#4579
On July 25 2013 09:49 JudicatorHammurabi wrote:
Show nested quote +
On July 25 2013 06:12 Geiko wrote:
On July 25 2013 06:05 QuanticHawk wrote:
nice guys finish last because the self professed nice dudes are guys who think nice = buying shit for women, doing things for women means youre owed sex, and then get pissed when their approach backfires


Nope.

Nice guys finish last because women like confident men, and most nice guys aren't that confident.

You're not much more correct than he is.

Confident women like confident men. Awkward, insecure, etc. girls are typically scared of confident, sociable, outgoing dudes, unless they really, really know said guy. That said, confident guys that are douchebags (ie. not nice) will literally scare off every single girl that isn't confident and secure and often times a bitch as well.

Unfortunately, many girls who have low self-esteem respond very well to assholes. I don't exactly understand the psychology of this but it's an observable fact. I think it's something along the lines of "he's treating me like shit, I must have done something to deserve it, I'll have to try to be even nicer to him."

Ironically, many "nice" guys seem to have the same attitude when women walk all over them.
Shadowpostin
Profile Joined June 2012
Germany798 Posts
July 25 2013 21:07 GMT
#4580
wellp I just gained a new gf but lost my fucking wallet in the process
gg life
allow me to demonstrate the skill of shaolin
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