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Inertiaddict
United States126 Posts
On August 13 2011 17:34 FJ wrote: If you came here to hang out, you would be living amazing stories. I've never wanted to go to the Middle East ever, but I'm thinking of looking up flights now, lol. Looking like $1,400. But for some of these fun times it seems worth it. I'd definitely chill with you and see what goes on. | ||
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Inertiaddict
United States126 Posts
We (My parents, brother and I) were at LaGuardia Airport and I was flying down to Florida to meet my Aunt and Uncle who lived down in Eustis, Florida (Pronounced: Yoo-stiss). I'm in New York, so it's only like a 3 hour flight. This was a good 7 years before 9/11. So we're at the baggage check-in and this woman's asking me the typical questions that a person gets asked... Now, I'm a bit of a wise-ass, I tell people it's the only type of ass I know how to be, and I don't always care or think before I say things... So she asked me if anyone had touched my bags besides me and I told her, "No, I pack my own bombs!" My parents both gasped then face-palmed, LOL. They've since spent a lot of time bringing this moment up to me in mini-lectures about growing up. The thing is, I've done sexual things, crazy things, stupid things and wise ass things, but I'm not generally embarrassed by them. If you're interested anyway, I'll share them, too, I just don't want to come off like I'm bragging or something. | ||
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Ixirawr
United States86 Posts
So I am at my cousin's funeral. Me and my brother, who always fight, get into some stupid argument while we were there, and I, without thinking, say "kill yourself!" Everyone within earshot gets very uncomfortable, some of them - including my aunt, the mother of the dead cousin - start to cry again. To make it worse? Afterwards I find out my cousin commited suicide. No one had told me how he had died. Anyway, my dad, while crying (he was close to my cousin, and my comment upset him) takes me outside and goes off on me. I didn't say another word the whole day. | ||
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Geordie
United Kingdom653 Posts
On August 13 2011 05:59 FJ wrote: I had this Filipina maid, well I suppose my family did. She came to the house everyday but Friday (Friday is a weekend in this Country) She was of similar age to my parents, and had 3 children who all work and live in Dubai also. Now, I met her kids a couple times and we have had a couple chats on FB. She has a pretty daughter, and she has sent a few flirty messages to me. They planned a big fun day in a mall, and they asked if I could like to go with them and their friends one particular friday. So I went and met her kids and their friends in a mall and we hanged out. It was a good time, and in the evening, it ended up just me and the pretty daughter who was my age. I asked if she wanted to come to my house since no one is home, and we can hang out for a while. I genuinely had no intention to do this, it was an honest invite to the house to hang out for a couple hours before she goes home. But we ended up having sex. I felt bad when she was flirting with me, since her mother is my maid, but I am a 20 year old male human, and when a pretty girl is asking, how can I refuse?  So, why I always get caught I don't know. But the maid decided to come and clean the house anyway, I don't know why, it was her day off but she came to the house. She knew I was out, my parents also, so she got to my room to clean, and since she expected no one home, she just walks in to catch me and her daughter in my bed...... It was the worst thing ever! I could have died. The maid quit very soon after that, and never told my parents why she decided to leave. Dude post a picture of what you look like as I cant imagine how a guy who gets as much ass as you wont look like casonava or some shit. I need to know what standards philipinos have L | ||
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FJ
United Kingdom321 Posts
I say to my filipino friends - Hey, check her out, she is fit. - And my filipino friends disagree. We have different perception of beauty. But, it is easy to get laid by a Filipina girl with you're British. I just flash them my passport, promise a green card, and we're good hahaha. | ||
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keeblur
United States826 Posts
That and talking in front of class is always embarrassing for me, because I'm not very good at speaking in front of a group of people, so it makes it worse just thinking about how embarrassing it is. | ||
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Undercat
Canada39 Posts
and then i was BANGING this HOT chick who was FILIPINO OR SOMETHING AND THEN some oddly specific and ridiculously intricate shit went down and it ended with everybody laughing in their underwear. | ||
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DisneylandSC
Netherlands435 Posts
On August 13 2011 19:44 Undercat wrote: Okay there I was, being the OP of this thread. and then i was BANGING this HOT chick who was FILIPINO OR SOMETHING AND THEN some oddly specific and ridiculously intricate shit went down and it ended with everybody laughing in their underwear. haha lol'd [/thread] | ||
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EternalSC
Sweden313 Posts
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Benjef
United Kingdom6921 Posts
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sleepingdog
Austria6145 Posts
After it was over, I was standing with my friends together in the elevator...and I complained hard about the stupid questions. Everybody was looking at me awkwardly, I had no idea why. When I got out I realized: the professor, who examined me, stood right behind me the whole elevator-trip. Now that was uncool. | ||
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Ikkuhh
Netherlands9 Posts
My older brother was just done with his final exams at school and he had some friends over and the lot of them are just drinking. About an hour or so after they arrive, not too long before my supposed bed time, my brother comes down to my room quite tipsy asking me to join them for some drinking games.. Had my parents been home, I would never have considered it but as it was, how could i resist.....So we start playing a few card games and my bro is making me take beer shots instead of anything stronger and we are all having a good time. However about an hour in I can already feel the alcohol building up but as I cant really relate the feeling to anything i ignore it. Noticing this, my bro tells me to go to bed but before i do i decided to try and impress everyone there by grabbing for this 1 L glass of very much vodka favored Vodka-coke.....and chug about half of it..... Needless to say my parents came home a few hours later to find me lying in an enormous pool of my own vomit on my bed  The next morning both me and my brother had horrible hangovers, but somewhat naive as all mothers are, mine assumed i had food poisoning or something. Not until my brother accidentally showed her Facebook pictures of the night did she find out the truth.....As a side note, I can attest that the stories FJ is telling are more realistic than they seem, given what it's like to live in the middle east....My school had several royals as well as the kids of minisers and government officials meaning you met many people "high up".....anyways great thread, keep them coming FJ :D | ||
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FJ
United Kingdom321 Posts
On August 13 2011 19:44 Undercat wrote: Okay there I was, being the OP of this thread. and then i was BANGING this HOT chick who was FILIPINO OR SOMETHING AND THEN some oddly specific and ridiculously intricate shit went down and it ended with everybody laughing in their underwear. hahaha, do you live here also? I have stories that don't involve hot girls. So, I have a close friend, Filipina girl also. She lived in an apartment with about a dozen people, but she worked hard and managed to get together a higher paying job and because of the property going down so much, so could afford a small one bedroom place she could share with, and I quote 'Just 3 other people!' She was really happy. So I helped her move in, and she had the week off from work to sort things out. She invited me over to her house to see how the place looked now it was finished. So I went there and we chilled out, enjoying her new home. She was telling me how she now feels very very lonely, living with just a few people, out from the city. She was upset, she loves animals and wanted a puppy so bad, but she simply can not afford one. They cost ALOT on Dubai since arabs hate animals haha. I tried to cheer her up, and suggested we cook something nice, as the gas was just turned on, but we needed a few things first. She told me she would cook a special beef dish for me I was happy, she is a great cook.So we got in my car and headed to the open market. We went and bought some vegetables, and then headed for the meat section across the market. I could write and entire book about what I have seen in this place, but not in this story. As we headed for the market, we both heard a small yelp, and turned. We saw a small dog, locked in a tiny tiny cage, barely enough to stand. My friend ran over to the dog, and there was instant mutual affection between them. Despite the outward appearance of this scruffy mutt, it has the most amazing eyes, full of genuine expression. The dog, despite it's condition, seemed happy to see my friend, and my friend happy to see the dog. After stroking and having her hand licked, she glanced at the price tag and squealed. She turned to me and said 'FJ, wow, should I get Jenrickson lang?' I asked, and she explained that was the name she just made up for him. So I said, 'You know what? Go for it, I will be happy for you' So she took the cage to the counter, then said 'Ok, we will take half of this please. Skinned, but leave the bones.' Then we went home and ate a special dog stew as apposed to the beef stew we intended to eat. What a heart warming tale noh? | ||
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firehand101
Australia3152 Posts
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keeblur
United States826 Posts
On August 13 2011 20:49 FJ wrote: hahaha, do you live here also? I have stories that don't involve hot girls. So, I have a close friend, Filipina girl also. She lived in an apartment with about a dozen people, but she worked hard and managed to get together a higher paying job and because of the property going down so much, so could afford a small one bedroom place she could share with, and I quote 'Just 3 other people!' She was really happy. So I helped her move in, and she had the week off from work to sort things out. She invited me over to her house to see how the place looked now it was finished. So I went there and we chilled out, enjoying her new home. She was telling me how she now feels very very lonely, living with just a few people, out from the city. She was upset, she loves animals and wanted a puppy so bad, but she simply can not afford one. They cost ALOT on Dubai since arabs hate animals haha. I tried to cheer her up, and suggested we cook something nice, as the gas was just turned on, but we needed a few things first. She told me she would cook a special beef dish for me I was happy, she is a great cook.So we got in my car and headed to the open market. We went and bought some vegetables, and then headed for the meat section across the market. I could write and entire book about what I have seen in this place, but not in this story. As we headed for the market, we both heard a small yelp, and turned. We saw a small dog, locked in a tiny tiny cage, barely enough to stand. My friend ran over to the dog, and there was instant mutual affection between them. Despite the outward appearance of this scruffy mutt, it has the most amazing eyes, full of genuine expression. The dog, despite it's condition, seemed happy to see my friend, and my friend happy to see the dog. After stroking and having her hand licked, she glanced at the price tag and squealed. She turned to me and said 'FJ, wow, should I get Jenrickson lang?' I asked, and she explained that was the name she just made up for him. So I said, 'You know what? Go for it, I will be happy for you' So she took the cage to the counter, then said 'Ok, we will take half of this please. Skinned, but leave the bones.' Then we went home and ate a special dog stew as apposed to the beef stew we intended to eat. What a heart warming tale noh? Sounds embarrassing to have to be around a girl like that, but not gonna start a moral debate, different strokes. | ||
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PaPoolee
United Arab Emirates660 Posts
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tabbott26
United Kingdom379 Posts
On August 13 2011 10:39 Seldentar wrote: I find most of them believable, but that last one with the Princess of the Emirate seemed a bit of a stretch especially considering the repetitiveness of you insulting all these super famous people without realizing who they were. You would've thought your sister would've told you that you would be hanging out with the Princess lol You'd be surprised, the royal family is very much with an enclosed group of friends in Dubai. | ||
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amd098
Korea (North)1366 Posts
On August 13 2011 17:34 FJ wrote:  I kinda feel like I am missing out on a great friendship. If you came here to hang out, you would be living amazing stories. That other guy was right though, you live in the USA, a western, established Country. This is the middle east, a very very different place indeed. having spent 6 months in the mid east, his stories dont even lol me, its common you get the super rich and the ultra poor, lamborghini is as common as honda pretty much a bunch of people got lucky on oil and now live the rich life without having any idea of what to do with their money | ||
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Psychobabas
2531 Posts
Anyway, I flashed my passport to them and the deal was sealed since I'm British. So I kept changing between them in different positions (doggystyle, missionary, hot lunch being the main ones), well over 3 hours, when all of a sudden one of them just farted. LOL So I just kept on banging them throughout the night and then did the same with another group of filipinos or something like that the next day. Maybe I'll tell you what happened in that massive orgy I went to the other day but thats way too embarrassing. | ||
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FJ
United Kingdom321 Posts
The Royalty is important, but the last daughter to an unimportant Emirate is I suppose about as famous as the mayors daughter to a Manchester in England. Sure, it is interesting, but it is not like I meet someone like the Barack daughters. | ||
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