EPTBlame It On The Rain (Post TI2)
*Note* I literally almost deleted 50% of this blog by accident. I nearly had a heart attack and I probably would've given up completely on this.
[
isclaimer* (as always): I was inspired to write a massively ambitious blog post about my TI2 experience in great detail. However, I found myself (about 3-4 hours in) being overwhelmed by the amount of citation and specifics needed to convey my ideas. I also kind of procrastinated by spreading this out over the course of a couple days, so sometimes I picked up right where I left off with a different mentality.At some points it may feel rushed and unspecific but there were simply too many games to cite and then explain fully. I don't think that I can convey all of my thoughts without creating a separate blog for each idea, yet I don't have the time to do so. The tone of the blog is meant to be more personal and less "preachy" compared to the others. All of the views expressed in this blog are strictly my own and should be taken with a grain of salt.
I tried my best to keep it somewhat well-formatted. Ultimately I'm not satisfied with the job I've done since it was rushed and sloppily executed, but I really just wanted to push myself to finish. I implore you to overlook poorly explained sections and take something out of this. ]
It's been a while since I got a chance to sit down and explore my thoughts. There's a lot that I want to express, but firstly I'd like to thank the fans who reached out to me and shared kind words.
I had an outstanding experience in Seattle. Of course, I am fairly disappointed and I have a heart full of regrets. However, I've learned a lot about myself, the game, and the community at large.
There are so many things that I want to talk about. I wrote down a couple of points and I'll focus on them for now. Maybe in the future, I'll expand some more.
A. LAN Setting
B. Mistakes
C. Fans
D. Motivation / What I learned
E. The Pros / Cons
F. Advice
G. Final Thoughts
[A] LAN Setting
The very first thing people pointed out about our team is that we weren't "LAN proven" and that "LAN is a totally different experience". TI2 was, indeed, our very first LAN tournament and there is some truth to statements like those. Although, I have to say, that my experience was more positive than negative.
Perhaps it was the way that Valve tailored and orchestrated the event so very well. Maybe it was because we had comfortable booths or the cozy player's lounge, but I didn't really feel all too pressured. Typically when I walk onto a stage, as a shy Asian male, I would begin to shake or feel butterflies in my stomach. Yet, I didn't seem to notice the viewers scrutinizing my every move or nervous tick. My team also shared the same sentiments, as no one was really being affected negatively by the audience.
Note: As a little bit of insight, I am a rather shy person. I also get nervous, especially when the spotlight is on me. For example, during the Defense 2 I popped open the stream just to gauge the amount of viewers and I instantly started to shiver (for an online tournament!). I understand how irrational it is and I'm pretty self-aware of it all. When I looked out at the audience at TI2, I didn't feel much of anything surprisingly. I believe that the enthusiasm of the audience greatly eased our nerves (expanded on in "C. The Fans").
To dispel any myths or excuses for our team being affected by LAN, the audience and the spotlight didn't greatly contribute to our tournament exit. There was one thing that did irk at me the entire time, which may or may not be considered a big deal. If anyone had taken notice, most of the teams were yelling inside of the booths (as opposed to using headsets and microphones). This greatly affected the dynamic of my team's communication and we weren't prepared to raise our voices (expanded on in "E. The Cons").
*edit: Upon more thought I did remember sometimes blanking out on details when it comes to the drafts. I, sometimes, found myself being unable to think but only very temporarily.*
For the most part my experience has been positive and fun. Valve treated us extremely well and I know that The International tournaments can only see rapid growth going into the future.
[B] Mistakes
If there's anything I constantly dwell on, it is the mistakes. I won't get much into the specific mistakes that we made (game-by-game basis), but I'll go over some general ones.
The mistakes that I regret the most have to do with being a proper leader. Let me explain:
Draft (TI2):
During TI2, my drafts were really underwhelming compared to what I normally work with. We didn't seize any opportunities to use many of the lineups we had prepared due to pure timidity on my part. I believe that I was not properly asserting myself as the captain of this team. As a result, our drafts were a mix of ideas and philosophies instead of having one singular focus or direction. I think this is something that any captain can learn from.
Our manager Chappy said something to me that I'll never forget:
"Too many cooks spoil the broth".
If ever a proverb that a drafter can learn from, this is it. In essence, I gave into one of my weaknesses, which is the tendency to believe in others before myself. I feel like this is something that I need to develop further as a skill, moving into the future.
It's always hard to swallow blame and take the criticism. It's also extremely hard to assume the responsibility for your failures. However, if one is to be a successful DotA 2 captain, one must develop confidence and assume responsibility.
Puppey: Puppey is, in my mind, the best captain in the world. I admire him greatly and I aspire to reach his level of confidence and ability.
I learned, indirectly, from him that a team should be a reflection of a leader's will. It sounds arrogant and cocky at first, but it really isn't. It's not about ego, rather it's about structure and direction. Only a couple of people should ultimately affect the drafts, and it IS up to the captain to make the final decision.
I definitely understand this principle now. The International has been an experience that I can greatly learn from. So moving forward, I hope that other team leader's can avoid such a mistake.
Throughout TI2, as we progressed further into the tournament, I began to have some realizations (I have a ton of thoughts about this but it'd be a totally separate blog, in itself if I don't just post notes):
1. Playing the Chinese game will not win the tournament outright. (Method)
-The Chinese are simply too disciplined and will not make any unnecessary mistakes.
-They practiced countless hours to dictate the pace of the game and they know exactly what they'll be doing for the first 15-20 minutes.
-Their strategies are predictable, but extremely well-run.
-One or two mistakes can lose you a game if you try to beat them at their own game.
-They hold onto advantages as long as possible and enter "slow death phase" as 2009 would put it. Teams are unlikely to come back once they've reached a certain point of disadvantage.
-I felt like it was necessary for western teams to create chaos to disrupt their calculated actions. However, many of the teams were not mentally prepared to take risks in high profile matches.
2. The metagame must be broken in such a tournament to succeed. (Process)
-2nd pick was 85% of the time banning the same 3 heroes and it was highly abusable for first pick to take advantage of this.
-My observation was that many teams (including ours) were too invested in avoiding heroes than adjusting to the teams themselves (i.e. banning morphling, invoker). Ultimately we were playing right into the enemies hands by auto-banning.
-My contention is that drafts should all be team specific and aimed at shutting down strengths in the banning phase. So-called "Imbalanced" heroes MUST be dealt with and they MUST have adequate preparation against (many teams simply avoided them in bootcamps or played once or twice against them like lycan/naga/ds).
-At some point in the event all of the strategies and heroes a team has practiced many times in bootcamp will need to be replaced by new and untested ones. There must be a shift of mentality and an adaption to circumstances by the captain.
-In essence a team cannot fully prepare (no matter the amount of hours) for a tournament of this magnitude and new metagames must be born within the event itself.
3. Winners are the one's who take chances.(Chaos)
-Once a team has circumvented the issue of auto-banning, it creates chaos and pressure.
-A team that is versatile enough to handle each and every possible draft outcome with "imbalanced" heroes in the pool will strike a massive amount of terror in the other team's minds.
-Many of the Chinese teams expect to play a standard game nearly 95% of the time. Creating this unpleasant atmosphere can often destroy their game plans.
-Take for example Na`Vi's matches against LGD / iG. They shattered the metagame and formed chaos and confusion. We often saw Naga Siren being passed up because it was defeated.
-We've seen players such as Zhou break down and attempt to push and team fight over farming once his pace got disrupted (ganks/ laning disadvantages). It was very apparent that he was flustered by the situations he wasn't comfortable with.
-The best team will be the team that is mentally prepared to challenge everything and relinquish fear and hesitation.
Draft (Bootcamp):
I was asked a question for an interview recently that pertains to this. My response was:
"I feel that I should've prepared more strategies and been much more creative going into the event. I wish that I spent more time developing technology rather than trying to beat a lineup to death. We felt really confident during our practice and that definitely is a weakness. Winning a massive portion of our games and tournaments kind of instilled a sense of complacency. Towards the end we didn't utilize our time as effectively as the beginning weeks. I really regret not pursuing a more active role in innovating ourselves time and time again. I believed that we met something near our potentials at that time, but in fact the ceiling is only there to be surpassed."
Basically we were extremely confident coming out of our bootcamp. We had an amazing amount of success in terms of win rates and we felt that we were prepared. We didn't test our limits and try to innovate anything. All we did was finely tune some aspects of our game. At heart, I'm an aggressive captain and I like to be creative. However, with our successes I decided to play more conservatively. It was the most painless process.
To expand on that: What I mean is that when you try to be creative and be aggressive you are subject to losing a lot. You are subject to blame, scrutiny, and negativity. However, when you fine tune a tried and true method, the blame itself can be dispersed among every team member. It is much easier to handle defeats when you can hold everyone accountable. As a captain I failed to believe in myself and take risks. I willingly chose to appease my teammates and shift blame instead of taking full responsibility.
[C] Fans
Having fans was something that I always held in the back of my mind. It's kind of a surreal experience that I couldn't fully process. I never believed that I was someone to be looked up to or someone who really mattered. I never noticed any change in my mentality. I was a normal guy playing video games and I happened to win a couple of tournament games.
Of course I heard things like, "I'm a fan, good luck!". I just looked to each fan and humbly said my thanks. However my experience with TI2 and real life fans changed my perspective.
There is just something about actually seeing people in person that makes this experience real. Being online didn't reflect all that much to me. I found myself wanting to go outside to meet and greet. That's just not normal for me, it really isn't. I felt a bit of gratitude towards these people who supported our team. It was really humbling, all in all. I can't really express how eye-opening my experience has been with our fans.
Continuing on with this:
[ When I looked out at the audience at TI2, I didn't feel much of anything surprisingly. I believe that the enthusiasm of the audience greatly eased our nerves (expanded on in "C. The Fans"). ]
I didn't know what to expect from my first time on stage.
-Would I crack under the pressure?
-Would I get nervous?
-How will I act and perform?
All of these thoughts briefly raced through my head. I tried not to think about it so much. However, I found that the crowd was amazing. It was really comforting to see people cheering for us.
I had somewhat doubted my place in professional gaming. Whether I had intended it or not, gaming is a form of escapism to some degree. I'm an introverted guy who enjoys intimate conversations with a couple of good people. Being in the limelight seemed oddly laughable and absurd. So, really the doubts would often fill my mind very quickly and out of the blue.
However, my experience with the fans and the crowds really reasserted my belief that I belong here. Most of my doubts were shattered once I noticed really warm regards and good will. To say the least, I really enjoyed it.
Another aspect of The International 2 that I noticed was the overwhelming sense of community. The crowd wasn't overly biased to teams and they definitely cheered for each and every team. It wasn't about who was the most popular, it was just about DotA. It seemed like everyone really loved the game and wanted to be involved. Even the players, themselves, hollered and cheered for teams they weren't on good terms with online.
Almost all of the players were extremely friendly and totally unlike how I had suspected online. Everyone was just having fun and enjoying the attention that DotA 2 was getting. It really goes to show that people can be real as*hole trolls online but perfectly nice and great people offline (I much prefer it that way).
It was also extremely funny to read Reddit along the whole way. Crazy fan-art, movies, and threads made us laugh our asses off. There was just an explosion of energy that I've never experienced before. I'm really honored to be a part of this process.
[D] Motivation / What I learned
I found some new intrinsic motivation to continue with DotA 2. I want to be the most versatile captain in the scene. I want to be able to do all of the things that I talked about earlier. My main philosophy in DotA is that everything is possible and everything can be countered. I'll keep this section short. Mainly, I understand that I will lose a lot more than I'm comfortable with moving forward. However, It will all be for my goal of being a really strong and confident captain. Success takes time and I'm willing to exercise my patience.
[E] The Pros / Cons
The Pros:
*Note* We all witnessed the tournament and how great it was. Obviously there are so many pros, but I'll list what I felt were the biggest things.
-Organization
-Professionalism
-Valve catering to the community
-Community effort and comradery
-The experience
The Cons:
*Note* On to the only complaint and negative thing that I have to say about The International 2.
Voice Communication. Like I mentioned earlier, did anyone notice that many teams were shouting in their booths instead of using mics/headsets? There was a reason for this.
As many of us know, DotA 2's in-game voice chat is not where it needs to be at the moment. There isn't enough customization to allow for players voices to be heard over in-game sound effects and the ambiance. On top of that, there is actually a pretty substantial delay (for pro players). Basically many of the teams refused to use it because it was actually more crippling to the dynamics of communication.
When you sit next to your teammate and he uses in-game, you can hear him first then in-game. It felt really sluggish and hard to concentrate when we heard everyone twice over.
There was a solution to this right? No. The only solution given to us was to just yell and shout at each other. I really wished that Valve would've let us download our voice communication software such as Skype, mumble or ventrilo. However, it was made very very clear that this was not a possibility.
The reason for this was that it might've been a hazard for cheating. Who's to say that a team would not have someone sit in their call or channel and feed them outside information. Yes, this is definitely something that could've ruined the whole tournament. However, there was a really simple solution. Buyout one large mumble server and have admins monitor it from backstage. On top of this, there were staff members in our booths who could easily detect teams saying suspicious things to each other.
So you might be wondering, "what's the big deal?". Well the big deal is that the "soundproof booths" were in fact not completely soundproof. Most of the teams did hear a lot of the hoots, hollers, and gasps from the audience. An example would be when team Zenith tried to sneak in a level one Roshan on stage and the audience completely gave it away to their opponents.
We often couldn't hear ourselves over the audience in tense situations. Thus, we had to yell at each other and shout at the top of our lungs. This is something that we hadn't practice and I'm sure many of the other western teams haven't either. It was more draining on our voices, our energy, and it disrupted our flow of communication (speaking for compLexity).
Personally, we use mumble. Mumble has almost no delay, attenuates the volumes when people speak, and it cleans up the audio quality (avoid the white noise and background effects). It could've been any program really, but we prefer mumble. Basically, there NEEDED to be some sort of voice communication option besides in-game.
Our team is a team that thrives on communication. It might be our strongest attribute as a team. I like knowing that my team can hear me clear and effectively, instead of having to repeat my intentions two or three times. It makes it much easier to focus and get concentrated. When I had to constantly call out orders in the HOPES that people on the far ends of the booth were receiving it, I felt impatient.
When games are tense and any simple miscommunication can affect the outcome, there is literally no time to repeat yourself. I didn't have enough time to calmly call out objectives and focus. No, in DotA there are things that need to be done instantly or the opportunity is lost. My mind races from one order to the next in a matter of seconds. I felt like we didn't experience the same dynamic with communication that we were used to (or even barely used to).
Yelling on LAN was a completely different beast. The Chinese teams seemed to thrive in this kind of situation. Whereas our team suffered heavily. Perhaps that was an oversight by us. Maybe we should've practiced it, but it's not even something that I'm capable of doing often times.
For example, when I was playing in one of the games on stage. I was trying to yell out specific directions in a fight. My voice doesn't reach certain notes and I found myself not letting out any sound. If you've got a deep voice you can sympathize. Just attempting to reach high notes without practice seems impossible. Your voice kind of gives out a wheezing noise that is unrecognizable to human ears. This happened a lot.
Some of my teammates even explained that yelling and shouting often startled them. Literally their body would get excited or jump because of the intensity of our voices. It was something that couldn't be helped. In doing so, we had people just completely uncomfortable in that environment.
I know that I ranted quite a long time about this, but it really strikes close to my heart. As a communication-based team, I really regret not performing to the standards that I had witnessed all along in our practice. I'm not blaming our indecision and mistakes on this, but I know that it played a role in our losses.
I still blame myself, firstly, for not being the best possible captain at the time and not utilizing my time properly. I wish that I had been more confident in myself and my team would have been more confident in me. I had a great experience with TI2 and I think Valve did everything in their power to make it a great success. Don't take this as a cop out or an excuse. I accept full responsibility for letting my team down and our fans. I will try my best to reach my maximum potential.
[F] Advice
I got a lot of questions about how to improve and how to proceed. I'll break it down into two lists: Beginners and Advanced players.
Beginners:
When I was first starting out with DotA 1 many years ago, I decided that I wanted to get good at the game. From a completely noob standpoint, I decided upon a goal. My goal was that I was going to learn every single hero in the game, one by one. What I did was pick a hero in pubs and play it nonstop for however long it took to feel comfortable with it (hours, days, or weeks). Some heroes are easier to learn than others, but don't be afraid to play more complex heroes.
I think now it is much easier to understand heroes and learn how to play them. Search for guides and learn what people skill and do from watching replays or live games. The key is focusing on one hero at a time. Being a jack of all trades, master of none doesn't suit DotA. I think you want to master as many heroes as possible. Figure out who your best heroes are and whip them out when you want to win. Be proud of the heroes you're good at and keep them in mind (in case you want to proceed into higher level play).
You should play every hero in the game at least 3-4 times. You can drop heroes that you just don't like once you've experienced them first-hand. I hear a lot of people say things like "this hero is imbalanced", when they play against it. Well my advice is to play the "imbalanced" heroes and you'll find out their weaknesses and drawbacks.
Add players who you think are friendly and you'll enjoy playing with. Try to filter out trolls and find people who genuinely like playing and want to improve. Network yourself, this is really important. Your friend could be a friend of a friend with really great players and you can learn a lot from them. You never know who you'll run into and how you'll meet them.
Advanced Players:
If you're stuck at a mid-high skill range, I heavily suggest investing time in a team. It doesn't have to be a serious team, maybe just a bunch of ringers. Try to scrim instead of pubbing. There is just so much more value to the game at a competitive level. You'll learn your place and you'll learn what it truly means to play the game of DotA. There are plenty of places to find scrims, for example logging into quakenet on mIRC "#dota2.cw". This is a really great place to go for teams of all skill levels. Find a match, decide on a server and play!
You'll find your greatest periods of growth will come from playing captain's mode games with players that are better than you. Try to suck up your pride and learn from good players. I talked about it in my other blogs, but try your best to find mentors. I always experienced tremendous amounts of growth when I found a teacher. Even now, I look for teachers. Different perspectives can really strengthen your play.
I honestly believe forming a team is the best way to improve. I'd go on but I would just repeat information found in my other blogs. Check them out if you're looking to form a team.
Here's a bit of insight for you. I don't believe that there are "godlike players". The best players are the players who practice harder than anyone else. No one is extremely gifted and just naturally talented. It takes a lot of hard work. The differences between intermediate players and advanced players are really much smaller than you think.
I really hope that you don't look at pros and say "I'll never be like that" or that it's impossible. It really isn't, far from it. Take my advice, albeit blindly. The only person stopping you from competing at the highest level is yourself. Your mentality, your dedication and your focus. You'll never know until you try, and I really hope that you do.
[G] Final Thoughts
Finally, after days and hours of procrastinating. I have finally finished, even though it was rushed. I just really wanted to express my gratitude and share my experiences. I get a lot of questions regarding TI2 and I hope that I addressed a good number of them. DotA 2 can only grow with the support that Valve is putting into it.
I'm going to quickly read over it one time and publish. There haven't been any real edits, because I just want to relax. I definitely didn't cover all the points that I wanted to originally .
I'm also going to be heading back into school, so I might not be able to dedicate as much time as I had previously this year. However, the time that I spend will be meaningful.
It's okay to fail, so long as you learn from it.
-FLUFF
