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WTF is with this creeper talk in here?
1. The definition of a creeper is a man in his 50s working in the produce section when I went to buy groceries last summer. Said hi, then asked if I was a student at the uni, then if I lived nearby, if I had a bf, how old I was, what my name was... followed me all the way across the store to his manager, asking for my number. (I am 20).
2. It's not really creeping if you try to get someone's number, whether you are male or female, unless you haven't met them before... (silent fb stalkers who are friends of friends of acquaintances)
3. Being creeped on is not flattering or attractive. It's scary. Anyone who has genuinely had an experience with one of those people can tell you that being stalked and harassed is not fun, does not make you feel better about yourself, and often is not something you can take much action against except run the fuck away.
Anyway, at the end of your evening when you are taking her home, say: I wondered if you would like to go with me to do ________ on ______. Make it something specific, and try to pick an activity that allows the two of you to interact and get to know each other better. It will be pretty obvious to her how you feel if you are spending one-on-one time together. If it goes well, set up another 'date' or whatever, but don't wait too long to be honest about how you feel. Just say: hey, I really like you, and I like spending time with you. If she reciprocates, tell her you want her to be your gf.
If she doesn't like you she will make an effort not to spend alone time with you, keep it really platonic if it does happen, and not respond positively if you say you like her.
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Simply: give it a try! Nothing to lose here, as long as you play it natural and within legal bounds (no illegal drinking!).
As I said in another blog recently... just go for it, even if things don't work out at the end at least you'll have a nice story to tell over a beer. Take it a step at a time, don't ever think about the long term future, and enjoy it day-to-day!
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If a chick goes to the effort of tracking your number down and you don't get laid by the second date, it's very much your own fault.
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If you're looking for a possible relationship, ask her out. She's clearly attracted to you already, so it's not like you need to overly impress her. You can also be realistic about the date and not have ridiculous hopes and expectations. Be straight with her. And if she declines for some odd reason, then it's her loss, not yours.
If you're not looking for a relationship right now, then don't ask her out on a date. That's pretty straightforward. And if she asks you out, let her know why you'd like to only remain friends/ friends of friends. However, I'm not sure why you would be necessarily opposed to even the possibility of a relationship (unless it was for financial reasons or you're not emotionally available or something of that nature).
Regardless, figure out what you want and make sure she knows where she stands. Be open and honest about it.
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On April 11 2012 19:33 RedJustice wrote:
Anyway, at the end of your evening when you are taking her home, say: I wondered if you would like to go with me to do ________ on ______. Make it something specific, and try to pick an activity that allows the two of you to interact and get to know each other better. It will be pretty obvious to her how you feel if you are spending one-on-one time together. If it goes well, set up another 'date' or whatever, but don't wait too long to be honest about how you feel. Just say: hey, I really like you, and I like spending time with you. If she reciprocates, tell her you want her to be your gf.
This.
You (OP) are not professing a deep, dark, brooding love. You're interested in a girl and the outline above is pretty much the best way to get to know her better. Knowing her better means you'll know if she's someone YOU want to pursue. I also commend you for your efforts to treat her with more respect than a one-night stand. Women don't deserve that, especially ones you like!
Over-thinking is your worst enemy. This is a common problem with intelligent guys and seems to be the most common issue in TL girl blogs. You're venturing into unknown territory with another person and there is NEVER 100% assurance. You can try to plan everything out, but then it never goes according to plan. Then you make a new plan, that one fails, and you start working yourself into passivity.
It sounds like you have a window of opportunity, so if you like the girl you should definitely ask her out on a casual date. Neutral public locations are best (movies, dinner, roller rink, symphony, ballroom dancing lessons - whatever tickles the collective fancy!).
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Go for it! Just relax, relax, relax and I can't stress this enough. Enjoy this and if things don't work out and depending how it ends it doesn't hurt to make an extra friend right? You say you're good with women so why not just trust yourself and just go about how you normally would :D:D:D
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Today I learned. Girls don't mind you finding them and adding them on facebook if you've met them?
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On April 12 2012 05:26 obesechicken13 wrote:
Today I learned. Girls don't mind you finding them and adding them on facebook if you've met them?
Depends on the girl.
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EPT
