EPTYou've Got Spam! - Page 3
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rUiNati0n
United States1155 Posts
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Rimstalker
Germany734 Posts
This here was the most recent one I found: Greeting to you, Let my letter not be a surprise to you. My name is Mrs. Melly from Philippines but based here in Burkina Faso as a business woman dealing with gold exportation. I am a sick woman who has decided to donate what I have to charity through you. You may be wondering why I chose you. But someone has to be chosen. I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer disease which doctors have confirmed that i have just few days to leave, Now that I’m ending the race like this, without any family members and no child, I have ($200.000) in one of my bank account here which I instructed the bank to distribute to orphanage Homes here in Burkina Faso and it’s done already, Then after my prayer today my spirit moved me to search on internet and contact any lucky person and hand over the sum of ($750.000) usd in my other account to the person for the help of orphanages homes, motherless baby homes and charity homes in his/her country and for my soul to rest with God. But you must assure me that you will take 30% of the money and share the rest to the orphanages homes, motherless baby homes, and charity homes in your country, If you can respect this my wish and assure me that you will use the money as I instructed when I have left, kindly get back to me urgently to enable me forward you the bank contact details and my International passport for them to change the funds to your own name and transfer it to you because without presenting my International passport the bank will never listen to you, Get back to me urgently if you can help me to fulfill my wish, Note that according to the bank rules it will only cost you for change of ownership just to change the fund to your own name and transfer it to you that is all, but if you cannot help me please reply so that I can look for another person because if no one apply for my money when am gone it will go to bank treasury and they will not use it to help the needy once to fulfill my wish. Remain Bless Mrs.Melly | ||
Byzantium
United States423 Posts
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SilSol
Sweden2744 Posts
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HoMM
Estonia635 Posts
On August 25 2012 01:46 Falling wrote: But in the last year or so my hotmail addresses have been completely over-run by spam. To the extent that whenever I sign in, it says my account is being blocked. Apparently No, that's when someone has hacked your account and is using your account to send e-mails to other people. | ||
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9-BiT
United States1089 Posts
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MysteryMeat1
United States3292 Posts
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semioldguy
United States7488 Posts
If you want you can jump up and have your member come crashing down upon the egg, or use your hand and wield your wiener like a sword, or do a hand stand and pull your dick back to release it and flick the egg (you might have to have someone else help you if you busy doing a handstand), or drop the egg in your tightey-whiteys and have the power of arousal and no expansion space crack through the egg. Or go through a whole dozen eggs with a dozen different methods. Get creative, do what you think will work. I have no idea if breaking an egg with an erection is even going to be hard to do (pun intended)... but there is only one way to find out. | ||
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ReketSomething
United States6012 Posts
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NrG.Bamboo
United States2756 Posts
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nttea
Sweden4353 Posts
On August 26 2012 10:10 semioldguy wrote: I don't think there should be many rules for how to break an egg with your penis, as long as contact from your hardon is what breaks the egg. There should be no tying a sharp, hard object to your cock like it has a mechanical arm and hitting it with the object or using your cockring to crack the egg. No cyborg penises allowed. 100% flesh only. If you want you can jump up and have your member come crashing down upon the egg, or use your hand and wield your wiener like a sword, or do a hand stand and pull your dick back to release it and flick the egg (you might have to have someone else help you if you busy doing a handstand), or drop the egg in your tightey-whiteys and have the power of arousal and no expansion space crack through the egg. Or go through a whole dozen eggs with a dozen different methods. Get creative, do what you think will work. I have no idea if breaking an egg with an erection is even going to be hard to do (pun intended)... but there is only one way to find out. you could just put your penis between the egg and your hand and push, obviously that would be cheating as even a non hard penis would break it. I think the fair way seems to be put egg on hard surface, then swing your penis against it if it's big and hard enough it breaks the egg :D | ||
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starfries
Canada3508 Posts
but it might be kind of difficult to get it really hard while you're wielding an egg. I imagine eggshells would keep popping into your mind and ruining the mood. | ||
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Eufouria
United Kingdom4425 Posts
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JingleHell
United States11308 Posts
At least semioldguy isn't being a dick-tator about how to do it. | ||
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JieXian
Malaysia4677 Posts
On August 25 2012 02:57 Bibbit wrote: Haha there's some great ones in there :D That egg breaker! Also reminds me of this Cracked article. One of the funniest things on the internet imo :D ![[image loading]](http://cdn-www.cracked.com/articleimages/wong/spam/spam364.gif) On August 25 2012 06:01 Chocolate wrote: When looking at my mom's spam email recently, one of the websites in her folder was "Black People Meet." I have a feeling they don't really peg anyone as anything. Just by looking at her email, it's pretty obvious that we have the most German last name in existence. and what would that be? On August 25 2012 04:05 Eufouria wrote: It would be interesting to create a bunch of throwaway accounts and use each one once on a well known website and then see whether the accounts end up getting any spam emails. good idea. And label the user name according to the website to keep track of it. like jiexian_teamliquid@gmail.com for example :D | ||
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Sephy90
United States1785 Posts
On August 25 2012 03:16 semioldguy wrote: That Cracked article is hilarious, hadn't seen that before. This one had me laughing like an idiot.. son of a bitch man I was almost in tears. ![[image loading]](http://i.imgur.com/w5Ur2.gif) | ||
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iTzSnypah
United States1738 Posts
"The McDonald's Double Quarter-Pounder. It's so good..." ![[image loading]](http://cdn-www.cracked.com/articleimages/wong/spam/spam333.gif) | ||
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Randomaccount#77123
United States5003 Posts
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Maxd11
United States680 Posts
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Steelavocado
United States2123 Posts
On August 26 2012 10:10 semioldguy wrote: I don't think there should be many rules for how to break an egg with your penis, as long as contact from your hardon is what breaks the egg. There should be no tying a sharp, hard object to your cock like it has a mechanical arm and hitting it with the object or using your cockring to crack the egg. No cyborg penises allowed. 100% flesh only. If you want you can jump up and have your member come crashing down upon the egg, or use your hand and wield your wiener like a sword, or do a hand stand and pull your dick back to release it and flick the egg (you might have to have someone else help you if you busy doing a handstand), or drop the egg in your tightey-whiteys and have the power of arousal and no expansion space crack through the egg. Or go through a whole dozen eggs with a dozen different methods. Get creative, do what you think will work. I have no idea if breaking an egg with an erection is even going to be hard to do (pun intended)... but there is only one way to find out. Mother of god... 5/5 | ||
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