• Log InLog In
  • Register
Liquid`
Team Liquid Liquipedia
EDT 08:03
CEST 14:03
KST 21:03
  • Home
  • Forum
  • Calendar
  • Streams
  • Liquipedia
  • Features
  • Store
  • EPT
  • TL+
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Smash
  • Heroes
  • Counter-Strike
  • Overwatch
  • Liquibet
  • Fantasy StarCraft
  • TLPD
  • StarCraft 2
  • Brood War
  • Blogs
Forum Sidebar
Events/Features
News
Featured News
Code S RO4 & Finals Preview: herO, Rogue, Classic, GuMiho0TL Team Map Contest #5: Presented by Monster Energy4Code S RO8 Preview: herO, Zoun, Bunny, Classic7Code S RO8 Preview: Rogue, GuMiho, Solar, Maru3BGE Stara Zagora 2025: Info & Preview27
Community News
Firefly suspended by EWC, replaced by Lancer2Classic & herO RO8 Interviews: "I think it’s time to teach [Rogue] a lesson."2Rogue & GuMiho RO8 interviews: "Lifting that trophy would be a testament to all I’ve had to overcome over the years and how far I’ve come on this journey.8Code S RO8 Results + RO4 Bracket (2025 Season 2)14BGE Stara Zagora 2025 - Replay Pack2
StarCraft 2
General
Firefly suspended by EWC, replaced by Lancer Jim claims he and Firefly were involved in match-fixing How herO can make history in the Code S S2 finals Rogue & GuMiho RO8 interviews: "Lifting that trophy would be a testament to all I’ve had to overcome over the years and how far I’ve come on this journey. Code S RO8 Results + RO4 Bracket (2025 Season 2)
Tourneys
[GSL 2025] Code S: Season 2 - Semi Finals & Finals WardiTV Mondays Sparkling Tuna Cup - Weekly Open Tournament $3,500 WardiTV European League 2025 Sea Duckling Open (Global, Bronze-Diamond)
Strategy
Simple Questions Simple Answers [G] Darkgrid Layout
Custom Maps
[UMS] Zillion Zerglings
External Content
Mutation # 478 Instant Karma Mutation # 477 Slow and Steady Mutation # 476 Charnel House Mutation # 475 Hard Target
Brood War
General
BW General Discussion ASL20 Preliminary Maps BGH Auto Balance -> http://bghmmr.eu/ Recent recommended BW games FlaSh Witnesses SCV Pull Off the Impossible vs Shu
Tourneys
[Megathread] Daily Proleagues [BSL 2v2] ProLeague Season 3 - Friday 21:00 CET Small VOD Thread 2.0 [BSL20] ProLeague Bracket Stage - Day 4
Strategy
I am doing this better than progamers do. [G] How to get started on ladder as a new Z player
Other Games
General Games
Stormgate/Frost Giant Megathread Path of Exile Nintendo Switch Thread Beyond All Reason What do you want from future RTS games?
Dota 2
Official 'what is Dota anymore' discussion
League of Legends
Which UAE App Developers Are Leading the Innovatio
Heroes of the Storm
Simple Questions, Simple Answers Heroes of the Storm 2.0
Hearthstone
Heroes of StarCraft mini-set
TL Mafia
Vanilla Mini Mafia TL Mafia Community Thread
Community
General
US Politics Mega-thread Things Aren’t Peaceful in Palestine UK Politics Mega-thread Russo-Ukrainian War Thread Vape Nation Thread
Fan Clubs
SKT1 Classic Fan Club! Maru Fan Club
Media & Entertainment
Korean Music Discussion [Manga] One Piece
Sports
2024 - 2025 Football Thread Formula 1 Discussion NHL Playoffs 2024 TeamLiquid Health and Fitness Initiative For 2023
World Cup 2022
Tech Support
Computer Build, Upgrade & Buying Resource Thread
TL Community
The Automated Ban List
Blogs
A Better Routine For Progame…
TrAiDoS
StarCraft improvement
iopq
Heero Yuy & the Tax…
KrillinFromwales
I was completely wrong ab…
jameswatts
Need Your Help/Advice
Glider
Trip to the Zoo
micronesia
Customize Sidebar...

Website Feedback

Closed Threads



Active: 33992 users

[The Ghetto Cook] VII: EZ-PZ Pasta

Blogs > Newbistic
Post a Reply
Newbistic
Profile Blog Joined August 2006
China2912 Posts
Last Edited: 2011-10-06 05:03:33
October 06 2011 05:00 GMT
#1
The Ghetto Cook
Episode VII: EZ-PZ Pasta
AKA what DRG would cook if he cooked pasta


Introduction

Hello all! Welcome to the belated seventh installment of TGC. I apologize for the hiatus, I just went though a period of time where I didn't cook anything terribly interesting/lost my passion/etc etc.

Long time readers of the TGC series may have noticed that the recent few installments have all been about making baked or pastry goods, which may not be the most interesting for young budget cooks. To return to the ghetto roots, this installment will be a pretty simple one about making a pasta dish, something most people are probably already familiar with. As a bonus, I will also include how to make a very simple cole slaw that can easily go with any other dish you are making.

Ingredients

[image loading]
As I was laying the stuff out for this pic, I realized that holy sh*t, this actually is a lot of ingredients

Cole Slaw

1 Carrot
1/8 Cabbage*
2 Tbsp Ranch/Mayo
1 tsp Peanut Butter
1 tsp White Granulated Sugar
Salt
Pepper

Pasta (Serves Two or Three)

1 lb package short, non-stringy pasta**
1/2 Large Onion, sliced thin
~2 Cups Frozen Peas
2 Tbsp Butter/Margarine
2 Tbsp Flour
3-4 oz Cheese***
1 can Tuna****
Bacon*****
Salt
Pepper
Garlic/Garlic Salt
Milk

*Can be green/red/mixture of both
**Ideally not spaghetti or linguini or long pastas like that. I used rotinis, feel free to use macaroni, ziti, or a bajillion other short, forkable pastas.
***A good melting cheese preferably. I honestly have no idea what is the optimal cheese for a cheese sauce pasta, if anyone can clue me in that would be great. I used mozzarella since it was on hand. You also want about 50% to twice as much as I have shown in the picture for best results.
****The shitty cheap canned tuna I bought completely disintegrated and made the sauce texture kind of crappy. You may wish to buy higher quality canned tuna or use another source of fish. Pretty much any chunky protein is acceptable, including cubed/stripped chicken, ham, tofurkey, etc.
***** I didn't have any on hand, but this is highly, highly recommended. Pre-cooked and broken into small pieces.

Procedure

Begin by making the cole slaw. Whisk together ranch/mayo, peanut butter, and sugar until smooth:

[image loading]
Use spoon if psychic, not Asian, or goes by Battle.Net handle Thorzain

Unlike lettuce salads, where it is best to hold off the dressing until just before serving, I prefer my cole slaw to be slightly wilted and the flavor of the dressing to penetrate the cabbage. Shred both carrots and cabbage, and toss them in the dressing. Salt and pepper to taste.

If you don't have a shredder, you can use a knife. First, slice the carrot lengthwise. Then, slice both halves thinly along a diagonal:

[image loading]
I believe Thorzain would use a spoon for this step too.

For the cabbage, chop thinly along the latitude, like this:

[image loading]
GET TO DA CHOPPA NAOW

The final product:

[image loading]
A bright orange and purple dish, you'd think this was shredded poisonous amazonian tree frog or something similarly less than healthy

Once the salad is tossed (wink wink nudge nudge), set it aside to marinate. Begin on the pasta. Pour about a gallon of water into a large pot, add salt, and turn on the heat.

In another pot, melt two tablespoons of butter at medium heat. Long time readers of TGC may realize where this is going. We're going to make a roux, just like in the first ever installment of TGC for broccoli and cheddar soup. Slowly whisk two tablespoons of flour into the melted butter, and push this mixture around the bottom of the pot for a couple of minutes. The mixture should look like yellow sand:

[image loading]
Visually identical to the bane of vaginas everywhere

Sometimes, cooks will cook this mixture until it is brownish and gives off a nutty scent. I won't be doing this, however, because I am using a white cheese, and this is going to be a white sauce. After a few minutes, slowly whisk in enough milk so that you get a thick, velvety, sauce-like consistency:

[image loading]
The shine is from the butter. No sticky fingers here.

Continue cooking and stirring the mixture, adding in more milk if the sauce becomes too dry. Cook for about 5 minutes, then add in the onions, salt, pepper, and garlic salt. Garlic salt is cheap and keeps for a long time. Use fresh garlic if you have it. Overall, you want the sauce to be slightly on the salty side because it will be used to flavor the pasta, but keep in mind that cheese, canned tuna, and bacon all contain salt, so do not over-season at this point in time. Cook for another 5 minutes or so.

By now the pasta water should be close to boiling. The timings for this dish are starting to converge. As soon as the water starts boiling, dump your pasta into the pot. Follow the instructions for how long the pasta needs to cook to reach al dente, but cook for 1 minute less than the shown time. Immediately also dump your frozen peas into your sauce. Cook this for another 5 minutes or so, turn the heat down to LOW, then dump the cheese, tuna, and bacon into the sauce:

[image loading]
The PZ part of EZPZ pasta. Yeah, I know you saw that one coming.

Taste the sauce. If it is too bland, now is the time to add salt and pepper before combining with the pasta. Cook the sauce until the pasta is 1 minute away from al dente. Remove pasta from water, and dump the sauce into the pasta. Fold sauce into the pasta and cook everything together for the last minute. Remove from heat, plate, and serve.

The Result

[image loading]
A meal fit for a ghetto cook.

4.5 / 5 Nothing spectacular, but still very nourishing and good. In hindsight, I think chicken would be even better suited for this dish, but oh well. Despite the large number of ingredients, overall the dish is quite fast to make, maybe 40 minutes total with plenty of time in between to work on several other dishes if you are multitasking.

Conclusion

There you have it folks, simple pasta with a simple side dish. As always, questions and comments are welcome, especially if you know what I'm doing wrong or what I can improve on. I know from reading other food blogs that there are quite a few culinary elites on TL, so if you can provide some input I'd greatly appreciate it! Especially if you know what kinds of cheeses are best for this type of sauce, and what additional spices would elevate the sauce to a different level.

If you wish to read more about how to make edible dishes using budget ingredients, please check out the previous installments of TGC:

Broccoli and Cheddar Soup
Cheapass Chili
Scallion Biscuits
Fake Fried Rice
Pan Fried Buns Part I
Pan Fried Buns Part II
French Fucking Toast

Keep your eyes peeled for the next installment of TGC, which will be something totally sweet! Until next time, This is the GSL.

*****
Logic is Overrated
BLinD-RawR
Profile Blog Joined April 2010
ALLEYCAT BLUES50107 Posts
October 06 2011 06:15 GMT
#2
its a new edition of TGC! yes this pasta is ezpz indeed.
Brood War EICWoo Jung Ho, never forget.| Twitter: @BLinDRawR
TL+ Member
Grettin
Profile Joined April 2010
42381 Posts
October 06 2011 07:39 GMT
#3
GET TO DA CHOPPA. Loving the blog.
"If I had force-fields in Brood War, I'd never lose." -Bisu
iNViCiOUZ
Profile Joined January 2011
Germany364 Posts
October 06 2011 09:18 GMT
#4
now i am hungry

Think I try it this week!
Velr
Profile Blog Joined July 2008
Switzerland10668 Posts
October 06 2011 10:42 GMT
#5
Hm.. When I do a kinda similar sauce things I go "faster" :p (but I LOVE cheese so that’s why I probably don't need the "roux-base" to get a decent consistency ):


1: cook/fry/bread the Oignons/Vegetables/Bacon/Whatever other ingredients a little (not too much of anything, this is no vegetable/whatever sauce :p).
2: Put some white wine or/and water in and let all of it cook for a while (depends on the ingredients you used, I for instance don't like "uncooked" peperoni in my pasta).
3. Add Cream (or Milk, but cream is just better).
4. Add Cheese.. (until the consistency is as you wish, tons of cheese..nomnom cheese... Or some Flour.. but then you better would have started with a Roux anyway ).
5. Eat.
6. Awesome!

Btw. the most important rule about cooking:
Everything tastes better with bacon and/or cream.
Newbistic
Profile Blog Joined August 2006
China2912 Posts
October 06 2011 20:05 GMT
#6
On October 06 2011 19:42 Velr wrote:
Hm.. When I do a kinda similar sauce things I go "faster" :p (but I LOVE cheese so that’s why I probably don't need the "roux-base" to get a decent consistency ):


1: cook/fry/bread the Oignons/Vegetables/Bacon/Whatever other ingredients a little (not too much of anything, this is no vegetable/whatever sauce :p).
2: Put some white wine or/and water in and let all of it cook for a while (depends on the ingredients you used, I for instance don't like "uncooked" peperoni in my pasta).
3. Add Cream (or Milk, but cream is just better).
4. Add Cheese.. (until the consistency is as you wish, tons of cheese..nomnom cheese... Or some Flour.. but then you better would have started with a Roux anyway ).
5. Eat.
6. Awesome!

Btw. the most important rule about cooking:
Everything tastes better with bacon and/or cream.


I think this is actually the better way to make cream sauce for pasta. But cream, wine, and cheese are all far more expensive than a bit of flour and a bit of butter.

One day sometime in the future I will do it with wine and cream.
Logic is Overrated
Please log in or register to reply.
Live Events Refresh
Wardi Open
11:00
$400 Monday #40
WardiTV690
OGKoka 344
CranKy Ducklings168
Rex144
IndyStarCraft 133
Liquipedia
[ Submit Event ]
Live Streams
Refresh
StarCraft 2
OGKoka 344
Harstem 220
Rex 144
IndyStarCraft 133
ProTech74
StarCraft: Brood War
Britney 30446
Rain 5218
Horang2 3130
EffOrt 578
Larva 502
actioN 469
Mini 410
Stork 330
Zeus 246
Light 189
[ Show more ]
Snow 169
Pusan 158
ZerO 146
Mong 124
Sharp 93
JulyZerg 83
PianO 79
hero 64
Rush 54
Killer 44
sSak 36
Backho 33
JYJ32
zelot 26
Movie 25
soO 24
Icarus 22
sorry 17
Noble 13
Sacsri 12
Shine 11
scan(afreeca) 9
ivOry 7
yabsab 7
Dota 2
420jenkins880
XcaliburYe692
League of Legends
Dendi510
Counter-Strike
olofmeister2470
shoxiejesuss1094
x6flipin527
Other Games
singsing1747
B2W.Neo917
C9.Mang0513
Liquid`RaSZi414
crisheroes406
Fuzer 235
Lowko146
ArmadaUGS144
Pyrionflax118
ZerO(Twitch)18
hiko2
Organizations
Dota 2
PGL Dota 2 - Secondary Stream6912
PGL Dota 2 - Main Stream1904
Other Games
gamesdonequick518
StarCraft 2
Blizzard YouTube
StarCraft: Brood War
BSLTrovo
sctven
[ Show 15 non-featured ]
StarCraft 2
• StrangeGG 40
• AfreecaTV YouTube
• intothetv
• Kozan
• IndyKCrew
• LaughNgamezSOOP
• Migwel
• sooper7s
StarCraft: Brood War
• iopq 6
• BSLYoutube
• STPLYoutube
• ZZZeroYoutube
League of Legends
• Nemesis1875
• Jankos501
Other Games
• WagamamaTV111
Upcoming Events
Replay Cast
11h 57m
Replay Cast
21h 57m
RSL Revival
21h 57m
Cure vs Percival
ByuN vs Spirit
PiGosaur Monday
1d 11h
RSL Revival
1d 21h
herO vs sOs
Zoun vs Clem
Replay Cast
2 days
The PondCast
2 days
RSL Revival
2 days
Serral vs SHIN
Solar vs Cham
RSL Revival
3 days
Reynor vs Scarlett
ShoWTimE vs Classic
uThermal 2v2 Circuit
4 days
[ Show More ]
SC Evo League
4 days
Circuito Brasileiro de…
5 days
Sparkling Tuna Cup
5 days
Liquipedia Results

Completed

Proleague 2025-06-11
2025 GSL S2
Heroes 10 EU

Ongoing

JPL Season 2
BSL 2v2 Season 3
BSL Season 20
KCM Race Survival 2025 Season 2
NPSL S3
Rose Open S1
CSL 17: 2025 SUMMER
Copa Latinoamericana 4
Murky Cup #2
BLAST.tv Austin Major 2025
ESL Impact League Season 7
IEM Dallas 2025
PGL Astana 2025
Asian Champions League '25
BLAST Rivals Spring 2025
MESA Nomadic Masters
CCT Season 2 Global Finals
IEM Melbourne 2025
YaLLa Compass Qatar 2025
PGL Bucharest 2025

Upcoming

CSLPRO Last Chance 2025
CSLPRO Chat StarLAN 3
K-Championship
SEL Season 2 Championship
Esports World Cup 2025
HSC XXVII
Championship of Russia 2025
RSL Revival: Season 1
BLAST Open Fall 2025
Esports World Cup 2025
BLAST Bounty Fall 2025
BLAST Bounty Fall Qual
IEM Cologne 2025
FISSURE Playground #1
TLPD

1. ByuN
2. TY
3. Dark
4. Solar
5. Stats
6. Nerchio
7. sOs
8. soO
9. INnoVation
10. Elazer
1. Rain
2. Flash
3. EffOrt
4. Last
5. Bisu
6. Soulkey
7. Mini
8. Sharp
Sidebar Settings...

Advertising | Privacy Policy | Terms Of Use | Contact Us

Original banner artwork: Jim Warren
The contents of this webpage are copyright © 2025 TLnet. All Rights Reserved.