Sometimes you disappoint and hurt someone even if it wasn't your intention.
I probally lost the trust of a friend whose company I really enjoyed, it wasn't anything big, what I said wasn't in ill intention nor has it caused harm since it was sorted out later...
The worst thing about it is that I was completely unaware of what I was saying, I am one who's not afraid to and often tells hard truths if the moment is there for it.
Problem is that, that someone didn't know it or didn't want to acknowledge, it's as silly as it gets since I could've said it without putting my friend's name on it.
And I fear this will have effects on how much people is gonna trust me, I hope not, but I think so.
Something happens once it's a mistake, something happens twice and it's a tendency.
Wouldn't usually post something on TL solely to rant like this, but I'm writing a project due for wendsday and I need to get this out of my system, while remaining as anonymous as possible and I feel better after writing this, so bear with me
On December 11 2012 07:26 SweetNJoshSauce wrote: Well..... What happened?
Well it happend out of stupidity from my side, I'm a talkative motherfucker in real life and somehow I am bad at not keeping things secret which I take as common knowledge, doesn't make it better than what I said was interpreted worse than it actually was, especially since it is true. While I write this I realize it doesn't really give away much, basically I had been told and had generally viewed as "an unfortunate" quality that she had I was kinda sure she knew about it and atleast wasn't stranger to it ( I know she heard of it before, but apparently not, obviously).
Basically I said something that I didn't think of as a secret untill I was confronted with it, when I instantly realized it but oh wellz
Irony: I told her that she was untrustworthy while being drunk, I feel a bit hypocritical too now, haha (though what she did actually harmed people alot more than me, doesn't make it better one bit)
I am not used to hurting people who's precious to me, so it actually hit me quite hard.
Note: I was drunk when I fucked up if it counts for something <.< fucking scumbag alcohol
Being a tattle tale is bad. Doing this kind of shit will indeed hurt people's trust in you. However, if you don't screw up again people will forget/forgive so be easy.
On December 11 2012 07:48 B.I.G. wrote: Being a tattle tale is bad. Doing this kind of shit will indeed hurt people's trust in you. However, if you don't screw up again people will forget/forgive so be easy.
Encouraging but trust never heals completely, but I'll hope, it's not like said person hates me or anything, she just won't let me in on her secrets anymore.. which honestly isn't my business, but it can hurt when you've been at that level of trust and then lose it
It can be a tough pill to swallow that you fuck as I am painfully aware of which consequences it has had and which it might have in the future..
I'm curious as to how you managed to get her back into any sort of friendship status, I recently drunkenly revealed details of something I shouldn't have to the best friends of a friend who I have apparently betrayed or something... In my drunken mind it was OK since they were her good friends and probably already knew about it; anytime I try to speak to her to figure out what I actually did she refuses to speak with me. I've tried twice now, I think that I'll just give her an open apology and time but I doubt that it will ever be the same... The worst thing is is that I can only remember doing it very very vaguely and she's starting to act like an immature bitch around me, hinting at possible guy relationships that another one of her friends (who recently was in some relationship with me and I still have feelings for) has in a blatantly malicious way. It will be funny because when her "boyfriend" (this is in brackets because its one fucked up relationship that they have) gets back to the country he happens to be a very good friend of mine so we will constantly be in the same room for extended periods of time, I'm willing to apologise and everything but she's really doing her best to make it goddamn near impossible z_z,;;
Why is it so hard for people to divulge their issues on the internet? You really think we are going to recognize you in the street or something? It'll make your blogs much more interesting instead of getting half of a "story" that doesn't say anything but instead tries to teach us a lesson without a proper example.
On December 11 2012 08:31 MyTHicaL wrote: I'm curious as to how you managed to get her back into any sort of friendship status, I recently drunkenly revealed details of something I shouldn't have to the best friends of a friend who I have apparently betrayed or something... In my drunken mind it was OK since they were her good friends and probably already knew about it; anytime I try to speak to her to figure out what I actually did she refuses to speak with me. I've tried twice now, I think that I'll just give her an open apology and time but I doubt that it will ever be the same... The worst thing is is that I can only remember doing it very very vaguely and she's starting to act like an immature bitch around me, hinting at possible guy relationships that another one of her friends (who recently was in some relationship with me and I still have feelings for) has in a blatantly malicious way. It will be funny because when her "boyfriend" (this is in brackets because its one fucked up relationship that they have) gets back to the country he happens to be a very good friend of mine so we will constantly be in the same room for extended periods of time, I'm willing to apologise and everything but she's really doing her best to make it goddamn near impossible z_z,;;
I actually don't know, she isn't the kind of person who'd go from being able to tell me pretty much everything to just hate me or dislike me in general, I hope I am right and that I can have it sorted out.
And your situation is kinda similar to mine, as I will inevitably see her again etc, but I think it'll be better once it cools down.. idk man I haven't talked to her in person about it yet, I definitly will, if nothing else it will let me give a clearer explanation and apology if need be.
TO the other guy, even if it's silly keeping details to a minimum is better for me, as I can't really tell exactly what happend without and under which circumstances without coming off as a hypcorite, and as I said, I wrote this blog with the purpose off letting it out somewhere
On December 11 2012 08:44 thoraxe wrote: Why is it so hard for people to divulge their issues on the internet? You really think we are going to recognize you in the street or something? It'll make your blogs much more interesting instead of getting half of a "story" that doesn't say anything but instead tries to teach us a lesson without a proper example.
Because even though the likelyhood of her or anyone else I know reads this is incredibly small; the possibility still exists and would make matters infinitely (maybe miss-spelt sorry) worse, and a blog doesn't have to be interesting go watch a soap opera if you want juicy details; coronation street, hollyoaks, eastenders, etc.
Yeah I know its similar to yours, that's why I posted it here!
I just hate apologizing but I hate social tensions more, if I go to bed sober (I'm currently in the UK so it doesn't happen very often) I spend litterally 2 hours thinking about it -_-;: I think that I just get retardedly attatched to people along with any other psycholigcal problems that I might have zzzzz
On December 11 2012 08:44 thoraxe wrote: Why is it so hard for people to divulge their issues on the internet? You really think we are going to recognize you in the street or something? It'll make your blogs much more interesting instead of getting half of a "story" that doesn't say anything but instead tries to teach us a lesson without a proper example.
Because even though the likelyhood of her or anyone else I know reads this is incredibly small; the possibility still exists and would make matters infinitely (maybe miss-spelt sorry) worse, and a blog doesn't have to be interesting go watch a soap opera if you want juicy details; coronation street, hollyoaks, eastenders, etc.
Yeah I know its similar to yours, that's why I posted it here!
I just hate apologizing but I hate social tensions more, if I go to bed sober (I'm currently in the UK so it doesn't happen very often) I spend litterally 2 hours thinking about it -_-;: I think that I just get retardedly attatched to people along with any other psycholigcal problems that I might have zzzzz
More similar than you know, I am riddicolously close to her brother and I am worrying that this might affect my relationship with him as well..
on the other hand he could also be one to help me rebuild the bridge
On December 11 2012 07:48 B.I.G. wrote: Being a tattle tale is bad. Doing this kind of shit will indeed hurt people's trust in you. However, if you don't screw up again people will forget/forgive so be easy.
Encouraging but trust never heals completely, but I'll hope, it's not like said person hates me or anything, she just won't let me in on her secrets anymore.. which honestly isn't my business, but it can hurt when you've been at that level of trust and then lose it
It can be a tough pill to swallow that you fuck as I am painfully aware of which consequences it has had and which it might have in the future..
Sometimes you screw up. That´s part of growing up. At least now you know not to do it anymore. And yeah it hurts that someone doesn´t trust you anymore, but sorry for saying, but it serves you right. Screwing over your friends is a bad, bad habit.
On December 11 2012 07:48 B.I.G. wrote: Being a tattle tale is bad. Doing this kind of shit will indeed hurt people's trust in you. However, if you don't screw up again people will forget/forgive so be easy.
Encouraging but trust never heals completely, but I'll hope, it's not like said person hates me or anything, she just won't let me in on her secrets anymore.. which honestly isn't my business, but it can hurt when you've been at that level of trust and then lose it
It can be a tough pill to swallow that you fuck as I am painfully aware of which consequences it has had and which it might have in the future..
Sometimes you screw up. That´s part of growing up. At least now you know not to do it anymore. And yeah it hurts that someone doesn´t trust you anymore, but sorry for saying, but it serves you right. Screwing over your friends is a bad, bad habit.
don't be sorry for saying something true, I just get more annoyed with this the more I think about it
I don't think that this is true; part of having a friendship with someone includes forgiveness... One of my best friends in France forgave me for something much much worse. I guess it just depends on the person and how much he/she values you. Part of the problem is that the girl I'm talking about is black and doesn't generally like or trust white people (I have 100% Scottish origins), but whatever I think that eventually I'll stop caring and it will be more difficult for her to act this way to someone who is completely indifferent about the situation.
And yeah if her bro is a good friend of yours and she sees him on a regular basis then the simple fact that you spend time with her- whether or not she acts normally to you; should help the situation atleast that's what I hope will happen with me, replacing brother with "boyfriend" obviously.
But shit you say drunk should never be taken completely seriously, though the fact that I said shit about her makes me scared that if I drink too much I might reveal secrets, awful secrets about other people. I don't think I will but this makes me wonder Z_z;:
EPT
