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[girl blog] I'm not even sad...

Blogs > Garnet
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Garnet
Profile Blog Joined February 2006
Vietnam9021 Posts
Last Edited: 2014-11-22 11:11:56
September 16 2014 06:44 GMT
#1


*
Shebuha
Profile Blog Joined May 2011
Canada1335 Posts
September 16 2014 06:54 GMT
#2
Please don't make the mistake of putting some girl before your career. Love is a beautiful thing, but you shouldn't put your life on hold waiting on somebody.
Pangpootata
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
1838 Posts
September 16 2014 08:25 GMT
#3
Dude, you were 10. She's probably changed a lot since then, and you won't know how she's like now. You're in love with your idea of her, or your fantasy of her, not what she really is.

You should just go and find someone else. Seriously.
Rathwirt
Profile Joined January 2011
United States42 Posts
September 16 2014 09:26 GMT
#4
^this.
Split.
Profile Joined September 2011
Switzerland234 Posts
September 16 2014 09:35 GMT
#5
Yeah just go on with your life and maybe when the opportunity arises talk to her and get to know her again. But since it's been so long I'd suggest not prioritizing her over other things.
nunez
Profile Blog Joined February 2011
Norway4003 Posts
September 16 2014 09:47 GMT
#6
silently wait for her in your cave, there is still hope.
conspired against by a confederacy of dunces.
ilovezil
Profile Blog Joined August 2006
United States4143 Posts
September 16 2014 09:48 GMT
#7
Logically, I agree with the other posts regarding the fact that it's been so long and that realistically, you're probably in love with this image you built of her since then, and throughout the years.

However, I do think that's quite amazing also that you've held this love for such a long time. I honestly didn't even think people could hold such affections for that long of a time. I'd say that you should make an active effort to at least reach out to this person. Whether or not you decide to pursue your feelings, I think you should at least come to a conclusion, since it's clear you've held onto these feelings for such a long time. So confess your feelings, have a good talk with her, something to close this matter. Of course, in the off chance it does work out, it would turn out to be quite a love story as well, one that a small part of me is hoping would work.
Pangpootata
Profile Blog Joined January 2011
1838 Posts
September 16 2014 11:00 GMT
#8
On September 16 2014 18:48 ilovezil wrote:
Logically, I agree with the other posts regarding the fact that it's been so long and that realistically, you're probably in love with this image you built of her since then, and throughout the years.

However, I do think that's quite amazing also that you've held this love for such a long time. I honestly didn't even think people could hold such affections for that long of a time. I'd say that you should make an active effort to at least reach out to this person. Whether or not you decide to pursue your feelings, I think you should at least come to a conclusion, since it's clear you've held onto these feelings for such a long time. So confess your feelings, have a good talk with her, something to close this matter. Of course, in the off chance it does work out, it would turn out to be quite a love story as well, one that a small part of me is hoping would work.

Err, she's already in a relationship. Shan't want to go around wrecking other people's lives.
Garnet
Profile Blog Joined February 2006
Vietnam9021 Posts
September 16 2014 11:34 GMT
#9
On September 16 2014 18:48 ilovezil wrote:
Logically, I agree with the other posts regarding the fact that it's been so long and that realistically, you're probably in love with this image you built of her since then, and throughout the years.

However, I do think that's quite amazing also that you've held this love for such a long time. I honestly didn't even think people could hold such affections for that long of a time. I'd say that you should make an active effort to at least reach out to this person. Whether or not you decide to pursue your feelings, I think you should at least come to a conclusion, since it's clear you've held onto these feelings for such a long time. So confess your feelings, have a good talk with her, something to close this matter. Of course, in the off chance it does work out, it would turn out to be quite a love story as well, one that a small part of me is hoping would work.

Like poster above said, she's already in a relationship. But yeah if I see her I will make an active effort to talk to her, see if she's still that girl from my childhood or has become someone else.
JD.
Profile Joined September 2014
Australia250 Posts
Last Edited: 2014-09-16 12:15:06
September 16 2014 12:11 GMT
#10
You're a Haruki Murakami (1Q84) novel now, well done.

I'm kind of in the same boat, actually. In love with someone I met when I was... 14, but through the years we were friends (14-18) I never really realised it despite how close we were (+ The opportunities that did happen I brushed off thinking I wasn't worth + had a lot going on). Now 24 and she recently became friends with some of my close friends, so maybe lifes throwing another chance at me.
ZenithM
Profile Joined February 2011
France15952 Posts
September 16 2014 16:44 GMT
#11
Still a cute story. But yeah, it's time to move on man.
Topin
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
Peru10078 Posts
September 16 2014 18:03 GMT
#12
time to move on. GL
i would define my style between a mix of ByuN, Maru and MKP
krndandaman
Profile Joined August 2009
Mozambique16569 Posts
September 16 2014 18:25 GMT
#13
--- Nuked ---
SteelSinger
Profile Joined July 2012
21 Posts
September 16 2014 18:52 GMT
#14
On September 16 2014 15:44 Garnet wrote:
Seeing her like this reminds me (again) about my shitty life. I'm still stuck in college (to raise my GPA to 2.5), work random tutoring jobs that are barely enough to buy gas and food, have some friends but no close one. She is just way out of my league (not that this matters, if she didn't have a bf I might actually go for one last try).



The best thing to do right now, is work on yourself, invest in yourself. Cause that's the only thing that's constant, the only thing that you bring along everywhere you go is you. It's what I've been doing for the past couple months, after what 7 years of neglect?

Don't accept this negative bullshit that surrounds you. Fight it! Whenever you meet resistance it's where you need to go.

You have a shitty life. OK. Think about who you are now to become who you want to be. You have a low GPA. OK. Hang around 5 intelligent people that are in your classes. You work at random tutoring jobs. OK. Maybe talk to those intelligent people (or others) for more job opportunities. She's just way out of your league. OK. I mean. Bullshit. Don't accept that, after awhile of investing in yourself.. you'll realize you aren't the "lucky one" anymore, and now she's the "lucky one".
FFGenerations
Profile Blog Joined April 2011
7088 Posts
September 16 2014 19:35 GMT
#15
people get divorced all the time man
hang in there
Cool BW Music Vid - youtube.com/watch?v=W54nlqJ-Nx8 ~~~~~ ᕤ OYSTERS ᕤ CLAMS ᕤ AND ᕤ CUCKOLDS ᕤ ~~~~~~ ༼ ᕤ◕◡◕ ༽ᕤ PUNCH HIM ༼ ᕤ◕◡◕ ༽ᕤ
SFDuality
Profile Joined December 2012
United States1318 Posts
September 16 2014 20:53 GMT
#16
On September 17 2014 04:35 FFGenerations wrote:
people get divorced all the time man
hang in there

That's very supportive, but probably in a bad way.

I kind of know what you're going through. I took a long time to get over my 6th grade crush. But then (seemingly serendipitously) I met her after a decade and realized that we had absolutely nothing in common anymore. We tend to build up our first "love", especially if it was unrequited, to unrealistic ideals which very rarely match the truth. As others have suggested, you should talk to her. Not romantically, but just in an old-friends-catching-up kind of way. It'll give you some closure, and you'll probably realize that she and the image in your head aren't really the same person at all.

Good luck, man. Not just with the girl, but with college and everything.
LockeTazeline
Profile Blog Joined June 2012
2390 Posts
September 16 2014 22:50 GMT
#17
There's absolutely no reason for you to even be thinking about his person. You don't know who she is in the slightest. Fantasizing about someone who you don't even have a friendly relationship with is just setting yourself back. You should move on and try to forget about her and eventually the feelings will fade.
BigFan
Profile Blog Joined December 2010
TLADT24920 Posts
September 16 2014 23:31 GMT
#18
I'm gonna echo what everyone else said. This was over 10 years back when you weren't even teenagers yet. That's such a long time back that it feels odd to me that you would have such a strong emotion from back then especially considering that you haven't talked to her since. Anyways, she's likely a totally different person than you imagine since you don't know much about her and likely just have your own thoughts on what she is like etc...

I would just focus on getting your GPA up and achieving your dream then after life is going well, you can start looking around. If it bothers you that much that you can't forget about her, shooting her a message to catch up and then you'll see that she's different than you imagined which should help. Best of luck!
Former BW EiC"Watch Bakemonogatari or I will kill you." -Toad, April 18th, 2017
DoctorHelvetica
Profile Blog Joined July 2008
United States15034 Posts
September 17 2014 00:14 GMT
#19
On September 16 2014 20:34 Garnet wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 16 2014 18:48 ilovezil wrote:
Logically, I agree with the other posts regarding the fact that it's been so long and that realistically, you're probably in love with this image you built of her since then, and throughout the years.

However, I do think that's quite amazing also that you've held this love for such a long time. I honestly didn't even think people could hold such affections for that long of a time. I'd say that you should make an active effort to at least reach out to this person. Whether or not you decide to pursue your feelings, I think you should at least come to a conclusion, since it's clear you've held onto these feelings for such a long time. So confess your feelings, have a good talk with her, something to close this matter. Of course, in the off chance it does work out, it would turn out to be quite a love story as well, one that a small part of me is hoping would work.

Like poster above said, she's already in a relationship. But yeah if I see her I will make an active effort to talk to her, see if she's still that girl from my childhood or has become someone else.

Ten years later? Dude, you don't even know her at this point. Why would you want her, an adult woman, to be the same as she was as a kid? You gotta move on and try to fight the oneitis.
RIP Aaliyah
DepressedOne
Profile Blog Joined September 2014
United States190 Posts
September 17 2014 01:23 GMT
#20
I don't think true love exists or there's just someone who's perfect for you in the world. I mean, sure you meet someone who you're totally into and think you could never be with anyone else but those feelings subside. They've lasted 16 years with you though so. Hum. Strange case.
Me sad.
DarkNetHunter
Profile Joined October 2012
1224 Posts
September 17 2014 03:20 GMT
#21
Get in touch with her, find out what kind of person she is now, see if she's happy, get closure or get opportunity, either way, finish this dream sequence so you can walk new dreams.

Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live long enough to make them all yourself.
quirinus
Profile Blog Joined May 2007
Croatia2489 Posts
Last Edited: 2014-09-17 08:07:21
September 17 2014 08:02 GMT
#22
Find another girl. You'll see that when that happens, thoughts about this one girl will start to fade away, along with your infatuation. They'll still probably remain, but more like a good memory than an obsession.

Don't bring girls up on a pedestal. That shit can fuck you up good if you don't know what you're doing.

Have fun with other girls, talk to them, make friends, you don't even need to hit on them, go out with them. Once you start doing this, you'll probably end up liking some friend of theirs. When you do, don't dawdle - go for it with all your mind.

Your world seems narrow right now, but you have to go out there, trust me, there's many amazing girls like that one. Even more amazing. You just have to let loose and find them.

edit:
Oh yea, and concentrate on your life and yourself. When your life is going well, usually good stuff will start happening almost on their own, including girls.
All candles lit within him, and there was purity. | First auto-promoted BW LP editor.
Garnet
Profile Blog Joined February 2006
Vietnam9021 Posts
September 17 2014 10:04 GMT
#23
Thanks everyone for your advice. I have decided to make it a life goal to meet her at least once, doesn't matter if she's married or not. Like you guys said I need a closure. But this will be a non-important priority, since I'm already too late to have any real chance with her.

I guess the 10-year-old her was perfect for the 10-year-old me, but that's it. I was too naive back then and didn't know anything about "relationships". Maybe I was so obsessed with her because it was my first love, and there was no ending so I just lingered on for so damn long. I wish I had a time machine so I can go back to that time again, it was definitely the best period of my life.

Time to focus on my life I guess. Lots of pretty girls in this school.......
Capped
Profile Blog Joined June 2011
United Kingdom7236 Posts
September 17 2014 15:14 GMT
#24
You get alot of this kind of thing with teenagers (say 14-18) but 10? Thats pretty damn young lel.

Useless wet fish.
FFGenerations
Profile Blog Joined April 2011
7088 Posts
September 17 2014 15:49 GMT
#25
just find a different 10 year old....
Cool BW Music Vid - youtube.com/watch?v=W54nlqJ-Nx8 ~~~~~ ᕤ OYSTERS ᕤ CLAMS ᕤ AND ᕤ CUCKOLDS ᕤ ~~~~~~ ༼ ᕤ◕◡◕ ༽ᕤ PUNCH HIM ༼ ᕤ◕◡◕ ༽ᕤ
Frumpysnoo
Profile Blog Joined April 2011
United States247 Posts
Last Edited: 2014-09-17 20:07:24
September 17 2014 20:05 GMT
#26
Idk bro. The last time you guys had contact you were 10 years old in elementary school. I'm being completely honest, and I'm sorry if it comes across really shitty, but this is borderline creeper. If you're looking her up and reminiscing the "times" you had in middle school, feeling empty and sad because of pictures of her and her boyfriend/fiance - that's a bit out of line. You should message her, see how she's doing and if she remembers your old friendship. But don't overstep your boundaries, especially if she has someone in her life right now. You're not feeling anything because you don't have the right to feel anything about seeing her grown and having a life with someone. She's a completely different person now compared to her 10 year old self, and I imagine you are too.

In all honesty, and it's been said before in this already, I feel that you're just in love with the idea of her. I also liked a couple of girls very much when I was in elementary school, as did just about every other person. I even had a few dreams as well about them as I was growing up. But if you're 22, and you're reminiscing the "relationship" you've had with your 10 year old friend... again I'm not trying to be rude, especially in your blog, but these aren't healthy thoughts. I imagine she would be very creeped out if she read this.
Garnet
Profile Blog Joined February 2006
Vietnam9021 Posts
September 19 2014 14:07 GMT
#27
On September 18 2014 00:49 FFGenerations wrote:
just find a different 10 year old....

But I'm 22 now.
Garnet
Profile Blog Joined February 2006
Vietnam9021 Posts
September 19 2014 14:11 GMT
#28
On September 18 2014 05:05 Frumpysnoo wrote:
Idk bro. The last time you guys had contact you were 10 years old in elementary school. I'm being completely honest, and I'm sorry if it comes across really shitty, but this is borderline creeper. If you're looking her up and reminiscing the "times" you had in middle school, feeling empty and sad because of pictures of her and her boyfriend/fiance - that's a bit out of line. You should message her, see how she's doing and if she remembers your old friendship. But don't overstep your boundaries, especially if she has someone in her life right now. You're not feeling anything because you don't have the right to feel anything about seeing her grown and having a life with someone. She's a completely different person now compared to her 10 year old self, and I imagine you are too.

In all honesty, and it's been said before in this already, I feel that you're just in love with the idea of her. I also liked a couple of girls very much when I was in elementary school, as did just about every other person. I even had a few dreams as well about them as I was growing up. But if you're 22, and you're reminiscing the "relationship" you've had with your 10 year old friend... again I'm not trying to be rude, especially in your blog, but these aren't healthy thoughts. I imagine she would be very creeped out if she read this.

I figured so after reading the comments here. I'm just gonna try to talk to her one more time, make it a bucket list thing or smt (but not on Facebook, I can't feel anything through texts).
FFGenerations
Profile Blog Joined April 2011
7088 Posts
September 19 2014 14:46 GMT
#29
On September 19 2014 23:07 Garnet wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 18 2014 00:49 FFGenerations wrote:
just find a different 10 year old....

But I'm 22 now.


22/7+7 = 10
Cool BW Music Vid - youtube.com/watch?v=W54nlqJ-Nx8 ~~~~~ ᕤ OYSTERS ᕤ CLAMS ᕤ AND ᕤ CUCKOLDS ᕤ ~~~~~~ ༼ ᕤ◕◡◕ ༽ᕤ PUNCH HIM ༼ ᕤ◕◡◕ ༽ᕤ
Garnet
Profile Blog Joined February 2006
Vietnam9021 Posts
September 29 2014 15:25 GMT
#30
On September 19 2014 23:46 FFGenerations wrote:
Show nested quote +
On September 19 2014 23:07 Garnet wrote:
On September 18 2014 00:49 FFGenerations wrote:
just find a different 10 year old....

But I'm 22 now.


22/7+7 = 10

dat math.
ahswtini
Profile Blog Joined June 2008
Northern Ireland22208 Posts
September 30 2014 10:11 GMT
#31
She probably doesn't even remember you
"As I've said, balance isn't about strategies or counters, it's about probability and statistics." - paralleluniverse
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