Funny School Presentations

Hello TL. I had some leftover work that I've done during school in my business and marketing classes that I thought was kinda funny and wanted to share. Not sure if it will translate well online, but people couldn't stop laughing during my presentations so I thought I'd post it and see how it goes.

This is my promotion plan for a business you had to create. It's a PowerPoint so lots of images.

Promotion Plan

+ Show Spoiler +

Got a definite 100 for this one. From thereon in the class, I was recognized as the person who made "Restaurant". Subsequent presentations and skits in that class would usually include references to my business and the enormous wealth it has made me. My marketing teacher in that class was a boss.

In my business class which I had a semester before I had created "Restaurant", we had to write a telemarketing script and a press release for an upcoming business. My teacher was a jerk in that class who assigned a ton of garbage busy work and only checked like half of it. If you finished something and wanted to turn it in early, he'd wave it away without looking at it and tell you it needed more. Knowing he probably wouldn't even look at my work if he did happen to collect it (I don't remember if he did or not) I decided to write it in a completely non-serious way. I changed the name of the business in my press release because it had my last name in it. So here they are:

Telemarketing Script:

Operator: Hello Mr. John Doe, would you be interested in some fresh, healthy, and quick food?
Customer: No. *hangs up phone.

Press Release:

We here at Restaurant are pleased to announce the completion of our two-lane drive-thru. We understand there was a lot of controversy surrounding the completion, what with the numerous hazardous materials used, the casualties involved, and the tearing down of a small forest nowhere in the vicinity of our building to make room for the lanes. But we hope we can move past these accidents, and brighten up your world with the promise of fresh, quick, cheap, and healthy fast food, faster than you could imagine. Our new drive-thru lane shows a lot of promise in our intentions of bringing you your meal in the quickest way possible. Now, instead of taking just a few minutes to order and receive your food (like our slow competitors do), we can take about 30 seconds off. That’s thirty whole seconds that you didn’t have to waste waiting in line behind someone who barely speaks English and is trying to order his meal with his window rolled up.
Now, we understand that the amount of bad press our company has received as been warranted, but we learn from our mistakes. We no longer condone our employees spitting in food, harassing customers, and working in pajamas. We have also raised our sanitation rating to a 70, which is a new high for us. Our current outdoor costumed mascot has been fired and replaced with one that does not actively promote our competitors and perform obscene gestures to potential customers. As you can see, a lot of changes have been made. We hope our past mistakes have not permanently distanced us from the community. We wish to move past these blunders and become a part of the community we want to contribute to and work with.

Lastly, near the end of the year in my marketing class everyone was given a topic from a previous lesson that we had to present to the class. Only a few people actually presented because nobody really cared to listen. Figuring this would be the case, and knowing my teacher wouldn't care if I replaced a bunch of actual information you were supposed to know with nonsense, I made another awesome PowerPoint presentation.

You were supposed to include a warm up, the lesson, an activity, and a wrap-up. None of this was enforced whatsoever but I still included them anyways.

Lesson 4.02 Presentation

+ Show Spoiler +

Unfortunately due to technical error, nobody actually got to see the warmup slide.

This slide had a ton of animation stuff going on that has nothing to do with the presentation. In the animation, a man gets run over and flattened, then an ambulance comes and runs him over too. A jet then ends up crash landing on him causing a huge explosion. Then a fire truck comes and puts it out and runs him over as well.

I put a random picture of my teacher I found on google on this slide lol.

Some of the text got screwed up in Open Office software so I made it more visible. Everything was fine in the presentations though.

I'll just include the answer slides here. The question slides were the same just without the answers underlined.

I liked the answer to this question specifically, so I'll show you guys the question slide first.

At the end of my presentation, which had everyone in hysterics again, my teacher said that was the best presentation he'd ever seen lol. I'm going to miss making whacky presentations for that class.

My friend also came up with some pretty hilarious presentations. One in particular I don't think I'll ever forget.

It was the same kind of presentation as my "Restaurant" one. He would always work with the same person "Reid". Problem with Reid was that he'd never help present as he'd conveniently be absent that day in class. So what my friend Kyle did was scrap the business he and Reid were working on, and insert his own instead. Presentation day comes and, to no one's surprise, Reid isn't there to help present. So Kyle turns on his PowerPoint and we see the business name show up on the screen: Reid's House of Personal Massagers.

Just about in every slide he had some sort of vibrator lol. For advertising he found a billboard and stuck a large "operational" vibrator on it. Then he listed Reid's phone number at the end of the presentation with instructions to "call this number and request a personal massage". Bahahaha.

A few weeks after that, we had another presentation to present a country and it's economic status, imports, exports etc. He chose Columbia of all countries and had entire slides dedicated to it's "main export", cocaine. He had pictures, how much there was estimated to be, it's worth in GDP, etc.

The last one he presented was an energy drink that he made up. It was called NRG Phuk. Haha. He put it up and said the H was silent. His drink was designed to keep you up for 24 hours, a vast improvement from the usual 5 or so hours that regular energy drinks did. They were sold in batches of 7 designed to keep you up for weeks at a time, or you could save and buy the 365 can batch for those that don't sleep. Ingredients included crack, cocaine, unicorn blood, nails, and a whole page full of other ingredients. If anyone in that class thought the ingredients list was long, it paled in comparison to the side effects list. They also had Charlie Sheen as their celebrity endorsement.

As hilarious as making those presentations in that class were, they actually did help me quite a bit in my presenting skills. Knowing I could be creative and not get in trouble, I was able to overcome a lot of my fears of talking in front of others. I learned how to control the crowd, how to make them laugh or pay attention. I learned how to not stumble when presenting. You just have to not think so much about your speech. Just talk, and sound confident (even if you aren't). If you can fake confidence good enough that nobody will notice, then you are confident. That was definitely one of the most important things that that class taught me, and I'm glad I had the chance to take it.

Funny School Presentations

Completed

Ongoing

Upcoming