Bump, mostly because of the rake comment, but also all the funny-ass pickup lines.

IDK if you already did the contest, but this thread IMO deserves to be seen again.

Now I have to contribute don't I? You know, to add to my good reason?

Okay:

Some creepy ones:

"Ma'am... something's wrong. When I look at you my penis keeps growing. How do I make it stop?"
"50 bucks to get in the van."
"Have you ever had a 4-inch diameter dildo stuffed into any of your three holes? No? Well good, cause neither have I."

Some you should say to the boyfriend:

"I'm a cross between Robin Hood, Sean Connery, and Harry Houdini. I'll rob you while making your girlfriend's virginity disappear."
"She doesn't turn me on. Can I fuck you instead?"

Some you should say to her (after striking a short conversation):

"So... what's your level in World of Warcraft?"
"What do you mean you don't play WoW? What kind of fucked up chick are you?"
"You're coming with me, Warcraft virgin."

"Fact: I have the largest e-penis in the room."