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We are extremely close to shutting down this thread for the same reasons the PUA thread was shut down. While some of the time this thread contains actual discussion with people asking help and people giving nice advice, it often gets derailed by rubbish that should not be here. The moderation team will be trying to steer this thread in a different direction from now on.
Posts of the following nature are banned:
1) ANYTHING regarding PUA. If your post contains the words 'alpha' or 'beta' or anything of that sort please don't hit post.
2) Stupid brags. You can tell us about your nice success stories with someone, but posts such as 'lol 50 Tinder matches' are a no-no.
3) Any misogynistic bullshit, including discussion about rape culture.
4) One night stands and random sex. These are basically brags that invariably devolve into gender role discussions and misogynistic comments.
Last chance, guys. This thread is for dating advice and sharing dating stories. While gender roles, sociocultural norms, and our biological imperative to reproduce are all tangentially related, these subjects are not the main purpose of the thread. Please AVOID these discussions. If you want to discuss them at length, go to PMs or start a blog. If you disagree with someone's ideologies, state that you disagree with them and why they won't work from a dating standpoint and move on. We will not tolerate any lengthy derailments that aren't directly about dating. |
United Kingdom13775 Posts
On December 30 2018 18:27 bloodwhore~ wrote:
Not everyone is after what you deem to be a "rich social life" though. I don't care for having another 5 different hobbies just in order to meet women. I can barely keep up with my current ones. I don't care for going to pubs in order to meet women. Drinking in general or "going out" is usually boring as fuck to me. I don't really care for having tons of acquantances either just to get into other social groups.
It's good advice for people who like being more of a social butterfly, and I for sure believe that it is more natural meeting girls through friends. I just don't see it happening to me, not often at least. So if you're like me, your options for not going online is basically just asking out girls you see on the street, or wait a long time until a natural opportunity appears.
I don't believe in changing who you are just to meet women. I don't really think it's bad using online dating either, it's just a hassle a lot of the times and if you're not good looking and possess good critical thinking - you're fucked.
Wanted to just drop in to say that I concur. I also think that saying "use Meetup" is pretty subpar dating advice for that reason - when it's actually about dating, that just ends up being completely and utterly bad. And it's not bad to admit to yourself that you don't want to have a spattering of social hobbies and just want to date. For all the flaws of online dating, at least it's a pretty honest take on what you're actually after.
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I just want to have a baby. Don’t care if the relationship works. I just want a healthy offspring.
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On December 31 2018 02:52 Emnjay808 wrote:
I just want to have a baby. Don’t care if the relationship works. I just want a healthy offspring.
How old are you?
A stable household increases dramatically the chances of having a mentally healthy offspring.
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On December 31 2018 02:52 Emnjay808 wrote:
I just want to have a baby. Don’t care if the relationship works. I just want a healthy offspring.
Sounds incredibly unhealthy for both you, the other parent, and most of all the child. A good relationship between the parents, especially in the younger years, helps a lot on the upbringing.
edit: Should probably have added: Being a single parent isn't necessarily bad, but having relationship trouble while having a young child certainly is asking for trouble. If you don't care about a relationship, as mentioned below: adopt.
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And if you really want a child, but don't care for the relationship to produce one part, adoption is something you might want to think about.
This is a much better plan that having some weird relationship with the mother as you described, which will probably not end well. It will still end up with you as a single parent, which is a lot more stressful than being a parent in a loving relationship with the other parent. It will also make raising the child harder (One person doing the work of two is bound to not be as effective), but it will still be better than raising a child in a broken family where mother and father hate each other.
Now, i don't know how easy it is to adopt a child when you are single. I have never looked into this. But still. Don't traumatize your child with a shitty family.
Also, a child will probably not fix whatever is a problem in your life. This is important to remember. Children do not fix problems, though they obviously can make you happy. But don't have a child to fix some thing, that sucks for you and the child.
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Since nobody mentioned it: In the large majority of cases, mothers get the child after separation of their parents  So your plan also requires some kind of drug addict or similar, so you have a chance!
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You could look into Big Brother Big Sister to be an older male role model to a younger(between like 6 and 16) boy/teen if that's what you're looking for.
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I’m 30 I’m old af
To clarify: I want to meet a partner who is just as interested as having a baby with the preferred traits we respectively look for in partners. With having a baby as first priority and working on the relationship as a second.
I don’t think it’s that uncommon tbh
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I'm 25 and doing BBBS. I don't think they have an upper age limit.
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On December 31 2018 12:21 Emnjay808 wrote:
I’m 30 I’m old af
To clarify: I want to meet a partner who is just as interested as having a baby with the preferred traits we respectively look for in partners. With having a baby as first priority and working on the relationship as a second.
I don’t think it’s that uncommon tbh
what are your preferred traits?
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Thick, wavy/semi-curly hair to dominate my thin straight hair (wanna give my son a fighting chance to not go bald at the age of 25). Also ethnicities that doesn’t include Filipino, variety is the spice of life.
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that's a tall order to fill
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If I were the woman I'd feel like you treat me as a cow to get inseminated :D
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Yeah, adoption seems like your best bet. If you're not all that interested in the SO, then casual stuff on the side doesn't seem like a bad idea.
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Is this the eugenics thread now?
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On December 31 2018 15:04 Emnjay808 wrote:
Thick, wavy/semi-curly hair to dominate my thin straight hair (wanna give my son a fighting chance to not go bald at the age of 25). Also ethnicities that doesn’t include Filipino, variety is the spice of life.
You realize the hairtype/thickness doesnt make a difference in whether a man goes bald or not? Its a genetic thing. A man can have the thickest hair ever in their teens/early 20's and go bald a couple of years later.
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Not look as bald*
Thinner hair is more noticeable bald than thicker hair.
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Going to try to date more seriously this year. As in not bothering meeting someone who is only after sex.
Currently got like 3 possible girls that I believe in.
First is a german girl who lives in Sweden, met her three times already. I think she is into me a bit, can't say that I have gotten any feelings yet. And while it's cozy being with her, I think I should stop seeing her soon I don't catch feelings. Otherwise I feel I might just be wasting her and my time.
Second girl is someone who I haven't met yet, she is moving here tomorrow. So after that we can start going on dates.
Third girl I met yesterday, it was basically netflix and chill at my place. So I have already failed my attempt of dating more seriously. Dear lord though, she is by far the most attractive girl I've slept with. She is like 1cm shorter than me, so around 5'9". Absolutely flawless body. It's hard not to get a bit self concious about how I look even though I think I'm pretty good looking. FUCK.
I am not sure if she is after something serious though. We barely talked on tinder and we just set a date at my place. I'm going to give it a day then I'll ask her if she wants to go on a bit more serious date. She seems to be decently smart as well, studying to be a programmer so she isn't completely braindead, which is honestly refreshing for tinder.
I feel like whenever I'm hyped for someone it never pans out, hopefully this year will be different.
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On January 03 2019 20:26 bloodwhore~ wrote:
She seems to be decently smart as well, studying to be a programmer so she isn't completely braindead, which is honestly refreshing for tinder.
I see you haven't been around a lot of programmers, especially students...
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I'd argue if she successfully completes those studies, she's definitely not stupid. But being a student doesn't really say anything yet 
GL with your new year's resolution bloodwhore. I settled for a girl after a similar dating spree and while I do miss it a bit, I'm definitely happier now.
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EPT
