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Okay... so you guys might remember my post a few days ago about myself debating whether or not to write about E-Sports in my college application essay...I decided against that because the topic is way too big for 500 words to explain.
Anyway... I talked to a stranger yesterday. He is a UC San Diego student... and he gave me some ideas. First off, here is the prompt I need to address:
Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud and how does it relate to the person you are?
Here is how the conversation went:
Him: and for your 2nd prompt
any ideas for that yet
i'd probably write about League of Legends and being within the top whatever % of 30 million players
something like that
or starcraft or cod
whatever makes yous tand out
bìrdkicker (9:19): i was a grandmaster in starcraft
Him (9:19): and you cant put on your application
Lol holy fuk
what is that
bìrdkicker (9:19): lol
Him (9:19): top 200?
bìrdkicker (9:19): yes
Him (9:19): play with TLO and ****
bìrdkicker (9:19): when i was in 9th grade
Him (9:19): yea
write about that
thats really good
bìrdkicker (9:19): uh.. i played idra, incontrol, scarlett, whole bunch of people
Him (9:19): yea
write about that
bìrdkicker (9:19): Im worried that the readers have no idea
what im talking about
Him (9:19): thats actually a VERY good
nah
they will
bìrdkicker (9:20): and t hey will just label me as some nerd that plays video games
for fun
Him (9:20): nope
write about how
well
if you're a good writer you can make anything soudn gr8
period
think about it
9th grade
playing with top players in the WORLD
whom make it a profession
comparable to being a 9th grader
playing with NBA players
it's just an accomplishment
it relates to the person you are because
you practiced
your way to the top
bìrdkicker (9:21): but the reader has no idea what esports is, so wouldnt they think that the players who play this professionally
Him (9:22): Lol
it doesnt ******* matter
you're not writing indepth about the game
youre not saying
oh blah blah
zerglings
blah blah
hydras
blah blah thor makes me gr8 and a good student
bìrdkicker (9:22): yeah but if i didn't know anything about esports and im just another ignorant person, I'd think that professionals in esports is just another nerd who got good at a game and is playing it for a living
idk o_o
Him (9:23): then you shouldnt be going to college
where its a liberal place
full of open-minded people
if you're going to judge others that way
being in the top 0.01% of any game sport or whatever
is ******* accomplishing
bìrdkicker (9:24): you're right, sorry about that... I just think that I should view the admissions reader as a complete stranger... they can be liberal, ignorant, w/e thats why I thought of appealing to them in a more
standard way
Him: (9:25): standard = rejection
bìrdkicker (9:25): but i see where you are coming from... I think I'll write about starcraft
Him: (9:25): you should write about starcraft
lol
So... Y/N for starcraft essay? I was GM in Season 3. I think the youngest north american player to hit grandmaster... pokebunny was older than me by one year.
Also, I altered and improved my first essay from his advice, which talked about my struggles with a language barrier between me and my parents.If anyone could be kind enough to give me their input on it, just tell me and I'll PM the essay to you... I don't really want to bother the guy more because he sounds like a busy person and I don't even know him that well.
  
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Can you tie this essay in to your future major or profession in any way? You want it to be relevant to why you're applying to college.
If you can, then sure, why the hell not.
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On October 16 2013 13:03 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:
Can you tie this essay in to your future major or profession in any way? You want it to be relevant to why you're applying to college.
If you can, then sure, why the hell not.
UC personal statements don't ask for major/future profession unless if you are a transfer student. I am an incoming freshman. I think the goal with this essay and what the person wanted me to do is to basically tie starcraft into some good qualities thats relate to it, such as my ambition (my friends didnt think I can do it, but I was determined to get it), perseverance, and my ability to work my way up from ground up. I think this all shows a characteristic of someone who is determined to fight through struggles (college) to become successful and someone who is independent-minded, which I think can be attractive to colleges.
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On October 16 2013 13:22 birdkicker wrote:Show nested quote +On October 16 2013 13:03 DarkPlasmaBall wrote:
Can you tie this essay in to your future major or profession in any way? You want it to be relevant to why you're applying to college.
If you can, then sure, why the hell not. UC personal statements don't ask for major/future profession unless if you are a transfer student. I am an incoming freshman. I think the goal with this essay and what the person wanted me to do is to basically tie starcraft into some good qualities thats relate to it, such as my ambition (my friends didnt think I can do it, but I was determined to get it), perseverance, and my ability to work my way up from ground up. I think this all shows a characteristic of someone who is determined to fight through struggles (college) to become successful and someone who is independent-minded, which I think can be attractive to colleges.
It's never harmful to tie it into the future if you can.  Forward-thinking people are usually attractive to colleges.
Okay, that being said, the problem is that there are a ton of topics that can be used to illustrate the exact same points, and those other topics won't carry with them the negative connotation that video games possess. Starcraft can certainly make you "stand out," but not necessarily in a good way. If they got an essay about someone being bullied for being fat and then persevering in losing a ton of weight vs. youngest GM in Starcraft for one season -- well, which one do you think will get the nod?
I don't mean to be discouraging -- I also wrote about a video game in my application back when I applied -- but if you're going to write about Starcraft, make sure that it leads somewhere ... different to balance it out. Somewhere that'll make them sit up and go, "Oh, I never thought about it that way."
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I still feel like you're going to have to do so much explanation for them to get why this means anything more that "I'm good at computer games" . For context, I tried to write an essay several times about my experience in debate (one of the top teams in the country my senior year) but the topic is too obscure to really write about in 500 words.
Another thing you may want to consider. Its kind of hard to write an essay about such a long term event like being in GM and have it not just sound like a documentary. You want the essay to have a sort of "plot" and it might be difficult to do that without getting specifically into games.
Lastly, this sort of depends where you're applying and for what program, but the general opinion of video games is not that great. Most people simply don't see them as a pastime that takes effort and dedication to succeed at and will write it off as basically the equivalent of playing a lot of mario. Unless you can be pretty sure that the people who are reading these are relatively young and open minded, I'd say its a better bet to go for something else.
Of course, all of this depends on you having a something else. If you've really got no other major achievements to write about then this might be the best option, but I'm guessing you wouldn't be asking if you didn't think there was probably a safer choice.
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Hong Kong9154 Posts
if you have to ask if its a good idea, you probably aren't capable of pulling it off in the first place.
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College admission essay is a great chance to not write about video games
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You should probably show that you are more interested in other subjects rather than in video games.
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I don't think having a major part of your essay be "I was really really good at computer games and I spent a lot of time playing" will help you out very much (unless it's related to your future career)
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On October 16 2013 16:05 cam connor wrote:
College admission essay is a great chance to not write about video games
Not gonna lie, many moons ago when I was applying for college, I wrote an essay about a Warcraft III match for one of my safety schools. I had a lot of fun writing that essay actually and wish I had used it for some of my reach schools where I was ultimately rejected anyway.
Moral of the story: wrote from the heart, still got in.
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i promise you your wc3 essay wouldnt have gotten you in anywhere that you didnt get into off the rest of your application
here let me tell you something i heard from a friend who worked in MIT admissions office for a couple of years
do you think you're special or unique or eye catching for writing about video games? you're not. hundreds of applicants write about it every year (at MIT, which might be reflective of its applicants' demographic, but the point stands), there is nothing fresh or exciting or novel about it lol
if it's a good essay on its own merits by all means submit it, but don't make the assumption that subject matter will do you any favors
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On October 16 2013 21:36 Vegetarian Wolf wrote:
i promise you your wc3 essay wouldnt have gotten you in anywhere that you didnt get into off the rest of your application
here let me tell you something i heard from a friend who worked in MIT admissions office for a couple of years
do you think you're special or unique or eye catching for writing about video games? you're not. hundreds of applicants write about it every year (at MIT, which might be reflective of its applicants' demographic, but the point stands), there is nothing fresh or exciting or novel about it lol
if it's a good essay on its own merits by all means submit it, but don't think the subject matter will do you any favors
No I agree, I don't think it would have mattered one way or the other. My point was actually that you might as well write what you want to write to make the application process less painful.
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On October 16 2013 21:40 c0ldfusion wrote:Show nested quote +On October 16 2013 21:36 Vegetarian Wolf wrote:
i promise you your wc3 essay wouldnt have gotten you in anywhere that you didnt get into off the rest of your application
here let me tell you something i heard from a friend who worked in MIT admissions office for a couple of years
do you think you're special or unique or eye catching for writing about video games? you're not. hundreds of applicants write about it every year (at MIT, which might be reflective of its applicants' demographic, but the point stands), there is nothing fresh or exciting or novel about it lol
if it's a good essay on its own merits by all means submit it, but don't think the subject matter will do you any favors No I agree, I don't think it would have mattered one way or the other. My point was actually that you might as well write what you want to write to make the application process less painful.
well, is his goal to have an enjoyable application process or is his goal to improve his chances of getting admitted...?
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This is a question that really CAN make an applicant stand out with a really good essay, and being the asshole who played a lot of video games isn't going to be the thing that gets you into the school you want to go to.
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If you want to tAlk about video games, use it as a means, not an end. Interested in finance and stocks and trading? "My interest in fast paced video games that require precise and timely decision making helped lead me to exploring areas I could replicate this in my real life. I found this in trading stocks, And have been managing and trading a portfolio for 5 years now, with overall positive returns of ___."
That type of shit, use it to frame something, but don't use it as the skill itself.
Of course you want to put more effort into writing it well than I did just now, but it seems as if you're still on the content decisions rather than the writing decisions.
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On October 16 2013 21:42 Vegetarian Wolf wrote:Show nested quote +On October 16 2013 21:40 c0ldfusion wrote:On October 16 2013 21:36 Vegetarian Wolf wrote:
i promise you your wc3 essay wouldnt have gotten you in anywhere that you didnt get into off the rest of your application
here let me tell you something i heard from a friend who worked in MIT admissions office for a couple of years
do you think you're special or unique or eye catching for writing about video games? you're not. hundreds of applicants write about it every year (at MIT, which might be reflective of its applicants' demographic, but the point stands), there is nothing fresh or exciting or novel about it lol
if it's a good essay on its own merits by all means submit it, but don't think the subject matter will do you any favors No I agree, I don't think it would have mattered one way or the other. My point was actually that you might as well write what you want to write to make the application process less painful. well, is his goal to have an enjoyable application process or is his goal to improve his chances of getting admitted...?
I don't want to delve too much into this but we don't know anything about this kid other than he posts on TL, plays SC2 well and wants to write about it for his admission essay.
In this context I think we can agree that, yes he can write about SC2 provided that he writes it well. If he feels more strongly about another subject matter, by all means.
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I already responded in the first thread, but I found this ironic
"if you're a good writer you can make anything soudn gr8"
careful who you take advice from lol
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I don't generally advocate writing for a specific audience, but this is one of the cases where that's necessary.
Essentially, don't write about anything that a middle aged woman won't like and you're fine.
If you can make playing SC2 sound interesting to a middle aged woman, go ahead and write your essay about that.
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On October 17 2013 01:18 Ettick wrote:
I don't generally advocate writing for a specific audience, but this is one of the cases where that's necessary.
Essentially, don't write about anything that a middle aged woman won't like and you're fine.
If you can make playing SC2 sound interesting to a middle aged woman, go ahead and write your essay about that.
Most essay readers are younger people who only hold the job for a short time before moving on to something bigger.
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Dude, think about how many essays the admissions board has to read. Seriously, out of all of the thousands you are probably the only one who will write about sc or video games. That is a HUGE advantage. You don't want to bore them to death with the usual " i work hard, am good person, like to learn" crap. When they read your essay they want to see
1) how well can you write
2) your personality/character
3) how you can benefit the school
Your job is to convey your LOVE and PASSION about something you care about, how that changed you as a person and finally what you can offer to the school. I did this with chess many years ago, basically just wrote a story about a specific match I played, and even though I had a sub par gpa and average SAT, I got accepted to my reach school no problems.The purpose of the essay is to translate your personality in an authentic way, so do it!
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most ppl think videogames are useles/waste of time. you might want to convey why this is wrong instead of ''bragging'' ( yo im top 200 of something you didnt even know existed 5 mins ago ---- its not me being mean, just try to figure a woman or an older person who never played video games reading your paper...)
and THEN tell them that instead of doing sudoku like a fag you macro like a boss, multitask like a beast and try you best to learn from your errors to make sure you dont fall for the same thing twice.
i think this would be a better way to portray yourself and not sound like a nerd whos afraid of the sun.
In this case I dont think its about being the best of the best, its about showing you are passionate, willing to commit yourself and you are always eager for more knowledge.
my 2 cents, glhf.
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Nah you need to differentiate between your gm being a goal that you achieved, and make it explicit it was not just a video game addiction.
It is an achievement and you need to play it like one. You can touch on the social perception of gaming as a barrier to your goal. That, and balancing school work is a lot of hard work which you would need to display.
If you talk about e sports, you need to portray the culture and community that exists with in it. How many people play/ it's growth in the last 10 years, how you came to be a part of that community.
Like I said, you can write about Starcraft, but your focus point is not the game, it's your achievement within it and how hard you worked to achieve your goal. You definitely need create the context so the reader doesn't jump to conclusions. And don't be afraid to be passionate in your writing about the game, and show the achievement was a big validation of hard work = success
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On October 17 2013 08:52 biology]major wrote:
Dude, think about how many essays the admissions board has to read. Seriously, out of all of the thousands you are probably the only one who will write about sc or video games.
already addressed this, this is false lol
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On October 17 2013 11:02 Vegetarian Wolf wrote:Show nested quote +On October 17 2013 08:52 biology]major wrote:
Dude, think about how many essays the admissions board has to read. Seriously, out of all of the thousands you are probably the only one who will write about sc or video games. already addressed this, this is false lol
But he's one of the few who have made it to grandmaster! So that must carry some uniqueness. I don't know I think its possible he could turn it into something useful; if you frame this game as a legitimate esport requiring training and quick thinking, I wouldn't discount it. Now if it was a generic essay about that awesome game you had in league of legends where you killed three heroes at once with some crazy skills, probably leave that out as its just not that meaningful.
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just write it if u want to write it
99.9% of people outside of tl/internet don't care about sc2/esports in general and ur essay will not change that, so make sure u focus less on the esports aspect of it and more on the personal growth/life lesson part
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EPT
