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Going to keep this short...
I transferred to my current university from another college. So basically this semester (as you can see from my previous blog) I got a 2.17 GPA. In the summer I took the same number of credits and got a 3.2. This puts me at a 2.68 cumulative GPA.
It's not that I didn't study. But I definitely didn't understand a lot of stuff even after studying for hours and couldn't get the concepts many times. I could prepare all I wanted but walking into the exam room made me almost forget everything instantly. I know for a fact that plenty of people spent less time studying than I did and got much better grades than me. So I am apparently doing something wrong but I have no idea exactly what.
My parents are ready to kick me out of the house at this point. Before when I used to get bad grades my dad would chase me around the house and try to physically attack me. But now he has gotten older. He shows his sadness and frustration and anger in other ways. He told me that when he was young, his father would make him stand outside the house on a cold winter day for 10 minutes wearing only underwear.
Before this I had a part time job at Target where I enjoyed the experience of minimum wage. I have an uncle who is the same age as my dad who works as a teacher at a school for disabled children during the day and as a cashier at a supermarket during the night. He is divorced now but still makes barely enough to support himself and pay his bills even living in a tiny apartment in a bad neighborhood.
My parents are giving me one last chance. They constantly remind me that they are paying for half my college tuition and the other half I have to pay back in student debt. My father has stopped talking to me now, but before when he was still talking to me, he said that since he is paying for half my education through his pocket, unless I get a 3.7 GPA next semester, he will make me drop out of college and find a job. What he specifically says is that he doesn't feel like flushing his money down the toilet anymore and if I live in his house I have to follow his rules (dorms are expensive so I commute daily by train which is still expensive but slightly less so). He also said that he never buys lunch or coffee at his office because he thinks about how to invest that money in me and my younger brother. The only job I can get is a minimum wage job. Unless I get the grades he wants me to get, he will stop paying and I will have to pay these student loans without a job.
I really don't know what to do right now...
 
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Talk to a counselor. I cant give much advise myself but that is all i got.
Also even with many hours of studying maybe the course you are currently in is to difficult for you and you should consider changing path. That or try finding a group of people to study with, that seems to help if you find the right groupe.
Thats all I got.
HF GL!
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Bro, you can't give up yet. You can get that 3.7 next semester. You can turn things around. Don't mistake the pebble for a boulder. There is nothing stopping you from getting the grades you need. However, even if you do not get the grades and God forbid you are kicked out, it's not the end. It's the start of a new adventure. Uni is not for everyone and that's okay. You can make ends meet by going a different path. Oh, and I don't think your parents will actually kick you out and let you starve or freeze to death.
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Suck it up and work harder. You're getting an amazing leg up and most students would gladly switch places with you. Half your tuition covered? Also, are you paying rent, or chipping in for groceries, or any other bills your parents pay for? 'Cause if not, then you're in a dream situation.
Find a job, work your ass off, and get the grades. You can do it if you truly want. You clearly don't have any mental problems so this bullshit excuse of forgetting things in the exam room just comes off as lazy.
You just have to want it bad enough. When I graduated from high school, I got kicked out of the house, moved in with some friends, worked night shifts at Wal-Mart, and was only able to initially take two courses a semester. But I wanted it bad enough and I stuck with it.
Honestly, you just sound spoiled.
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On December 27 2013 13:56 Fumanchu wrote:
Suck it up and work harder. You're getting an amazing leg up and most students would gladly switch places with you. Half your tuition covered? Also, are you paying rent, or chipping in for groceries, or any other bills your parents pay for? 'Cause if not, then you're in a dream situation.
Find a job, work your ass off, and get the grades. You can do it if you truly want. You clearly don't have any mental problems so this bullshit excuse of forgetting things in the exam room just comes off as lazy.
You just have to want it bad enough. When I graduated from high school, I got kicked out of the house, moved in with some friends, worked night shifts at Wal-Mart, and was only able to initially take two courses a semester. But I wanted it bad enough and I stuck with it.
Honestly, you just sound spoiled.
You don't know the guy.
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On December 27 2013 14:03 Djzapz wrote:Show nested quote +On December 27 2013 13:56 Fumanchu wrote:
Suck it up and work harder. You're getting an amazing leg up and most students would gladly switch places with you. Half your tuition covered? Also, are you paying rent, or chipping in for groceries, or any other bills your parents pay for? 'Cause if not, then you're in a dream situation.
Find a job, work your ass off, and get the grades. You can do it if you truly want. You clearly don't have any mental problems so this bullshit excuse of forgetting things in the exam room just comes off as lazy.
You just have to want it bad enough. When I graduated from high school, I got kicked out of the house, moved in with some friends, worked night shifts at Wal-Mart, and was only able to initially take two courses a semester. But I wanted it bad enough and I stuck with it.
Honestly, you just sound spoiled. You don't know the guy.
Yeah. Stop being mean.
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Ask for help from your professors, and find a group to do homework with. You can work on the answers together and make sure everybody understands the concepts. If someone takes too long to learn a concept, that person can make a note to ask the professor about it sometime after the homework group is done working together.
Spend more time just reading the textbook, doing practice problems, and working out concepts. Sometimes the fundamentals are the most important things to understand fully when trying to learn later concepts that build on the fundamentals and previous concepts. At least, that's how it was in engineering.
If you're in a situation where you don't have to pay the loans unless you drop out of college or graduate, I suggest not dropping out. That's what I did, because I had the bright idea to try becoming an entrepreneur. Well, I do have some passive income and I get by, but I still have to work just like everybody else. I can't say I'd much rather be working as an engineer as it doesn't particularly align with my life goals (which are quite ambitious), but it wouldn't hurt to have the dough.
If you're lazy by nature and aren't moving towards your life goals, it doesn't matter whether your degree fits with your goals, because you'll never reach them anyway without some big changes in perspective and mindset. I know from experience. So if you're lazy like me, definitely go for the cash degree.
Edit:
On December 27 2013 13:56 Fumanchu wrote:
You just have to want it bad enough. When I graduated from high school, I got kicked out of the house, moved in with some friends, worked night shifts at Wal-Mart, and was only able to initially take two courses a semester. But I wanted it bad enough and I stuck with it.
Just curious, how long did it take you to graduate?
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Don't listen to fumanchu...that was horrible advice.
I agree that you should probably talk to a counsellor at your university, they generally can offer you all the options available to students. You should be able to complete your degree as a part time student if its anything like what we have in Canada, and if that degree isn't for you you may be able to find a similar one that is a better fit for your talents. Its all about finding what you're really interested in doing.
Going through school may take some more time, but when you're working it should give you time to think about what path you want to go through. Remember that there are lots of people who go back to school many times to get multiple degrees, some of them end up in wildly different fields after graduating. Some others work their way up a company from the very bottom.
Don't despair, there are lots of possibilities. I think the best is to prepare for some work, and to look into part-time studies (or full time if you can actually make enough money over a summer period!). Hopefully you can meet some people in school or at work to make friends with that will help you through it all. Good luck!!!
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If people are doing better with less preparation time they probably have a stronger background. Review the basics, study hard obviously, see your university tutors and etc etc etc. You got a 3.2 last semester, that's acceptable (probably about average depending on where you go). Keep improving, college is a four year thing and it takes some degree of practice to get the hang of. As for anxiety, I made a playlist of songs I found calming and played it everytime I was studying and before exams. That settled me enough that I could perform.
Lastly your dad sounds like a dickhead; the shit that you describe is twisted and childish but I've unfortunately heard similar from a number of Asian parents. I think the worst part though it how unhelpful it is, you've been having anxiety problems so he heaps on the pressure? Brilliant. If you're already taking loans it sounds like it might worthwhile for you live in the dorms away from your home environment. You seem to understand the importance of your education, you don't need him hounding over you :/ Happy holidays
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Switch to an easy major like elementary education...
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On December 27 2013 14:29 remedium wrote:
Switch to an easy major like elementary education...
I'm in Accounting so this really should not be that hard. My dad seems to think that since I was good at math (I did well in calculus) this should be easy because accounting is only "adding and subtracting numbers". But it can be pretty confusing and complicated at times. I see plenty of girls here who don't seem the brightest and I bet even they're doing better than me
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On December 27 2013 14:34 NeuroticPsychosis wrote:Show nested quote +On December 27 2013 14:29 remedium wrote:
Switch to an easy major like elementary education... I'm in Accounting so this really should not be that hard. My dad seems to think that since I was good at math (I did well in calculus) this should be easy because accounting is only "adding and subtracting numbers". But it can be pretty confusing and complicated at times. I see plenty of girls here who don't seem the brightest and I bet even they're doing better than me
accounting....not that hard.....accounting is a lot of tedius work, which I'm sure youve learned by now. It is all about adding, subtracting, dividng, and multiplication. The hard part though is to do what with which numbers
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I think the advice to find a study group, work with your teachers, and talk to a counselor are gold. The biggest problem is that your trying to tackle everything by yourself, but there are huge resources that just need to be tapped.
Also, if you play sc2, you definitely have the fortitude to work on complex problems doggedly.
Do it 
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I'm in a similar situation to yours, actually, but at a different stage.
With me, I didn't make the transition well from senior year of high school to college, so it was at a point where I failed my first year and barely adjusted my second year (personal issues beyond my circumstances and anyone's predictions). So I was working with a 2.09 GPA at the start of my junior year and my parents also gave me the same ultimatum that you received, especially after I lost my scholarships. That was four years ago. Now? I struggled, and I'm still struggling, trying to maintain a 3.5 GPA (since the start of junior year up until now) and 2 jobs because my parents followed through with their threat, but I'm mostly self-sufficient now and set to graduate finally this upcoming spring. So if someone like me can do it, I have faith that you can do it too. But don't do it for your dad; do this for yourself. Don't focus on others; let them worry about their own problems. Be selfish in this sense.
Now, in terms of getting your grade up, like others have said, talk to your professors and your peers for assistance with schoolwork. I understand that being a commuter, it's difficult for you to connect with others, especially those who dorm, but there are ways to connect. For example, my school has Facebook groups for different subjects; people post study session times and they ask each other stuff all the time.
Or, if your class has TAs, you can ask your TA for help. Often, they're more helpful than professors, because from my experience, some of my professors are difficult to understand because they had thick accents, and they were more researchers than teachers, so they weren't exactly adequately prepared with helping a student.
You also have the entire Internet at your disposal. You make a decent number of blog posts. You could always post questions asking for some help for a subject you don't know about, and work your way from there. Or Google it. For example, I just did a really quick Google search on "online resources accounting", and this was the first link:
http://www.accountingcoach.com/ (just to show a point; not saying you HAVE to use this)
While I may not know whether or not you research online, I'm just listing it as an option you could hopefully take.
In terms of your financial situation, there are a few things you can do. The first and foremost, aside from applying for grants and loans is to actually become a RA. I may not know if this is a universal thing, but RAs do get free room and board with a few other perks. Secondly, it enables you to live on campus, which in turn, grants you a lot more access to the student population and hours in which to study. However, being a RA is a highly sought after position in college, so make sure you take the time next semester to network, especially with residence hall directors and other RAs, and show that you are an individual with character and leadership.
Another option which I considered was to join the military to alleviate the financial cost. Depending on which state you live in, your tuition can be paid for entirely, but it comes with a steep investment in time and dedication; for example, the ROTC, from what I've heard, demands that you serve for a certain number of years in the military. So this may not be for you, depending on your circumstances. Do some research and speak with a representative (although you should take this lightly, because after all, it IS their job to try and recruit you).
But whatever you choose to do, remember that it's ultimately all your responsibility. I read through your previous blog, and I agree that you need to drop the mentality of blaming others and taking solace in the fact that your classmates are doing just as badly. It's not healthy or conducive at all. Furthermore, take your mistakes and use them as stepping stones to ensure that you DON'T repeat them.
Good luck, I hope you a lot of future success in your situation, and happy holidays!
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Try what the other guys said. But if all else fails, Photoshop your report card to show your parents an acceptable grade, since you already tried your best, but they are being so unreasonable (last resort only!)
So many terrible parents don't realise that encouragement and help work better than threat of punishment for matters of ability such as grades.
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Some decent advice in here, but really your despair doesn't match your situation. I understand that you don't have a lot of life perspective and that your reality can feel very burdensome, but you're in a good situation. You can make the situation into what you want and all you have to do is make decisions and work hard.
Just realize that you're problems are as big as you make them out to be. The true issue here is your take on your situation.
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On December 27 2013 14:11 Azera wrote:Show nested quote +On December 27 2013 14:03 Djzapz wrote:On December 27 2013 13:56 Fumanchu wrote:
Suck it up and work harder. You're getting an amazing leg up and most students would gladly switch places with you. Half your tuition covered? Also, are you paying rent, or chipping in for groceries, or any other bills your parents pay for? 'Cause if not, then you're in a dream situation.
Find a job, work your ass off, and get the grades. You can do it if you truly want. You clearly don't have any mental problems so this bullshit excuse of forgetting things in the exam room just comes off as lazy.
You just have to want it bad enough. When I graduated from high school, I got kicked out of the house, moved in with some friends, worked night shifts at Wal-Mart, and was only able to initially take two courses a semester. But I wanted it bad enough and I stuck with it.
Honestly, you just sound spoiled. You don't know the guy. Yeah. Stop being mean.
I don't have to know the guy, it's the same situation for everyone.
If you want something bad enough, you get it. 99% of the population is perfectly capable of achieving their goals, if they're willing to work hard, sacrifice, and keep at it regardless of how long it takes. You can sugar coat things, and give him encouraging words, and be a, "nice guy", all you want. The only thing that's going to make a difference if he makes a choice within himself that this something that he really wants, and he's going to stop at nothing to get it.
Your situation in life might differ from the next person. Your home life might be more difficult. Your ability to grasp concepts and new ideas might be found lacking in comparison to your peers. You might struggle financially. Everyone has their own demons. Once you decide, and truly decide that it's something that you want, you will get it. It WILL become yours. You will find the way to make things work. There is, almost literally, nothing out of your reach. It's certainly not easy, but it's definitely that simple.
On December 27 2013 14:12 hp.Shell wrote:Edit: Show nested quote +On December 27 2013 13:56 Fumanchu wrote:
You just have to want it bad enough. When I graduated from high school, I got kicked out of the house, moved in with some friends, worked night shifts at Wal-Mart, and was only able to initially take two courses a semester. But I wanted it bad enough and I stuck with it. Just curious, how long did it take you to graduate?
It took me 4 1/2 years to achieve a criminology diploma, which at the time was the basic requirement for enrolling to be a commissioned police office in the lower fraser valley. It's normally a 2 year program.
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Fumanchu is right about the spoiled part, but because he didn't put any effort into communicating in a way that is actually helpful his post was reduced mostly to "being an asshole".
Case closed, moving on...
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On December 27 2013 13:56 Fumanchu wrote:
Suck it up and work harder. You're getting an amazing leg up and most students would gladly switch places with you. Half your tuition covered? Also, are you paying rent, or chipping in for groceries, or any other bills your parents pay for? 'Cause if not, then you're in a dream situation.
Find a job, work your ass off, and get the grades. You can do it if you truly want. You clearly don't have any mental problems so this bullshit excuse of forgetting things in the exam room just comes off as lazy.
You just have to want it bad enough. When I graduated from high school, I got kicked out of the house, moved in with some friends, worked night shifts at Wal-Mart, and was only able to initially take two courses a semester. But I wanted it bad enough and I stuck with it.
Honestly, you just sound spoiled.
To be honest, I think this is the best advise possible. Everything else on this thread isn't actually advise at all, it's just common words of encouragement which get everybody nowhere. College experience isn't meant to be what many people make it. You are supposed to work; you are supposed to struggle.
The only thing I would add to Fumanchu's comment is, when you know who your professors are, immediately find someone who had them and find out what their exams are like. Study your professor before you step one foot into their class, and you'll know what information is most important to know for the test.
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On December 27 2013 15:48 CecilSunkure wrote:
Fumanchu is right about the spoiled part, but because he didn't put any effort into communicating in a way that is actually helpful his post was reduced mostly to "being an asshole".
Case closed, moving on...
sometimes you dont know you miss it until its already gone
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EPT
