So this is my first ever blog, hopefully it doesn't suck as I'll get to my current psychological state very shortly :D
I've been thinking quite a bit as of late about the work necessary to really make it in this "eSports" scene. As someone currently in-between being "unknown" and "mainstream," I've noticed a few very interesting things about the way people perceive things on the outside, and the way things seem to actually work.
I sit here typing this after being awake for about 18 or so hours. This is basically the schedule I've adopted as of late to accommodate consumption of information that is relevant to my job (watching SPL/GSL/GSTL etc), while being able to cast the few European-timed matches I can get before falling asleep.
To start off: I am NOT a well-off individual. In fact, I am only able to do this thanks to the kindness of strangers as well as support from a few very close people in my life. What little money I make from advertisements or donations almost exclusively goes towards food shopping, paying bills and after that I give all excess back to the community through TwitchTV subscriptions or projects like the ROOT fundraiser.
When I began my journey to become a professional StarCraft player, the first thing I did was reach out to players and team managers way outside of my league. I've always felt one of the best ways to improve is to set a high bar and keep pushing yourself until you can reach it. Through my interactions at Pro-gaming events and after going through several teams I feel most people would be shocked to know how little some of their favourite foreign players actually practice in a given week or day to day basis. Sometimes this is due to scheduling conflicts or other obligations, but for the most part I feel this is simply a lack of either motivation or work ethic.
The level of commitment required to make it is extraordinarily high for most fields in this industry. The lack of resources for committing to one's goals has completely stifled the NA scene, for example. Very recently I was speaking with a professional player who was basing their entire decision on practicing for a whole week on whether they believed they could make a decent run in the North American WCS qualifier.
I will say that the WCS motivated even myself to try to get back into seriously practicing 8~ hours a day. I was going to make a run at the EU qualifiers but couldn't justify the further lack of sleep and decided I would try for NA anyway. Of course this presents a conflicted interest as I've also been doing everything I can get work casting the event, which brings me to the reality of my situation.
I used to do volunteer work for 14 hours a day for local public services such as fire departments. I've spent countless months training and preparing for athletic events and have spent many an evening with my nose in legal material to prepare for court cases that weren't even real. I'm not a man afraid of hard work, but good god there is nothing more taxing to me than what I do every day trying to find ways to succeed in eSports. In fact, the only reason I'm writing this is so I don't have to say I skipped sleep just to sit in a chat channel praying for an official caster to no-show so I could cast an event I'm listed as "low priority" for.
The simple truth is, neither of us are being paid for this directly. To him, it's just something fun to do and a little bit of work. To me, it's trying to scrape the last remains of peanut butter in the hopes that there some scraps left. Of course I enjoy the work, but to the viewers it comes off as the main caster being a hero for waking up early and the replacement caster "looking tired" because he spent all night awake to make sure he wouldn't be late. And much like the NA players feeling little drive to try competing against the odds in WCS, I know I could do a lot more to improve and try to get forward, but these situations make finding the drive to do all that I can so much more difficult.
Sometimes I feel a little vain but I accept that it's a part of the process of developing in this community, and I in no way will denounce any of the hard work that other casters/personalities have put into the scene. I know I put in a lot of time and haven't gotten where I want to be, but I honestly don't wish things were easier. What keeps me hungry is knowing that with such a difficult barrier-to-entry for any good position in eSports, it's very unlikely anyone will ever make it that hasn't truly earned it. I firmly believe that with enough hard work and dedication I can make it. What's most important for anyone that wants to be a part of this awesome scene is a true dedication to the little people and a deep passion/love for the game.
I love eSports and give it my all, but I am very tired right now. Sorry if this didn't make sense at all but I felt a strike of inspiration to give you guys a different perspective on some things.
I always love watching your casts and you've rapidly become one of my favorite solo casters Best of luck finding work and getting your spot in eSports, I'm sure you'll get there some day!
Hey Nathan! I've got quite a bit I want to say to you about your current position in the scene.
First I want to to say I love you and think you are a fantastic caster. I wouldn't have brought you on to the playhem showmatches or any of the other random crap we do together if I didn't believe that. Every casting gig you have done you have 100% deserved and you do work very hard in the scene. However this is where I take a turn to the negative.
You make posts on twitter, reddit, and now this blog about how hard it is to get into esports, how much time and effort it takes, and how taxing it is to do what you do. Which is 100% true! Any caster at your level stays up late every night, spams tournaments with their resume, and covers random stuff they don't want to just to get their name out there. However, you have only been casting for what...the last 6 months? Compare yourself to 99.9% of the rest of the scene and your fame has been explosive! From the moment you did the IPL casting gig to the proleaugue cast you have been rising in popularity faster than I've seen anyone in the scene. You've done an IEM now, the acer cup, and I would be completely shocked if you weren't doing this coming dreamhack. In all honesty bud you have nothing to ever complain about and should be more than happy with your current position.
The amount of content you have gotten to cover, the amount of fans you have gained, and the opportunities you are on the verge of getting have taken most of the rest of the scene YEARS AND YEARS to get to. The current level of fame you have received since you began casting(ipl5) would make most people extremely happy and content if they did it over a few years and you have done it in a matter of months. This isn't just referring to myself. I have been working with several casters in the scene for years now and comparing the state of your progression in the scene to everyone elses is insane. You are out of control man!
Again let me state you are a fantastic caster and everything you have received you deserve. This is not a jealous caster rant here. Just wanting to put things into perspective for you from someone who is doing the exact thing you are doing for much longer. These negative posts have to stop man. You are growing so fast in the scene faster than almost anyone else has and before long you will have a much more stable job in the scene. Its just very depressing to see someone who has grown so much in such a short amount of time not being 100% content and excited with where he is.
Again love you and again you are a great caster. You have deserved everything so far and will keep growing! Just my two cents.
Zoia
Edit: Not trying to say you don't enjoy what you do of course you do! Also not trying to say you are negative all the time. I just personally feel someone in your current position has no need to be negative at all! Be happy you are in a fantastic position in the scene.
Appreciate the post Nathan. I think Coach Park summed it up pretty well in a recent interview -- the initial work he faced was just getting players to focus. How foreign players can wake up later than 7 AM is beyond me personally -- but than maybe I'm just hard wired to go full force the instant I wake up. This industry like many others requires the extra mile.
So Nathan, to you I say this: MTXE. Mental Toughness, Extra Effort. If you ask yourself at the end of everyday if you are satisfied, and you answer "yes", than that is the point you should leave the industry. Never be satisfied, constantly push forward, so that when you are truly satisfied and truly happy with the results of the tenacity you practice day in and day out, you can leave peacefully and truly on top.
Hey Nathan! I've got quite a bit I want to say to you about your current position in the scene.
First I want to to say I love you and think you are a fantastic caster. I wouldn't have brought you on to the playhem showmatches or any of the other random crap we do together if I didn't believe that. Every casting gig you have done you have 100% deserved and you do work very hard in the scene. However this is where I take a turn to the negative.
You make posts on twitter, reddit, and now this blog about how hard it is to get into esports, how much time and effort it takes, and how taxing it is to do what you do. Which is 100% true! Any caster at your level stays up late every night, spams tournaments with their resume, and covers random stuff they don't want to just to get their name out there. However, you have only been casting for what...the last 6 months? Compare yourself to 99.9% of the rest of the scene and your fame has been explosive! From the moment you did the IPL casting gig to the proleaugue cast you have been rising in popularity faster than I've seen anyone in the scene. You've done an IEM now, the acer cup, and I would be completely shocked if you weren't doing this coming dreamhack. In all honesty bud you have nothing to ever complain about and should be more than happy with your current position.
The amount of content you have gotten to cover, the amount of fans you have gained, and the opportunities you are on the verge of getting have taken most of the rest of the scene YEARS AND YEARS to get to. The current level of fame you have received since you began casting(ipl5) would make most people extremely happy and content if they did it over a few years and you have done it in a matter of months. This isn't just referring to myself. I have been working with several casters in the scene for years now and comparing the state of your progression in the scene to everyone elses is insane. You are out of control man!
Again let me state you are a fantastic caster and everything you have received you deserve. This is not a jealous caster rant here. Just wanting to put things into perspective for you from someone who is doing the exact thing you are doing for much longer. These negative posts have to stop man. You are growing so fast in the scene faster than almost anyone else has and before long you will have a much more stable job in the scene. Its just very depressing to see someone who has grown so much in such a short amount of time not being 100% content and excited with where he is.
Again love you and again you are a great caster. You have deserved everything so far and will keep growing! Just my two cents.
Zoia
Edit: Not trying to say you don't enjoy what you do of course you do! Also not trying to say you are negative all the time. I just personally feel someone in your current position has no need to be negative at all! Be happy you are in a fantastic position in the scene.
I have to agree with a lot of what Zoia is saying. I really enjoy your casts and it's great to have someone with your ability to tune-in to. Keep pushing forward and you'll move up!
I completely agree Zoia, I don't mean to come off as greedy or anything but I guess it's just a reflection of my vaulting ambition. The first thing I was told when I started was that the key ingredient for me would be time, life is just stressful for me at the moment which has a way of making everything seem a bit rougher than it really is. I do have a way of getting ahead of myself ^^
Have you ever thought of running a show like MrBitter, ChanmanV etc.? I feel you need more of your own content to establish a name for yourself, even if they don't have massive viewer. People should say "Cool, another Nathanias cast" and not "I want to watch Proleague/ATC... is there an English stream on?" when they tune in.
Your analysis is great but you chain analysis of the current event after another. It's basically as if you are playing the game and you are trying keep the same pace as the players. You are assuming that your viewers are staring at the screen following the game as actively as you do. But this isn't really the case and makes it sometimes exhausting to follow. Maybe you need a co-caster to complement you.
Hope you do well and someone hires you. Sometimes a little luck is needed.
Keep being ambitious and working hard man. I think Zoia is right, you've shot up in popularity a lot since you started casting. In my opinion as an onlooker, it's only a matter of time until you start to become one of the more recognized casters in the scene & get regular work at events. Getting it 'made' as an identity in the Starcraft 2 scene is really hard, but try your best to be proud of what you've accomplished. As a player, I personally think your casting quality is some of best in the scene and that reeling in a big job at this point is just a matter of continuously working hard and impressing an employer with your skill/ambition.
And much like the NA players feeling little drive to try competing against the odds in WCS, I know I could do a lot more to improve and try to get forward, but these situations make finding the drive to do all that I can so much more difficult.
Also, you want drive? Watch motivational piccolo. This = ultimate motivation.
The problem with E-Sports is that it demands a lot of effort and contribution [for free, with no reward besides the sentimental satisfaction and the possibility to meet some very, very awesome people] for what would be less or equal to an averagely-paid job (just within a field you enjoy)].
Working in E-Sports is fun, but it's still work and the duties demanded are there all the same.
Add that with the politics of perception, avoiding the automatic public assumption that you're in it for the money or just taking advantage of the community (by asking for donations or trying to live off what increments of money you've made) and you get a very stressful, but addicting work ethic [somehow, there is public shaming in wanting to do this as an actual career].
Good luck with your endeavors. Keep setting your expectations at a realistic horizon and I hope you go far. The entire scene is lead by major people, but the cogs are still a lot of volunteers who do it because they love it.
My advice: Make the right friends, create true personal connections (and not as many as you can) and be consistent. Meeting people in-person definitely furthers opportunities and relationships with some of the most down-to-earth people you'll ever meet.
Commentating is a really competitive area, but it's also an area where you can strive the most and get recognized (moreso than a writer or player-manager), so keep going.
edit:
You make posts on twitter, reddit, and now this blog about how hard it is to get into esports, how much time and effort it takes, and how taxing it is to do what you do. Which is 100% true! Any caster at your level stays up late every night, spams tournaments with their resume, and covers random stuff they don't want to just to get their name out there. However, you have only been casting for what...the last 6 months? Compare yourself to 99.9% of the rest of the scene and your fame has been explosive! From the moment you did the IPL casting gig to the proleaugue cast you have been rising in popularity faster than I've seen anyone in the scene. You've done an IEM now, the acer cup, and I would be completely shocked if you weren't doing this coming dreamhack. In all honesty bud you have nothing to ever complain about and should be more than happy with your current position.
If you're unhappy with where you are, don't resist in speaking out. Be clear where you want to go, where you want to be and the difficulties to get there. No one will know what your goals are unless you speak out about it.
Never compare yourself to others. Efforts can't be measured and they can't be compared due to the very differences in personal situations, circumstances and ability to pursue. Take it from me personally.
I disagree with Zoia's overall point, but I can see he means well.
I disagree with Zoia's overall point, but I can see he means well.
Yeah sometimes I'm not the best at phrasing things. I do stand by most of what I said but my entire goal with my comment was just trying to point out how amazing he is doing and not to be so down all the time. You are right though, its best to speak your mind, let the community know how you feel on the state of things, and don't compare yourself to others. Everyone has their own individual goals and how they want to achieve them.
I was just wanting him to realize how much ass he is kicking compared to the rest of us ^_^
I remember tuning into playhem one day, which I usually do not do. It think it was you and another guy. I was surprised at the quality. For a small tourney like that I didn't expect a lot.
Casting esports seems like a hard market to break into. It seems like an especially long journey unless you already have a foot in the door. This is regardless of your merits as a speaker, player or organizer of a broadcast. If I was an aspiring caster, I would constantly question if what I was doing was the best approach to reaching my goals. The best way of doing it may not be to cast endless amounts of games for almost nothing and twiddle your thumbs waiting for an open spot at one of the major or mid-tier tournaments. It may make you a better caster and give you something to put on your resume, but is it enough to stand out from the crowd of casters who are doing about the same thing?
On April 20 2013 01:34 SinCitta wrote: Have you ever thought of running a show like MrBitter, ChanmanV etc.? I feel you need more of your own content to establish a name for yourself, even if they don't have massive viewer. People should say "Cool, another Nathanias cast" and not "I want to watch Proleague/ATC... is there an English stream on?" when they tune in.
Your analysis is great but you chain analysis of the current event after another. It's basically as if you are playing the game and you are trying keep the same pace as the players. You are assuming that your viewers are staring at the screen following the game as actively as you do. But this isn't really the case and makes it sometimes exhausting to follow. Maybe you need a co-caster to complement you.
Hmm, I do typically focus on trying to follow the action as much as I can. Your comment is the first I've heard from someone about the overall pacing, and I will definitely take it into consideration. I read the article and it makes a very good point, however I don't get too many chances to cast with a partner either way.
As for show stuff, I've been cooking up a few things as of late, especially with my YouTube channel. I do a lot, but without endlessly whoring on reddit a good amount of my stuff doesn't get seen too much.
EPT
